


I  just want to read the damn thing again

by Sunstargrl



Category: The Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-17
Updated: 2020-04-18
Packaged: 2021-03-02 02:20:32
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 45
Words: 134,092
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23707516
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sunstargrl/pseuds/Sunstargrl
Kudos: 3





	1. Chapter 1

The boy moved with the sort of grace that was so sought after in the throes of passion. That kind of fluid sexuality that could not be taught, only ingrained from birth. He was the kind of boy that had probably broken hearts since he was in preschool.

He was wearing the usual uniform of the cold hearted snakes that slithered through places like this searching for their next little white mouse. His toned chest was visible under the open collar of his charcoal Armani button-down. He wore an open black jacquard vest over that which flapped and flowed with his movements. His dark hair was carefully tousled, having that irritatingly sexy, just-fucked look, like he was channeling Robert Pattinson. The best part, though, was under those loose-fitting, slouching dark True Religion jeans, above the spotlessly white old school shell-top Adidas. He had the ass of a Greek god. It was perfectly visible every time he ground his narrow hips into the voluptuous brunette he was dancing with.

"Could you be any more obvious? Jesus, you're like a vulture. Beady-eyed and constantly circling," Camille observed, sounding bored as she sipped her Electric Lemonade in the corner booth.

"It's only obvious to you. And you never know, the poor girl could drop dead any second. Then I could swoop in and lick up the jizz she undoubtedly leaves behind," Magnus retorted, also taking a sip of his identical blue cocktail. Camille snorted, a small smile creeping across her face. Magnus returned it. "Plus," he continued, "I'm allowed to check out anyone I want that walks in here. That's one of the perks of owning the establishment," he said with a haughty air, sipping some more.

The two friends currently occupied the buttery leather corner booth of Cherry Bomb, New York's hottest new lounge. Magnus loathed the name "club", because it usually called up images of grinding teenagers and a shitty techno soundtrack stored in a huge warehouse somewhere on the Jersey Shore. His place was rather small, with more couch space than dance floor, but still had the appeal of giving the opportunity to find a hottie or two to rub on to the beat of something intoxicating.

This was his escape. He loved to sink into the ocean of bodies, brushing up against the elite and obscure alike. It was his addiction: loud music, glitz, and sweat.

His partner in crime, seated at his side, had helped him design the place. She acknowledged that he had a tendency to overdo the glam, and she was there to help pull it back a little. Between the two of them, the place had turned into a soothing yet alive whirlwind of leather and velvet, glitter and low lighting. They had mutually agreed on the purple theme, that having been the favorite color of both of them. The black lacquer dance floor in the middle, however, was all Magnus. Anyone who knew him could tell, because just beneath the glossy clear coating over the top, there were millions of flecks of glitter in every color of the rainbow. When the lights hit it, it had a way of mesmerizing the eye to the point of dizziness. Magnus loved it. It wasn't even tacky, which was what Camille had feared. Even she agreed that it was a genius idea. It added just the right amount of color to the otherwise dark and mysterious atmosphere.

When Magnus glanced back up from his drink, he'd lost the boy he'd been staring at for the past five or ten minutes. No matter. The place was packed full of a hundred more just like him, and they were all just as beautiful, if not as graceful. Magnus had a weak spot for that sort of tightly contained elegance that was so rare in this town of hard hitters and conventional beauty. He liked the odd ones, the ones who were beautiful but had something about them that was a little off. It was that little imperfection that he searched for, because it usually meant realism underneath. This town was so chock full of saline and botox, it was hard to pick out what was real anymore, without being able to find the imperfections. Case in point: his best friend next to him.

Camille was one of those girls that made most men weep with desire. She was nearly as tall as him (and he was six foot four, so that was saying something), and had flowing platinum blonde hair (from a bottle, of course), double D's filling her Agent Provocateur lingerie (the bra was a gift from Sam, a stock broker from the Upper East Side, and the boobs were from a married producer she met in the Hamptons), and a nose sculpted to perfection so many times, Michelangelo would be envious. She was one of those women that strived for perfection and would pay most anything for it, but usually had it given to her by one of her many suitors.

Magnus, on the other hand, was what Camille usually called infuriating. Everything most people strived for, he was born with. He had a fine boned face, with a delicate, aristocratic nose, high cheekbones and perfectly almond shaped eyes. The irises were the most unusual shade of green-yellow, a contrast to Camille's emerald orbs. They were enticing, usually the first thing people noticed about him. He was very tall and slender, having just a bit of muscle tone rolling over his arms and chest, and he was a very even and smooth caramel color from head to toe. His hair was like sheets of glossy black silk when he left it down, which was rare. Tonight he was in his element, and it was a high crown of spikes around his head, streaked through with various shades of blue and green.

He always wore the best clothes; fashion was his forte. The designers had started to notice him now that he was a successful club (cringe) owner, and now he got the best delivered straight to his door, so he could show it off when his establishment was packed. The top designers understood that he would accept nothing less than the best, even if he had to pay for it on his own. He was getting noticed by the media more and more, and was becoming a new fashion icon. He and Camille had started to get invited to parties and premieres, and he couldn't be happier. He loved the attention, and thought it was well-deserved, considering the amount of tie he put into his appearance every single day.

This particular evening was marked by a deep blue Burberry dress shirt, open at the collar and adorned with a loosely tied turquoise tie. His trademark black leather pants adorned his toned ass, and the look was completed by some brand new electric blue combat boots, a gift from the Heatherette boys.

On top of the glamorous wardrobe, his makeup was always immaculate. Tonight he was sporting dark blue eyeshadow laid over with a bit of silver glitter. A thick streak of black liquid liner, making a small wing on the end, and lots of mascara. His lips were his trademark nude with clear gloss. His lips were so full and luscious that Camille had convinced him lipstick overpowered their beauty.

The two remained in their seat, surveying the glamorous crowd of actors and models and socialites with a detached interest. Most of them just fed off the attention of the lesser mortals, waiting to throw themselves in front of something glitzy and rich. At other times it was rather annoying, but in an atmosphere like this, the specials thrived on it. And Magnus prided himself on the fact that New York's young elite, the Rhiannas and Jared Letos and Isabelle Lightwoods of the world, flocked to his establishment to wine and dine themselves in the company of each other.

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The idiot next to her said something she guessed was supposed to be funny, so she snickered in her best rehearsed way. It annoyed her to no end when someone laughed at their own jokes, and even more when they weren't remotely amusing. She sighed inwardly. New York hadn't changed much while she'd been in Milan. In fact, it looked like it had gotten worse. The men weren't any more considerate, or funny, or cute. It was slim pickings in this city for a man who knew how to treat a woman. The Italians were certainly lightyears ahead of this lot.

She hadn't really been thinking when she'd told the cab driver where to go. She'd just wanted to get out of the house where her mother was spouting orders to the help and her father was holed up in his office. When she was away, she was Isabelle Lightwood, 21 year old rising model. But when she came home, to her parents, she was Izzy, daddy's little virgin girl with the silver spoon sticking out of her mouth. It's not that she didn't appreciate her privileged upbringing; she just wished her parents would give her some credit, seeing as she had built her name for herself in the modeling world after dropping out of NYU. But no, they still thought they were owed everything for her success in the fashion world. She'd arrived home around 6:30 p.m., stayed about 10 minutes, then bolted. Her other two siblings weren't at home, so she decided to give herself a little time to see and be seen. She knew New York would welcome its native lovely sweetheart home with open arms.

What she didn't expect was to hit her usual hot spot, a large club where the usual young socialites liked to sit and be appreciated, and find it almost completely devoid of her usual crowd. She'd only been gone about four months, and already this place was deserted and the crowd had moved to a different watering hole. She was bored out of her skull.

She extricated herself from the booth, leaving jokester mid-sentence, and not apologizing for it. She swept through the teeming bodies and out the door, her waist length black hair lifting and swaying in the night air. She hailed a cab and climbed in.

"What's new around here? I've been away for a while, and it seems the crowd has moved on without me," she said absently.

"Oh I know. You've been in Italy doing the new Dolce stuff. I loved your work with Chanel last year, but I'm pretty sure you'll top it. You always do. It's good to have you back across the pond, Miss Lightwood," the cabbie said cheerfully. Isabelle smiled. It was good to be loved, even if it was from afar and never beneath the surface. "And as for what's new, that would be Cherry Bomb."

"Excuse me?" she asked.

"Cherry Bomb. It opened last month, and it's been booming ever since. Your brother has been tearing it up since it opened. If I didn't know better, I'd say he's half keeping it in business," he chuckled as he turned onto Houston.

She didn't even ask which brother he meant. If he was talking about a club-hopping, girl-hopping, cocktail downing pretty boy, he definitely wasn't talking about Alec. Jace could always be counted on to know where the party was. She didn't even know he was back in town from Boston. It pained her to think that the working class of New York knew more about her family's whereabouts than she did.

"Sounds good to me," she said. "Show me the way."

They drove up in front of a small doorway set into a gray brick wall, scarred with graffiti. She felt a little skeptical, but hoped that the book was more interesting than the cover. She handed the driver two Benjamin's, pocket change to her, and she slid off the cracked leather seat and made her way to the door, bypassing the mile long line to the right.

The bouncer was about to protest when he looked up at her face. "Good evening, Miss Isabelle. Welcome home. Jace is inside raising hell as usual," he said, lifting the velvet rope for her and ushering her inside. She gave him a forced smile. It pained and unnerved her this time, how people seemed to talk about her and her family like they were all old friends. That was the price you paid for limelight, she guessed.


	2. Chapter 2

She walked through the door and into a rather small room, all done in purple velvet and dark leather. The little dance floor in the center, at first glance, looked black. But whenever the lights hit it, it flashed multiple colors, as if glitter was underneath the glossy top. It was a cool touch in the otherwise dark room. One could get lost in the corners in here.

She made her way through the crowd to the bar on the other end of the room, dodging the well wishers and welcomers she didn't really know, but who knew her face and name as well as anyone did. Most of them were also famous in one way or another, or had rich parents that bought them time with the spotlight specials. There were a few exes of Isabelle's in the crowd, who also cordially acknowledged her return to the city. She smiled her way up to the bar, where a girl with pink hair and snakebites pierced through her lower lip turned to her and smiled, asking her what she'd like.

"I'll just take a cosmo, please," Isabelle said while still looking around and scanning the room for the familiar highlighted blonde that the bouncer had told her was in here.

"Sure thing, dollface," the bartender said, winking at her. Isabelle was used to getting passes made at her, but it was rare that it came from a girl. Rare, although not entirely nonexistent. When the girl was finished mixing and shaking, she strained Isabelle's drink into a martini glass and handed it to her.

"Put it on my brother's tab," she said. "And where is he by the way?"

The bartender knew just who she was talking about. After all, cameras loved them, and so did the working class. She pointed to a table about 20 feet away, and Isabelle turned to go in that direction.

She spotted him soon enough. He was, of course, surrounded by 5 or 6 Playboy wannabes, all jostling for his attention. He had a few empty glasses in front of him and was currently attempting to sweet talk the blonde seated next to him. It was useless; anyway, she'd sleep with him regardless of what he said just because of who he was. Isabelle was disgusted, as usual. She'd always thought he could do better than these mindless bimbos he surrounded himself with. He was buff, smart, and attractive, and yet he continued to go after the same girls all the time. She moved in to save him, though he probably wouldn't see it that way.

"Alright girls, playtime's over. Go find Hef and get a ride home. Out!" She shooed them out one by one while they all gave her death glares over their shoulders. She let them roll off of her like dust in the wind. She could care less what they thought of her.

"What the fuck, Izz?" was Jace's greeting. But he smiled and kissed her on the cheek, picking up his Patron and taking a long swig.

"Just thought you might like to save some brain cells. If you hang around with them too long, they might destroy them all," she said, downing half her cosmo in one gulp.

"I see that leaving all that fresh Italian meat across the pond has left you a tad bitchy, sis." This was their way. Jace and Isabelle worked in sarcasm as any artist might work with oils and acrylics. They were the best, and the rest of their family could sometimes barely stand them. They had a love hate relationship. Isabelle rolled her eyes, and let it slide.

"I didn't know you were already back in town," she said.

"Well, not for good. We still have a couple weeks of shooting left. But honestly, Boston is the most boring fuck of a town I have ever encountered. Why couldn't we have filmed in Miami or something? At least there's more than stuck up college chicks there." As usual, Jace evaluated a geographical location by its pussy potential.

"You know, you don't have to screw everything with tits in a ten mile radius wherever you are. You could actually sight-see and get to know the area. You know, actually give a damn that you're traveling to all these beautiful places?" she said, knowing what his answer would be before he even opened his mouth.

"I do sight-see. I do get to know the area. This general area, right here," he said, gesturing to his chest. "And sometimes here," this time gesturing to his crotch. She rolled her eyes again.

Jace wasn't really her brother, but he might as well be. He was her cousin, but her aunt and uncle died young. Isabelle's mother, Maryse, took Jace in out of love and sorrow for her sister. She and Robert had adopted him, giving Jace the Lightwood name when he was only a few months old, before Isabelle was even born. Maryse and Celine had been twins, and both of Maryse's biological children resembled them. They were pale with black hair and blue eyes. Isabelle tanned to get rid of the pale, and she was the only one who'd gotten dark eyes; they were almost black. Alec had her mother's and aunt's eyes, that piercing blue that so many people long for, but that her biological brother always seemed to want to hide.

Jace, on the other hand, didn't look anything like his mother, Celine. He looked like his father, Stephen. He was all bronze skin and sandy sun-highlighted hair, with luminous golden eyes. His face was angular and pretty, like Alec's, but unlike Alec, he always used it to his advantage. He had a very nice body, which he owed to his plethora of action films. He was quite successful for only being barely 22, but he liked to flaunt it. Isabelle supposed he deserved it.

"Well, just be sure you get tested regularly. Usually porn stars and Playboy bunnies don't really take too many precautions," she said. He laughed. "So where's Alec? Has he called you?" she asked.

"Yeah, he called earlier this morning. He's still in LA at training camp. Couldn't get a flight out until tomorrow. I guess they're running them ragged after the loss to D.C. You can tell he's still bitter, but he'll get over it. He needs to get here and soak up some of this extra pussy that's flooded in!" He exclaimed, sweeping his hand in a grand gesture, indicating the rest of the room.

Isabelle tried not to show her disappointment, knowing that Alec wouldn't be home until late tomorrow. They'd finally all gotten their schedules synchronized, and had been able to all come home for the same couple of weeks. That was like an act of Congress, considering they were all so successful in their own endeavors. Isabelle decided she wouldn't be a whiney baby, missing her brother all night. She would have fun with her adopted brother, and enjoy her first night back in the U.S.

"So what's the deal with this place? I heard it's only been open a couple of months. It seems to be doing pretty damn good. Who owns it?" she asked, thinking he would probably say one of the familiar two or three names that had the money from the Manhattan nightclub scene divided evenly between them.

"I'm not really sure. Something Bane, I think. He's usually around here somewhere, though I kind of try to steer clear of him," Jace said with a nervous look.

"Why's that?" Isabelle asked, curious what on earth could make her action hero brother look like that.

"Well, for starters, he's a little fruity for me," he said.

"You know, in my world, when you say things like 'fruity' it usually translates to 'nice wardrobe, personal hygiene, and treats women right'," Isabelle quipped.

"Well they treat women 'right'," he said, putting quotey fingers on the last word, "because they would rather be your best friend than sleep with you. If fruity translates to that, I'm glad no one uses that to describe me. I'd much rather sleep with the girl and be done with it." Isabelle was not surprised at this remark.

"Whatever, Jace. You're a pig, you know that? Is he here tonight?" she asked.

"Yeah. He's over there in the corner. Him, I'm afraid of, but the girl I'd like to bone till dawn. She's smokin'!" he said.

"Yeah, she's also plastic. I had a miniature of her when I was eight. Seriously, Jace, elevate your standards a little. You know, you could do the cougar thing. It worked out well for Ashton," she said, and he moved to swat her on the shoulder playfully. "Okay," she laughed. "Maybe not."

She looked over to where he'd pointed and saw the man he was talking about. He was _definitely_ gay, no doubt about it. No straight man put that much effort into his appearance. On the contrary, most straight men went the "just-rolled-out-of-bed" route, opting to leave their clothes half unbuttoned and falling off their bodies. Jace was a prime example of this with his white Hollister shirt unbuttoned to show off his toned pectorals, his faded surfer jeans hanging low on his hips and his Steve Madden boots.

The man across the room, however, looked like he'd just gotten out of four hours of professional hair and makeup. Isabelle was slightly jealous. She'd seen work on the runway that looked shitty compared to his face. His makeup suited his face, accentuating the shape of his eyes and mouth. His clothes hung loosely on his slim frame, but also made him look substantial instead of slight. He had on skin tight leather pants, too. That was a bold move for any man. She mentally applauded him. She was also struck by the strong desire to talk to him and get some of his makeup and wardrobe secrets. But she stayed put and had a fun time with her middle brother, wishing the eldest was here, even though he'd probably hate it.

* * *

**Song for this section: Fell on Black Days by Soundgarden (This is kind of Alec's taste in music, while the music playing in Cherry Bomb is Magnus' taste, obviously)**

He barely made it up the steps of his flat. He was absolutely exhausted. Coach thought they needed to be punished after the 3-0 loss to D.C. United last week. He supposed Coach was right. Still, he was sure some of his leg muscles had given up on him, going into hibernation. He could hardly get them to put one foot in front of the other. When he reached his bedroom, he dropped his duffel full of gear and flopped down on his bed.

He was glad he'd made himself shower before he left the locker room today. He usually waited until he'd gotten home to shower, considering the inevitable blush that always descended when he even thought about the rest of the team being naked in the same room with him. He didn't like the feelings it called up. Feelings that should not be had by a male in a male locker room, he thought. But today, he'd made himself do it because he knew when he got to this moment, on his bed, he wouldn't be able to get back up for the rest of the night.

Alec awoke in the same position from the night before, still fully clothed in jeans and a black t-shirt, his LA Galaxy warm-up jacket, and boots. He felt refreshed, though, and ready for the day. He'd showered just before putting on these clothes, so he figured they were okay to travel in anyway. He was glad he'd took the time to pack the day before, before he'd gone to practice. He was excited to see his family, but mostly he was excited to get away from LA and all its pretty-ness for a while. Not that New York would be much different, but then again, one could hope.

He heaved himself off the bed, checking his pockets for his keys and cell phone, both of which were still there. His flight was in 3 hours, but it took an hour in traffic to get to LAX, and then another hour and a half to make it through security, if he was lucky. He'd had a good night's sleep and he was ready to go. He grabbed his second duffel, white with the blue and gold LA Galaxy logo on the side. Alec didn't need to pack much, as he only ever wore t-shirts and sweaters with jeans, so all he had was the one bag. He'd save time not having to check bags.

He slung his bag over his shoulder, grabbing his iPod as he walked out the door. He said goodbye to his best friend in LA. She was a black on black Aston Martin DB9 that he bought with his first paycheck after signing with the team. He closed the garage, a rare luxury in LA, and looked back one last time to make sure she was securely protected.

He loved that car. Not in the same way most men might love their cars, but in a co-dependent way. The car was his means of escape. When he was feeling the crushing weight of reality on his shoulders, his secrets piling up and threatening to consume him, he just jumped in and gunned it, slipping away to the desert or the valley or wherever the powerful cylinders took him. He could breathe when he was inside. He sometimes talked to the steering wheel, unloading his problems on the dashboard and feeling the weight lift for whatever fleeting moments he could afford. He was looking forward to seeing his family, it was true. But he definitely not looking forward to the crushing, boxed-in feeling he got when he was home. He felt like a caged animal with no means of escape except cabs and traffic jams and bars. He supposed it was worth it to see Izzy and Jace again. Not that he hadn't seen them on multiple billboards around town anyway. But they never did the real things justice.

He hailed a cab and threw his bag in the trunk, directing the driver to LAX. He turned on his iPod and shoved his earbuds in, turning on Soundgarden. A fitting song for the journey ahead.

When he reached the airport, he threw money at the driver and bolted out of the car, grabbing his bag. He already felt stuffy and boxed in. He sighed and made his way through to the security line. A short hour later (he got lucky that the line was rather short, for LAX), he was making his way through the terminal to his gate.

"Excuse me! Excuse me! Wait!" he heard a small voice calling to him from a couple of yards behind. He turned to see a young boy, about 8 or 9 years old, running after him and panting. His father, Alec assumed, was shuffling to keep up.

Alec smiled as the boy came near. He was wearing the Galaxy's dark blue Away jersey with the gold trim, the team logo over his heart. He was still trying to catch his breath.

"Hi there, little bro," he said cheerfully. He was grateful for little things like this that seemed to make his life worthwhile. "What can I do for you?"

"You're Alexander Lightwood, aren't you?" the boy asked with a twinkle in his eye.

"I sure am," Alec said. He didn't even wince when the boy used his full name. He expected he would. Jace was the only one in the family that used his nickname in his professional career, simply because he hated his real name so much.

The boy's face lit up like he was meeting the Pope or something. "Couldâ€¦could youâ€¦could you sign my jersey?" he stuttered, all of a sudden star struck.

"Sure, man. You got a marker?" the boy nodded and looked at his dad. The older man handed Alec a sharpie. Alec knelt down to the boy's level and signed his full name right above the LA Galaxy logo on the boy's chest. He thought the boy was about to faint from happiness. He couldn't help but smile, despite his dark mood.

"Thanks, Mr. Lightwood," the boy's father said. "He's a huge fan, as you can tell," he chuckled. "Sorry to bother you, if you're on your way somewhere."

"No it's fine. I'm headed home, actually. New York," he said.

"Well, have a safe trip. It was very nice to meet you, sir," the dad said.

"Thank you so much, Mr. Lightwood! And trust me, they shouldn't have called that yellow card on you in the 28th minute against United. I was so mad!" the little boy exclaimed.

"Thanks, man. What's your name?" Alec asked.

"Max! My name's Max," the boy said, excited that his hero knew his name now.

"Well, Max, keep up the home front. Maybe we'll come back and beat the Burn this year. We lost in Dallas last year, but maybe home field advantage will have some effect this time?" he said.

"Of course! The Burn will burn this year!" Max said with a determined look.

"Okay, let the man get to his flight, son." Turning back to Alec, "Thanks again. He'll cherish that jersey forever now. You're his hero."

"Oh, it's no problem. I'm happy to have fans after last week," he laughed. "Bye, Max!" he said as the boy and his father turned away in the other direction, the boy still gushing about this encounter.

Alec was momentarily gratified that the back of Max's jersey, for once in Alec's life, didn't say Beckham across the top. He liked his teammate, but it was nice to see Lightwood and the number 32 across the back for a change. He smiled and made his way to his gate, boarding the plane for home.


	3. Chapter 3

Ten hours and two layovers later, Alexander Lightwood set food on hard ground at La Guardia. He sat up, earbuds still in, and waited for his turn to get up, grab his bag, and depart. It took a while, with everyone shuffling around and grabbing bags from the overhead bins, but finally he was out in the terminal. With his white duffel bag slung over his shoulder, he made his way to the doors amid the mid-day airport hustle and bustle. It was the end of the summer, so it was rather crowded with the tourist crowd going home and the NYU, CUNY, and SUNY students coming back.

He was stopped a couple of times to sign autographs, and to be told that his sister came through here just yesterday. He didn't really mind having fans or anything, but sometimes it was odd that strangers knew so much about him and his family. But that was the price you paid for limelight. Not that he actually _wanted_ to be famous; he just always wanted to play for one of the best clubs in American soccer, and with that came a famous teammate, so naturally some fame rubbed off on the rest of the team. He would never acknowledge it, but his own fans didn't really care that he played with David Beckham; he was an amazing player in his own right. That's why he _had_ fans. But Alec chose to remain as aloof as possible. He didn't really like attention.

He stepped outside the doors, and went to hail a cab. Suddenly, he spotted a familiar face and half sighed, half smiled. Hodge, his parents' chauffeur/butler/right hand man, was standing next to his parents' Bentley a few yards away waving to him. Alec grudgingly made his way through the crowd, plastering a smile on his face before he hugged Hodge, the older man welcoming him home. Alec liked Hodge, but he hadn't been planning on a big to-do ride home in a hundred thousand dollar car. A cab was just fine. The car only mattered if _he_ was driving.

"Well, look at you! You're taller than I remember, boy. And huge. You're not getting into those performance enhancing things are you?" Hodge joked. He was exaggerating. Alec was about 6'2", and had a typical soccer player's body. Strong, muscular calves and thighs, abs that were toned to a six pack, but weren't very big, and cut pectorals. His arms were muscular, but nowhere near bulky. He tended to think he was rather slight, next to his teammates.

But he knew Hodge was just reacting to the fact that he hadn't seen Alec in quite some time. It had been two years since Alec signed with the Galaxy and left for LA. Since Jace's and Isabelle's careers required them to spend considerable time in California anyway, and his parents could afford to fly out to see him during the season, he never really had the need to come to New York. Now he was 23 years old and finally stepping foot back into the town he'd thought he'd left for good. He sighed inwardly again.

"How are Jace and Isabelle? Did they make it home okay?" he asked as Hodge took his bag and put it in the trunk of the car.

"Oh you know Jace. He's been partying since he got back last week. And Isabelle arrived yesterday evening. She was in the house all of ten minutes; I suspect Italy didn't get rid of her disdain for your mother and father. She was rather sullen that you weren't home yet when she got there," he said warmly. Alec and his sister were very close, and sometimes it pained him that they saw so little of each other. Isabelle had been in Milan for four months, so they'd only been able to talk on the phone occasionally. When he found out he was going to have to wait another day to fly home, she'd been on the plane so he couldn't get hold of her. He'd told Jace, hoping he wouldn't be an idiot and forget to let her know.

And just like that, just by thinking his name, all the feelings Alec had pushed down came flooding back. Jace. But that was wrong. Jace was practically his brother, he was his _cousin_ for crying out loud. But beautiful Jace always set Alec on edge. His honey hair and golden eyes, and his laugh. _Ugh_, Alec thought to himself. He would rid himself once and for all of these stupid feelings. It was one thing to like guys in general, but another thing entirely to have a crush on your brother, just like half the teenage girls in America. He was so pathetic.

He climbed in the backseat and let his head fall back. He would get through this.

When the Bentley pulled up in front of the Lightwood home, Isabelle was the first to run out and greet him. She barely let him get out of the car before she jumped up in his arms. He caught her and hugged her close. Something about Isabelle always made him feel at ease. He felt like he could be himself around her, tell her anything. Well, anything except _that_.

"Oh my God! I missed you so much you fucker! Why did you have to wait another day? You said you'd be home yesterday!" she exclaimed as he set her down. Next to her, he felt huge and bulky. She was tall, 5'10", but very thin, like most models he supposed. She watched her weight very closely, always obsessing over the labels on food, only eating organic. But that was Isabelle, and he loved her.

"Well, if you watched sports you'd know. We lost to D.C. and Coach was riding our asses. We had an extra day of practice, so I couldn't get a flight till this morning. But I don't blame you for not watching _that_ game. We sucked royally. We weren't really on our best game, and I was all sluggish 'cause of my knee, and"

Isabelle was staring at him with a funny look. "Alec, really. Do you think I can keep up with your sports talk? Seriously. You're home now, so let's talk about fun stuff! Like, oh my God there's this new club in town called Cherry Bomb. Me and Jace were there last night and it was amazing. You'd like it. It's all dark and mysterious and you can blend right into the walls if you want to," she teased. He knew that Isabelle knew he hated crowds and loud music and _dancing_.

But he noticed something in her speech that made him smile big. It was the first time in a while he'd been called Alec. To the outside world, he was always Alexander Lightwood, number 32. He was Alec _only_ to his family, just as Isabelle was Izzy _only_ to the family. Jace had dropped his full name a long time ago, and had gone by his initials when he was younger. But one day Isabelle had called him Jace in an interview and it stuck. Jace was fine with it; preferred it actually. But when it came to Alec, his nickname was only for people he loved dearly. And with that, he immediately felt at home.

After he'd gone inside and unpacked his things, he and Isabelle were sitting in the den watching T.V. when his blonde brother came bounding in. Alec had seen his latest movie, and it hadn't done him justice. He looked even more gorgeous in person. This made Alec cringe inwardly. But he was also glad to see his brother. He'd missed him on a brotherly level, too. But it was these conflicting feelings that always threatened to pull him under. All of a sudden he was wishing for his car back home. He didn't have anyone to talk to like that here.

"What's up, bro? Long time no see!" Jace said, plopping down in an immaculate white armchair with a bag of Funyuns.

"Yeah, I know. It's weird to be here after so long. Mom redecorated," he observed, looking around the room; anywhere but at Jace.

"Yeah she got some fag to do it for her. He knows his shit, though. These chairs are the bomb," he said, crunching on a ring.

Alec's head popped up at the word. His face turned red. He tried to dispel the conflicting anger and embarrassment that erupted inside him. He tried to tell himself that Jace's use of the word was a good thing. It implied that he didn't know it applied to someone else in the room. Alec tried to comfort himself with that.

"Yeah, and she'll probably murder you when she sees you eating on them. You're not the golden boy in this house, you know," Isabelle retorted.

"Oh, that just goes to show how much you know. I happen to be the golden boy of the world, dear sister. Look at me. I'm young, sexy, and well _golden,_" he chuckled sarcastically.

"And when Alec wipes that look of disgust off his face and uses his power kick on you, you'll be young and broken and _red_," Izzy returned. Alec laughed despite himself.

And just like that, they weren't a famous soccer player, an action movie hero, and a successful model. They were Alec and Jace and Izzy, siblings sitting around watching T.V. and laughing like they were teenagers again.

* * *

**Song for this section: From Yesterday by 30 Seconds to Mars (It's the song the band is playing, and the rendition is rather good, btw. *fistpump*)**

She sat riveted in her seat, watching the band work their magic on the crowd. They were singing her second favorite 30STM song, and her best friend was doing a fantastic job channeling Jared. She watched with interest as his fingers moved across the strings, down the neck, caressing the fret board. She'd always wished she could play, and he'd offered to teach her a couple of times, but she'd always chickened out when her fingers started to get calloused. She complained that her fingers ached so bad she couldn't draw; he relented because, well, that was her livelihood just as music was his.

So she settled for watching him. He'd grown up a lot recently, she thought to herself. She'd just been too busy with shows and selling new works that she hadn't noticed. He'd lost the glasses in favor of contacts (even though she disapproved of the gray color. He said it was cool, she said it hid his best features, which were a rich chocolate brown). He'd slimmed down, lost all his baby fat. About time, as he'd just turned 21. He still retained his teenage uniform, though. Old Nirvana t-shirts and faded, ripped jeans over beat up Doc Martins. But it suited him and the lifestyle he led, playing in bars and pubs and other small gigs.

The Boys In The Band had recorded one album, the first copy of which Simon gave to Clary on the day they hit shelves. For a while, it was the only copy off the shelves. But they were steadily gaining credit. They now had three singles getting airplay on the underground stations, and had an offer from a music video director for their latest one. They were doing rather well for a bunch of boys from Brooklyn that decided they were going to start a band one day.

As the song ended, the crowd in the small Brooklyn bar erupted into applause. Clary smiled, clapping along with them. The frontman's eyes went straight to her and shot her a huge smile, like she was the only one in the room. She felt herself blush slightly, but pushed it down. He was just proud and wanted to make sure his best friend knew it.

She couldn't understand how he did it, got up there every night in front of people who might either love him or hate him, and subject himself to artistic judgment head on. She was proud of her work, but she never allowed herself to be directly associated with it. Her paintings were displayed in several galleries around Manhattan, but each of them was signed with a pseudonym: Clarissa Fairchild. But 20 year old Clary Fray had been told by more than one gallery owner that sooner or later she'd have to come out of hiding, because her work was getting better and was getting noticed by more and more buyers.

As the band thanked the crowd and descended off the stage, she stood to welcome the hug she knew was coming.

"Thanks for coming, Clary. I know you still have to finish a lot of stuff for that studio in Manhattan," Simon said as he let her go.

"Simon, you know I'll always do my best to be at every show I can. And this one was basically in my own backyard," she said, smiling. "So there was really no way of getting out of it."

"True that, bro," he said with a laugh. This was how it was with them. They were like siblings, and had been since they were about 9. She was very proud of her best friend, and he was proud of her. They supported each other's accomplishments and shared the occasional loving moment, but that was where it ended.

More than once her parents had told her that one day that boy was going to come to the door and be down on one knee. But she just couldn't see Simon that way. He was her friend, that nerdy little Jewish kid with glasses that could barely sing a note. Even now that he was a successful musician, and very attractive in a grungy, I-don't-care musician kind of way, she still saw Simon as practically a brother. Every now and then he would do or say something that was a little odd, considering the confines of their relationship, but she would brush it off as being not what it seemed. Little did she know.

* * *

When he was on stage, he only saw her. He always sang and played right to her. She was the only streak of color in his otherwise dark world. From her slight, pale frame to her fiery hair to her delicate artist's hands, she was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen.

He'd known her since they were kids, but one day it had hit him head on: her beauty. He longed to tell her how he felt, how he had felt for the past five or six years now. But he was so afraid it would ruin the friendship they had cultivated. Wouldn't it turn awkward? Wouldn't they not be able to talk about the same things, interact in the same carefree way? That's what he was afraid of. Part of what he loved about Clary was their level of comfort with each other.

They had an unspoken language most of the time, knowing what the other was thinking with just a look. Clary's father, Luke, called them Mulder and Scully, because they were co-dependent on each other to the point of near insanity. Or it could have been that he was tall, lanky, and brunette, while she was short, snarky and redheaded. But he suspected it was a little of both.

When he hugged her, he found himself holding a little too tight. He let go, hoping she hadn't noticed. She usually didn't; he slipped up a lot and she never said anything. He'd look at her a little too long, or hold her a little too tight, or grab for her hand when the moment didn't really warrant it, at least between friends. But she never called him out on it. He had a feeling she didn't even suspect. He found that hard to believe, considering he was slowly being consumed by his love for her.


	4. Chapter 4

He lay in bed, his iPod dock letting out the sweet sounds of Leona Lewis. He sang along every now and then. Then he would remember how his mother used to tell him he'd be a singer someday with his powerful, emotional voice, and he'd stop. He couldn't do that anymore. That was something that reminded him of her way too much.

He got up, reaching under his bed. He pulled out his most prized possession, above all his designer clothes and his glitter and makeup. The album full of photos of his beautiful mother. He took it out occasionally, when he was feeling particularly alone. The pages were filled with happy memories, the only happy memories he had anymore. They were all from before "the incident" as he liked to refer to it. He couldn't fight the images that came bounding up when he thought about it.

When Magnus was younger, he'd lived in London with his parents. His father was French, but his mother was from an old New York family, that much he knew. But they never talked about being rich, or really ever had much money to spend. However, it didn't really matter. They had an okay life. Magnus went to a prestigious school, his father was a professor at the local college, and his mother worked as an event planner for lots of local charities. When he was young, Magnus was blind to the real problems that were going on right under their roof.

One day when he was about 14, Magnus started noticing little changes in his parents' dynamic. His mother told him much later that they'd been going on for a while, but that she and his father had gotten sloppier at hiding it. They had fallen out of love with each other. By the time Magnus was 16, they could barely stand the sight of each other, and they didn't try to hide it anymore. Magnus' mother found out that his father had been seeing one of his students for a few months. She blew up at him, and he called her a shriveled old woman, which was preposterous. Magnus' mother was the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen. He'd gotten his lustrous hair and perfectly shaped eyes from her, along with his caramel complexion.

After that, he supposed his mother thought she deserved a little revenge. At one of her events, she stumbled upon a very attractive young man. She said he'd made her laugh and made her feel beautiful again. Magnus could tell she loved him. She'd changed; the fire had been re-awakened in her. He was happy for her, but he was also afraid his father would find out.

His father was the type of man that thought the rules didn't apply to him. Yes, he could sleep with whoever he wanted, but his wife was bound by the law to obey and honor him. As long as they were married, she was a prisoner to him. Sooner or later, he found out about her little love affair. Everything turned to shit then.

Magnus had been away in America at the Florida State when the letter came. It was from an estate manager back in London, telling him he needed to come home immediately. There was a plane ticket enclosed, and he followed the order.

When he arrived in London, he was sent to the offices of the man who'd sent him the letter. This man told him that his mother was dead, and that his father was in prison for her murder. He didn't hear much after that. Later, at the trial, he'd found out the story.

His father had waited until he knew his mother and her lover were at the other man's home. He'd taken his hunting rifle, and snuck in a window. He found them in the living room, watching old movies and laughing together. He butted the barrel against the back of the man's head, at the base of his skull, and fired. He never saw it coming. That was his plan, he'd said. For his wife to see, and know what was coming for her. He'd called her a cheating, ungrateful cunt, and shot her in the chest. Then he'd left out the front door. He hadn't gotten far when the police picked him up; neighbors had heard the shots.

Magnus was called to testify to his father's sanity. He didn't know what to do. He loved his father, but he knew he'd been wrong. He told the judge that his father and mother had grown angry with each other, and constantly threatened one another with divorce and things like that, but that his father was completely sane. This made his father very mad, and made Magnus very glad that the man was behind bars now, so he couldn't get at his son. To this day, Magnus has constant conflicting feelings about how he might have betrayed his father; but he knew he'd done the right thing.

After the trial was over, Magnus had dropped out of school. He couldn't focus anymore. He didn't want to go home, either. He didn't know what he was going to do. His blessing came in the form of an ordinary phone call that changed his life. The estate planner called to tell him that his mother had a will, and everything that was hers, she left to him. Magnus said that was all well and good, but there wasn't much anyway, so he didn't see how it could help. The man informed him that she'd been extremely careful in hiding something from his father.

The man told Magnus that the old New York family his mother came from was the Vanderbilts. Her grandfather had left her close to 14 million dollars that she had saved and put into a different account under her maiden name when she was 18. It was now Magnus'.

He was floored. He knew exactly what he wanted to do with it. He said goodbye to London and his beloved mother, and flew to New York. He bought a loft in Brooklyn that didn't remind him of home in the least. He decorated it with fine furnishings, but kept it eclectic. He'd never liked the stuffiness of London, so he steered clear of pretentious decorating. He bought a new wardrobe. He started vamping up his makeup. He re-invented himself. He discovered that his true self had been hiding for a long time, and now he finally felt right.

He'd never told his parents he was bisexual. It wasn't that he tried to hide it, he just never brought it up and he suspected they were glad not knowing. He'd had the occasional fling in high school, after he'd discovered SoHo. He lost his virginity to a guy at 16, and it had been horrible. The next few times, it got a little better. Once he left home and went to New York, he immersed himself in the dating scene. He slept with 5 or 6 guys and girls, all incredibly gorgeous, wannabe models or actors, but he never found quite what he was looking for. He kept dating, though, just for the fun of it. He hated being alone.

He'd met Camille at a party for some designer or whatever. It turned out they had a lot of the same interests: fashion, Mae West, crowds, and a good glass of red wine, among other things. One night he unloaded his sob story on her. It had been her idea to open the lounge. She told him that he should put his money to good use, and in a way that he could enjoy. Sure, he gave some to charity and such, but he liked the idea of creating his own ideal atmosphere and inviting the socialites of New York to partake. When they'd gone to scout the building, The Runaways were playing on the radio in his purple 911 Turbo. And thus, Cherry Bomb was born.

He gazed down at his mother's image, copied over and over on the pages.

"I hope you're proud of me, mom," he said. "I tried my best. I'm sorry you're not here to enjoy it."

Later on, before the lounge opened for the night, he was sitting at the bar talking to Katinka. He'd noticed her from a mile away with her neon pink hair. He always wondered how she kept it so vivid. She was very pretty, and he loved the piercings. They'd tried to sleep together, and it had just ended up awkward. They were better off friends, they both acknowledged. When he opened his place, he remembered that she'd said she knew how to tend bar. He was sold, as far as that went. She was good, he had to admit. She could service about 10 people at once without ever writing anything down. She just laid all the money in a row and typed it into the register when she finally got a free moment, never forgetting what each pile of bills was for. She was amazing. And she was also bi.

Magnus didn't like to say he was bi, really. He liked guys a lot more than he liked girls. In fact, he hadn't even thought about being with a girl since Katinka a year ago. He missed the feeling of a hard chest and strong arms around him. The only two times he'd been in love, it had been with guys. He never really felt anything but faint lust with girls. He supposed he was really gay, with bi tendencies. He never really liked all the baggage that came with girls. He never felt alive with them like he did with a man.

As the night wore on, and the time came to open up, he retreated to his office, which was more of an overgrown dressing room, complete with a vanity and closet full of clothes. He put on one of his best outfits, donned a lot more eyeliner, and dusted a bit of glitter into his hair. He took one last look in the mirror and cocked his lopsided smile. He was dead sexy.

* * *

**Song for this section: Ramalama by Roisin Murphy (Playing in the lounge. Can you tell that Magnus likes kind of off kilter music? I LOVE it!)**

After working the crowd for a bit, Magnus and Camille posted up at their usual corner booth to survey the attendees.

"It's a little slow tonight," Magnus observed as he sipped his trademark blue cocktail.

"It's only ten. Give it a little time," Camille said. She was right, he supposed. The place didn't usually start hopping until about midnight.

"Whatever. I'm convinced there's going to be zero eye candy to work with tonight," he said with a sigh.

"Oh, don't be melodramatic. There's bound to be a few juicy pieces in this crowd. You just have to know where to look," she countered. "For instance, look in the far corner," she pointed.

"I don't see anyone of interest," he said without even looking. He wanted to be sullen for a little bit.

"I'm serious, Magnus. Check out the import over there," she prodded. He looked up and searched in the direction she pointed.

"Is that?" he trailed off, overcome by shallow lust.

"Igor Dolgatschew. Luscious lips, washboard abs and all," Camille said, smiling to herself at her boyspotting abilities.

"Damn, he's even sexier in person," Magnus observed.

"I've heard he can't speak very much English, though."

"I really could care less about speaking. Why waste those incredible lips wrapping them around words when they could be wrapping around my cock?"

"You know he's not really gay, right? It's Dennis Grabosch that's gay in real life," Camille informed him.

"I don't think he's completely straight. He plays gay way too well and he enjoys it way too much. I could help him out of the closet," Magnus said with an evil smile, even though he had no intention of ambushing the German star.

"I'm pretty sure he's straight," she said, pointing to his left. Her reasoning was solidified by the way he hung on the girl next to him like she was air to breathe. Magnus sighed.

"I'm convinced I'm never going to find a good one. All the cute ones are either straight or, if they're gay, they're basket cases. Too emotional or too obsessed with themselves. I'm vain enough for two people; I don't need to keep some other narcissistic little shit around just to fuck me. I need a real man in my life." He knew he was whining, but he couldn't help it.

"Oh sweetie, you need to lose that mentality. Mama always said never let a man define you, and I'm pretty sure she knew what she was talking about. You just need to give it time. In the meantime, if you're feeling lonely, find yourself a little toy to play with. Flesh and blood or battery and plastic, take your pick. Both work out about the same for me," she said, taking another sip.

They continued the rest of the night in the same way, discussing who in the crowd was drop dead gorgeous, and who was nearing the end of their career and just wouldn't acknowledge it. They laughed and joked, and Magnus momentarily forgot his love woes.


	5. Chapter 5

She sat behind her easel, trying to think what was missing from the image in front of her. It was a picture of her mother, who'd passed away about five years ago. She'd been an artist also, and had passed the talent to her daughter. Clary's father had loved her dearly, and sometimes she was a little worried about him. He would retreat to his room from time to time, looking at pictures of their wedding day and crying silent tears. But he never cried when he looked at Clary's works. They always made him beam with love and remembrance.

This particular image was a reproduction of a picture from her mother's younger days, before she'd met Luke. It was one of those stupid Olan Mills portraits from the early 80s, the ones that everyone seemed to staring off into space in. Apparently that was cool at the time. It was faded and washed out, but her mother's face still made the dumb idea of a portrait look like a picture of a goddess. Clary's take on it made the image all blues and grays, while her mom shone with her fiery hair and milky skin in the center. It was beautiful, she had to say.

"Make up yo' mind, decide to walk with me around the lake tonight around the lake tonight by my siiiide," came the familiar voice behind the easel, across the room. He even sang the guitar parts with a little twang in his voice, playing air guitar as he did so. She had to smile to herself.

"My blushin' briiide! My lover, beee my lover yeaaahhh!" Simon screamed. He even made screaming sound good. She was tempted to turn off the music and let him do it himself; it would sound just as good as with backup music.

"You guys should cover that one too," she said. It was purely selfish, her request. She's the one that had requested From Yesterday the other night, simply because she loved to hear Simon's voice sing it. The Toadies song was even better. Simon had a Kurt kind of voice; that kind that was scratchy and grungy and a little off tune sometimes, but that always ended up making it sound even better. It always sounded full of feeling and she absolutely loved it.

"Yeah, that would be cool. But, ya know, we've got to do some of our shit sometimes," he laughed. That was true. Their music was getting a lot of airplay and they were finally to the point where some people in the audience would sing along with their obscure singles.

While he was in a good mood, she thought she should broach the subject that had been weighing on her mind. "Simon?" she began.

"Que pasa, chica?" he quipped without so much as an attempt at the right accent.

"Well, I was thinking that maybe, um, you would like to go to the show tomorrow? Maybe as moral support?"

"Real funny, Fray. What makes you ask, anyway? You know I'm coming, regardless," he said, a little surprised.

"Well it starts at, like, five. It's still daylight then. And I personally haven't seen you set foot outside before eight in a long ass time. I swear you're like a vampire sometimes," she said, not altogether joking.

"Oh yeah. That's me. I'm a bloodsucking creature of the night. I might as well be. I could get a lot more chicks that way," he said sarcastically.

"Sure you could. Steal some of Edward's fans. Start gelling your hair and wearing glitter and pretentious pea coats, and the girls will come running," she said.

"Oh _hell_ no, missy. If I'm going to be a vampire, I'm Eric fucking Northman. Jesus, I have to have fangs at least. Edward's such a pussy, and he doesn't even get all the fun parts of being a vamp. He doesn't suck on girls' necks OR have fangs to scare people with. That must blow."

"But he's so pretty," she said, chuckling.

"You've said that about Eric, too, remember?" She had to concede that she had. "And at least he's a Viking. That's badass. So I'm him," he said with finality. She snickered, going back to her painting.

"But seriously, you'll come?" she pressed.

"Of course I will. Wouldn't miss it even for free Ben and Jerry's," he said, getting out of his chair and coming over to admire her work. "That looks really good, Clary," he observed, looking back and forth between the painting and the original. "Looks just like her."

"I miss her, Simon," Clary said suddenly, a tear welling up in her eye. Simon reached over and gingerly wiped it away before it got too far down her cheek.

"Me too. I miss her PB and J's. Way better than my mom's," he said, smiling and trying to make her do the same. It worked. Clary laid her head on his shoulder, then thought better of it. There was that awkward feeling again. They quickly stepped a few inches apart. "You nervous about tomorrow?"

"Of course I am. It's the first time I'll have to actually be there and acknowledge my own work. I don't like people putting my face with my work. It makes me feel like they're judging me all the time. When it's anonymous, it's not so bad." She was rambling out of nervousness for the coming night. "Plus," she added, "the own invited a bunch of Hollywood types. Simon, there will be famous people looking at my art. Criticizing it. Oh em gee. I think I'm going to puke."

"_I'll_ puke if you start talking in text-speak. It'll be fine, Fray. Don't sweat it. And if there happens to be a riot over your awesome paintings, and punches start to get thrown, I can calm them all with my awesome vocal skills," he said, teasing. "Is this one going in the show?"

"No, I don't think so. I think I'm going to give it to Dad for their anniversary," she mused. "It's a little personal for the show."

"That's a good idea. He'll love it, I know it."

"Thanks, Simon," she said.

"Anytime, half-pint," he returned, smiling.

* * *

**Song for this section: U & Ur Hand by Pink (haha, the point of view of Clary. Hehehe. You'll see lol.)**

"This is soooo going to blow," Jace said, dreading the night ahead. He hated art. It was so boring, and he really didn't get it. Something was good art when so-and-so big wig said it was. He didn't know what it had to do with him. But yet, Isabelle was dragging him to it. He was just mildly glad that she'd conned Alec into going also. His brother was just a squeamish about these cocktail party types of things as he was. But Jace's reason for hating it was quite different from Alec's: there was hardly ever any good snatch to be had at these stuck up shindigs.

"Oh shut up," Isabelle said. "You need some culture in your life. Quit being a shallow juicehead and suck it up. At least Alec's being a good sport," she said as she put the finishing touches on her makeup in the mirror in her oversized bathroom.

"No, he hates it too. He's just too good-natured to tell you. I, on the other hand, have no qualms about expressing my disgust with the whole thing," he said, examining his nails and looking in the mirror, fixing his Armani tie. He had to admit, he looked damn good. It's a shame it would be wasted on stuck up old people, most likely. He'd gotten an invitation to the art show in the UES, but he'd put it in the circular file as soon as he saw what it was. He had no business at an event like that.

"Patience is a virtue, you know. You never know who could be there. Once again, I think you should really give the cougar thing a shot," she said. He picked up a pillow off the bench by her dressing table and threw it at her. It bounced off her shoulder and she gave him a dirty look. He rolled his eyes and went to go find Alec.

He turned the corner down the hallway and made his way to the guestroom. Alec didn't really have a room here, considering he hadn't been home in two years. But he knew his eldest brother didn't mind the small room. He was rather reclusive and didn't pack much, so it was just about right.

Since the dress code for tonight was semi-formal, Alec had to borrow one of Jace's suits since he hadn't packed any. Jace had laughed at his expression when Isabelle informed him he would be wearing a suit tonight. Alec hated dressing up. He was such a jock, always dressing in t-shirts and jeans and tennis shoes. Jace, on the other hand, kept a steady supply of tuxes and suits for premieres, parties and such. He didn't really understand why Alec hadn't bought at least one suit while he was here; knowing their parents, they'd be going to a lot of these gala type things. In New York, you never knew when you'd need a good stuffy outfit.

As he walked into the room, he admired his older brother with a smirk. Jace Lightwood was known for his action films, and thus for his buff body. Alec, on the other hand, had a soccer player's slighter, more athletic build. Thus, Jace's slightly shiny, charcoal gray Carolina Herrera suit looked a little too baggy on him. But this was what they had to work with, and there hadn't been time to take it in. But that didn't seem to be the problem.

"I know you hate this as much as I do, so why don't we gang up on her?" Jace asked as Alec frantically smoothed his hair in the mirror and kept looking himself up and down with apprehension.

"Because you know how much she likes these things. Gives her a chance to show off all that stuff she got in Italy. And you never know, maybe we'll like it," he said, but Jace could tell he didn't mean it.

"Oh, come on bro! Let's skip out early at least. Go grab some drinks. I know this new club in town, the girls are fucking gorgeous," Jace said hopefully. He knew Alec wasn't much for partying, but he thought he'd give it a shot. But all he got in response was a shrug.

Alec sighed, looking disdainfully at his appearance. Jace left his perch on the doorframe walked up to him.

"Don't worry big bro, we'll find you some pussy soon. I can definitely tell you haven't been laid in a while."

Alec just shrugged again, looking uncomfortable. He'd never been much of a Casanova with the ladies. He was good looking, but he tended to stumble over words and not really care much what girls thought of him. Jace, being an everlasting girl magnet, could not understand his disinterest in the least. But he supposed everyone had their own ways.

"Well, you could always do the cougar thing," he said, stealing Isabelle's line for him. "Just make sure you look extra stuffy," he laughed. He moved his hands up to tighten Alec's loosened tie, and straightened his jacket. When he caught Alec's eyes again, he looked like he was in pain. He was definitely holding his breath, and he had the look of a deer caught in headlights.

"Jesus, man! I'm just joking. I won't stick you with Betty White or anything. But you definitely need some tang in your life. I will see to that," Jace said, clapping him on the back and moving away. The further away he got, he noticed Alec relax. He didn't know what to make of that, but brushed it off. Alec was weird sometimes. "Come on, Izzy's almost ready. We'll meet you downstairs." He turned and descended, leaving his brother alone.

When they got to the show, he was pleasantly surprised. There happened to be a lot of younger girls here. Maybe enough for him, and possibly one or two for Alec, he thought. They entered, one on each of Isabelle's arms. She, of course, smiled cordially at all the greetings thrown their way. He greeted the familiar faces, some he knew from the film business, some from his parents' usual social circle. He did the gentlemanly thing and stayed by Isabelle's side for the first half hour or so.

Then, his world got turned upside down. As a man climbed a podium at the front of the room, all the gathered people turned to face him. He introduced tonight's featured artist, Clarissa Fairchild. As she ascended to the podium, looking like she was going to throw up, Jace felt the wind knocked out of him. She was beautiful.

She was wildly different from the girls he usually flocked to, which were usually blonde with big tits and small brains. But this girl was short, redheaded, and freckly. She also was clearly uncomfortable with so many eyes on her, stuttering her thanks for them attending and inviting them to view the entire gallery at their leisure. She stepped down from her post, and he immediately made his way to her.

He found her next to one of her paintings, this one of a small row house with a view of the East River. It was cute and endearing, he thought, but that was as far as his art critique went. He approached her slowly, remembering that she was shy.

"Hello," he said, offering his hand. "I'm Jace Lightwood."

"Oh, hello," she returned as he kissed her hand. "And I know who you are."

"Well, good. We can skip the pleasantries," he said. He could swear as she turned her head slightly that she rolled her eyes. But he pushed that back; girls never did that to him. They always fawned. He continued with his usual repertoire: Flattery and proposition. "You're work is so exquisite," he began, trying to sound like he knew what he was talking about. He didn't know a damn thing about art.

"Well, thank you," she said. "What is it that you like about it? I personally don't really like the expression in this one. I kind of stuck it in here at the last moment. The tone is all wrong for the rest of the collection.

Shit, she'd called him on it. He had to think of something. "I think it's great," he said pitifully. So much for wowing her with his "art knowledge". He tried a different tactic. "But not so beautiful as you," he said with his trademark smile.

"Oh, thank you, Mr. Lightwood," she said. But she didn't blush like all the other girls usually did. Nor did she giggle. Which struck him as odd, since she seemed like the easily blushing type.

"Jace," he corrected. "How long do these things usually go on?" he asked.

"Oh I'm not sure. Just until everyone's had enough champagne and gossip I assume," she quipped. She still hadn't let on that she admired him at all, which was also something he'd never encountered. But he pressed on, hoping to hit a homerun before the night was over.

"Well, I was wondering if you'd like to catch a drink with me later. We could talk about your work, and you could school me on some art concepts, since I obviously know very little," he said, hoping to play to her good side by making her into the authority in the situation.

She finally turned to look fully at him. She didn't look hopeful or pleased by his request. "You know, I know you're used to a sort of rapidity of affection in your two-hour movies, Mr. Lightwood, but it doesn't work in real life. The heartthrob doesn't always get the girl just on principle," she said with an upturn of her nose.

"Excuse me?"

"Try being a little more subtle next time, and maybe the next girl will fall for your pearly whites and your lines," she said, and turned away into the crowd. He stood where he was, completely stunned. He had _never_ been turned down. Ever. Not even by the likes of Kim Kardashian or even Paris, and certainly not by such an obscure girl as this Clarissa. He didn't know what to do.

When he turned around, he noticed Isabelle standing a little ways away, and she was laughing hysterically behind her hand. He gave her the stink eye and walked off to find Alec. This party sucked.


	6. Chapter 6

They'd asked a dozen times, but he'd stood his ground. He was definitely not up to clubbing tonight. Or any night, for that matter.

"Aw, come on, bro! It'll be fun. Have a few drinks, meet some chicks, have some fun for once. Quit bein' such a tight ass." Jace could always be counted on to be subtle about his prodding in this arena. Yeah, right. He was still sore at that artist girl who blew him off a few days ago. Alec still chuckled to himself every time he thought about it.

"You know I hate that shit, Jace. Please, just this once, leave me alone about it?" Alec pleaded without much hope.

"Not a chance," Jace said, but for the moment he left to finish getting ready.

Isabelle came in Alec's room next. When would this ever end? He thought.

"You don't have to go if you don't want to, you know," she said. Alec was so shocked that he turned to look at her and let his eyes leave the Manchester United game on the television.

"Wow, Izz. I never thought I'd hear that from you. Did you suddenly grow a conscience?" he asked.

"No. I've always had that. But seriously, if you hate being around crowds that much, you don't have to go," she said, coming to sit beside him on the bed.

"Thanks, Izz. Now convince Jace so he'll leave me alone."

"I will. But first, you have to be honest with me about something," she began.

She said it in such a nonchalant way that he didn't even think about it. "Sure, whatever," he said, his eyes straying back to the game.

"Is it the crowd that bothers you, or the fact that Jace expects you to pick up girls?"

"He knows I'm not the ladykiller type. I just don't know why he pushes it so much. Why not leave me behind and claim them all for himself?" he said, still paying more attention to the game than Isabelle, but feeling apprehension grow in his stomach.

"No, that's not what I meant." She paused. "I mean, does it make you uncomfortable to be around _girls_?" she said, accentuating the last word slightly, but enough to make his attention completely move away from the game. He wheeled around to look at her, an expression of shock and terror on his face. The expression on hers gave the impression that she knew she'd hit the jackpot. But he tried to tell himself that wasn't true.

"What do you mean, Izzy? I'm comfortable around girls," he said nervously. She didn't buy it.

"I'm not talking about _me_," she said. "I'm your sister, I don't count. But I do notice things," she said gently.

"Oh, really?" he said sarcastically.

"Yeah. Like the fact that you are 23 years old and have never had a serious girlfriend. You don't even notice girls, even when they fawn over you. Sometimes you go overboard with the manliness, like you're overcompensating for something. And you hardly ever talk about dating, much less try it."

"Okay, Izzy! You can stop now," Alec said, irritated and embarrassed. "I haven't had a serious girlfriend because I'm too busy with soccer. I don't notice girls and I don't date because I just don't have the time or the inclination to deal with them. And I certainly do not overcompensate with manliness. I'm a jock, remember?" he spouted off contradictions to her statements, but he knew they were weak and had no real foundations.

"I don't believe that at all, Alec, and neither do you."

He turned away from her, not really seeing anything but just wanting to get his face away from her knowing gaze. He always felt like he could tell Izzy anything, but this was almost too far. He'd kept this secret since he was 12. A shame to know he'd done a really shitty job at it.

"Alec, look at me. I'm your sister, and I love you. Please tell me the truth?"

He turned to face her again. He was suddenly overcome with the urge to spill it all out, to tell her everything, but he couldn't find his voice. But, God love her, she knew. He didn't have to say it. She reached up and brushed away a tear he didn't know had fallen, and wrapped her arms around him. She held him for a long while, just letting him relax into her.

"God, I thought I was hiding it pretty well. But turns out I suck anyway," he said when she let him go.

"Oh, no. You're really good at hiding it. It's taken me years to come to this conclusion. But seriously, why do you feel you have to hide from us? From your family? From _me_?" He could tell she was a little hurt that he'd kept it from her, but he hadn't thought she'd take it so well.

"I was just afraid you guys wouldn't, you know, agree with it," he said lamely.

"Alec, honestly. Do you think we'd just turn off our love for you? Or what?"

"I don't know," he said, suddenly questioning his logic in the matter. "But if I told you guys, even if you were okay with it, you'd probably want me to come clean with the rest of the world, and I just can't do that," he said, shuddering at the thought.

"Alec, I don't expect you to put your love life on display for the world. That kind of thing is for people like Jace and Jennifer Lopez. I just want you to be honest with your family. We love you, no matter what you tell the paparazzi."

"I don't know. I've just gone on for so long keeping this to myself. It's bizarre that you've known all this time. I always wished I could tell you, but I just didn't know how. I told my car dozens of times, practicing in case I got up the balls to tell you, but I just never did," he said, chuckling without humor.

"You talk to your car? Alec, that's weird," she said, teasing.

"Well, who else am I going to talk to?" he said, getting serious again. "My teammates? Oh, that would go over real well," he said sarcastically.

"Why not? Don't they support you?"

"They're _men_, Izz. And jocks on top of that. Not everyone is as open and accepting as you, you know. And I'm also betting I could lump Jace in with them. Yet another reason why I never told you guys. He'd be completely weirded out by the fact that I don't like girls. He doesn't know any other way of life."

"He's your brother, Alec. I know you two don't get along sometimes, but seriously. Do you think he'd hate you or something?" He didn't answer her, because he didn't know the answer to that. "I'm appalled at you, Alexander Lightwood. Give us some credit. We're good people you know," she said.

"I know. But think about it. If I'd have come to you when I was 12 and you were 10 and said, 'I think I like guys and not girls' what would you have said?"

"Well, okay. Maybe I wouldn't have known what to say when I was 10, but still. You could have told me later."

"This is later," he said.

"But you didn't tell me. I figured it out," she returned.

"Yeah, I guess you're right."

They sat in silence for a moment. It wasn't awkward, but it wasn't comfortable either. Alec was still trying to come to terms with the fact that someone in the world knew his ultimate secret. It made him uneasy, like he didn't have a hold on his life anymore. But, it also took a little of the weight off his shoulders, knowing that Isabelle was okay with it.

"You know, a million girls and a few guys would envy the shit out of you if they knew," she said after a moment.

"What do you mean, envy me? For what?"

"You've seen David Beckham naked, and you're someone who would actually appreciate it," she said.

"I have not!" he exclaimed before he could stop himself. He blushed furiously.

"What do you mean, you haven't?" she asked, puzzled.

"I've never seen him, or any of the other guys naked," he said.

"You mean to tell me that you've been on that team for two years with a bunch of other sexy ass guys, you shower with them daily, and you've _never_ even looked? Not even accidentally? How is that even possible?"

"I almost never shower in the locker room. I wait till I get home," he explained. "It's just too weird and risky."

"Wow. I should slap you. You have the golden opportunity that a million girls would kill for and you don't even take advantage. Shame on you," she said, smiling and playfully slugging his shoulder. Her teasing made him smile. She had a way of putting him at ease, even in the direst situations.

"I'll keep that in mind next time," he said, knowing that she knew he didn't mean it. He didn't think he'd ever get over his fear of the locker room.

"Okay. Well, let me ask you one more time, and be honest with me. Do you not want to go tonight because you _truly_ don't want to go? Or because you just don't want to be pressured into dancing with girls?"

He thought for a moment, and then answered honestly. "I don't want to dance with girls," he said. "It's just not fun and it's awkward."

"Well, what if I told you I'd keep Jace off your back and you won't have to dance with any girls tonight. Would you take off your old man sweater and come out with us?" she asked, batting her eyes comically. He couldn't help but relent, so he nodded. She squealed with delight. "Okay, one more question and I swear I'll leave you alone," she said expectantly.

"What, Izzy?"

"Can I dress you up?"

_Oh, hell._

* * *

**Song for this section: Zombie by Natalia Kills (playing in the lounge. I absolutely LOVE the seductive beat of this song. I can totally imagine the covert conversation taking place with this blaring in the background.)**

As usual, the sparkly, spikey haired guy and the blonde Barbie girl were seated at their booth in the dark corner, overlooking the crowd. There was an obscene amount of people packed into the tiny lounge, considering it was a Thursday. This was probably the biggest crowd they'd seen yet, not even counting all the paparazzi around either.

"There's a shit ton of people in here tonight," Magnus observed aloud.

"I hadn't noticed," Camille returned. She was a bit sullen tonight, and that probably had something to do with the fact that she'd seen her latest lover and his 40 something wife earlier that evening. She was still bitter, even though she was the _other_ woman and really had no right.

"Sorry, princess. I'll leave you alone," he mocked.

"No it's alright. I'm sorry, I'll tone down the diva a little. I'm just still pissed about David."

"It's okay sweetie," he said, giving her a peck on her forehead.

"And it's probably so crowded because word got around that the entire Lightwood triumvirate decided to make an appearance," she added.

"What?" he asked. "There's three of them?"

"Yeah, dummy. I'm not surprised you forget about the third, though. Sports really isn't your thing. But damn, he's got a body on him, I can tell you that," she said, swooning.

"Huh. You're right, I wouldn't know about the jock in the family. Jesus he must feel overpowered by all that pretty in the family," Magnus joked. He hadn't the slightest clue there was another Lightwood sibling, or what he looked like or what sport he played. He definitely didn't keep up with things like that. "But how come you know about him? You don't speak meathead either. What gives?" he asked.

"Honey, I know hot men. And that boy gives the rest of the team a run for their money. I enjoy the occasional soccer game now and again, for him and a couple others, like Mr. Posh Spice," she said. Magnus had to admit, Victoria's husband had a glorious body. But that was all Magnus knew him as. The man could have played backgammon for a living for all Magnus knew.

"I don't know. Can he compete with blondie black belt?" Magnus asked, referring to the movie star in the family.

"Depends on what your taste is, but I would say that's a big fat yes. He's got that sweetie sex appeal thing going on," she said.

"Oh, I see. And where is Mr. Bend it Like Beckham this evening?" he asked, looking to the table where his sister was perched with her blonde brother, surrounded by cameras.

Camille looked around, but soon gave up. "Not sure. After those two, there must have not been enough narcissism left for him. Maybe he's hiding from the photogs?"

"Well, if that's the case, he sounds boring," Magnus said, sounding bored already.

"I thought you said you'd like to be with someone who didn't hog your spotlight," Camille reminded him.

"Oh, yes. Well, let me go and pounce on him then. Because we know for a fact he's gay and all," Magnus said sarcastically. "He's probably a juicehead type that gets an instant, shallow hard-on when he lays eyes on girls like, well, you," he said with a turn of his nose. Camille gave him a playful slap, though she was probably a little wounded at his use of 'shallow'.

"I will say this: he's never been photographed with a girl, no matter how many premieres of Jace's he's been to. He's always with his sister, and when she's got a date, he's by himself. It's worth a shot, babycakes," she said.

"Sure. Whatever you say," Magnus said, brushing the whole thing off. He was grateful to the jock he'd never seen for apparently drawing the crowd to his place, but it went no further than that. He kept sipping his cocktail.

All of a sudden, he was hit with a tidal wave of pure lust. It was like a dream sequence in a movie, complete with the fans above the dance floor blowing the boy's dark hair back as he approached. Magnus' gaze caught the most piercing blue eyes he'd ever encountered. They were glorious, set into a pale, angular face, and he wanted to drown in them. His eyes raked up and down the toned body that was generously clad in dark jeans, a studded belt, a black t-shirt and black blazer. His neck was adorned with a silver necklace that was shaped to look like barbed wire. He didn't exactly exude confidence, but then again, Magnus found his slumped shoulders kind of endearing. He was, without a doubt, the most gorgeous man in the room, and he didn't even know it.

"Oh, there's your 'juicehead' now," Camille said. He tore his eyes away from the beautiful boy to look at her.

"What?" he stammered.

"That's Alexander Lightwood. He plays for the LA Galaxy," she said.

"Who?"

"The guy you were shamelessly oogling just now. The one with the pretty blue eyes and adorable dimples," she explained.

He looked back at the boy, who had made his way past them to the bar. _That_ was a soccer jock? "Dear God, what a luscious piece of ass," he said aloud.

"Told you, you queen," Camille said, snickering.

"You're not telling me he's actually _related_ to those two," he said, pointing to Isabelle and Jace.

"Of course he is. He looks just like her, doesn't he?"

"Fuck no. He's ten times prettier. Oh my god, I will run my fingers over that ass before the night is over if it _kills_ me," he vowed. "And someday soon, I'll have the pleasure of writhing and moaning underneath those biceps."

Camille laughed quietly, not really taking him seriously. She'd better. He meant every word. He was overcome with the desire to be close to this Alexander Lightwood, and he would give in soon enough.

He got up, leaving Camille still chuckling. He made his way to the side of the room that housed the bar, finding the boy standing a few feet away from the rest of the crowd in a dark recess in the wall.

* * *

So he'd let Izzy and Jace drag him here. Now what? There was nothing for him to do but sit there and watch them talk to people. He didn't really know their friends, so he couldn't get a word in. They were also constantly surrounded by cameras. That sort of came with the territory, but he'd come here to escape in a way, and he couldn't stand the constant hovering, like vultures.

He'd decided to excuse himself for a drink. He really wanted to get away from Jace's prodding to hit the dance floor. He was thankful, at least, every time Isabelle deflected the attention off of him.

He made his way across the room to the bar, asking the pink-haired bartender for a Crown and coke. He needed something a little strong to make it through the night. Once he'd gotten his drink, he retreated to a dark spot to blend in with the surroundings.

"If you keep looking that delicious, I might have to drag you upstairs and take a nibble." The seductive, low voice had spoken from behind him, right into his ear. He was momentarily stunned, and didn't move. It took him a minute to process that the words had turned him on slightly, before he came to his senses and whirled around to look at his harasser.

He was about to make a smartass retort when he saw the man who'd spoken in his ear. He was undoubtedly sexy. His tanned skin was flawless, even under the thin layer of makeup he sported. His perfectly shaped eyes were an intoxicating greenish-yellow, and they were rimmed in black kohl, making them look extra enticing. He wore a tight purple tank top that shimmered when the light hit it. His hair was spiked into a fauxhawk. His slim hips were clad in skin-tight black leather. And then Alec noticed his glossy lips. They were full and inviting, and Alec almost lost himself. But he recovered.

"What the fuck are you talking about?" he snapped.

"Well, you _do_ look positively edible, and I'm rather hungry at the moment," the man said, leaning carelessly against the wall beside him. Alec tried to fight down the burgeoning erection in his pants when the man cocked a perfectly sculpted eyebrow. Damnit, that was hot. He hadn't been _this_ turned on by a guy, hell, by anyone. It was hard to keep his cool.

"Well, you're out of luck, bro. I don't swing that way," he said weakly, but the man had already undoubtedly seen the look on Alec's face as he appraised him.

"I've got 9 inches that says you do," the man retorted. Alec gulped and his eyes grew wide. He was blushing, but he thanked his lucky stars that it was so dark in the room, so he could retain at least a tiny bit of dignity. "Don't worry, I won't tell. I'm assuming you don't want the lenses to know?" he asked, gesturing with his eyes to the paparazzi scattered throughout the club. "I'm sure it can't be easy for a sports star like yourself, but I can promise you I'll make it worth your while," he said, reaching up to run a finger down the side of Alec's torso.

Alec made the mistake of letting his eyes slip shut and emitting a soft sigh at the feeling. He could practically hear the man smile.

"What exactly are you proposing?" he asked in a shaky voice, trying to stall and think of a getaway. But did he really _want_ to get away from this tall, dark, and handsome stranger?

"Well, like I said, we could go upstairs and have a little fun. But if you're afraid someone will notice your absence or hear us having fun, I could just kick everyone out and we could have the place to ourselves," he finished with another raise of his eyebrow. Jesus, the things that eyebrow did to Alec's crotch were killing him.

"I don't think the owner would like that too much," Alec persisted.

"Oh, I don't think he would mind. Considering the owner is the one who'd be here with you, having the time of our lives," the man said. Well, shit. He was cornered, and with the owner of the place for crying out loud. But it made a lot of sense, in the back of Alec's mind. As he looked the man up and down again, he noticed he sort of matched the place. Dark and mysterious, but glitzy and glamorous at the same time. He sparkled like the dance floor.

"I still don't think it's a good idea," he said. He was losing steam, but he was also still terrified that some photographer would catch them in this dark corner, snap a shot, and get the headline _right_ for a change. Alec shivered in fear at the possibility.

The man could tell he was in a losing battle. "Fine. But if you ever change your mind" he trailed off, and Alec felt fingertips brush his left ass cheek through his jeans. He jumped slightly, but settled when the man pulled his hand back and had Alec's phone in his palm. He was pressing buttons rapidly, finishing in a few seconds and handing the phone back to Alec. "you know where to find me." He swept away, making his way across the room to sit in a corner booth with a voluptuous blonde.

Alec didn't understand. If the man was gay, why was he here and sitting in a dark corner with a silicone stuffed Playmate? He shook his head to clear it, and started back towards his sister and brother.

"Are you okay? You look like you've seen a ghost," Isabelle observed when he reached their VIP table.

"Yeah, the naked ghost of Marilyn Monroe. Did you get head in the corner or something? You've got that just-fucked flush on your face," Jace said, as usual devoid of any tact. This only made Alec blush harder.

"Oh shut up Jace. Not everyone is as shallow as you. You know, one of these days a camera's going to catch you with your pants down behind the bar. What are you going to tell the producers, then?" Isabelle retorted. Jace didn't answer her; he just rolled his eyes and went back to admiring the girls around the room. She turned to Alec and whispered, "So? What's up with you?"

"I got ambushed, I guess you could say," he said, looking down.

"Did you like it? 'Cause Jace is right, you look a little hot and bothered," she said, smirking. He blushed even more, because it was true. He didn't answer her, just gestured with his eyes to the corner where the man and the blonde were seated, occasionally flashing glances in their direction. "_Him_? The owner? Damn, Alec. He's a piece of sexy, that one," she gushed. "I'd love to run my fingers through that hair."

"Okay, you don't have to elaborate, Izz. But he's persistent. And graphic," he said. He was a little apprehensive, but his siblings were right. The man's words and actions and look had definitely lit his fire. He went back to nervously sipping his drink, unable to banish thoughts of the sexy whisper from his mind.

* * *

"So? Is he walking the straight and narrow?" Camille asked when Magnus returned to their booth, after working the crowd for a few more minutes.

"Definitely not. But that _is_ the general consensus of the public, I gather, and he seems to want to keep it that way," he said.

"Oh, a closeted jock. Never heard that one before," Camille retorted with endless sarcasm. "So I'm guessing you're moving on?"

"Not so much," he said. She gave him a surprised look. He expected it, since his normal mode of operation was to forget those who turned him down once. He figured it was their loss. But this one was different. It had started out as shallow, surface lust, but as they'd had their short, quiet little conversation, it had grown to something else. He wanted to _know_ Alexander Lightwood. He wanted to get to know the man underneath those long dark lashes and emotional blue eyes. Considering his reaction, he gave the boy 24 hours to either call or come back to the club. He was nothing if not confident. He spent the rest of the night admiring his new conquest from afar.


	7. Chapter 7

He'd taken out his phone a hundred times, pressed contacts, scrolled down to the name, even opened up a blank text, but then he always chickened out. What was he supposed to say, anyway? 'Hey, you're really hot, and I like it when you whisper in my ear. Can we do that again, soon?' All completely true words, but Alec would _never_ actually text them to the guy.

He had a weird name, too. Magnus Bane. At first he didn't think it was real, just a random name the guy had filed himself under in Alec's phone. But then, earlier that day, Izzy had asked him if he'd talked to 'Magnus'. He asked her if that was his real name, and she said as far as she knew, it was. It didn't even help to deter Alec. It made the man all the more intriguing. He found himself wanting to know everything about the mysterious club owner, but he had no clue how to go about it.

It wasn't like he could call him up and suggest they go out somewhere. Magnus would probably love that, but Alec couldn't risk it. The man was obviously out and proud, but Alec shuddered at the thought of the likes of Perez finding out the _other_ heartthrob of the LA Galaxy was actually gay. It would be a nightmare; it would be everywhere. He wouldn't be able to face his teammates again. They'd all give him dirty looks in the locker room, give him hell on the field; no, he couldn't risk that. So a public meeting was out of the question.

So what did that leave? Inviting himself over to Magnus' house? He didn't even know where he lived. They certainly couldn't rendezvous at the Lightwood house; what in God's name would Alec tell the rest of them? He wasn't exactly the age where he could invite someone over, go in his room, and claim they were just playing video games or something. Not anyone as sexy as Magnus, at least.

He hadn't thought of a solution when Isabelle strolled in through his cracked open door to find him lying in bed, staring up at his phone.

"Are you going to call him?" she asked absently, like it was no big deal.

"I don't know, Izz! What would I say?" he asked.

"'Hello' usually works pretty well," she quipped.

"You know what I mean, Izzy. What comes after 'hello'? It's not like I could meet him at Starbucks or something. New York is just like LA there are cameras everywhere you turn. You know I can't do that, Izz," he said, his voice getting a little frantic at the end.

"No one's asking you to put on your own pride parade, Alec, geez," she retorted. "But you do deserve to be happy in life. And if that road begins with Magnus Bane, so be it."

"You act like it was love at first sight or something. He ambushed me in a dark corner. That's got the makings of stalking," he said.

"Oh, shut up. You're just nervous because you've never had a guy make a serious pass at you before," Isabelle said, examining her perfect manicure.

"I have, too," Alec said, before he realized what he was saying.

Isabelle abandoned her nails. "What? You've been hit on by a guy and you never even thought to say yes? Jesus Alec. You're worse than I thought. We're going to have to have an intervention with you," she said with a determined look. Alec was turning a little greenish.

"Well, it's not like I'm an expert at dating _dudes_, Izz. I mean, even though I'm not attracted to girls, I know the general rules: take them out to dinner, buy them a stuffed animal, cuddle with them, yada yada. But with a guy, I wouldn't know where to start."

"First of all, not _all _girls are into cuddling." She shuddered slightly. "Second of all, you _are_ a guy. Think of what _you_ would like to do, and go from there."

"Well, if it were me, I'd love to go to a soccer game, of course. Or maybe running in the park, or a good game of one-on-one b-ball in the backyard," he said.

She looked at him grimly. "Honestly, I've never talked to the guy myself, but do you think Magnus Bane looks the type to want to get all sweaty in the park with you?" She paused. "Wait, don't answer that." He was laughing softly. "But you know what I mean, Alec. Think of things you could do together."

"Well, I like action movies," he said.

"There's a start," she said. "Go to the movies. Just not to one of Jace's. That would be awkward," she said. He nodded in agreement. Magnus would probably end up drooling over Jace, or worse, Alec would. He shuddered.

"But Izz, I'm not sure I could do the whole public thing. In fact, I know I can't. It's just too I don't know exposed for me," he said lamely.

"I get it. But seriously, how do you expect to have a normal relationship anytime in the future if you don't give it a try now? And really, you don't have make it a _date_; just go as friends. Two guys going to the movies as friends isn't a tabloid headline. You and Jace used to do it all the time before you left. What harm could there be?"

He had to concede that she was right. No one could construe the outing in such a way that he couldn't just deny it and say Magnus was just a friend. No harm done. So what was the problem?

"Okay. I'll try it. But I'm running at the first sign of the parade," he said.

"Fine by me. PDA, gay or not, is always better left behind closed doors. I think it leaves a lot more to the imagination when your makeouts aren't blasted on YouTube," Isabelle agreed.

"Someone should really tell Jace that," Alec muttered.

"Oh, I don't think that really applies to him. Plus, he's helped that guy who videoed him and Vanessa Hudgins get over a million subscribers. He'd just tell you he did a good deed." Alec laughed, and agreed it was probably true.

When she left the room with an encouraging smile, he found himself getting nervous again. But he just repeated the conversation over in his head. Yes, he did deserve to be happy. And no one was going to do it for him; he was going to have to live his own life. He would just have to be extra careful that the world didn't find out.

**Alec:** hey

**Magnus:** hey there, gorgeous

**Alec:** this is Alexander Lightwood, btw

**Magnus:** I know. I saw the LA area code. I knew you'd use my number sooner or later

**Alec:** So

**Magnus:** So how's ur day going?

**Alec:** it's alright I guess.

**Magnus:** that sounds depressing. You should get out more.

**Alec:** I'm not really sure how to do this

**Magnus:** what's that?

**Alec**: you know, date. A guy I mean.

**Magnus:** are we dating? Jesus baby you move fast ;)

Alec thought he might die. He looked back at what he'd said, and his face turned the color of fresh watermelon. He'd meant it completely innocently, but he'd already blown it, and Magnus was making fun of him. His phone buzzed again a few minutes later.

**Magnus:** I was kidding, you know

**Alec:** sorry, but I was telling the truth

**Magnus:** oh, I never doubted you. It's endearingly obvious that you're inexperienced with wooing.

**Alec:** with what?

**Magnus:** nevermind. But I WAS wondering when you were going to ask me out, or if you were just toying with me

**Alec:** I wouldn't do that

**Magnus:** that's sweet of you

**Alec:** I was wondering if you would like to, I don't know. Do something?

**Magnus:** sounds intriguing. Like what?

**Alec:** movie?

**Magnus:** as long as it doesn't involve your brother

**Alec:** ?

**Alec:** Oh. No, we don't have to see his.

**Magnus:** you know what? I've got a better idea

**Alec:** ?

**Magnus:** I'm assuming you are still hiding behind closet doors?

That hurt a little, but he had to admit it was true. He sighed and answered.

**Alec:** yeah.

**Magnus:** well, aren't you afraid someone will see us and snap a portrait?

**Alec:** we could just go as friends

**Magnus:** that's not very fair to me

**Alec:** well, what's your idea?

**Magnus:** you could come over here

**Alec:** you mean to your house?

**Magnus:** well, condo is the more appropriate term

Alec thought about this for a while. It seemed like a good idea, but then he thought about being alone with this man in his house for an undisclosed amount of time. The idea both terrified him and turned him on.

**Magnus:** I promise I won't bite. I just figured you'd want a little more private venue. We don't even have to touch. We can just talk

**Alec:** where do you live?

**Magnus:** Brooklyn

**Alec:** I guess that sounds ok.

Magnus texted him his full address. While Alec was writing it down on a piece of paper, he received one last message.

**Magnus:** patiently waiting


	8. Chapter 8

He'd taken a cab to Brooklyn, not risking Hodge asking questions about his destination. They didn't really know anyone in Brooklyn, so he'd have a tough time explaining it without blushing up a storm and talking himself into an uncomfortable corner.

When they pulled up in front of the correct address, Alec was pleasantly surprised. As a rich boy raised in Manhattan, he'd come to have a certain picture of Brooklyn in his mind, and it wasn't all that impressive. But Magnus' building was very nice looking from the outside. It actually reminded him of his building in LA; not too big, but big enough to offer comfortable living space. He could picture himself living here. Just after that last thought, his mental train screeched to a halt. That was a little too much, he told himself.

Blushing, without the driver having a clue as to why, he handed the man a folded pile of bills and got out. He approached the steps as the yellow car sped away. There were about 10 names on the list of buzzers; he found the one marked 'Bane' and pressed it.

"Yes?" came that familiar silky voice he remembered from the club.

"Um, it's me. Alexander Lightwood," he said softly, his head turning every which way constantly to make sure he wasn't followed by any curious photographers. They usually stuck like glue to Jace and Izzy, but he could never be too careful.

"Come on up, babe," Magnus answered as the door clicked open.

Alec blushed furiously again at the endearment; looking both ways one more time, he slipped stealthily inside.

Magnus lived in the penthouse, apparently. Alec had assumed he had money, what with owning a club and all, but he didn't think it was that much, since he only owned _one_. Most people who got into that kind of business and were successful usually had two or three. But this Magnus Bane had surprises around every corner so far, so Alec didn't dwell on the details.

When the elevator deposited him on the top floor, he stepped out into a room that hit him first with its stark whiteness. It took his eyes a moment to adjust from the dark green of the elevator. He found it hard to believe that the man he knew could live in such bland surroundings. He'd been picturing Magnus' abode in his mind on the way over, and it always had some kind of rainbow wall or something somewhere. But then, as he looked around the room, he started to notice little pieces of Magnus.

The walls were a pure white, and made of a very glossy lacquer that reflected the light from the floor to ceiling windows, except for the far wall, which was exposed gray brick. But the walls were the only white in the entire room. The furnishings were vivid pops of color. A pair of electric blue armchairs sat with their backs to him, facing a clear glass coffee table with multicolored glossy, glittering legs. On the other side of that was something Alec immediately associated with Magnus: an oversized, furry, hot pink couch. The thing was massive, and looked very comfy. He imagined sinking into the fluffy cushions.

The floors were a dark mahogany, and gleamed with fresh varnish. There was a dining table made of what looked like thick black plastic, and it had very modern curves in it.

On the walls, however, were artifacts that looked as old as time. There were French original oil paintings (Alec knew this from his mother's obsession with expensive art), and along one wall a massive bookcase housed volume upon volume, each looking as if it had come from a different century. There were also books of sheet music that looked like they came from the time of Mozart. The meshing of ancient and modern throughout the room made it very interesting, and almost ultimately reminded him of Magnus. Alec was so in awe with his surroundings, he didn't notice the other man enter the room.

"That's my favorite artifact in the entire place," he said, coming over to where Alec stood staring at the books.

"Which one?" Alec asked.

"This," Magnus said, slipping out a tattered volume that was about 2 inches thick and had gold leaf on the edges of its thick pages. "It's an original printing of Dracula. My mother gave it to me for my tenth birthday. I was a morbid little child," he said, laughing to himself.

"That's amazing, Magnus," Alec said, admiring the book. "Dracula is actually my second favorite novel of all time."

"Is that so?" Magnus said with a smile. He turned around and went to sit on the huge couch, beckoning Alec to follow, which he did, having a seat across from him; the couch was big enough so that they could both sit and face each other, and still be about 4 feet away from each other. "So, what do we do now?" he asked with a smile.

"Well, I expected you to know. _You_ invited _me_ over," Alec answered with a blush, feeling cornered.

"Oh I know, I just wanted to see that color in your cheeks again," he said with a chuckle.

"What do you mean, again?" Alec asked with trepidation.

"Well, you were the color of a ripe Red Delicious last night; even in the dark it was obvious."

"Hmph," was Alec's brilliant remark.

Magnus laughed. "I can't believe it. I have a big time soccer jock sitting on my couch pouting because I made him blush. That's one for the memoir, at least."

"I've already made it into your life story? We don't even know each other," Alec said.

"And yet, here you are. Well, why don't we get to know each other, then?" Magnus asked expectantly.

"Sure. What do you want to do? Play twenty questions?" Alec joked.

"Why not?" Magnus was completely serious. Alec had to admit it would be an ice breaker, and the attention would be divided between them, instead of constantly on him, which is what he felt like under Magnus' scrutinizing gaze.

"Okay. You can go first," he offered.

"Alright. What's the first?" he asked.

Alec was puzzled. "First what?"

"You said Dracula was your second favorite novel," he clarified. "What's the first?"

"Oh, that would be A Tale of Two Cities," Alec answered honestly.

"Elaborate, please. Why Dickens?" Magnus prodded.

"Oh, no. One at a time," Alec answered teasingly. Magnus nodded for him to go. "Where are you from? Originally, I mean."

"Why do you assume I'm from somewhere else?" he asked.

"Because you don't have a Brooklyn accent," Alec answered.

"That I do not. I was raised in London," he said. Alec thought he detected a hint of an English accent. His a's were longer than normal American English. And he had a way of speaking that was clear and affirmative, but not harsh, like most New Yorkers. His voice had already done a number on Alec, but he tried not to think about it too much. "My turn. Why soccer? Why not movies or modeling?"

"Because I've loved playing soccer since I was practically in diapers. Jace and Isabelle, they were never into the whole 'getting dirty' thing. Isabelle would always screech about having to go to my games and sit outside in the sun where she might sweat. And Jace, well, he was always too obsessed with his face to jeopardize it by putting it in the line of fire on the field. So, I'm the only one in the family that actually does physical labor, you could say," he said, chuckling.

"But what about Jace and his action movies? I mean, doesn't that require a bit of, well, _action_ on his part?" Magnus asked.

"Oh, it took a long ass time for him to get up the courage to actually perform his own stunts. He still doesn't do them all. He's good at fight scenes and stuff like that, but it's all choreographed anyway. He only works out to keep the girls around, really."

"Wow. Secrets of the famous Lightwood family. I'm so privileged," Magnus said with a grin. Alec smiled at his teasing.

"Okay, my turn again. Why did you leave London?"

"To go to school in Florida," Magnus answered way too quickly.

"Is that the real reason?" Alec prodded.

"I did actually go to school in Florida, yes. But no, I guess it's not the real reason. But the real reason will have to wait for another day," he said, and his expression was so closed off that Alec didn't poke any further. Magnus' smile returned after a few seconds, though.

"What's your number?" Magnus asked.

"Uh, don't you have it? I texted you" Alec was puzzled.

"No, I mean your _number_. On your jersey?" he clarified.

"Oh, thirty-two," he said. "You knew who I was, but you didn't know my number?" he asked, incredulous. Magnus looked very sheepish. "What is it?"

"I didn't know who you were until last night. Honestly, I didn't know there _was_ a third Lightwood, let alone that you were famous in your own right. As you can probably tell, I'm not the biggest sports fan," he said, still looking a tiny bit embarrassed.

"Actually, that's kind of refreshing," Alec said. "But let me ask you this: did you approach me after you found out I was a Lightwood, or before?"

"Well, technically after. But that's not _why_ I felt drawn to you," Magnus said with a glint in his eye.

"Why, then?" Alec asked, genuinely curious.

"Have you _looked_ in a mirror, Alexander?" This made Alec blush again, causing Magnus to chuckle under his breath. "Okay, back to the questions. I lost track of who's turn it is, so go ahead."

"Alright. Worst fear?" Alec asked.

"Easy. Heights," Magnus answered.

"Then why the penthouse?" he wondered.

"Because it's the best," Magnus said, and laughed out loud. At Alec's puzzled look, he explained. "Oh, I guess I shouldn't expect you to have memorized Pretty Woman?" he chuckled again. "What about you? What's your worst fear?"

"Easy," Alec parroted. "Dancing."

"Oh, dear. We're going to have to do something about that, babe." Magnus had an evil gleam in his eye, but left it at that. Alec didn't press the issue further, hoping he'd forget about it by the end of the night.

"Okay, um," Alec thought hard. He'd been wanting to ask this question of another man in his situation, but he'd never encountered one he vaguely trusted until now. "When did you know? That you were gay, I mean."

"When I was about 9 I guess. For a long time, I considered myself bisexual, since I found myself attracted to women _on occasion_," he said, accentuating the last words with a little apprehension. "Honestly, it was always surface lust with them, and as I look back on it, it was probably because I had just come out of a relationship with a guy and was feeling a little bitter towards men at the moment," he said.

Alec waited for him to ask the same question, and he braced himself for it. But what came out of Magnus' mouth was entirely different.

"Are you a virgin?" he asked. Alec's head popped up and tried to read any condescension in the other man's expression. He found none. "It's okay if you are"

"I'm not," he said. Wow. He'd said it, out loud to someone. Not even Izzy knew this.

"Can I ask you to elaborate? Because your expression is killing me right now," Magnus said.

"Okay. If you're asking if I've ever had sex, the answer is yes. If you're asking if I've ever been with a guy, the answer is no."

"So, you lost it to a girl?"

"Yeah, when I was 16, and it was horrible," Alec said quietly.

"Is that when you found out you were gay?" Magnus asked.

"No, I guess I figured that out when I was about 12," he answered. This was hard to talk about. He'd always regretted what he did, which is why he hadn't told anyone. "I knew this girl in high school that liked me, a lot. She and I used to hang out a lot, and I honestly never noticed that she was so infatuated. I guess I was so wrapped up in my own problems that I didn't see it. One day we were hanging out at her house, and she kissed me. I was seriously disgusted, not because of her, but because I wasn't attracted to women at all. But in that moment, I saw a way out," Alec paused, working to get the rest out. He'd already started, after all, might as well finish. Magnus waited quietly for him to go on.

"I thought I could use her as a cover, you know? I'd heard of guys doing that, and it never turned out well, but I thought, 'why shouldn't it work for me?' Not a soul on earth knew I was gay. I could just keep it to myself forever, I thought. We ended up secretly dating for a couple of weeks, while remaining friends on the outside. One day she came over with a box of condoms. I was terrified for all the wrong reasons, but I went through with it. I broke up with her the next day, because I was so disgusted. To this day I feel like I used her, and she didn't deserve it one bit." When he was finished, he was looking down. He felt so ashamed, but it felt good to finally unload that doozy on someone.

Magnus was silent for a long moment, and Alec was afraid he'd alienated him. But when he looked up, Magnus' face was kind and understanding. "You've never told anyone about this?" Alec shook his head. "Well, I'm glad you trusted me with something like that. It's flattering," he said.

This was totally not the reaction Alec had expected at all when he pictured telling someone about Amy. But he was pleasantly surprised by Magnus Bane, once again.

"If it's any consolation, I lost mine to a mediocre looking guy and it sucked royally," he said with a knowing smile. Alec laughed, and just like that, the mood was light again. It was like being with his sister, if his sister had been an incredibly attractive man. He didn't notice Magnus' expression when he turned his face away, but there was something about it that belied his previous statement. Something that he was trying to cover up. It was gone before they glanced at each other again.

"So, why a nightclub?" Alec asked, getting back to their game.

"Oh, _please_ don't call it that. I hate that word. It makes my establishment sound like an overgrown, permanent rave or something. No. Cherry Bomb is a _lounge_," he said. "A place where people can mingle and drink without being forced to listen to crappy techno, or hip hop, and remain perpetually standing on the dance floor while they try to talk. I modeled the place after me, in a way. I like to sit back and enjoy the atmosphere, remaining on the periphery until I feel like immersing myself."

"I noticed that you do that," Alec said. "And that when you weren't harassing me, you are permanently attached to lifesize Barbie," he said teasingly. "Sorry, but it's true."

"Oh, she wouldn't mind you saying that about her. That's what she strives for every time she goes under the knife on some poor shmuck's dime. Camille's alright, though. She's my best friend; she helped me design the place, and I cut her in twenty percent. It's not like I need the money," he said, and then stopped, looking like he'd said too much.

"But you never answered my question. Why open a place like that? You don't strike me as a businessman," Alec explained.

"You're right, I'm definitely not. Camille convinced me to use my inheritance for something that made me happy. So, I bought and built a place that I could feel completely at home in."

"You have definitely put your touch on the place. You matched last night," Alec said with a smirk.

"It's always planned, darling. Every detail of my appearance is so carefully executed, they come to me for help when there's a crisis during fashion week," he joked, although Alec could definitely see that happening. However, Alec did take this opportunity to scrutinize Magnus a little more closely.

He was wearing a black ribbed tank top underneath a blue, gray, and white flannel that he left unbuttoned. He had on faded, tattered True Religions, and he was barefoot; his toes were a sparkly purple. His hair was down out of its spikes, choosing to fall loosely over his right eye. Every now and then he would flick his head a little to get it out of the way, but it would fall right back down. His hair was absolutely beautiful; after his gorgeous eyes, it was the most intoxicating thing about him. Alec longed to touch it and see if it was as soft as it looked.

He was wearing very minimal makeup, only a thin line of black around his eyes. His lips were bare, and Alec couldn't help but wonder what they tasted like. He fought down the desire that flared up at the thought. They'd just met, for crying out loud. But he'd only ever kissed a girl, and he'd always wondered what it would be like to kiss a guy.

"Okay, enough with the questions," Magnus said suddenly, pulling Alec out of his reverie. "Come here," he said, getting up and offering Alec his hand.

Alec wasn't sure where this was going, but he got tense all of a sudden.

"Oh, come on. I told you I don't bite, remember?" Magnus prodded. He dropped his hand and went over to the far wall to a large black cabinet. He opened it up and grabbed a small black remote with a touch screen on it. He pressed a few buttons, and all of a sudden, the entire penthouse was filled with a slow, seductive beat.

"What are you doing, Magnus?" Alec asked, apprehensive.

"Well, since I've already got you here, and I'm pretty _damn_ sure that you'd never do it in public, I'm going to teach you to dance," he said, coming over and holding out his hand again.

Alec knew he looked like a deer caught in headlights as he took Magnus' hand and let him pull him to a standing position.

"Magnus, it's four in the afternoon. Isn't this kind of thing reserved for places like Cherry Bomb at, like, night time?" He was hoping to avoid the situation altogether. He didn't want to embarrass himself beyond all repair.

"Oh, that problem's easily solved," Magnus returned. He picked up the remote again and touched it multiple times again. Alec watched as the floor to ceiling windows on one end of the room were slowly covered by lowering purple velvet curtains, blocking out all the light. The room was pitch black for a moment, then a row of lights recessed into the hardwood floor came on to glow dimly, giving the room the distinct look of Magnus' beloved lounge. "Now, what other excuses do you have up your sleeve, so I can dispel them?" he asked.

Alec didn't have any more, to his distress.

"Now, come here. I swear it won't kill you," Magnus said, beckoning Alec to a clear area of floor space, the sexy beat still thumping in the background. Alec walked over to him with trepidation, but determined to stand his ground. He wasn't a pussy, and he'd prove it. "Wait, hold on a second."

Magnus reached his hands up and peeled back the flannel he was wearing, slipping it down and off his arms, throwing it onto the couch. His tan, immaculate arms took on a sensual tone in the low light of the room. Alec let those arms reach up to him and push his jacket off his shoulders, throwing it over to join Magnus' shirt. All of a sudden, he was very thankful for the article being gone. He was burning up.

"Okay, now give me your hand," Magnus said. Alec complied. Magnus placed Alec's right hand on his hip, where his tattered jeans hung low. He did the same with the other one. "Now, just let your hands follow my hips, okay?"

"Okay," Alec said in a shaky voice. And then Magnus started to move. The sway was so fluid and sensual that Alec was instantly hard. His hands stayed lightly on Magnus' hips while he moved to the beat, rolling and popping every now and then, only inches between them.

Then, Magnus reached up and rested his arms casually on Alec's shoulders. His hands curled around to caress the back of Alec's neck, and Alec felt himself moving closer. Soon enough, their hips were grinding together to the intoxicating beat. Alec hadn't noticed when he'd started moving along with Magnus, but he honestly didn't care at the moment. Magnus had worked one leg in between Alec's, bringing them as close as they could get in their current position. As it was, his thigh was rubbing up against Alec's painfully hard erection, making him moan in pleasure. They hadn't even kissed, and already he was aroused beyond any point he'd ever been with anyone else.

Every now and then, Magnus would change from swaying his hips right and left to rolling the forward into Alec's crotch, eliciting a low moan. Alec noticed after a while that in their current position, his leg was doing the same to Magnus. He'd never thought dancing could be thisâ€¦sexually satisfying. They were still fully clothed, which was a miracle.

Magnus' hands moved up the back of his neck to twine in his hair. Alec let his hands grip Magnus' hips tighter, one sliding around to rest just above his ass, pressing him into Alec further. Magnus let his lips rest on Alec's neck, occasionally flicking his tongue out onto the heated skin, making Alec whimper, and his eyes roll back in his head.

It wasn't a conscious decision, but Alec pulled back, disengaging Magnus from his neck, and looked him in the eye for a split second before slowly moving in. He wet his lips with his tongue, and descended on those full luscious lips he'd been fantasizing about since the night before. It went slow at first, with each simply nipping and suckling on each other's bottom lips. But soon enough, it turned into a full kiss.

After a few moments of what Alec thought was sheer bliss, Magnus' tongue darted out to probe the line between Alec's lips. He sighed, and that tongue slipped inside. Alec's moan vibrated between them, making the experience surreal. They were still vaguely moving to the music, but the sensation of Magnus' wet muscle in Alec's mouth was taking over.

Magnus seemed to pick up on this, because he stopped grinding his hips long enough to begin guiding Alec back to the couch. He backed up until his legs hit, and he sat down, pulling Alec down on top of him without ever breaking the kiss. They lay lengthwise on the furry couch, and Alec noticed why it was so huge. It was long enough to accommodate Magnus' 6'4" frame comfortably underneath him.

They continued their kiss, Alec grinding his hips into Magnus occasionally, pulling moans and grunts from both of them. When they ran out of air, Alec moved down to suck on the spot just above Magnus' Adam's apple. Alec watched with satisfaction as Magnus' eyes rolled back and he felt the vibration against his lips.

They continued this way for another two hours before their lips and jaws started aching and Alec had to relent because he knew his family was wondering where he was.

"Oh, don't go yet," Magnus whined in a low voice. "We're just getting started."

"I have to. I don't want my parents to send out a search party. They're insane like that, you know. I'm twenty-three years old and they still hover like I'm in pull-ups or something." His joking remark was rendered useless by his breathlessness. Magnus didn't seem to mind, as he was in a similar state.

Once they'd extricated themselves from each other, and had a few more relapses of heated kisses, they said their goodbyes, promising to see each other again soon. Neither could stand for it to be very long, though. They were already addicted to each other. Lust tended to do that to both of them.

Magnus reached over the back of the couch and handed Alec his jacket, but Alec waved it away. He picked up Magnus' shirt and slipped his arms into it. It surrounded him with the smell of Magnus, which was enough to get him off at this point. Magnus smiled and walked him to the elevator. They had one more long kiss and grope before the doors cut them off.

Alec leaned against the wall of the elevator car, ran a finger over his bottom lip, and chuckled to himself. He was hooked.


	9. Chapter 9

He lay in his bed, relishing the rare opportunity to be lazy. This was the first time he'd slept in in almost two years. Even on days when he didn't have 8 a.m. practice, he usually got up and went running or to the gym. But today, he was too conflicted to think about working out.

He thought back on his previous evening in Brooklyn with the flashy lounge owner. He'd never even kissed a guy before, and he'd ended up making out for a good three hours on Magnus' furry pink couch. And it was _very_ nice, making out with those full, luscious lips; he'd enjoyed it immensely, and had to take a long cold shower when he got back to his parents' house. And he definitely didn't mind dancing anymoreâ€¦okay, maybe he wouldn't ever do it in public, but a little bit in private was definitely not as excruciating as he thought it would have been.

The problem now was: where did they go from here? He knew they weren't considered a couple, after only a few kisses. (Okay, more than a few, but still.) But he wasn't sure what they were to each other now. He wanted to see Magnus again, soon, but he wasn't sure if Magnus would want to see him. After all, he sounded like he'd had a lot more experience in dating, and a lot more confidence. What if this was something he did with multiple people? If Alec called, would he interrupt a similar event?

He was surprised at the small flicker of jealousy that hit him at that idea. But certainly Magnus was allowed to see whoever he wanted, in any capacity he wanted. Alec just wasn't sure what capacity he considered their relationship to be in. He had enjoyed the night, letting Magnus' tongue work its undeniable magic in his mouth. But he'd also enjoyed the long talk they'd had prior to the making out. He wanted to know more about Magnus Bane, other than what he looked like naked. Although, that would be nice to know, tooâ€¦

"You know, the rest of us live in 2010." Isabelle's voice coming from the doorway startled him out of his thoughts, and his face turned red.

"What are you talking about?" he said, his voice squeaking a little, which he tried to hide and write off as sleepiness.

"I don't think there's anything on your iPod that was released after 1997," she said, leaning casually against the doorframe.

"So? What's your point?" he asked.

"My point is that if you listened to something a little more current, you might be inspired to take off that old man sweater of yours and join us in the _now_," she said.

"I like it. And Kurt Cobain's one of the greatest. Much better than that whiney twelve year old piece of shit you listen to," Alec said.

"Oh, don't knock the Biebs. We all have our weird little fetishes," she said with a smirk. "Which reminds me, are you developing one for a certain guy-lined, glam rock club owner?"

"He hates that word, you know," he said.

"So that _was_ where you were! Did you two get to _know_ each other?" she said, bobbing her eyebrows up and down.

"Jesus, Izz. I just met the man. I'm not going to hop into bed with him five minutes later," Alec said. Although, the thought of hopping into bed with Magnus Bane did sound rather appealing. He blushed just thinking about it, though; he wasn't sure if he'd ever get up the courage to do _that_ with a man. At least, not anytime soon.

Isabelle seemed to read his train of thought on his face. "So you _are_ thinking about hopping into bed with him, though," she said, still smirking at him. He turned redder.

"Don't you have somewhere to be?" he pleaded. "There are better things to do than nag me when I'm trying to enjoy an extra hour or two of sleep."

"You weren't sleeping," she said. "And besides, I'm bored and I've missed you and I wanted to go out and do something with you. So get your ass up and get dressed."

"That sounds vaguely ominous. Before I actually get out of bed, what did you have in mind?"

"Get out of bed and get dressed and I'll tell you."

"Fat chance. Now I'm even more curious. And scared."

"Fine. I wanted to go shopping okay?"

"Oh I get it. You've got a gay brother and you couldn't think of anything that he would like to do more than shopping?" Alec said with a chuckle.

"Quite the contrary. I know for a fact you hate shopping. But that's precisely the point. Have you _looked_ at Magnus Bane? You're going to need a lot better wardrobe if you plan on snagging _him_ for any length of time," she said.

"Honestly, I think he's quite glad to steal the spotlight from me. Plus, he likes me already, shitty wardrobe and all."

"No, that's not entirely true. Remember, the first night he met you, _I_ dressed you. And he obviously didn't approve of the outfit you wore last night because you came home wearing something that looked like it came out of _his_ closet," she quipped with a knowing smile.

"Well, Iâ€¦I justâ€¦" he was slightly embarrassed still, at his bold gesture of taking the keepsake shirt.

"Whatever, Alec. But you're coming shopping with me so we can vamp up that JCPenney catalog look of yours into something Bane-worthy, 'kay?" Without waiting for an answer, she flitted out the door, hair billowing out behind her. Alec sighed deeply, but knew it was no use arguing. Plus, he wanted to spend time with his sister.

Five hours and two aching feet later, he conceded that he'd had an okay time. Aside from the constant poking and prodding, and Isabelle throwing things at him in heaps, then shoving him into fitting rooms, he'd had a pretty fun day with his sister.

They'd had lunch at the St. Regis, walked through Central Park and yes, Alec had even bought a few things at the stores she dragged him through. He'd managed to hold on to his carefree style, but took her advice on some basic wardrobe do's and don'ts. All in all, he felt a little better about himself, and acknowledged that Magnus would probably be impressed the next time they saw each other.

But that thought had Alec's mind in a state again. He really did like Magnus, and wanted to spend more time with him, but he was also still terrified that the rest of the world might find out. How long could Magnus put up with being his dirty little secret? He didn't have an answer for that. Coming out officially was out of the question. He'd take that secret to the grave if he had to. But he also wanted to enjoy having a relationship, just like everyone else. Even after the fun day he'd had, he was now depressed again.

* * *

**Song for this section: Fembot by Robyn (what Magnus and Camille rock out to in his car)**

It had been a few days since "the night" as Magnus liked to call it. They'd talked nearly everyday, either on the phone or by text, but hadn't seen each other. Magnus got that funny feeling in his gut every time his phone lit up with that LA area code. Alexander Lightwood, adorably sexy soccer boy, had taken over more than 60 percent of his mental capacity. The other 40 was left for Cherry Bomb, clothes, and Camille, each of which were used to at least 30 percent of their own.

"Earth to Magnus!" Camille was waving her hand in front of his face, her double shot macchiato perched securely in the other.

"Sorry, sweetie. My thoughts are all aflutter at the moment," he said, sipping his own mocha with a smile, still thinking about those hard abs pressed against him from above.

"I can see that. Quit fantasizing about Alexander Lightwood's possible oral skills and tell me if this would make me look too skinny." She was holding up a silk chiffon Dior top.

"I wasn't really thinking about his oral skills, but thanks for putting that into my head. Now I'll really be distracted. And yes, it would make your boobs look way too enormous, and thus your waist would look too skinny. Sorry baby, but you shouldn't have been greedy enough for double D's," he said, plucking the hanger from her grasp and putting it back on the rack. "Now this," he said, holding up a black jersey-knit top with rhinestones sewn into the hem and a sweetheart neckline. "This will downplay the assets and bring out your face, and the bling on the bottom will accentuate those thighs you've been working so hard on."

She sighed. "Yeah, I guess you're right," she said, taking the top and flinging it over her arm, where it joined five or six others. "Okay, I'm bored with this one. And I'm starving. Let's hit up Convivio. I'm in dire need of processed carbs," she said, taking her bounty to the register and swiping her platinum for the $1100 total.

The valet brought Magnus' precious purple Porsche around, and they climbed in. As soon as the engine turned on, Magnus' hands went to the radio, turning it up and blasting Robyn, his latest obsession. Camille sang along at the top of her lungs, and they sped off toward their favorite Italian restaurant in Manhattan.

"So what's the deal with him, really?" Camille asked between bites of her lasagna.

"He's utterly adorable, almost too much to handle. And by the way, I love soccer," he said.

"Oh? And what brings this change of heart? Did he make you sit there and watch hours of boys running back and forth, sweaty and grunting, kicking a black and white piece of leather around?"

"Contrary, my love. I love soccer, because any sport that encourages abs like that is a fucking Godsend in my book," he said, a dreamy look on his face as he pictured them again.

"Did he give up the goods on the first date?" she asked, incredulous.

"Oh, no honey. I didn't even to get a full look at them. But I _did_ have them pressed on top of me for an obscene amount of time. I haven't made out like that in ages," he said.

"I'll say. Making out usually lasts about ten minutes before you skip to the main event. How ever did you restrain yourself?" she asked with a smirk.

"It wasn't easy. His tongue _definitely _knows what it's doing. I can only hope to further prove that point soon," Magnus mused, closing his eyes and picturing Alexander Lightwood working that wonderful tongue over his nether regions. He suppressed a swoon. "But I won't rush him."

"Damn. You've turned into an outright chastity advocate, Magnus. I'm shocked. Usually you'd give him a couple hours and if he didn't have you bent over the arm of the couch and screaming, you'd kick him to the curb. That rule, incidentally, I've added to my own repertoire."

"Well, I've turned over a new leaf for this one. He's too delicious to rush it."

"But he's still in the closet, isn't he? I mean, I know he hasn't told the rest of the world, but what about even his family? They don't act like they know."

"I don't know, Camille. I don't know everything about him after one night, you know."

"Well, what _do_ you know about him?" she asked

"He doesn't hate dancing anymore," he said with a wicked smile, and sipped his red wine.


	10. Chapter 10

He'd eventually gotten up the courage to ask to see Magnus again, and now he was on his way to Brooklyn for the second time. This time, there was a lot more anticipation and just a little nervousness.

He pressed the button next to Magnus' name, waiting for that already familiarly enticing voice to summon him up. When it came and the door clicked open, he slid inside, still in the habit of looking around for any curious cameras. He didn't think he'd ever get over the fear that he'd get caught one day.

The elevator door opened and he made his way into the colorful living room. When he rounded the corner, he was taken aback by what he saw. Magnus was dressed in dark skinny jeans, a button down dress shirt that was some mix of charcoal and dark blue, with silvery threads running through it here and there, catching the waning light from the windows. He had on a studded rhinestone belt, and he was barefoot again.

But his wardrobe wasn't what caught Alec's eye. He was draped over the couch in a very casual way, one knee bent and one arm across the low back of the couch. But the way he was situated just looked so sexy and inviting, Alec had to fight to keep himself from running over and lowering himself on top of Magnus.

As he was having this little inner battle, Magnus noticed him standing across the room.

"How many times do I have to remind you that I don't bite?" he said playfully.

"Sorry," Alec said nervously, and made his way over to the furry pink couch. Magnus moved to sit up to make room.

"No, stay like that," Alec said. Magnus gave him a puzzled look, but Alec waved it off. He gently lifted Magnus' stretched out leg and sat down, pulling it and the other one into his lap. "What are you watching?" he said as he looked up at the TV and saw a few familiar faces. "Are you seriously watching Dawson's Creek?" he chuckled, stealing a glance over at Magnus.

Magnus, however, was riveted on him. He kept looking back and forth from Alec's face to his hands, which were resting over Magnus' thighs.

"You're not going to give me a foot massage, are you?" he asked.

"Umâ€¦no?" Alec said, cheeks flaring.

"Good. I was worried I was about to have to pinch myself and get out of a fantasy. But you're really here?"

"As far as I know," Alec said. He bit his lip nervously.

"God, don't do that," Magnus said, his eyes slipping closed.

"What?" Alec asked, afraid he'd pissed the man off somehow.

"Nibble on your lower lip," he said as he opened his eyes again. "Makes me want to nibble on it too." To accentuate his words, his tongue slid out to wet his lips. Alec was at a loss for words, but couldn't help the habit and he took his lower lip between his teeth again.

Magnus gave a sweet half-smile, and beckoned Alec closer with a curl of his index finger. Alec leaned down and Magnus met him halfway, their lips connecting gently. They kissed a few times, without tongue, just sweetly. When Magnus lowered himself back down, his eyes were closed and he had a blissful smile on his face.

"I could get used to that," he said, and sighed. He opened his eyes, and Alec was again mesmerized by their glow. They were so vivid and expressive, and Alec wanted to drown in them. Little did he know that Magnus was thinking the same thing. As it was, Magnus flicked his head a little, beckoning Alec once more. This time, he swung one leg behind Alec, putting him in between his legs, and Alec leaned down to place his head on Magnus' chest. Magnus' hand came up to slide through Alec's shaggy locks, and Alec was in heaven.

"And yes, I am watching Dawson's creek. It's my guilty pleasure," Magnus said.

"Yeah, I guess I always kind of had a crush on Dawson. He's dumb and oblivious most of the time, but I was always rooting for him," Alec returned.

"Oh, please dearie," Magnus said, sounding wounded.

"What?"

"I, personally, have been a Pacey person ever since he was on ice skates in Minnesota." At Alec's very puzzled look, he raised his eyebrows. "You're telling me that you're a sports guy and I'm a veritable queen, and _I've_ seen The Mighty Ducks and you've never even _heard_ of it?" He was downright incredulous.

"Guess so," Alec said, looking sheepish.

"Wow. I can't believe I know about a sports movie and Alexander Lightwood doesn't. This is a day to document in history," he said with an official air.

"You just get deeper and deeper," Alec said with a smirk that Magnus couldn't see.

"Watch what you say around people with exceptionally dirty minds. It might get you in trouble," Magnus said, his quiet laughter rumbling under Alec's ear.

"Oh, I don't think it would be that bad," Alec said. He was shocked at the boldness he'd adopted in such a short time. He would have never been this snippy and playful before he'd met Magnus. But some of the man's carefree, sexy attitude was rubbing off on him.

"Well, that's a good sign," Magnus said.

Alec leaned up to look at him, and was met with a close up of those delicious full lips. Without even thinking about it, he scooted up and placed his mouth over them. Magnus let out a moan so soft Alec thought he might have imagined it. He pulled Magnus' lower lip into his mouth, sucking it gently. This time, the moan was louder.

Magnus pushed on him gently, and Alec jumped back, afraid. But Magnus followed him up, moving Alec so that he was seated properly. Then, Magnus climbed on top, straddling his hips. Alec could feel his already growing erection pressing against his own.

Magnus was running his hands over Alec's chest and moaning against his lips. The vibration was sending chills down Alec's spine. Alec's hands worked their way up Magnus' back, over his shoulders, and into his silky hair. It was like heaven to run his fingers through that hair; he wished he could do it any time he wanted.

Magnus started to grind against him subtly, like he didn't even notice he was doing it. That movement, coupled with Magnus' tongue running along his top teeth and occasionally across the roof of his mouth, had Alec hard as a rock. Without thinking, his hands dropped to the collar of Magnus' shirt. A little lower, and he was at the first button. He popped it from its tiny hole. Then he moved to the next one, popping it out also. He moved halfway down, unbuttoning until he could slide his hands inside and run them over Magnus' chest.

He could feel the smooth skin laying over lean muscle. Magnus was by no means muscular, but he did have a little bit of tone to him. He was downright delicate next to Alec, though. But Alec liked it that way.

"If you keep going, I can't promise you that you'll retain your virtue," Magnus said.

"What do you mean? I've already lost my-"

"I don't count that. Besides, if your heart wasn't really in it, it's not like it stands to count anyway." He paused to kiss Alec again. "But seriously, if you don't stop, I _will_ pop your gay cherry right here and now," he said breathlessly.

Alec sucked in a breath, shocked. Not at what the other man had said, but at the sheer force of desire it ignited within him. He _wanted_ it to happen. But they barely knew each other! No, it had to wait. So, with some difficulty, he removed his hands from the inside of Magnus' shirt and let him climb off of him.

"Wow. That's got to be the first time I've had to stop things myself. I'm usually the one getting chastised about rushing things," he said.

"Sorry," Alec said shamefully. "I just got, caught up and-"

"No, no, darling. It's fine. I just figured you wouldn't want to jump right into that kind of thing, especially when it's your first time, figuratively speaking.

Alec was afraid it would be awkward after the halt, but it was quite the opposite. Magnus turned off the television and hit the touch screen remote, turning on the stereo. An easy going, catchy song erupted from the speakers. Magnus turned it down to a level that allowed for easy conversation.

"So, how've you been? I feel like I haven't seen you in ages," Magnus began.

"I know. I've just been trying to spend time with my family before I have to head back to LA," he said.

"When do you leave?" Magnus asked. Alec thought he detected a hint of sadness in his question, like it was soon.

"Three weeks," Alec answered.

"That's not so bad I guess. You've got a while."

"Yeah."

They slipped into comfortable silence, just enjoying each other's company. They were back to their original position, Alec sitting and Magnus lying with his feet in Alec's lap. After a while, Magnus started to sing along absently, very softly, with the song coming from the stereo. He started out humming, then moved to singing the actual words. It was so soft Alec barely heard. But he heard enough to be pleasantly surprised.

"You have a nice voice," he said.

Magnus stopped singing immediately, and got a look on his face Alec couldn't explain. It was like he'd just discovered he was doing something very prohibited, and he was really regretting it.

"What is it? I didn't want you to stop," Alec said, worried.

"It's nothing," Magnus said, closing off.

Alec was afraid to ask him to elaborate, but after a moment, he couldn't help it.

"You know you can tell me, right? I mean, I told you about Amy," Alec said.

"True. And I appreciate you trusting me enough to share it with me."

"So, don't you trust me?" Alec asked.

Magnus sat in silence for a few moments, and seemed to be gathering his thoughts. Alec let him, waiting in silence for the other man to continue.

"My mother always told me I should sing for a living. She always said I had the voice of an angel and not to let it waste away unused. Funny, that's exactly what I'm doing."

"I don't understand," Alec said.

"I just don't think I could bring myself to do it, considering it was her dream for me, and she wouldn't be around to see it come true." His tone was bitter. Alec waited for him to continue. "My mother was murdered 3 years ago, when I was 21."

Alec was floored. He hadn't seen that coming. "Did they catch the murderer?" he asked.

"Oh, sure. It was my father."

Again, Alec was at a complete loss for words. He had no idea such a tragedy had taken place in Magnus' life, and so recently. His carefree attitude and sarcasm hid it well.

"I had to testify against him. They called me home from school in Florida, and they had me sit in court for three weeks. When it was over, I really had no place to go. I'd dropped out of school and had no real money." He paused, looking down and refusing to meet Alec's eyes.

"So, how'd you get here?" he asked.

"Well, that's sort of a funny story. Remember you asked me why I had a lounge if I didn't plan on opening two or three more?" Alec nodded. "Well, I happened to come into some money, and it seemed like the logical use for it. Well, Camille may have helped with the logic."

Alec waited for him to elaborate. "My mother had her secrets, some of which I was informed of after her death and the trial. I always knew that my mother was from an old family, but she never really talked about it. Eventually I found out, and I guess she never liked to talk about it because she was trying to keep it from my father. She was a Vanderbilt, and she had left me a substantial amount of money in her will. So, I packed up and headed to the city that never sleeps.

"I met Camille at some party and we hit it off pretty fast. She's on my wavelength most of the time, it seems. I was asking her what I should do with the money, since I'd never actually spend that much in my lifetime. She suggested opening a place that I could take pride in and that I would enjoy going to. We both love purple and thus, Cherry Bomb was born."

"Wow. I hate that all that happened to you, but if it's any consolation, you seem to be doing pretty well despite it all," Alec said, looking into his green-yellow eyes.

"Thanks. I happen to agree with you. I always say to myself, 'why dwell?' It's the past, and it's gone. I'm here to live in the _now_," he said, smiling.

"Not to burst your bubble here, but if you're okay with everything, why ban yourself from singing?"

"I knew you were going to ask me that," he sighed. "The answer is, because every time I open my mouth and utter a single note, I think of my mother's smile. She was practically obsessed with getting me started in the music business. I went to school on a vocal scholarship," he said. Alec could see it happening. "I just don't think I could make it through. I haven't actually sung an entire song, let alone performed, since she died. Sometimes I'll catch myself singing without thinking about it, like just now, and then it all comes rushing back."

"But you've got to know it's what she would want you to do. Remember, you said she told you she didn't want you to waste your talent? Why not honor her wishes?" Alec asked gently.

"I just, I don't know. I just can't. If I attempted to actually perform a song, I'd break down and blubber like a baby," Magnus said. "I think I'll stick to venues. It's a fun alternative, don't you think?"

Alec laughed, but in his head he didn't let it go. He sort of made it his personal mission to get Magnus Bane back on track. He hadn't heard a lot of his voice, but what little he heard had mesmerized him. He could only imagine what his pipes sounded like when he really opened them up. It was bound to be phenomenal.


	11. Chapter 11

"Hot damn. Look what the cat dragged in," Camille said, eyeing a spot somewhere by the door.

"Hmm?" Magnus said, not really listening because he was too busy reminiscing about Alec's hungry hands inside his shirt a week ago.

"Honestly, Magnus. Tame the tumescent head for a second and use the one above your shoulders. Jace Lightwood has graced us with his presence again. God, he makes my nipples so hard they could cut glass," she gushed.

"Please. The blonde one is definitely overrated," Magnus said, waving off her infatuation. "I'm partial to the tall, dark, and handsome one with the gorgeous eyes." He leaned back, letting his head fall back and emitting a dreamy sigh.

"If you say so. I, personally, have made it the first item on my bucket list to bed that luscious piece of ass. It's just too good to pass up," she said.

"You and every other bleach blonde in the continental U.S.," Magnus retorted. "I, on the other hand, prefer the untouched, unspoiled one. He's so freakishly adorable, it's a sin."

"Well, I do believe we are a couple of guerilla stalkers. All we need is to call up Raphael in Queens, since he has it in for Isabelle. We'd single-handedly devour the entire Lightwood trio." She grinned devilishly.

"Honestly, I think my pretty jock is the only one left to be devoured in that sense. The other two are way too confident for their own good, which usually leads to a couple free rides around the block anyway. Besides, you think Miss Isabelle was able to resist any of that yummy Italian sausage while she was away? I think not," Magnus said as he sipped his cocktail.

"Oh, hell," Camille said with a scowl.

"What is it, sweetie? Just come to your senses?" Magnus said with a chuckle.

"So to speak. I just noticed the little ginger rat on his arm," she said.

"Aww, she's cute," Magnus said, looking the short redhead up and down. She had that innocent, unspoiled quality that made her undoubtedly easy pray for someone like Jace. Although, Magnus was pleasantly surprised and amused at her actions as they observed the couple. She allowed him to lead her around, but when they got to the bar and he tried to order for her, she let go of his arm and shoved him behind her. Katinka smiled widely as she took their order. She came back with a small glass that looked like Crown and coke for Jace, and a bottle of Asahi beer for the girl. "Cute and feisty," he elaborated.

"She's toast. He'll run through her like a knife through butter," Camille said, appeasing herself with the prospect of hope.

"I'm not so sure. He looks a little uncomfortable. I'm sure he's not used to having his unyielding beauty and authority in a relationship compromised," Magnus chuckled.

"Whatever. I give it a week," Camille said, and went back to her Electric Lemonade. "So, how goes it with old blue eyes?"

"It goes wonderful. And slow," Magnus admitted with a small frown. "I mean, I'm willing to drag out the process for obvious reasons, but my glamorous, leather-clad friend down here usually has other plans. He pitches a fit when he doesn't get his way fast enough."

"Sounds like someone I know," Camille said.

"Oh shut up. You're just jealous I snagged a cutie and you're on banishment leave from your latest fete. Don't worry, sweetie. We'll find you someone new to torture and drain. It's what you do best," he said, brushing her hair back affectionately.

"That's true," she conceded. They spent the rest of the night in their usual way, scoping out and gossiping about the crowd. Camille mostly watched and criticized the little redhead on Jace's arm. Magnus was usually too preoccupied with thoughts of his adorable older brother to care much about her rants.

It was slowly dawning on Magnus that he was in danger of letting this one slip past his carefully constructed barrier of emotion. He mostly kept his conquests behind a wall, refusing to let his feelings overwhelm the physical part of the relationship. They weren't even technically _in_ a relationship, and already he was getting afraid of falling. When he'd told Alexander he had a devastating fear of heights, he wasn't talking about buildings.

Though, try as he might, he was beginning to realize he was in a losing battle, trying to keep this one completely on a physical level when the boy was smashing walls down around his heart without even knowing it.

* * *

**Song for this section: Even Flow by Pearl Jam (What Alec and Jace are playing)**

"Dude, has practice taken over your life? You're so rusty. I'm totally kicking your ass!" Jace taunted as he hit every note in a complicated sequence, causing his points to be triple-multiplied.

"Well, I do have better things to do with my time than perfect my button pushing skills. I definitely can tell what you do in your trailer all day long," Alec said, blundering over the next sequence.

"I always make time to perfect _my_ button pushing skills," Jace returned with a smile. Then, he started to sing along with the song at the top of his lungs.

"You're _both_ pushing _my_ buttons at the moment," Isabelle said from her perch on the couch, arms crossed over her chest, looking bored out of her skull.

"Aw, Izz. Don't be all sullen just 'cause you can't hang with the boys," Jace said, making Alec laugh and mess up again, in turn causing Jace to laugh and taunt him again.

"We're _supposed_ to be having family time," she said. "We don't often reside under the same roof for any lengthy period of time anymore."

"This is family time," Alec said, his eyes intent on the screen trying to keep up with the scrolling notes.

"No, this is a metaphorical pissing contest. I will never understand this game. If you two spent half as much time actually trying to learn to play a real guitar instead of mashing colored buttons on plastic ones, you'd both be accomplished musicians."

"But this is so much more fun," Jace said.

"And your fingers don't bleed near as much," Alec chimed in.

"Speak for yourself," Jace said. "I play hard, bro. My ring finger always gets a blister from the little line on the yellow button." Alec laughed.

As the song ended, they viewed their scores. Jace, having gotten about twice as many points as Alec, dropped his plastic guitar and did a victory dance around the room while the other two rolled their eyes. Alec went and plopped down in the chair next to Izzy.

They were sitting in their parents' media room which, truth be told, looked more like an actual movie theater, albeit a ridiculously luxurious one. The seats were chocolate leather, smooth and buttery to the touch. They all reclined and had cupholders in both upholstered arms. Near the front, there were couches on either side of the 60 by 90 inch screen. The seats were set stadium style, with the very back row being accessed by about 10 steps up. They were seated down near the front, in the chairs between the two couches. Jace was still dancing around in the little open space right in front of the screen.

Isabelle was right, though; they hardly ever got to just hang out around the house together anymore. Growing up, they were nearly inseparable, always running around the house and making mischief together. Now, they were always on opposite ends of the world, crossing paths in midair once in a while, but there was little they could do to see each other in that situation. The last two weeks had been the most fun they'd had in years. With two weeks left, they wanted to make the most of it.

"Well, since you're the pouty one, what did you have in mind?" Jace asked, finally taking a seat on one of the couches.

"I don't know. Maybe we could go-"

"If you say shopping again, I'm out," Alec said, holding up his hands.

"You let her con you into dragging you out to Bloomingdale's? Man, you're gettin' soft," Jace said, throwing a small beaded pillow at Alec's head. Alec, using his ingrained skills and quick reflexes, head butted it and it fell to the floor.

"Hey, that's one day you won't get to spend in _my_ fair company. A day you can never get back," Isabelle said.

"I think I'll live," Jace said. "But seriously, what do you guys want to do now?"

"Well, as I was saying before I was so _rudely_ interrupted," she began.

"Must you channel Michelle Tanner?" Jace said.

"yet _again_. Anyway, I was going to suggest lunch. I'm in the mood for Delmonico's. What do you say, boys?"

"Sounds good I guess," Alec said, his stomach rumbling. Jace nodded, always up for food of any kind, but especially a Delmonico's steak.

* * *

**Song for this section: Jesse's Girl by Rick Springfield (you'll see why later. It's just a fun song, so you can listen to it while they talk, but they don't put it on till later.)**

As they sipped their wine and Jace raved about how much he'd missed this steak, they fell into the old sibling mood again. They laughed and joked, and teased each other. Jace happened to get the brunt of it, for the most part.

"So, how was your _date_ the other night?" Isabelle asked with a smirk.

"It was fine," Jace said, his expression pouty and closed off. Alec snickered along with Isabelle.

"What did I miss?" Alec asked.

"Oh, Jace pestered that poor artist girl until she agreed to go out with him out of pity," Isabelle said.

"It was not pity!" Jace said. "She was just testing herself to see if she could resist me."

"And how did that work out for her?" Alec asked.

"She failed miserably," Jace said with a self-satisfied smile.

"You mean you actually got her to give up the goods? After your little stunt at her show?" Isabelle asked, incredulous.

"Well, not exactly. But she did give me a good night kiss," Jace said.

"Ha! That's all? You're getting rusty Jace Lightwood, if you can only get a good night kiss from a sweet little artist girl. You've slayed the hearts of millions of bunnies who've seen way better goods than you. What's wrong with your game?" Isabelle teased. She shut up after Jace threatened to flick mashed potatoes at her with his spoon. Alec knew he wouldn't do it, but it was still menacing when he threatened, holding it up, cocked and ready.

Alec reflected back on the conversation with some detached interest. He'd noticed something while they were joking around about Jace's latest pursuit. Usually, he'd have turned sullen and distant, listening to Jace talk about the girl he planned on landing this week, but he found he wasn't even bothered. He was even as amused as he put on this time. He thought about why that might be. Could it be that because he'd spent considerable time with someone on his own, he wasn't nearly as jealous? Or was he actually getting _over_ his irrational crush? He hoped it was the latter. He'd like to be done with it all, and live a normal life. Well, as normal as being a closeted star athlete would allow. But for the moment he enjoyed his lack of sullenness and Jace's discomfort.

They spent the rest of their lunch laughing, having the occasional paparazzo request a quick shot, and generally ganging up on Jace. When they were finished, they made their way outside, where the valet had brought Izzy's car around to the front. He handed the keys to Isabelle, bowing a little, and they all climbed into her red 2010 Cadillac CTS-V. It had been a gift from Cadillac for her appearing in their commercial for the car. Alec liked it, and it had power, but it didn't hold a candle to his baby back home. He was really starting to miss it, having been away from it for two weeks now.

"I really don't know how you drive this huge tank in traffic. Unless you use it to run over taxis, it's useless." He climbed in the backseat, but leaned forward in between the front seats to turn up the radio. "What? Oh, no we are _not_ blasting this," he said.

Isabelle swatted his hand away and turned it up louder. "Oh, come on Jace! Find your inner 80's rock star!" she yelled over Rick Springfield's classic guitar riffs. "And I love my car! Your little sardine can doesn't even belong in the same league."

"That's because it would totally leave this hunk of grandma junk in the dust!" he yelled back. Isabelle ceased to acknowledge him, starting to sing along.

Alec had to laugh. They were speeding through lower Manhattan traffic in a huge car, windows rolled down, belting out Jesse's Girl. Even Jace conceded and joined in, unable to resist the sheer adolescence of the whole thing. They were acting like teenagers who'd just gotten their license, out cruising for no reason other than to be seen. They were caught by a few cameras, and Alec was sure their mother would lecture them about their decorum in public (wouldn't want to be lumped in with the Britney's and the Paris's of the world, with their lax morals and such), but for the moment they all enjoyed the chance to act like kids with nothing better to do than have fun.


	12. Chapter 12

"Oh, dear brother?" Isabelle's sweet-talking voice came from his doorway.

"Yes?" Alec groaned from his place on the floor, leaning up against his bed and playing FIFA.

"Are you in the mood to see your luscious lover tonight?" she asked.

"Jesus! Will you watch what you say?" Alec said, throwing down the controller and hopping up to glance up and down the hallway.

"Relax, Jace is sleeping and no one else is home. So, how about it?"

"What did you have in mind?" he asked with apprehension.

"Hitting up his humble digs, of course. I've been dying to go back to Cherry Bomb. That place is off the chain," she said.

"Izz. By the way, you're white. Just thought I'd let you know," Alec said.

"Shut up," she said shoving him down on the bed and sitting down next to him. "So?" she prodded.

"I don't really like that kind of thing, you know that. I'm not the going out type," he said.

"But it's a chance to see your sexy, sexy lover. _And_ to show off your new, Isabelle Lightwood-approved wardrobe to said sexy lover," she said, wiggling her shoulders to emphasize her words.

"He is NOT my lover, Izz. Jesus, I told you I wasn't going to hop into bed with him anytime soon. Give me a break, I'm not Jace. And plus, it's not like I can cuddle up with him in a corner or anything."

"Why not?" she asked.

"Do you have to ask? Can you imagine what would happen?" Alec shuddered at the thought of doing things that even remotely resembled their activities at Magnus' house, right out in public.

"Well then, it's an opportunity to _gaze_ at your sexy _potential_ lover from afar. He's bound to be there with Barbie. And you two can make eyes at each other all night, and other such cuteness," she said.

"What's in it for you?" Alec said, turning to face her and getting suspicious.

"Why can't I just want you to be horny and happy for once?" she asked with a faux innocent look, batting her lashes.

"Because Isabelle Lightwood doesn't work that way."

She sat for a minute, still looking innocent and probably hoping he would just relent, but he stood his ground. She sighed dramatically, rolling her eyes. "Fine. Jace is going out with that little short girl again and he asked me to come and make conversation with her."

"Since when does _Jace Lightwood_ need support on a date?" Alec asked, shocked.

"Since little red riding hood keeps poking holes in his ego," she laughed.

"So let me get this straight: he can't hold an intelligent conversation with an artist, so he needs _you_ to tag along and talk girl talk with her while he sits and looks pretty, and you need _me_ to come along, why?"

"To help me retain my sanity. And to show off that wardrobe I worked so hard to put together," she added. "Please?" she pleaded, batting her lashes one more time. He sighed and rolled his eyes, and she took this as a yes. She jumped up and kissed him on the cheek and hopped out of the room.

"How do I get myself into this shit?" Alec said to no one in particular.

Isabelle returned three hours later to begin his transformation. She had him try on a thousand different outfits, but finally settled on one he actually sort of liked.

He was in black skinny jeans that had a sort of waxy coating on them, making them a little shiny. He also had on a red and black patterned button up dress shirt, and on top of that a black leather blazer, unbuttoned to show the shirt underneath. She handed him a studded belt with a huge belt buckle made of crossed guns done in silver metal, and topped it off with a pair of Wayfarers on his head. She allowed him to pick his own shoes, which turned out to be his usual black boots. She tucked the jeans into them and loosed them at the tops.

She stood back and admired her handiwork with a smile. Alec had to admit he looked pretty awesome. Magnus with all his fashion guru nature would be proud. Just the thought of seeing him, even if he couldn't touch him the way he longed to, put a smile on Alec's face that he couldn't wipe away.

After they'd roused Jace, and he'd thrown on his customary surfer boy uniform and mussed his hair little (and came out looking utterly runway ready), they all piled in Isabelle's car. They were meeting "Clary" at the lounge. When they got there, Jace nearly had a meltdown. She had a guy next to her, so close they were nearly occupying the same space. He looked like a grungy Billie Joe Armstrong wannabe, and Jace was livid. Alec just chuckled under his breath.

"Hey, everyone," Clary said, looking a little intimidated by the three stars in front of her.

"Hey babe," said Jace, coming to put his arm around her. She didn't brush it off, and Jace seemed surprised that she didn't. The other guy just stood there scowling in Jace's general direction while Jace plastered on his pretty boy smile. Alec rolled his eyes and sighed inwardly.

"Um, this is my best friend Simon," she said to the rest of them. Simon waved, and looked at each of them in turn as a greeting. Alec thought Simon was alright, but then again Simon wasn't a threat to _him_. "Simon, this is-"

"I think I know who they are, Clary," he said, looking sheepish. But then he surprised Alec by reaching out his hand towards him. "Alexander Lightwood, of the LA Galaxy? Dude, I'm a huge fan," he said, shaking Alec's hand.

"Thanks, man," Alec said with a smile. Jace just scowled more, probably because he considered this as fraternizing with the enemy. Alec mentally told him to shove it. He did also notice, however, that after his greeting with Alec, Simon's eyes strayed to Isabelle and locked tight. There was absolutely no surprise in that. She tended to do that to unsuspecting guys.

They made their way inside, taking a seat at one of the VIP booths along the wall. Isabelle, Clary, and Jace ordered drinks while Simon and Alec declined. Simon was too busy staring at Isabelle, and Alec was too busy combing the entire room for a glimpse of spikey black hair and a hint of glitter.

"He'll be here," Isabelle said low into his ear.

"I'm not looking for him," Alec retorted, still scanning the room.

"Uh huh. And Jace will score tonight," she said.

"What?" Clary asked.

"Oh, nothing dear." Isabelle picked up her drink and took a delicate sip, smiling around the rim of the glass and turning her head away so the other girl didn't see.

"So, how was Milan?" Simon asked. Seems that everyone knew everything about the Lightwood family these days. This did not put Alec at ease with his own secrets.

"Oh you know," Isabelle said, waving off the comment, as if Simon really did 'know'.

The conversation went on in much the same way, with random awkward silences and Jace trying to engage Clary in a conversation about art, but only ending up sitting there in silence, nodding his head in random places as she talked over his head.

"Come on, Alec," Isabelle prodded in his ear. She was already getting a little tipsy.

"Izzy, you know I don't drink much," he said.

"Oh, quit being an old man and have a drink! That's what we're out for!" she whined.

"Okay, okay! Fine!" he said, throwing his hands up. She looked appeased, and waved the waitress over.

"Okay, um, two shots of Crown, a Long Island, and an Adios Motherfucker," she said.

"Sure thing. Be right back," said the waitress, sashaying off to the bar.

"An Adios what?" Alec said.

"Don't worry, brother dearest. You'll like it. It tastes like 7-up. Harmless. And you like Crown, so I got you two shots."

"TWO? Plus a drink? Izz, I don't know." Alec was getting a little anxious and scared. He hadn't hit the liquor hard since his 21st, and he didn't know how it was going to affect him. But he figured he'd be a good sport for Izzy. She so rarely got to go out and drink, while having to maintain her weight for photos.

When the waitress came back with the shots and two tall glasses, one that looked like iced tea and the other a pale blue color, Isabelle handed her a stack of bills and took the drinks from her tray down to the table.

"Alright, old man. Show us what you got. And this time you don't have stupid excuses about practice and all that bullshit. Go on," Isabelle prodded.

"Oh, he won't do it. He's never been able to hold his liquor," Jace said from across the table, peering up from finally establishing conversation with Clary. Of course, this lit Alec's manly torch.

"Shut up, Jace," he said, and downed the two shots back to back. Then, he picked up the blue drink and took a long swig. It actually tasted pretty good. It chased away the burn of the Crown, and it had a smoothness that made it taste just like soda. "This isn't very strong, Izz. I thought you were gonna hit me hard?"

"Oh, give it a little while. Keep sipping. You'll thank me in about 20 minutes," she said with a smile. He sat back and took another sip. He didn't see how this pussy drink was going to knock him to the ground anytime soon.

Like clockwork, twenty minutes later, he'd forgotten all about his problems with being in the closet, and he'd stopped scanning the room for Magnus. He just laid back on the couch and enjoyed the alcohol induced high. He knew he was completely intoxicated, but he somehow didn't mind.

Isabelle kept throwing new drinks at him, mostly shots, and he took them like a champ. He could tell Izzy was having more fun now that he was joining in and not being a party pooper. He wondered why he was so against it from the beginning? As he sat up and took another shot of Cuervo, he decided it didn't matter. He was living in the now.

Suddenly, the waitress appeared at their table again. Isabelle hadn't ordered anything else, but perched atop her tray was a small shot glass with a chocolate-colored liquid in it, topped with whipped cream.

"What's this?" Isabelle asked.

"A Blowjob," the waitress explained.

"Are you serious?" Isabelle said.

"Quite. But it's not for you," she said. She turned to Alec. "I was told the Blowjob was for the sexy soccer jock with the pretty blue eyes."

He gulped loudly, his senses returning somewhat, sobering him up a little. "What?" he squeaked.

"It's for you. From the man in the corner," she said with an evil grin. His head whirled around to find the culprit. His eyes searched the room, falling on the far corner and eventually locking with the most intoxicating pair of green-yellow orbs he could recall. The owner of those sexy peepers raised and lowered one eyebrow, and winked. Alec's pants suddenly got very tight in the crotch region. But he lost the semi again when he turned back to the drink, remembering the name, and the fact that the waitress had said it in front of everyone.

He didn't notice that no one else had paid any attention except Isabelle, but he was still turning the brightest shade of red. But all of a sudden, Isabelle came to his rescue again.

"Well, I want one!" she whined.

The waitress nodded, heading off to the bar again. When she came back, the shot had been copied. She set them on the low table in front of Alec and Isabelle. When Alec moved to pick it up, the waitress stopped him.

"No, you don't use your hands," she said.

"Excuse me?" Alec squeaked again. How was he supposed to drink it with no hands? Was he supposed to pick it up with his teeth and drain it? But then he'd whipped cream all over his fa-_Oh, God._ He looked back over at Magnus in the corner. He was smiling devilishly, lopsided, with one eyebrow raised as if to say "Go on. What are you waiting for?" Alec's pants were tight again. He couldn't resist that eyebrow.

When he looked back at Isabelle, she was already moving in for the kill. She lowered her head down, opening her mouth wide enough to accommodate the entire rim of the glass, and consequently getting a little whipped cream on the corners of her mouth. She sucked in the white fluffy substance, then leaned her head back, glass between her teeth, and drained it. She lowered her head back down and deposited the glass on the table. The waitress looked pleased. Isabelle turned to Alec.

"What are you waiting for?" she asked. His breathing was increasing, his heart rate going out of whack. He looked back down at the fluffy shot on the table, and gulped again. Would it be so bad, though? He thought. It's just a drink. No one else is paying attention. Well, except _Magnus_.

Then, suddenly, with that thought, Alec was determined. Magnus could sit there looking sexy all day long, without even attempting. But what had Alec done that had blown Magnus away? Bit his lip once or twice? He had to do something cocky and sexy, to get up to Magnus' level. On some wavelength in his brain, he knew it was the liquor talking, making him act so rash, but he couldn't help it. He wanted to see the look on Magnus' face.

So, he leaned down, hands behind his back, and opened his mouth wide. He caught the glass with his teeth, and held it firmly. He leaned up, threw his head back, and let the yummy Irish cream and whipped topping flow down his throat. It was delicious. He wondered if it was like the real thing, and he couldn't wait to test the theory.

When he had drained the shot, he leaned over and set it back on the table with his teeth. When he leaned back up, he turned his head to look across the room. He was rewarded with a very lustful look from the spikey haired man he'd grown so attached to. They locked eyes for a moment, and Magnus' tongue slid across his lower lip, then he jerked his chin forward. Alec took this as an alert that he had whipped cream on his mouth, just like he'd seen on Isabelle. It was inevitable. But he shocked himself and Magnus when he didn't blush at all (other than what was there because of the alcohol) and he seductively let his tongue slip out and run across his lower lip, catching the stray white substance left there. He was rewarded by Magnus' eyes rolling back a little before slipping shut. He could almost hear the moan escape his lips. Alec smiled. They were even now.

Later, he'd look back on the night and be completely horrified by what he'd done. He'd basically written it across the sky that he was hot for the sexy lounge owner. But to his relief, it seemed that no one had caught it on camera, and only Izzy and the waitress had known. And certainly Magnus knew the waitress, because he owned the place, and he'd told her not to tell anyone about _them_, right?


	13. Chapter 13

"You weren't kidding," Alec mused.

"I told you, it's my guilty pleasure. I soak it up as much as I can," Magnus returned.

They were lying on the big pink couch, Alec's head resting in the crook of Magnus' neck, sounds of Dawson and Pacey fighting over Joey in the background. They'd been lying here for nearly three hours, just letting the DVDs play. Sort of listening, but not really watching. They kissed occasionally, but it never got very heavy. They were just enjoying each other's company.

"Well, I think I've soaked up my fair share of Capeside drama for one day," Alec said.

"I guess that's true," Magnus said, touching his little remote and turning off the TV.

"Do you control _everything_ from that little thing?" Alec asked.

"Sure. Everything in the house. I'm lazy by nature. I wish I could just snap my fingers and do things like turn on the lights or the TV. But alas, the man upstairs didn't see fit to give me magical powers, so I make do with this little thing," he said, holding up the little touch screen remote.

Alec chuckled. "Yea, I'd say that's pretty lazy."

"Well, would you rather be up and about doing all this stuff, or would you rather lie here and be lazy with me?"

"Oh, I'll take lazy any day," Alec said. He leaned his face up to Magnus' and their lips brushed together lightly. Alec could feel the smile against his lips, and leaned up more to deepen the kiss. Before long, their lips were moving fluidly together, tongues occasionally slipping in and out, and soft moans causing vibrations between them.

Alec tended to get lost in kissing Magnus. Those full lips brushing against his own seemed to put him in a trance, and he never wanted it to end. He'd never known that being this intimate with a man could be this satisfying. In his mind, the situation was always colored with trepidation. But ever since he'd met Magnus, he'd been opened up to the world of intimacy, _legitimate_ intimacy. This didn't even compare to his little bout with Amy. It was in an entirely different league of happiness. He could be himself with Magnus, like he couldn't with anyone else in the world.

"What are you thinking?" Magnus asked softly when they paused for air.

"Who says I'm thinking anything?" Alec said. "I could just be in a complete haze right now."

"But you're not," Magnus said. He reached up and brushed a dark lock from Alec's forehead, so gently Alec sighed and let his eyes slip shut for a moment before coming back to the present.

"I was just thinking about how happy I am," Alec said.

"In general? With life? Seems an odd time to think about that,"

"No. I mean how happy I am with you," he clarified.

"Are you _with_ me?" Magnus asked. "I mean, in that sense?"

"I think I've come to see it that way. Why? Do you not?" Alec asked, suddenly afraid of the answer.

"No, I do. But I was just wondering what you saw us as, considering no one else knows you to see someone like me as anything," he said.

"What do you mean?" Alec asked, but he already knew.

"I get the impression that the rest of your family is oblivious to your fight with your closet door," Magnus said softly, still running his fingers through Alec's hair. It was so relaxing.

"Isabelle knows. Well, she figured it out. And she knows about me and you, also."

"But no one else?"

"No," Alec said, feeling suddenly ashamed.

"Do you ever plan on telling them? Your family, I mean," Magnus said.

"I don't know. Maybe, I guess. I know it's unfair to them, and it sucks for me, but I'm just afraid. My parents are old fashioned, and they're not very accepting of change in their lifestyle."

"But it's not change. It's the way you've always been. It would just be like weight off your shoulders, and they shouldn't be angry at that, even though they might think they are," Magnus said.

"They will be. I can promise you that."

"But then they'll get over it. You're their son, they'll love you regardless," Magnus said. Alec knew he was right, but the prospect of actually coming out and saying that he was gay in front of his mother and father and Jace, well that was a nightmare that had plagued him for a decade.

"Did you tell your parents?" Alec asked.

"No, not ever outright. But I made no pretense of hiding it. I never brought boyfriends home, but that wasn't because they were _boy_friends. It was because they wouldn't _be_ boyfriends after they'd met my fucked up family." At this, Magnus looked immensely sad. Alec was reminded of Magnus' horrible story about his mother.

"Do you miss her?" Alec asked.

Magnus paused for a moment, and Alec could have sworn he suppressed a soft sob. "Everyday," he whispered. "But she's so far away now. I used to be able to call her up in my mind and see her face. But as time's gone on, she's faded away. I can't get her clear in my head anymore, and that kills me. I don't want her to think I've forgotten her."

"Why do you think that is?" Alec asked. "Do you think about her often?"

"All the time. When I do things around the house I hear her telling me to tidy up, because you never know when company will come. When I'm out shopping with Camille I hear her telling me that what I just picked up is way too expensive to be an article of clothing," he chuckled softly, sadly. "And every time I look in that corner, I hear her telling me to sit down and let it out, but I just can't," he finished, taking a deep breath and letting it out.

Alec looked over to the corner he knew Magnus was talking about, the far corner of the living room that held a sleek white grand piano. He'd always wondered whether Magnus actually played, or if it was just nice dècor because it matched the room.

"She left it to me in her will. It was her grandfather's, and it had been stored away in some warehouse with a thousand other priceless possessions of the Vanderbilts. She knew I'd love it as soon as I saw it, because it's beautiful. And quite an upgrade from what I'm used to," he said, reminiscing.

"When I was younger, about 10 or 11, my mother used to sneak me into the little church in the small town about 15 miles from London. It had a beaten up Steinway that must have been at least 70 years old. But it was tuned, and it played everything but the last C at the top. I would sit there for hours on end at one and two o'clock in the morning, just playing whatever came to mind. My mother would sit in the front pew and listen." He paused, smiling slightly.

"One night, the preacher scared us out of our wits. He appeared around the corner and I got so scared we were going to get arrested. I immediately jumped out of the seat, and ran to my mother's arms. But he looked at me with a pleading expression, and told me to please continue. So, I went back to the bench, and he joined my mother. I forgot they were there after another 10 minutes or so. I think I played and sang Ave Maria five or six times that night, just because I knew it was my mother's favorite."

His voice trailed off as he thought back on the memory, and Alec was mesmerized. In the silence, he could practically hear the strained keys of the piano letting out a lilting Ave Maria, caressed by a young boy's able fingers. He was suddenly very jealous that that preacher had gotten to hear Magnus sing and play, and he never had.

"Did you ever think," he began softly, "that your mother is slipping away because you refuse to do the one thing that would keep her spirit alive?"

"I just can't, Alec. I told you, I've never made it past a couple of notes before I get so damned angry that she's not here to hear it, and I can't do it anymore. Besides, my voice probably doesn't sound the way it used to, being out of use for so long. When I was younger, she would put me in plays and revues all the time, just for an excuse to get me to perform. And I loved it, I loved every minute of being on stage. But I just can't anymore."

Magnus grew silent, and Alec told himself not to push it anymore, because he sounded close to tears. He knew it tore Magnus up inside not to do the thing he loved, the thing that most reminded him of his mother; but he also knew that it would take time before he was comfortable trying.

They lay there in silence, Magnus softly running his nails over Alec's scalp and Alec listening to his steady heartbeat. They drifted off, letting light from the big windows warm their skin.

Alec woke slowly, and immediately noticed Magnus' absence. The windows had gone dark and all the light in the room came from the ambient lights of the city outside. The shock of waking up in an unfamiliar place without the familiar person there was disorienting. He slowly reached up and rubbed his eyes. His head now rested on a plush turquoise pillow. He already missed having Magnus' heartbeat next to his ear. He could swear he heard subtle, disjointed sounds ringing against the walls, caressing his ears.

He sat up and stretched quietly, and rolled his neck a little. He glanced around the room for the source of the noise. Eventually, his eyes fell on the corner where the piano stood. Magnus was seated on the large white leather bench, eyes closed. He was running his hands over the keys, playing an absent note here and there. Alec was so afraid to disturb him, he didn't dare move a muscle. He just watched.

He could tell from Magnus' face that he was warring with himself, fighting the urge to run but also trying to force himself to stay in the seat. His hands ran over the keys like they were snakes ready to strike, like he was afraid of them. But slowly, Alec noticed he got more comfortable. He began to play chords, stringing them together in short melodies. Alec didn't recognize them, but they were beautiful.

When he finally got the courage to stand up, he did so as quietly as he could so as not to startle him. He walked over to stand next to the piano, and placed his hand over the top, feeling the very subtle vibration of each note as Magnus' hands produced it.

Without opening his eyes, Magnus said, "You know, I've never even sat here. This has been in my house for three years and I've never once lifted the cover off the keys."

"Please don't stop," Alec pleaded softly. He thought he might know what that preacher felt like. He was so desperate to hear the rest of what was playing behind Magnus' eyes. He went over behind Magnus, and put first one foot and then the other over the bench, sitting behind him and straddling his hips. He wrapped his arms around his waist and gave him a gentle squeeze. He rested his chin on Magnus' shoulder. "It's just me this time, okay?"

Magnus opened his eyes, and nuzzled his cheek against Alec's. Then he took a deep breath, letting it out in a huff. Alec leaned back a little to let him have some space, and held his breath. Then, Magnus started to play.

He started a song with a succession of notes moving down the scale, and opened into a resonant chord. He repeated the first two or three bars a couple of times, seeming to gather his strength. His playing was soft, barely striking the keys. Already, it was the most beautiful thing Alec had ever heard. Little did he know, the quiet music coming from the instrument was about to be topped.

Magnus began to sing. It was very soft at first; Alec probably only heard it because he was so close. It probably wouldn't have carried throughout the room. Alec was speechless. The voice that filled his ears was sweet and vulnerable, yet full of emotion. As the first verse gave way to the chorus, Magnus' notes came a little stronger. The words were also working their magic on Alec's heart. It was so unbelievably beautiful, he could swear he was dreaming. As Magnus entered the second verse, Alec kept his hands around his waist and let his cheek rest between Magnus' shoulder blades, closing his eyes and just letting the gorgeous sound envelop him.

As the second verse wore on, he could hear the catch in Magnus' breathing between phrases, and the extra vibrato that seeped in, followed by soft sniffles between words. Soon he felt the small, cool drops hitting his hands, but he didn't move. He let Magnus feel what he felt, and just enjoyed the sweet music while it lasted.

If he hadn't been blown away while the soft verses were uttered, he was when Magnus got to the bridge. The first few words were accompanied by slightly staccato chords. But when he got to the last word in the bridge, it was like night and day from the beginning of the song, where he'd kept it so soft Alec barely heard. With the word "sugar", he opened up and hit the most wonderful note, letting it resonate through the entire room, bouncing off the walls and filling Alec's ears. Alec was breathless and speechless all over again. He wasn't sure exactly, but he figured it was the pure and raw yearning in Magnus' voice on that note that finally brought him to tears.

By the end of the word, Magnus brought it back down again. He paused for so long, Alec thought with sadness that the song was over already. But he felt Magnus take another shaky breath, and begin the last verse. His voice was strained with tears, but it didn't make it any less beautiful. If anything, it made it more so. It was so full of raw emotion that Alec lost himself for a moment. By the end of the song, Magnus' voice was barely audible again, tears still falling from his cheeks down onto Alec's hands, with a few of them landing on the keys.

When the room fell silent again, Alec could still hear the ringing of the beautiful notes reflecting off the white lacquer walls. He lifted his face and saw that he'd stained the back of Magnus' shirt with tears. Magnus took another deep breath, seeming to try and calm himself.

He twisted around on the bench, his eyes downcast for a moment before looking up at Alec through his lashes. Alec could tell he wanted to know that everything was okay. He looked so vulnerable, the most unguarded Alec had ever seen him. He usually kept up this wall of sarcasm that even Alec hadn't been able to break down. But this look, this expression of utter openness, brought Alec to his knees.

He reached up, placing a finger beneath Magnus' chin, drawing it up. He brought their lips together firmly, tasting the salt of their tears as his tongue brushed the seam between Magnus' lips. They moved together, Magnus reaching up and twining fingers into Alec's hair, Alec moving his hand to the back of Magnus' neck and pulling him closer.

**Song for this section: Breath Me by Sia (if this were a movie, this song would be playing in the background for the rest of the chapter.)**

He swung his legs off the bench and Magnus swung both over to the back, never breaking the kiss. Alec leaned down and used his toned arms to reach underneath and pick Magnus up, bringing his legs around his waist. Magnus held on to his neck tightly, cool drops still traveling down his cheeks.

Alec made his way to the only doorway out of the living room, assuming it was right. Magnus didn't protest, he figured he was. He carried Magnus into his bedroom, which was beautiful and very Magnus. It was black and white, with little pops of red here and there, and very modern. It also had a wall made entirely of windows. He carried him over to the bed, laying him down gently, and crawling on top of him. Magnus broke the kiss to reach up and pull at the hem of Alec's shirt, ripping it over his head. He leaned up and Alec did the same to his. Magnus reached down and began to tear at Alec's belt and jeans, pushing them impatiently to his knees. Alec kicked them off as he worked on Magnus' pants in the same manner. They fumbled around, still kissing, sometimes gently and sometimes more feverishly.

When they were both naked, they worked their way under the covers, all tangled in each other. Alec placed his hand behind Magnus' head on the pillow and leaned down to kiss him again. He was situated between Magnus' legs, which were bent on either side of him. He was basically on all fours above Magnus, one hand on the pillow and the other still under Magnus' silky strands.

"Alexander, are you sure you want to do this?" Magnus asked. Alec knew he was only asking because it was all new to Alec. And yes, he was afraid, but he couldn't think of a better person to take the next step with. He wasn't sure if he was actually in love with Magnus, but he felt more strongly about him than he had any other person in his 23 years.

"Alec," he said. "Call me Alec."

"Alec," Magnus said, bringing him back down to his lips again.

"And yes, I'm sure. There's no one else," he said.

Magnus smiled. "Well, go slow on me for a little bit. It's been a while," he whispered, desire lacing his words nonetheless. Alec nodded.

Magnus placed his palm to his lips and lathered it with saliva, then reached down and encircled Alec's straining erection. Alec let out a low moan at the sensation. He felt so in touch with Magnus and his emotions at the moment, like they were one person. When he was coated and glistening, he positioned himself at Magnus' entrance.

He stared into those green-yellow eyes for a moment, gathering his thoughts. They still looked vulnerable and fragile, but also determined and strong. Alec kept his eyes on those soft, delicate features as he slowly began to push inside. At first, Magnus' eyes closed and his eyebrows pinched together, and he let out a small whimper. He sucked his bottom lip under his top teeth and the bridge of his fine boned nose wrinkled in discomfort.

Alec went slowly, and eventually Magnus' face started to smooth out. The feeling, to Alec, was exquisite. It was tight and warm, and it sent chills up his spine. Part of it was the physical feeling of pleasure, but the other half was the connection he felt with Magnus. He couldn't think of sharing this moment with anyone else. It was like he was actually a virgin, and he was giving himself up for the first time all over again.

Finally, Alec's thighs hit the back of Magnus'. He stayed that way for a minute, relishing the feeling and giving Magnus time to adjust. After a few moments, Magnus opened his eyes and stared up at Alec with such a loving expression that he was taken aback and almost let the tears fall again. He'd never felt so close to one person in his entire life. Magnus leaned up and closed the few inches between them.

"Alec," Magnus whispered in his ear, and Alec got chills again. His heart felt like it would burst at the sound of his name, the name only those closest to him used, coming from Magnus' sweet lips. "Make love to me, Alec."

"Okay, Magnus."

Alec started to withdraw, and Magnus let out the smallest sigh of pain, but he looked okay so Alec continued. He couldn't hold out anymore, so he turned his head and placed his lips against the other man's again, needing to feel him everywhere. As he pushed back in, he groaned deeply against Magnus' lips, causing a similar sound to erupt from him. It felt so good, here and now, with this man. Alec wanted to melt into him. He pressed his body down on Magnus, and Magnus' arms tightened around his waist.

He began to thrust faster, gauging Magnus' comfort level by the sounds he emitted. It seemed to be okay, so he picked up the pace a little. Magnus moaned louder in pleasure. Alec continued to devour his lips while his lower half pleasured Magnus as deep as he could. He rotated his hips a little, and felt his member brush Magnus' prostate. At this, Magnus let out a cry of ecstasy that Alec echoed. He leaned back down and pressed himself into Magnus' body again.

"Oh, Alec please don't stop. Do it again," he pleaded. Alec did the same movement and was met with another loud cry. He did it over and over, a little faster and a little harder each time, the moans and cries of his name getting louder with each one. He noticed he was emitting some sounds himself, and thought he should be embarrassed, but he just couldn't bring himself to be. He was enjoying this more than anything in his life.

"Magnus- ah God, Magnus- " he worked out.

"Alec, fuck- feels so- good- mmmm" Magnus groaned as he came up and caught Alec's earlobe between his teeth. He nibble softly and Alec thought he might see stars. No one had ever done that, and it was like hitting a nerve inside him that screamed in pleasure. He cried out Magnus' name again, continuing to slide in and out of the luscious tightness below.

"Harder, Alec. Go ahead," Magnus pleaded. Alec took the hint. He pushed in further than before, hitting Magnus' prostate again with more force. He screamed again, causing goosebumps to appear on Alec's skin. He loved that sound, and wanted to make it come again. He continued, and he heard it again and again, again and again.

He was getting close, feeling the muscles coil in his abdomen. He was leaning down and resting his forehead on Magnus' shoulder, their sweat mixing like their moans. He was whimpering and sighing, working towards his orgasm with full force. He could tell Magnus was getting close, too, by the sounds he was making. His own erection was being rubbed between their stomachs with alarming friction. He knew they both would not last much longer.

"Alec, I'm- almost- " Magnus gasped.

"Me too, Magnus. Wait for me," he said into his ear.

With a few more thrusts, Alec gave it his all. One last time, he slammed in and Magnus screamed, and Alec felt hot liquid shoot onto his chest just as he let himself go. His eyes rolled back in his head and he was overtaken by bliss for a few moments. He collapsed down on top of Magnus, who wrapped his arms around his back and held him tight, like he would never let go.

They stayed that way for a long while, just soaking each other in. Alec didn't think he'd have the strength to move again, ever, but he was perfectly content with remaining in his current position for the rest of time. He was on cloud nine, and never wanted it to end.

But alas, sore knees and Magnus' abused backside called for a change in position. He pushed himself up on his hands and began to slowly withdraw while Magnus winced, but smiled to show he wasn't in too bad of shape. When he was fully out, Alec leaned down to place a sweet kiss on his nose, then rubbed his own against it in an Eskimo kiss. Magnus chuckled softly, and Alec smiled wider.

Alec lay down next to Magnus, and he rolled over to place his head on Alec's chest. Alec reached up and put his fingers through black silk. With their hands clasped over Alec's heart, they fell into exhausted, blissful sleep.


	14. Chapter 14

Alec awoke to light streaming through the wall of windows and soft, jet black hair splayed over his chest, accompanied by the gentle vibration of Magnus humming to himself in that beautiful voice. He stayed quiet for a minute, not letting Magnus know he was awake, just to have another listen at that sound. He'd have to record it sometime so he could take it back home with him. After a couple of minutes, he realized he recognized the song.

"You are really obsessed with that show," he said when Magnus paused.

"Come again?"

"Has it penetrated your being so much that you can't think of a better song to wake me up with than overplayed 90s folk rock?" he asked playfully, running his fingers through Magnus' hair and relishing the feel, catching a few knots and gently releasing them.

"Mmm," Magnus sighed, and Alec could hear his smile. "I believe that was all you, my dear. You penetrated my _being_ enough that there's no room for anything else.." he trailed off as he leaned up and rubbed his nose softly against Alec's in an Eskimo kiss.

Alec moved in and closed the distance between their lips, keeping it light. They shared a few chaste kisses before Magnus rested his head down on Alec's chest again.

"I like the song because it's a beautiful contradiction," he said after a moment, running his fingers lightly up and down Alec's torso.

"How so?" Alec asked. He knew the general melody of the song and the chorus, but he'd never actually listened that closely to the words.

"Well," Magnus began, "the melody and back beat are rather catchy and light, pulling you in with the repetitive mandolin, which is generally used in more uplifting songs. But the words are so full of anger and vengeance. The woman is so incredibly fed up with her life and everything in it that she burns her house down, without much regard for the rest of the inhabitants. She only hesitates for a second, during the bridge, but after that, she's smiling about her life burning to the ground."

"You got all that from a song?" Alec asked, amazed. "How long have you studied music?"

"I told you, I went to Florida on a music scholarship. But it's not _studying_ music that makes me appreciate it. Appreciating the music made me want to study it. Music has always been how I defined myself. I mean, I had other loves, like clothes and going out and glitter. But music has always been my release, my sanctuary. Until my mother died, there wasn't a day that went by that I didn't sing enough notes and lyrics to fill an album. But after I lost her, I lost the will." He finished with a small sigh of remembrance and sorrow.

"But you found it again," Alec said, sounding soothing and hopeful. "Magnus, you have the most beautiful voice I've ever heard. It's surreal."

"Stop it. Don't start polishing the Grammy or anything," Magnus joked in an odd voice. It took Alec a second to recognize the tone, because he was so used to using it himself: a mix of embarrassment, nervousness, and bashfulness. He'd never once heard Magnus say a single sentence tinged with less than the utmost confidence. Christ, the first night he ever met him, he'd told him how big he was. Alec smiled a little when he thought back on it, even though it still embarrassed him a little.

"You weren't lying, you know," he said after a few moments of silence.

"I don't do that often, but remind me what I didn't lie about this time," Magnus said lazily.

"When you made a reference to..." he trailed off, suddenly not wanting to say this aloud. His nature was catching back up with him. "a certain number of inches," he finished.

"Oh, that. I didn't mean to come at you so hard that night, but I'm kind of glad I did. And yes, I'm proud of it, so I let the world know. Especially ridiculously hot soccer boys in dark corners," he said seductively, leaning up to kiss Alec's jugular.

He rolled off his side of the bed and made his way to the bathroom, presumably to shower. He looked back over his naked shoulder and raised that God forsaken eyebrow. Alec felt his groin twitch.

"You coming, blue eyes?" Magnus asked seductively.

Alec wanted to, but honestly, he enjoyed lying in Magnus' bed, and he wanted to stay a little longer. Plus he was exhausted from the night before, and he decided to give Magnus his privacy.

"You go ahead. I'm too comfy," he said with a smile, rolling over and snuggling back into the fluffy comforter.

"Suit yourself," Magnus said. He blew a kiss over his shoulder and Alec blushed as he watched Magnus' glorious backside walk away from him into the bathroom, closing the door behind him. Alec settled into the softness of the bed, content.

He awoke to the sound of the bathroom door opening again and looked over at one of the most striking things he'd ever seen, besides Magnus in the throes of passion. He was topless, with a purple towel wrapped loosely at his hips. His face was devoid of any makeup, and his hair was dripping onto his shoulders. Alec was riveted as he watched little rivulets of water trace paths from the ends of his hair, to his shoulders and down his chest to be caught by the towel just before they reached the promised land.

"See something you like?" he asked with a smirk. Alec blushed at his open gawking. He'd never been one to actually check out someone, let alone when they were fully capable of catching him.

"It's okay, you know. I'm glad that at least, on a superficial level, my looks keep you coming back for more."

"You know it's not just your looks, Magnus," Alec said with more seriousness than he meant. The moment had just taken over him. He put on a smile to lighten the mood again. "Hungry? I can make a mean omelet."

"Can you make me a nice one?" Magnus teased. Alec nodded. He rolled out of bed with a groan, instantly feeling the cold. Magnus saw him shiver, because he beckoned him over. When Alec made it to him, he opened the towel and wrapped it around Alec's waist, pinning them both in and putting their nether regions in unbelievably close contact. Alec moaned as his lips met Magnus' for a long, slow pull. He was instantly warmed. After a moment, he pulled away and grabbed a pair of pajama pants that Magnus produced from a large chest of drawers.

He made his way to the kitchen while Magnus got dressed. He started hunting around for ingredients to a Colorado omelet, his favorite. He opened the refrigerator, pulling out the carton of eggs, an onion, some ham, and other ingredients.

"Hey, Magnus! Where are the pans?" he yelled behind him.

"In the bottom next to the dishwasher!" was the reply.

Alec squatted down and opened the cabinet door to grab a skillet. All of a sudden, a small white blur came straight at his face with a screech, claws extended. Alec yelped and fell back on his butt, then further lost his balance and landed flat on his back. The tiny thing scurried over his chest and darted out of the room. Magnus came in a few seconds later to find Alec lying on the floor with a greenish expression.

"I think you have a rat problem, Magnus," Alec said as Magnus helped him up.

"What?" he said with an odd look.

"Something just came at me out of the cabinet. It was white. I couldn't see if it had an icky rat tail, but I'm sure that's what it was. It was vicious!"

He was met with the loud sound of Magnus, doubled over in laughter. When he looked up again, there were tears in his eyes and he couldn't stop. When he'd finally gotten hold of his senses, he walked over to Alec and put his arms around him, placing a soft peck on his nose.

"Oh my GAWD! You are too cute!" he said, still laughing.

"Umm?" Alec was at a loss. He wondered for a moment if he was crazy.

"And he's not vicious, I can promise you that. He's terrified of new people. You probably scared him to death."

"Umm...who?"

"Chairman Meow." He said it like it was common knowledge and Alec might be a bit of an idiot. "My cat," he clarified.

"Cat? You mean kitten, right?"

"No. He's pretty ancient, that one. As far as cats go, anyway. And he's shy," Magnus said, pointing to the doorway of the kitchen.

Alec looked where his finger indicated, and saw a small white face with a tiny pink nose and green-yellow eyes that seemed too big for its face, but seemed to only add to its cuteness. _That_ is what just jumped at him? He was sure it had been a hostile rodent. But that looked like a miniature white Persian, without the haughty air. It was nothing but a little ball of fluff. And it was looking at him as if he'd just spanked it for no reason. If cats could be said to have eyebrows, Chairman Meow's were knit up in a pleading expression of hurt.

"Aww, I'm sorry, little guy." Alec held out his hand, wondering if they cat would come and lick it, and they could be okay with each other. But at his words, Chairman Meow let out a disgusted sniff and turned away into the living room, leaving the two men standing in silence.

"Oh, he's a little sensitive, too. He hates being called little. I tell him to look in a damn mirror, that he's the size of a cell phone, but he just won't listen."

Alec was too enamored by the fact that Magnus was talking about the cat like it was a real person to notice that Magnus was _talking about the cat like it was a real person._ He couldn't help the smile that spread across his face. He went back to preparing their breakfast, internally vowing to win back Chairman Meow's esteem, if only to be closer to Magnus, since this cat seemed to be just as much a friend as Alec was. And Alec was definitely hoping to be more than a friend.


	15. Chapter 15

Alec walked through the door to his parents' house, still groggy from the lazy morning he'd spent with Magnus. He was still riding some kind of high. It felt good, and he didn't see any point in chasing it away at the moment.

He shuffled through the house, making his way up the stairs to his room when he heard loud rock music coming from below. He figured Jace was rocking away in the media room, as usual playing Rock Band and head banging until he nearly got a concussion. Alec decided to go see about him before he got too out of hand.

When he entered the room, however, he stopped short. He found a lot more than Jace. Oh, he was there, shredding on his plastic guitar like Alec had predicted, but there were three other people in the room with him that Alec certainly had not expected.

Isabelle was perched on one of the sofas, examining her nails and not really paying attention to the room; she hadn't even noticed him in the doorway. Jace's new obsession, that little redhead, was trying desperately to play the bass and sucking royally at it, but all the while giggling like a little schoolgirl, causing Jace to tease and heckle her more each time she messed up. The girl's friend, (Sean? Seth? Stephen? Something) was playing the plastic drums fairly well, only missing beats when he stole a look at Isabelle in the corner.

The song came to a close and Jace looked up to find his brother standing in the doorway looking very uncomfortable. "Hey! Come to get your ass kicked?"

"You wish," Alec said, plopping down on the sofa next to Isabelle, who smiled an odd, knowing smile at him, but said nothing. "You do know that having the talent to press little plastic buttons expertly isn't all that impressive, right?"

"You're just saying that because I always beat you."

"You'd better watch out," Alec said to Clary. "He'll rope you in for a few songs and hustle you like there's no tomorrow. Then he'll steal your dignity and run. Happens every time," he said with a chuckle. Now Jace was looking at him funny. What was _with _everyone?

"Um, what's the matter?" what's-his-name (Simon! That's it!) seemed to notice the awkwardness in the room as well.

"Alec's making jokes," Isabelle said uncertainly, abandoning her nails for the moment to stare at her brother. "You never make jokes."

"That is so not true," he defended.

"No, it's perfectly true. I've never heard you say one even slightly teasing-slash-funny thing in your life," Jace said, putting down his guitar and folding his arms across his chest. "_And_ you didn't come home last night. The world has turned upside down," he said with a smirk. Alec's face grew red.

"Okay. See ya," he said quickly, making to get up and dart out the door.

"That's right! Oh my God I knew something was off!" Isabelle exclaimed with a delighted smile, completely ignoring Alec's statement. Alec was still trying to make his way quickly out the door.

"I KNEW IT! You got LAID, didn't you?" Jace exclaimed, pointing his finger at Alec's retreating form. "You mean you're not a total prude? Hey! Come back here!" But Alec had made a run for it up the stairs and behind his locked bedroom door. Jesus, that was too much. How could they possibly know? I mean, he told jokes every once in a while. How was today any different? He sighed to himself as he dropped down onto his bed.

* * *

**Song for this section: Dirty Little Secret by All-American Rejects (reasoning is obvious)**

"Personally, I think he's an inconsiderate asshole," Camille said as she speared another piece of spinach from her salad plate. "He never even called to tell me our date was canceled."

"Oh, sure he is. God forbid he cancel his date with his mistress on account of his wife coming home early from the Hamptons," Magnus retorted, taking a sip of his red wine. His tone was light; it was hard not to be, after the night he'd had. He was still a little sore, considering they'd kind of skipped the preparation stage, and it had been a good year and a half since he'd been on the receiving end of a sexual encounter, but he was ecstatic nonetheless. Not even Camille's foul diva mood could upset him, and she seemed to notice.

"Oh, I'm sorry princess. Am I raining on your sunshine parade? What's with you anyway? You look like you just found out they're giving away free MAC."

"Are they?" he asked with a smirk.

"What does it matter to you?" she said.

"Good point," he conceded. "Well, if you _must_ know," he began, knowing that she knew he was dying to tell her anyway. "I had the most amazing sex of my _life_ last night, and I'm still a little high on spunk, if you know what I mean." He sat back with his wine glass, assuming the pose of a king on his throne.

"You're kidding. Lonely Boy gave it up already? Jesus you're a scheming whore, corrupting the poor boy like that," she said with an unaffected air.

"You really need to stop watching Gossip Girl reruns. And I did _not_ corrupt him. He initiated, and he pitched. Granted, it's been a while for me, and he was rather, thorough with his thrusts. But honestly, I didn't notice the consequences of _that_ until this morning."

"Wow, Magnus. You gave up your dominant nature just to please the cutie jock? I'm impressed."

"Oh, honey. By _no_ means did I give up my dominant nature. I just put it in my back pocket for a while until I'm sure I won't scare him off. He's virgin ass, remember? Christ, I'm the first pretty boy he's ever even kissed. I figured I'd let him on easy."

"Well, I'm sure he'll run screaming for the hills when he finds out you want to violate him with that massive tool of yours." She had seen said tool many times, on random occasions. Like when Magnus just wanted to conserve water when he spent the night at her house once in a while, so he would just climb in behind her in the shower and shove her over.

"He didn't seem afraid of it last night. In fact, he complimented it."

"That's probably because it wasn't rocket launching into his poor little virgin rear end. Just you wait, Magnus. He'll be a crying little pussy when you shove that thing in. Have some tissues handy."

"There is not a damn thing that's pussy-related about him. Which is, incidentally, why I like him in the first place," Magnus said with a snicker.

"Well, here's to you not fucking this one up. He seems to make you a lot less bitchy, so power to him." She raised her glass and clinked it with Magnus'.

When they'd taken their customary sips and set their glasses down, Magnus said, "We're practically an item. We need a song."

"You have a song already. It's by All-American Rejects," she retorted with an eyebrow raised in challenge.

"Oh, who gives a shit if he wants to stay shoved back in the corner of the closet. I actually kind of like sneaking around the paparazzi. It's dirtier that way," Magnus said. In truth, it annoyed him a little that they couldn't be "together" in public, but it was also hot, wondering if and when they would get caught. Magnus had always been a little bit of an exhibitionist, and he thrived on kink. He didn't mind being Alec's dirty little secret all that much. He was already thinking of ways to bend the rules, without breaking them. Especially the no public relations one. He smiled a devilish smile to himself.


	16. Chapter 16

Alec was actually looking forward to this night. He knew he was slightly crazy for that, but what the hell. He was still riding the high of being with Magnus two days ago, and he wanted to look at that gorgeous body and picture what was underneath those designer clothes, now that he had a true-to-life image in his head. Isabelle had been a little floored when he'd agreed to go to Cherry Bomb the first time she asked, even though she knew about him and Magnus. She was under the impression that a club was a club was a club to Alec, and that he'd hate it anyway, but she was wrong.

He also actually put a little thought into his wardrobe for the evening. He found himself wanting to impress the man who'd become a sort of fashion icon in the New York press, and he found he would go to great lengths to accomplish that.

Tonight he was sporting low slung, dark wash jeans that pooled at his feet over sleek brown Ferragamo shoes. He had on a plain white v-neck t-shirt that stopped just above his large brass belt buckle, which was styled to look like a rose tattoo. Over that was a chocolate brown leather bomber jacket, the sleeves pushed up to about three-quarter length, showing off his muscular forearms. He'd adorned his neck with a leather cord necklace, a two-inch sterling silver dagger dangling at the center of his collar bone. He had to admit, he looked pretty hot. He blushed just thinking it.

He made his way downstairs, finding Jace and Simon sitting in awkward silence in the living room. Not even those two could ruin his mood.

"Well, don't you look pretty," Jace taunted. He was in his usual carefree attire, but had dressed it up tonight with a loose tie and an open blazer. He still sported his ripped up jeans, and under those was a pair of faded Doc Martins. Alec wondered how on earth women found him attractive in that. But alas, he'd found Jace attractive in that, so he kept his mental mouth shut.

Instead, he responded with a simple, "Thanks." At this lack of embarrassment at his teasing, Jace huffed and shut up. Alec smiled to himself at his small victory.

Simon, on the other hand, looked even worse than Jace. He had on a faded black t-shirt with tour dates for Pantera down the back. He had on black skinny jeans and multiple chains at his hips, hanging off his studded belt. He topped it off with dirty high top Chucks, which he'd stuffed his jeans into. His hair was messy, and not in a good way. He looked like they were going to a grunge concert, and he didn't give a damn what he looked like. To each his own, Alec thought. Musicians were their own breed.

After a few more minutes of awkward small talk, the girls descended the stairs. Alec wanted to protest at Isabelle's barely-there Dolce and Gabbana dress, but held his tongue, recalling that she was 21 and she could do as she pleased. Clary was a bit more conservative, although she had on enough eye makeup for both of them. But he couldn't deny the light that sparked in both the other boys' eyes when they caught a glimpse of the ladies. He would never understand the pull they had, and frankly, he didn't care. He was ready to get going, so he could see _his_ beautiful vision.

Hodge drove them to Cherry Bomb, talking animatedly with Clary the entire way, annoying Jace to the gills. Hodge was a bit of an art freak, so obviously he'd hit it off with Clary. Alec kept smirking at Jace's martyred expression, while Jace threatened multiple times to pound his stupid smirking face in. And yet, still, it didn't ruin his mood.

They arrived at 11, and the place was packed. They slid past the line, of course, and made their way inside. Alec's eyes immediately darted to Magnus' usual corner, but he was overcome with disappointment when he saw no one there. Not even his blonde friend. Could they have decided not to come tonight? He knew Magnus didn't oversee his establishment every single night, but Alec had assumed the odds were in his favor. He hadn't called Magnus today, because he'd wanted to surprise him by coming here.

As the rest of them made their way to a VIP table, Alec sullenly ordered a drink from a tall brunette waitress. She gave him a small wink. He kind of expected it, since he was the only one without a "date" and it wasn't public knowledge that he didn't bat for Team Pussy.

When she came back with his Crown and Coke, she brushed his hand slightly. He gave a terse smile, one that said, "Not my type", and she walked away with a sullen expression. He felt bad, but not bad enough to forget that he was disappointed that Magnus wasn't here. This was going to be a long ass night.

An hour into the evening, Alec couldn't take the idle chatter anymore. He'd barely said a word since they'd gotten here; he'd been listening to Isabelle not quite shove away Simon's advances, and Clary giggle every time Jace uttered a single syllable. He'd liked Clary before, when she'd been immune to Jace's charm. Now she was no different than any other of the random girls he brought home, as far as Alec could tell.

He excused himself and rose to his feet, making his way toward the bar to get another drink. He was going to need a lot of these to make it through the night. He procured another Crown and Coke from the pink haired bartender, and worked his way over to the dark corner a little ways away. He smiled to himself and let a slight tremor run down his spine as he thought of the last time he'd been in this very corner; that was the first night Magnus had spoken to him, whispering low in his ear and causing his groin to twitch.

"You- you look positively fuckable," a seductively familiar voice whispered in his ear. At first, he thought he had gone too far in his reminiscing, imagining Magnus into existence. But then he felt long, thin fingers trail up his back underneath his jacket, and he let out a soft sigh. He turned around and saw Magnus, clad in all black and looking absolutely sex-fiendish.

He wore a black button up shirt, sleeves rolled up to just above his elbows, underneath a black pinstripe vest. The shirt was open about a quarter of the way down, to showcase the dozen or so necklaces that swung back and forth, caressing his tanned chest with every movement. He had on black slacks that looked in danger of falling low enough to show off that glorious organ Alec knew resided underneath them. Those were shoved into the tops of knee high black boots. His hair was spiked in the back and hung over his eye in the front.

He compensated for his monochromatic wardrobe with bright lime green eyeshadow, covered with purple glitter. Dark purple liner rimmed his intoxicating eyes and gave way to thick, mascara enhanced lashes. Alec's breath caught at his beauty. He wanted to turn his "fuckable" comment around on him.

"Watch what you do in such a public place, Magnus. You might put me in a situation I can't talk my way out of," he said while looking around for any prying eyes.

"Looks like you've already got a situation, sexpot." Magnus was looking down at Alec's crotch, which was tented slightly with his growing erection. It was amazing what just looking at Magnus could do to Alec's cock sometimes. His face grew a little red, but he didn't let it bother him. He just soaked up the moment.

He suddenly wanted to tackle Magnus right there, in front of everyone. But he held himself back, remembering what the consequences of that would be. His erection lost a little steam at the notion, but it was right back up when Magnus turned around and rubbed his supple rear end against Alec's crotch, grinding once to the music. Alec let out a moan, and he was thankful for the pounding bass.

"Magnus, you know we can't. Not here," he pleaded, wanting him to stop while at the same time not wanting him to ever quit.

"Is it _here_ you have a problem with?" Magnus asked over his shoulder. "Well, we can fix that." Right next to him was a door marked KINGS. Magnus opened it and peeked his head in, yelling something Alec couldn't discern. As Magnus backed away a little from the door, a disgruntled teen shoved past, giving Magnus a rude look by which, it seemed, Magnus was entirely unaffected.

The sparkly one stepped inside the door, looking at Alec expectantly. When Alec didn't react fast enough, Magnus grabbed the collar of his jacket and yanked him inside. They were in the restroom, it seemed. Well, it had all the trimmings of a restroom, but it also had a small seating area and a huge mirror on one side.

Before Alec could take in any more of the surroundings, Magnus had him shoved up against the door and his lips were crushing Alec's. Alec forgot all coherent thought when Magnus shoved his tongue inside. Jesus, the things that tongue could do inside his mouth. It was enough to make him come, just feeling that able muscle sliding in and out of his pliant lips.

They both moaned and grunted, the bass outside still drowning most of their noise out. He was so absorbed in Magnus' lips and tongue, he didn't notice that his hands were ghosting down Alec's torso to his belt buckle.

"God, I want to spank you with this and leave a rose imprint on your ass," he said into Alec's mouth. This only made Alec moan louder. He hadn't thought he'd be into kinky stuff like that, plus dirty talk, but he found out he liked it, a lot. Magnus started to undo his belt; he had the button on Alec's jeans popped before Alec regained his senses.

"Magnus, we can't, do, not here," he panted, still needing the friction he knew was coming but unable to get over his fear of getting caught.

"Oh, baby. I wouldn't dream of it. You worked me over real good the other night," he said into Alec's neck, where he nipped with his teeth between words, causing sounds of ecstasy from Alec. "And I don't think my poor underused ass could take your throbbing cock pounding again just yet." It shocked Alec how explicit and graphic Magnus could be, but it shocked him more that he didn't blush. He was so incredibly turned on by that voice saying all those naughty words like cock and ass and _throbbing_. His cock was definitely throbbing now.

"Well, then, what are you-" he still couldn't form sentences as Magnus' lips went to the sensitive spot just below his ear.

"I thought you might settle for a little gift. A thank you, of sorts, from yours truly, for being such an amazing fuck." Jesus, if he didn't stop talking so dirty, Alec would come in his pants pretty soon. It was something about that velvety voice, the one that could be so sweet and sincere when he wanted, saying all those distasteful words and phrases that drove him to the edge.

"And, if it's getting walked in on that you're worried about, we can solve that real quick." He let Alec go, his undone pants sagging a little. Magnus walked over and grabbed a purple upholstered chair and shoved it underneath the doorknob. Then he turned back to Alec and led him to a bare wall next to the door. "Now, just relax and let me show you what else this," he let his tongue dart out and lick his bottom lip, "is good for."

With one last deep kiss on Alec's lips, Alec watched with rapt attention as Magnus lowered himself down onto his knees in front of Alec. He pushed aside the dangling belt buckle and lowered the zipper, giving Alec's painful erection a little more room to move. In the next instant, Magnus had pushed his boxers down and Alec's straining cock sprung free.

Magnus gave Alec a look up through his onyx lashes that looked childishly innocent and ridiculously seductive at the same time. He held Alec's gaze as he slowly let his lips wrap around the tip. When he had it placed how he wanted it, he grabbed Alec's ass, squeezing his cheeks, and shoved him all the way back in his throat.

"Holy mother fuck!" Alec cried. It was the most extraordinary feeling he'd ever felt. Magnus' tongue in his mouth had nothing on this. He could feel it swirling around the base, while the tip was hitting the back of Magnus' throat repeatedly. He looked down, not wanting to miss this incredible event.

He saw Magnus slide his mouth back up near the tip, leaving Alec glistening with saliva to the base. He swirled his tongue around the head and took him all the way in again, while Alec's head tilted back in utter pleasure. He could feel Magnus' throat muscles as he made a swallowing motion, tightening his throat around Alec. Alec kept letting out loud moans and soft whimpers as Magnus worked his magic. Sometimes, he would let his teeth graze against Alec's shaft, eliciting a slight involuntary buck of his hips.

Alec could feel the tightening in his abs, knowing his release was coming soon; And this one would be a big one. All of a sudden, he felt one of Magnus' hands cup his balls, the other working its way into his jeans, pushing them down a little. It snaked between his legs and around, and without warning, Alec felt a finger penetrate him.

"Jesus Christ! Ohmygod...please don't stop...feels so fucking...good!" he was past coherent sentences now.

"You like that, baby? That's only one. You want more?"

"Fuck, yes! Aaahh shit!"

He could feel Magnus smile around his dick as he felt the slight pain of another finger pushing inside. It did hurt a little, but Magnus didn't go very far and his fingers were long and thin. After a few seconds, the pleasure grew nearly unbearable.

"Magnus- Magnus- I'm gonna- ugh- aahh!"

Magnus pulled off for a split second. "Go ahead, baby," he said. Those were the magic words, apparently. Alec screamed as he shot hot liquid down the back of Magnus' throat. His whole body seemed to shake with his orgasm. The aftershocks were still racking through him when Magnus got to his feet and refastened Alec's jeans and belt.

Alec was overcome by the sheer hotness of Magnus' pale pink gloss smeared around his mouth, and the unmistakable feeling of some of it being left over on his slowly deflating cock. Magnus didn't help the situation by licking his lips slowly and letting his eyes slip closed, making it look like he was tasting the sweetest candy and it was pure bliss.

"Mmm. You taste so fucking good, baby." Another shiver cut through Alec.

"Magnus- that was- " apparently his sentences were shot for the rest of the night.

"I know. I've got a few tricks up my sleeve, just to keep you coming back for more." He smirked as he walked over and removed the chair from under the doorknob, unlocking their little sanctuary. "I'll go and give you a few minutes to recuperate from the 'Bane-job'. It's the best, I'm told. And only a select few will ever know it." With a short, chaste kiss on Alec's cheek, Magnus swept out the door.

It took Alec a good twenty minutes to recover from the shaking in his thighs. He supposed that was good, because that meant it was more time in between them coming out of the restroom, thus less chance of anyone suspecting anything. When he got back to the table with the others, he was utterly ecstatic that they were so absorbed in their conversations (and so tipsy) that they didn't notice his just-_blown_-flush. He stole one glance to the corner, and his groin twitched as Magnus raised his glass, licked his lips, and winked.


	17. Chapter 17

"What do you want to eat?" Magnus called from the kitchen.

"I have the most incredible craving for a grilled cheese," Alec said, coming up behind Magnus and putting his arms around his waist and his chin on his shoulder (which required, truth be told, standing very high on his tippy toes).

"Ask and you shall receive, sweetness." Magnus turned his head and kissed Alec's cheek at an awkward angle, and Alec let him go. He started milling around the kitchen for all the ingredients, turning on the stove and dropping a freshly buttered piece of bread into a small skillet.

Alec shuffled over to the table and sat down. His eyes caught a small flash of white in his periphery, and he looked over to the entrance to the kitchen. Cowering around the corner and looking at him like he was his worst nightmare come to life, was Chairman Meow. He and Alec had their little altercation in this very room last week, and it seemed the poor cat was terrified of entering when Alec was present.

"Are you going kiss and make up, or are you just going to sit there staring him down until he crawls up to you and apologizes?" Magnus huffed.

Alec was about to make a remark to his own defense, like that the cat refused to come near him anyway. But when he tore his eyes from the cat's, he noticed Magnus was looking at Chairman Meow with a very stern look, like he was scolding a child. Alec bit back a laugh. It was so damn cute that Magnus talked to his little cell phone sized cat like he was a real person.

Magnus kept looking expectantly at Chairman Meow, hand on his hip and foot tapping like an exasperated mother. He and the cat stared each other down for another minute or so, and Alec wondered for a second if Magnus actually expected the cat to talk back.

But then, as if he'd understood every word and that he'd been rude to the guest and he needed to apologize, the tiny white cat trudged up to Alec's feet and looked up with the cutest face Alec had ever seen. He leaned down and offered his hand to the cat, half afraid he was bluffing and that he would claw it raw. But to his surprise, Chairman Meow's rough pink tongue slid over the pad of his index finger in customary feline apology. He looked back up at Alec, and Alec couldn't help it anymore.

He smiled and laughed and picked the small cat up, startling it a little. But Chairman Meow did not look hostile anymore, and Alec nuzzled his nose with an Eskimo kiss. He was rewarded with a sweet lick on the end of his nose.

"I'm sorry I scared you the other day," he said to the cat. "And I'm sorry I called you little." At this, Chairman Meow gave a little huff, but turned back to him with a friendly expression. "Can we be friends, now?"

The cat gave a friendly meow and licked him again. Alec nuzzled him to his chest. After a moment, he realized he'd completely forgotten that Magnus was in the room. He looked up to find a very open expression on his face. His green-yellow eyes were a little watery, and he turned away before Alec could comment. He went back to grilling their sandwiches without a word, but Alec swore he heard a sniffle. But, then again, he probably just imagined it.

It seemed that once Chairman Meow becomes friendly with someone, he tends to latch on and never let go. The cat didn't leave Alec's side for the rest of the day. They watched several DVDs of Magnus' guilty pleasure (Alec was actually beginning to like it, but that probably had something to do with the company he was in while he watched it). When they had eaten their sandwiches and grown tired of Joey and Pacey and Jenn, they switched back to cable.

Magnus was flipping through the channels so fast that Alec was sure he didn't really register what was on each one. He finally slowed down when he got to MTV and VH1.

"Oh! I love these things!" Magnus exclaimed, parking the channel and putting down the remote. "It's like stepping back into my childhood."

It was one of those "I Love the 90s" shows, where they talked about the weird music and made fun of the trends. Alec had to admit, he tended to like these shows, although they were sadly devoid of his favorite thing of the 90s, which was grunge music. They really only focused on the more pop sounding music. But he liked it when they talked shit about the fanny packs and matching windsuits and stuff.

At the moment, they were on the music portion of the show. They were playing random clips of songs that made 1990's Billboard Hot 100. Alec started chuckling when they put on Ice, Ice, Baby. Jace knew every single word to that song; it was scary sometimes.

But all of a sudden, he and Chairman Meow were startled out of their lazy state by Magnus jumping up off the couch and quite literally jumping around in delight. Alec had been laying back against his chest, with Chairman Meow in his lap, but now they were sitting there shocked at what the master of the house was doing.

"Oh my GAWD I love this song!" he cried.

"I can tell," Alec smirked. The cat was still a little shaken, but apparently he was used to Magnus doing random weird things when he got excited.

"I used to dance around to this all the time in my room at home! I watched the video so much I learned all Janet's moves," he said with a proud smile.

"You're lying," Alec said, disbelieving.

"Try me," Magnus said. He waited for the chorus to hit, and he started dancing. He was facing Alec, the TV behind him. Alec watched, looking back and forth from Magnus to the TV, and he was cracking up before too long. He knew every single step, and he was singing at the top of his lungs. Alec was still entranced by the sound of his voice, since he'd so recently let it out (and he still rarely did it, really), but he was also laughing at the ridiculousness of a grown man doing perfect 90s video dance moves around the living room, his hair flying around with his head movements just like Janet.

"Come on baby, let's get away! Let's save our troubles for another day! Come go with me, we've got it made! Lemme take ya on an escapade!" When the video dance sequence was over, he settled for prancing around the room singing. Alec couldn't stop his laughter. Magnus' mood and the beat of the song were so infectious that he kind of wanted to get up and dance around with him.

As if Magnus had read his mind, he hopped over to the couch and tugged Alec up by the arm, twirling him around and pulling him close. Then he let go and started dancing circles around Alec, who stood there a little awkwardly but still with a huge (slightly bashful) smile on his face. This was the most fun he'd had in years.

When the video ended, he could tell Magnus was a little disappointed. The next video that came on was New Kids on the Block, and they both looked at each other before cracking up. They were back on the couch, panting from exertion and still smiling. Magnus leaned over and placed a sweet kiss on Alec's waiting lips.

Just the feeling caused a shiver of something to crawl up from Alec's toes. He put his hand on the back of Magnus' neck, pinning him there. The other man didn't seem to object. In fact, he slowly shoved Alec down onto the couch, maneuvering on top of him. Their kisses got more heated with every swipe of Alec's tongue against Magnus' lips. They forgot the world and all the bullshit in it that was against them, and just melted into each other.

Alec knew it was all too good to be true, and that the fact that he was keeping his relationship a secret was bound to bite him in the ass sooner or later. He also knew that he was going back to LA in two days, and he wouldn't be seeing Magnus for a long time. But he tried not to let the crushing weight of those realizations ruin his last bit of time on cloud nine.

They made out for hours, only stopping for air when it was absolutely necessary, and just drinking each other in. Alec was aware that his feelings for Magnus were a different breed than he'd ever felt for anyone before, but he wasn't yet sure what to call them. He pushed the thought aside and just lived the moment, soaking it in because he knew his time was about to run out.


	18. Chapter 18

What was he so sad about? It's not like it's hard to fly from New York to LA once in a while. It was simple, and completely affordable for Magnus. So why, then, was Alec so fucking depressed that he was leaving tonight? He felt like he was leaving his soul behind. He hadn't even fully packed yet, and already he was feeling the crushing weight of loss on his heart.

He was sitting in his room at his parents' house, looking around in dismay. Packing had never been hard before. He was a very orderly, ordinary kind of person, and he usually packed light. But that wasn't the problem. Packing made it seem final, like it was actually here. His bag lay open on the floor, the last of his clothes strewn about around it.

Honestly, he was a little surprised at himself. Before he'd come to New York this time, he'd been dreading it. He didn't like spending time with his parents, really (which proved an unnecessary worry, since he never saw them anyway). He didn't really like hanging around with Jace, simply because of his complex feelings (although, once he was around Jace, it was usually hard not to want to be near him. However, that had changed a lot in the past couple of weeks). He usually couldn't wait till these trips were over and he could go back to the monotony of practice and jogging along the coast on Friday mornings. This time, however, he was extremely reluctant to leave the hell on earth that was New York. He would miss his sister and Jace, that was true, but he knew that wasn't the real reason.

He'd given himself headache after headache the past few days, trying to decipher his feelings for Magnus, whatever they might be. He refused to say it was love, because in his mind, that seemed like the kiss of death to his sanity. How could he have gone from being completely alone and pining over his adopted brother to "in love" with someone so open about himself, and who appeared to be pretty infatuated with him, also? It just didn't seem cosmically possible, so he figured it wasn't. All things like that were too good to be true. Plus, no one falls in love after knowing someone a matter of weeks. That's convoluted Twilight bullshit. That never happens in real life.

Although, he was starting to believe in adoration that bordered on addiction. He felt the nagging need in his bones when he was away from Magnus. It told him that there was _something_ there, he just couldn't define it. He didn't even know what Magnus felt. Where they a couple? Surely not. It was too soon for that, wasn't it? Well then, what were they? They couldn't be- (blush)- _fuck buddies_- could they? They'd only slept together once, and it was definitely not classified as _fucking_ in Alec's mind.

That was another thing. If he was going to refer to it in his mind as "making love", then that would indicate there was something bordering on love brewing between them. That brought the headache back again. He rubbed his temples with his index fingers for a few moments, and tried to put it out of his mind for the moment, so he could continue packing. He'd save the Magnus thoughts for later.

* * *

He had known this day would come. After all, how long could one take a leave of absence from a basically year-round sport? Apparently, the cap on that was about two and a half weeks. It hurt to think that he might just be a fling to Alec, who had had no intention of staying here from the start. It wasn't his fault, he had obligations on the West coast. But Magnus couldn't help the nagging feeling that there was something more than playful, high school crushing going on between them. He'd begun to feel more and more attached to Alec the more time he spent with him. He was like what Magnus imagined a nicotine addiction to be like. The more you got, the more you wanted. It just made it better each time.

He lay across his unmade bed, Chairman Meow resting on his chest. He immaturely resented the small feline, because he was in Alec's designated spot. He wished with all his heart and soul that Alec was here, holding him and kissing him. His warm, muscular body pressed against him, pulling him closer.

He shook his head to rid himself of the thought. Alec's plane was leaving today, and he had no indication that he was going to get to see him before he left. Alec hadn't said as much, anyway. He expected at least a phone call, or a text, saying that he'd made it home safely. That's all he could hope for. After all, there was no real obligation, considering they weren't an actual item or anything (although Magnus like to think about it sometimes). He still considered it a onetime thing, a fortuitous occurrence that wouldn't happen again. He didn't like to think of Alec as a fling, since in Magnus' mind he was so much more than that. On the other hand, he figured that's what Alec defined their little tryst as. What else could it be?

That question brought loads of answers to his mind, one of which he wished for more than anything. That maybe Alec had started developing feelings that resembled Magnus'. He didn't want to call it love, but he knew, in the back of his mind, that's what it was. It seemed ridiculously far-fetched. Magnus, even being his flamboyant, spontaneous self, still retained a fair bit of groundedness. He knew falling in love after knowing someone for such a short time was something that was saved for Lifetime movies. Why, then, was he so riveted on his cell phone, wondering when Alec would call, and worried immensely about him while he was in transit?

* * *

Alec had finally finished packing, and had his mind completely set. He was infinitely thankful that he hadn't mentioned when his flight was leaving. He bounded down the stairs, looking like he was in a hurry (which he was, just not for the reason that he was making it seem like).

"What's the matter?" Isabelle asked from her perch on the couch.

"I'm going to be late! My flight leaves in an hour and I still have to get there and make it through security!" He fluttered about, grabbing last minute things like his jacket and keys. He slung his duffel over his shoulder and rushed over to the couch, giving his sister and quick hug and kiss goodbye. He'd feel bad for rushing out, but she was supposed to be in LA the following week and he would see her soon anyway. "Tell Jace I'll see him next month when he's out there!"

"Okay," she said. She blew him a goodbye kiss, making him blush, and went back to watching Real Housewives of New York City (ironic, yes I know).

Alec flew into the elevator, punching the button for the first floor. When the doors finally opened, he ran outside and hailed a cab, thankful Hodge wasn't hanging around to offer him a lift. He'd have a hard time explaining his actual destination at the moment, seeing as La Guardia was in completely the other direction.

He hopped into the cab, duffel and all. "Brooklyn," he said, and the driver took off.

* * *

Magnus had finally gotten off his ass and gone into the living room. He was still overpowered by his thoughts of Alec, probably sailing further and further away from him at this very moment. He felt it like a spear through his heart. This was getting ridiculous. He had never felt this way after a couple of weeks with anyone before. He cursed himself that he had to go and fall for a closeted star athlete who was only in town for a short period anyway.

Chairman Meow definitely wasn't helping either. He would alternate between giving Magnus pitiful looks and trotting over to the elevator and waiting, only to have it never open up and reveal the feet he wanted to see. It was making Magnus more depressed to know that even his cat was eager for Alec to come back to them.

All of a sudden, the cat hopped up again. He ran over towards the elevator, skidding the last couple of feet in his haste. He pawed at the door, meowing excitedly.

"Settle down, Meow. There's no one there," Magnus said, not even bothering to look up. But he didn't have cat hearing like Meow did. The cat just kept sitting, pawing at the door occasionally, impatient. He looked back at Magnus and cried loud, and Magnus finally lifted his head.

"What? What do you want? I can't make him magically appear in the elevator!" he exclaimed in exasperation. The cat continued to meow annoyingly loud for such a tiny little thing. He sure could be insistent when he wanted to be. Magnus dragged himself off the couch, padding over to the elevator door.

"For the last time, I'm not a magician! I wish I could teleport him here, but I can't! I'll prove it to you. Watch." He pulled back his sleeves, looking like he was getting ready to do a little manual labor. He cracked his knuckles and held his arms out in front of him, towards the door of the elevator. Holding them out, he snapped his fingers and waited half a second. "See? Nothing hap-"

Ding.

The elevator door opened and there was a mirage in front of him. Or a hologram. Or a projection. Or something. Alexander Lightwood was standing in the elevator, looking at him. It took Alec a split second before he walked forward, dropped his bag (nearly crushing Chairman Meow), and walked between Magnus' outstretched arms. He planted a very hungry kiss on Magnus' lips, to which Magnus responded automatically, without much help from his brain except that it was telling him this wasn't true.

"I only have a few hours," Alec said breathily when he finally pried his lips away from Magnus'.

"What?" Magnus said, still in a daze, wondering if this was real or if he'd actually gone crazy with the longing.

"I told Isabelle my flight leaves in about 45 minutes," he said, arms snaking around Magnus' neck and twining in his hair, causing Magnus to sigh and work hard to keep his mind working.

"When does it leave?" he asked.

"At 9:30," Alec said against his neck, where he'd begun to pepper kisses over the now heated skin. Magnus thought for a moment. That gave them- 4 hours. Oh, the things they could do in 4 hours. So why were they still standing here in the doorway of the elevator?

Magnus captured Alec's lips again and pulled him toward the living room by his shirt collar. He noted with interest that Alec had dressed in a familiar blue, gray, and white flannel. The shirt of Magnus' he left with the first night he'd come over. For some reason, it really awakened something inside Magnus, and suddenly nothing was enough. Not the contact of just Alec's lips, not the amount of time they had left, not the fact that bedroom was still 20 feet away. He wanted ALL of Alec NOW. He had to have him. It was simple involuntary bodily need.

He worked the buttons open all the way down in record time, dropping the shirt to the floor. He didn't have time to blink before his own was yanked over his head. Hands were tangled together and buttons and zippers were pulled and ripped at, desperately trying to get more contact, skin on burning skin. It became apparent to Magnus that they were not going to make it to the bedroom this time. They made it about halfway from the elevator to the bedroom, which passed an apparently inviting piece of furniture. Magnus was just glad the lid of the grand piano happened to be closed.

He felt the prick of cold on his bare ass as his skin made contact with the smooth white lacquer on top of the piano. He scooted up and lay down on his back, assuming Alec would join him. But Alec stayed standing; Magnus lifted his head to look at him.

"No, just lay back," he said. Magnus was so dazed with lust and something else, he didn't even think to argue.

He let out a gasp of pleasure as Alec's lips descended over his rock hard member. Hands were at the insides of his thighs, massaging and caressing, making his head hazy. It felt like he'd slipped his dick into heaven.

"Oh shit Alec. Oh- God- Oh _God_," he moaned. And then Alec did it back. He actually moaned, low and deep, with his lips around Magnus. The vibration made Magnus cry out even louder.

He could tell Alec didn't _really_ know what he was doing, but he was learning as he went; and, after all, he had the same equipment. It wasn't that hard to figure out what felt good.

After a few more vibrating moans and a few light scrapes with his teeth, Alec came up and looked at Magnus with devastatingly blue eyes. Magnus couldn't explain the look on his face, but he was pretty sure he was carrying the same look.

"What is it, baby?" Magnus crooned, still a little breathless and wishing Alec would put his able lips back on him.

"You make me feel amazing, Magnus," he said, those eyes honing in on Magnus' soul. "I want to make you feel that amazing."

And with that, he stuck two fingers in his mouth, still looking straight at his lover, his other hand still wrapped around Magnus' straining erection, getting precum leaked out onto his knuckles. Magnus watched in anticipation and Alec ran his tongue between his own fingers a couple more times, then removed them. He bent down and placed his closed lips against the head, and then lowered back down onto Magnus' cock with devastating slowness. He hollowed out his cheeks a few times, tightening his mouth's grip. Magnus was just about to beg for _more, please_! when Alec's hand snuck up and he felt one long, wet finger push inside.

"O-oh my God, Alec," he gasped. His fingers flew into Alec's hair, tugging gently and bucking his hips up. Alec rolled his finger in a circle, coaxing the muscles into compliance. Then Magnus felt the second finger join the first. "Ah- ungh- oh please _God_ don't stop," he whined in between whimpers. Alec didn't say anything, just kept moving his mouth up and down and his fingers in and out and around in circles, stretching the taut muscles.

Once, when Alec went all the way down and hit the back of his throat, he shoved his fingers further inside, brushing up against Magnus' prostate slightly. He bucked his hips involuntarily again.

"Ahhhh!" he screamed, and he felt Alec smile around him. "Do it again, please baby, please!" he cried. He _needed_ that sensation again.

Alec complied, pushing in deep and brushing that oh-so-wonderful spot inside him. By now, Magnus was quite literally whining and whimpering like a virgin about to have his first orgasm. That's what it felt like, anyway. "Jesus, I'm so close- so fucking close Alec," he moaned, fingers tugging at Alec's hair still.

He almost cried when Alec lifted his mouth off of him for a split second.

"Look at me, Magnus," he said lustily. "I want to see your face." Magnus held his head up and he moaned loud as Alec locked his eyes and held his gaze as he lowered back down onto him, shoving his fingers in even further than before. Magnus let his eyes roll back in his head, but kept his head up where Alec could see his face. Knowing Alec was watching made it even better.

Then, Alec let him have it. He shoved his mouth down all the way, angling differently and then taking all of Magnus' painfully hard member into the back of his throat. He also pushed his fingers in as far as they would go, and rubbed the pads of his fingers in circles on Magnus' sweet spot deep inside. Magnus' hands weren't even pulling his hair anymore, because the shaking that had started in his hands made him lose all his strength and voluntary movement. His eyes were permanently in the back of his head, it seemed. He didn't even register his screams of pleasure. His release hit him hard and he bucked up one last time into Alec's waiting mouth. Later, he would be a little shocked that Alec took it all down his throat and didn't let him go all over his own stomach, but at the moment he was too preoccupied by the pleasure haze in his brain.

When he was finished, Alec pulled his fingers out and climbed up on top of the piano, hovering over Magnus' still quivering form. Without a word, Magnus licked his palm up and down, and reached down to grasp Alec's straining cock, standing at attention. Alec moaned and bit down hard on his lower lip. Magnus slathered his saliva all over Alec, his muscles still feeling the stretch from Alec's fingers.

It was like fireworks exploded behind his eyes a moment later, when Alec entered him in one quick, firm thrust. They both gasped into each other's mouths, and then most intelligible words were muffled between their dueling tongues. Magnus wrapped both his legs around Alec's waist as the younger boy began a series of very pointed thrusts, tapping that spot inside him again, making it even more unbelievable than it was a minute ago.

Suddenly, again Magnus was overcome with that feeling that it wasn't enough. He wanted more, always more. "Harder, Alec," he pleaded.

"Whatever you want, baby," Alec answered in a breathy huff. He reached down and hooked his hand behind Magnus' left knee, pulling it up and throwing it over his shoulder. This opened Magnus up quite a bit more, allowing Alec to go even deeper. Magnus kept wondering when it was going to stop getting better.

"Magnus, oh- God Magnus- " Alec moaned in between sloppy, deep kisses. Their lips vibrated with their shared moans. Magnus was sliding back and forth on the smooth lacquer, his back slick with sweat. His hands were clutching at any part of Alec he could get to: his hips, his hair, his biceps, his ass. He finally settled on cupping his backside and pulling him in harder and harder with each thrust. Alec's head fell down into the crook of Magnus' neck and he proceeded to nip at the exposed skin there.

Magnus could tell Alec wasn't going to last much longer because he started to fall out of rhythm. His steady, deep thrusts became short bursts and long, drawn out withdrawals. When he was almost there, he lifted his head and looked at Magnus again. It was clear, it was any second now. But there was something else in his eyes, something that took Magnus aback slightly.

"Magnus," he began. "Magnus I- I- "

And he knew. He reached up to run his thumb over Alec's cheek in a gesture of pure adoration. "Me too, Alec. It's okay, me too," he said with all the conviction he could muster. And then Alec's lips captured his in their most passionate kiss yet, and he felt the euphoria of Alec shooting off inside him with alarming force. He tasted a slight tinge of salt, not knowing if the tears were his own, Alec's, or both. He didn't care.

As Alec came down from his high, and their breath started to return to normal, Alec rested his head on Magnus' chest. They lay there in companionable silence for a time, which neither was very sure how long it was. Chairman Meow, long forgotten, was hiding under the couch from all the commotion.

Sooner or later, common sense won them over and they decided to get up and off the top of the piano. With shaky legs, they walked around picking up their various clothes from the path from the piano to the elevator, where Alec's bag was still sitting next to the door. Alec pulled his cell phone from his jeans pocket and checked the time.

"Shit," he said.

"What is it?" Magnus asked, hoping Alec had missed his flight and would have to stay the night and catch one in the morning.

"I only have an hour and a half till boarding," he said with a sullen expression. "I don't want to leave you," he said, putting his arms around Magnus' neck and pulling him down for a long, sweet kiss.

"Then don't go. Just stay here, no one will ever know," Magnus suggested against his lips.

"I have to. I have practice tomorrow morning," Alec said. Magnus' face fell, and Alec kissed his nose. "I'm sorry. But- you'll- you'll come see me? I mean, if you have the time?" He sounded so hopeful.

"I want to. But I have so much to attend to here. I've got to keep watch over Cherry Bomb, and all the business and things. I wish I could just pack up and go with you for good," Magnus said.

"Me too," Alec said, putting his forehead against Magnus' while Magnus let his arm snake around Alec's waist, trying desperately to hold him there. But he knew he had to let go. He told himself it wasn't forever, even though it felt like it. It felt like his heart was ripping away and Alec was taking it with him.

With one last kiss, Alec grabbed his bag and slung it over his shoulder. The look he gave Magnus as the elevator door closed haunted Magnus for the rest of the night and most of the next day.

As they waited on the tarmac, Alec's head rested against the window while he thought about what he was leaving behind in New York this time. It was making him want to scream. He wished he'd have negotiated more time off, but he knew he needed to get back to his team. He just wasn't sure he was going to be able to focus on playing when his mind and his heart were definitely staying behind in Brooklyn.


	19. Chapter 19

Alec lay his head against the window most of the way across the country. He found he didn't have the desire to lift it; his whole body just ached. The pleasant muscle soreness of the exertion of sex was gone, and in its place was a constant tension. He felt like his heart was caught in a midair tug of war between New York and LA. It was exhausting, and he tried to put it to a stop. He had practice starting tomorrow morning, and he needed to focus. But it just wouldn't happen; his body and his heart were on a completely different wavelength than his mind.

"Attention passengers: You are now permitted to use any cell phones or other electronic devices. Please use caution when retrieving your bags from the overhead bins, as some bags may have shifted during flight. Everyone have a safe stay, and welcome to Los Angeles."

They taxied into LAX and he sluggishly got up and retrieved his duffel from the overhead bin. He let a few passengers from behind him pass before sliding out into the isle and making his way toward the door.

"Welcome to Los Angeles! Enjoy your stay!" The flight attendant was saying to each passenger as they departed. "Welcome to Los Angeles! Enjoy your- Oh!" she paused when she recognized Alec. He didn't even register her flirtatious lash-batting in his direction. "Welcome home Mr. Lightwood. Good luck next week!"

He tried to smile his warmest smile, but suspected it looked more like he was a little constipated, considering the look on her face. He felt a little guilty, but that didn't stop him from just trudging on, looking at his feet.

He walked through the terminal, not really seeing anyone. He was thankful it was pretty late at night on a Sunday, and most people had flown in earlier in the day. It was relatively deserted for such a busy airport.

He was almost out the door when he heard his name being called. "Lightwood! Hey, Lightwood! Wait up, man!"

He turned around slowly, not really wanting to talk to anyone very much. He softened a little when he saw who it was jogging through the few others milling about. He would know that voice anywhere.

"Hey, Don. How's it going?" he asked when the tall goalkeeper had made it to him.

"Man, what's the matter?" Donovan asked with a concerned look. His smooth, quiet voice with its fading Jamaican accent conveyed the concern of a friend.

"Why do you ask?"

"Because you look like someone just punched you in the stomach," he said. He put a hand on Alec's shoulder. "Did something happen at home?" Somehow, despite being one of the best goalies in the entire U.S. league, Donovan Ricketts managed to remain one of the most genuine people Alec had ever met. And he'd hit the nail on the head, but Alec wasn't about to tell him that.

"Nah, man. I guess I'm just- tired. Jet-lagged, you know?" It was a lame excuse, and he could tell Donovan saw right through it; but, being the perceptive person he was, he didn't press the issue.

"Yeah, me too. But it was worth it to see my mother's face again. I surprised her with tickets for next week. We better kill them, she said. If we are losing by two, she said she will get up and hop a plane back to Jamaica before the game is even over!" He chuckled, clapping Alec on the back.

Alec laughed a little. "Yeah, it was good to see my family, too. In the flesh, I mean," he amended.

Donovan laughed. "I know what you mean. Is it still awkward to see that sign of Isabelle outside your window every day?"

"A little," Alec chuckled. They stood in comfortable silence for a few more seconds, until Donovan let his hand drop.

"Well, I'll let you get home. See you bright and early!" he said with mock enthusiasm. Alec smiled and waved.

"See ya," he called after him.

Alec made his way outside to hail a cab back to his apartment. As he slid in, he felt the very slight ease from Donovan's carefree presence slip away, only to be replaced by the previous feeling of constant tension on his heart. He was going to have to shake this before tomorrow, or everyone would suffer. This was getting ridiculous.

* * *

**Song for this section: The Hell Song by Sum 41 (AWESOME song. Loved this song for a long time, especially the guitar solo. And, as an added bonus, the lyrics make sense for Alec. Plus, the tempo kind of fitsâ€¦lol)**

He cursed as he nicked the post again, watching in frustration as the ball ricocheted off to the side for the fourth time that day. He definitely wasn't focused today, and everyone was starting to notice. He'd barely given Donovan anything to do.

"What the fuck is up, Buzz?" Landon asked, trotting up to him.

"I don't know. I guess it's just hard getting back from so long off, ya know?" Alec offered weakly. He tried to play it off as the truth, though. Landon didn't seem to pick up on it.

"Well how about growing a pair and making it _in_ the damn goal when you kick it that direction, yeah?" Ugh. Somehow, when Magnus had a fading British accent, it wasn't quite as annoying as David Beckham's. And just like that, whatever was left of his concentration flitted out the window with the thought of Magnus.

"Oh, piss off man," Landon said. "We're a team here, right? We've all just had a long break, and it's hard to get back in the groove. But we have to work together, okay? You guys know Dallas is going to totally kick our asses if we can't focus."

"Well, the problem's right here," Michael said, pointing at Alec. "His head is somewhere up his ass. Definitely nowhere near the field."

"Shut up, okay? I got it," Alec said, sounding whiney to his own ears. He knew he was pulling them down. He couldn't even score a goal in scrimmage. How the hell was he going to go up against the Burn?

"Quit arguing like a bunch of goddamn girls on the rag! Get your shit together and play some goddamn soccer!" Coach Arena was yelling from the sideline at them. They were looking rather like a bunch of whiney, arguing pussies.

"Alright. It's been a long day. Another couple of good plays and we'll get out of here, okay guys?" Landon said in his pep-talky captain voice. The rest of them grumbled and went back to their positions.

They started playing again, and soon enough, Alec had the ball once more. He dribbled to the end of the field, damn near staring Donovan in the eye. He juggled around until he was free, faked to the left, and sent a powerful blast through his foot to the ball, which powered past Donovan's outstretched left hand. For a second, Alec was already cussing in his head because it was looking like the ball was going to nick off the post and out again. It did hit the post at an awkward angle, but it decided to go the right direction this time, rolling into the corner of the net.

"Yes," he whispered to himself, getting that goal-high for the first time all day. It was his claim to fame; He and Landon were the best scorers on the team. Once he had his groove back, he started to feel more at ease. Maybe this whole Magnus thing would go away, after all.

And just like that, it was back again. The single thought of just his name called up all kinds of images of shiny purple, dark corners, a comfy bed, a sleek white grand, and a beautiful, haunting voice singing him to sleep.

"Finally! Buzz is back!" David yelled from halfway across the field. Alec rolled his eyes at the nickname. At 23, he was the youngest on the team, so they had made jokes about him bringing his toys to practice one day, when he first started (at 21). And back then, the coach had actually accidentally called him Lightyear. So, the name stuck with a vengeance.

After a short talk from Coach Arena, the team headed back to the field house into the locker room. Alec's thoughts were a blur of Magnus' pretty face and soft lips. He kept trying to talk himself out of it, to tell himself that none of it had actually happened, and he was still hung up on Jace, but it didn't seem to work. He internally bitched at himself for being so weak when it came to the sparkly club owner.

As he lathered up, he closed his eyes and tried to figure out how he was going to keep thoughts of Magnus from sneaking in during the game next week. The thought of having a Bane attack during one of the most important games of the season, on live television no less, was more than a little unsettling. He fought to hold on to his bearings, telling himself if he fucked this one up, he might be benched for the rest of the year. That was almost too much to think about, considering he was hitting his prime this season.

As the warm water soothed his aching back, he let thoughts creep in of long, caramel fingers kneading his shoulders and releasing the tension coiled up in his body. He thought of those fingers playing at the nape of his neck, scratching his scalp lightly, and tugging his hair. The thought of the hair tugging brought to mind the previous night, when Magnus had been so overcome that he'd nearly pulled half Alec's hair out while he was pleasuring him. But Alec hadn't minded in the least.

And then, he noticed he'd better stop thinking about such things before he had a situation on his hands. He shut off the water and wrapped a towel around his waist. He walked, hair dripping, back to the almost empty locker room and opened up his bag, pulling out a clean gray t-shirt and black sweat pants. He dressed in a daze, still thinking (involuntarily) about Magnus' tongue working inside his mouth, his lips so soft against his own.

He had his pants on, hanging low on his hips, and was pulling his shirt down when he heard someone else walk through the room.

"Al- Lightwood? Why are you still here?" It was Donovan.

"What?" Alec said brilliantly.

"Why are you still here?" he repeated. "You're usually gone before I even make it in here." The look on his face was puzzled, but not entirely unknowing. Again, it was that friendly, brotherly concern he possessed.

"Wait- huh?" And then Alec's mind returned to him. He was pulling his shirt over his chest. His hair was dripping wet. He smelled clean. His muscles were somewhat relaxed. His bag was open on the bench in front of him, his practice jersey thrown haphazardly into it.

Oh. My. God.

This was serious.

His mind had wandered so much that he'd actually taken a shower _with his teammates_. Dear. God.

"Lightwood, are you sure you're okay?"

"Uh, um, yeah, sure. Sorry, gotta go!" he said, hastily throwing his things into his bag and stepping into his tennis shoes. He grabbed his keys and gave Donovan an apologetic look as he ran out the door and into the team parking lot.

He hurried to his car, only letting himself breathe once he'd tossed his duffel onto the passenger seat and slid in to the buttery black leather driver's seat. He let out a long sigh, caressing the wheel.

"What the hell just happened?" he asked the car. "I think I'm losing my mind," he mumbled. He turned the key in the ignition and the engine purred to life beneath him. He reveled in the familiarity of being strapped behind the wheel of his baby, his best friend. "What do you say we get a drink on the way home?"

The car seemed to idle a little louder for a second, before returning to normal. He took that to mean that it was a good idea. He put it in first, let off the clutch, and punched it, rolling down the window and letting the whipping wind on his face clear his head, enjoying the ride.


	20. Chapter 20

"You seriously need to pop a Midol, baby. You're raining on my Macy's parade," Camille said absently as she snatched a sequined blouse off the rack, putting it up to herself and examining her reflection in the mirrored column to their left.

"I don't know why we came here anyway. You never find anything you like. And _me_, well. I'm convinced there is nothing within a 20 mile radius of this store that speaks my language," Magnus said with a haughty, annoyed air.

"I think you're right about that. But I blame you for us coming here in the first place," she said.

"How the fuck do you figure?"

"Because I headed in and you didn't stop me and inform me of the utter fashion failure that is Macy's of this century."

Magnus rolled his eyes and turned on his heel, not even thinking that she might not follow him. He knew she would. When they were back out on the sidewalk he said, "Can we _please_ have some relaxation time? My mind is just not in the mood for fashion today."

"Whatever will bring back my friend and get rid of this sulky emo imposter," she said, putting her arm through his; they started making their way down the block.

He supposed she was right. He wasn't his normal sparkly, effervescent self today that was for sure. He hadn't slept much the night before, courtesy of his longing for Alec. The night was spent with his warring body and heart, which both missed Alec in completely different ways. His heart felt hollow, like he'd lost a dear friend. But it was more than that; they'd almost said it aloud last night. They'd almost said the words that he'd been arguing with himself about for the past week. Hell, they basically did say it. He knew what Alec had meant to say; it was obvious. But could they really mean it after so little time together? Did Alec regret saying it (sort of)? He hadn't heard from him since last night when he texted to say his flight was in. Were they a couple? Magnus thought surely they were; they acted like it.

"So. Thinking about Sporty Spice?" Camille asked as they neared the nail salon on 4th.

Magnus gave her a look.

"Thought so. It's written all over your face. I thought he made you happy?" she asked.

"He did. He does. When he's _here_," he whined.

"Oh my God, Magnus. He was here for, like, a day. Are you honestly this hung up on him? You haven't been this way since D-"

"Don't you dare say his name. Cheating bastard. And yes, I am this hung up. I think he is, too. I've never fallen this hard this fast. "

"You've _fallen_? My, this _is_ serious," she said sarcastically. "However, in the event that retail therapy doesn't do the trick- " She opened the door to the chic salon for him with a flourish and a flick of her hair. He hoped she was right.

As they sat next to each other while the chatty girls buffed and filed their already perfect nails, Magnus thought about the implications if they _were_, in fact, a couple. How would that work? It's not like they could ever see each other. They both had pressing obligations on separate ends of the continent. Did that mean their little tryst was over for good? Hopefully not. Magnus didn't think he could really make himself believe that he would never have Alec in his bed again. It was too unbearable.

When the time came for the girl to polish his perfect manicure, Camille gave him an accusing look when he picked black.

"What? It matches my mood," he said crankily.

"The _point_ of this outing was to change your mood. Quit being such a queen and work with me here," She chided him.

"Fine. You be the queen and tell me what color would suit the mood you want me to have."

She got up and strolled over to the rack of polishes. She took about a minute before she let out a girly-pitched "Ah!" and headed back over to him. She set the bottle down and resumed her seat. He looked at her with a sullen expression, but she refused to acknowledge it. He sighed and nodded to the manicurist.

Twenty minutes later, he was admiring his electric blue nails in the waning rays of the sun mixed with the emerging neon of the Manhattan night. He let himself smile. When he turned his hand a certain way, they exactly resembled Alec's eyes. The thought probably should have made him a little more sad, but he liked that he could carry Alec with him in a way that was distinctly his. It also brought to mind the fact that Alec still had his shirt, and that maybe he was wearing it right now. Or at least snuggling with it at night. Hey, he could hope couldn't he?

"Feeling better?"

"Yeah, I guess. Thanks," he said.

"That's what I'm here for. And it was entirely for my benefit, by the way. I couldn't have you all sullen and cranky for the rest of the night. Plus, your nails were starting to look like shit anyway. It's been, like, three weeks since you let someone clean them up!" She was appalled.

"Well, I had other things on my mind," he said with a smirk.

"And on your dick," she returned. He smiled wider. "Now. Can we please have some sushi therapy? I'm dying for some shrimp."

"I agree," he said, and hailed a cab.

When they sat down at the restaurant, Camille rolled her eyes as Magnus ordered a California roll just for the hell of it.

* * *

**Song for this section: D is for Dangerous by Allison Iraheta (I love this song! And her voice! And it TOTALLY fits Jaryâ€¦)**

"It sounds like shit, doesn't it?" he asked as he put his acoustic down.

"No, it doesn't. I liked it," she said absently.

"Were you even listening?" he asked, looking annoyed. She finally looked at him with a guilty expression on her face. He rolled his eyes. "Clary, the show is in two days, and I want it to be worth listening to. In order to make sure it is, I need some feedback from a competent, semi-fan. Naturally, I turned to you. You agreed to help. How about holding up your end of the bargain?"

"I'm sorry. I'm just not all here. Play it again, I'll listen real good this time, I promise," she said in a mock schoolgirl voice.

"You're right. Your mind's in Manhattan," Simon retorted. "And I don't feel like playing it again. I've played it three times already."

"Look, you know you guys will be great. You've already got the record companies after you. What's to worry about?"

"Company. Singular," he said. "And it's not like they're clambering to sign us either. They want us to write a bunch of new songs cause they hate our old ones. But we like our old ones. Eric says they can suck it. I kind of agree. Hence, the need to attract more attention for the songs we already play well. Get it?"

"Seriously, you need to lighten up. What do you say we go back to that cool club again? Cherry something or other."

"The purple one?" he asked with a grimace.

"Yeah! Didn't you like it?" she asked enthusiastically, seriously not understanding why he didn't think it was the bomb.

"Ohhh yes," he said sarcastically. "I thoroughly enjoyed sitting in the dark corner right next to you, watching you fawn over blonde-Stallone-wannabe."

"I seem to recall you paying very little attention to _us_. Or were you just pretending to oogle the Supermodel boobs that were dangling right in front of your face?" He blushed a little and looked down. "That's what I thought," she said bitingly. "She's got, like, four inches on you, you know that right?"

"I don't care. Models are supposed to be tall. It's part of the appeal," he said.

"Yes, but that usually means they date tall guys. Like, uh, male models? Not normal height, scruffy musicians." she said.

"How would they? Most male models are gay anyway," he returned.

"They are not! At least I hope not."

"Oh Jesus. You're not still hung on Gabriel, are you? God, he looks like such a pussy."

"You're just jealous you can't pull off nautical skinny jeans and a four hundred dollar white t-shirt," she said with a smile.

"Oh, sweetheart, I am definitely not jealous of _that_."

They sat in companionable silence for a few more moments before Clary's phone rang out with the theme from Terminal Payback, the most famous of Jace Lightwood's movies. Simon did a glorious eye roll as Clary answered it.

"Hello?" she said tentatively, trying to keep the giddiness out of her voice.

"Hey, beautiful," he said. She couldn't help smiling, and that seemed to annoy Simon even more.

"What's up?" she said.

"Well, I was wondering if you wanted to hang tonight. Cherry Bomb?" he asked, infinite confidence with a tinge of hopefulness.

"Oh! Simon and I were just saying how we wanted to catch a drink there later." At this, Simon started doing the neck slicing motion with fervor.

Jace paused for a second and she thought he might object, but he went on animatedly. "Great! It's settled, then. And don't worry, I'll bring your boy some eye candy to keep him occupied."

She laughed nervously. "Alright, sounds good. You gonna meet us there?"

"Nah, we'll come get you guys. I have a feeling we'll be needing a DD tonight, and I'm sure Hodge won't mind," he said.

"Cool. See you around- ten?" she asked.

"Sure thing, babe." He hung up.

"This _is_ the universal sign for 'FUCK NO'. You do know that right?" Simon asked, demonstrating the gesture once more.

"Oh, come on. He said he'd bring Isabelle for you," she said cheerily.

"Yes, I heard that. He calls you babe, too. You sure you aren't dating?"

She blushed. "I'm pretty sure dating constitutes regular _dates_," she said a little glumly. It did seem that Jace just called her up when he wanted to go out and party. Was that all she was to him? Arm candy? But why her, when he could get someone much prettier, and a lot more famous to accompany him on his socialite outings? No, he had to be interested, _really_ interested, in her. At least she hoped so, because she was really interested in him. She was a little addicted to his big arms and strong jaw. Not to mention he was an _incredible_ kisser. She sighed at herself.

"Well, just as long as he doesn't break your heart. He's a player, Clary. Just be careful, "Simon said with his brotherly voice. She loved when it was that easy between them.

"I can take care of myself, Dad," she teased.

* * *

"Change of plans," Jace said as he ended the call. "You're coming with us."

"What?" Isabelle asked, incredulous. "Oh, hell no. I totally planned on spending tonight in the Jacuzzi with the latest Sookie book, and that's what I'm gonna do."

"Please, Iz? She's bringing Cobain." Jace put on his best brotherly pleading look.

"Fuck off, Jace. That doesn't work on me."

"Fine. I'll just mail your vibrator to Mom tomorrow morning. I'm sure she'll love your anniversary gift to her."

"What are you, twelve? And she wouldn't get it anyway. Hodge opens all her mail, since she can't be bothered."

"Even better. Actually I'd kind of like to see the look on his face..." he smiled to himself.

"Anyway, you don't even know where my vibrator is," she said.

"On your bookcase behind Pride and Prejudice and Alice in Wonderland," he quipped.

"Not anymore. And you're sick, Jace." She sighed. "Fine. But don't expect me to keep Mr. AFI continuously entertained. If you're giving me the opportunity, I'm getting wasted. I need a good binge drinking night before the shoot next week."

"That's fine with me. I'll tell Hodge to be ready around nine thirty," he said, going to ascend the stairs to get dressed.

"This should be interesting," Isabelle said to herself before getting up off the couch and making her way up the stairs as well.


	21. Chapter 21

"Why am I doing this again?"

"Because you love me endlessly and it's your mission in life to please me."

Isabelle made a disgusted snort that extremely contradicted her brother's statement. He just smiled. "Oh come on, Iz. You said you wanted to get drunk and party before Cali next week. I have single-handedly granted your wish. You should be thanking me, really."

"Oh yes. I'm so sorry, my lord. Thank you for dragging me to Cherry Bomb with Pippi Longstocking and Sid Vicious. I'm forever in your debt," she said with mock deference, her hand over her heart.

Jace rolled his eyes as they pulled up to a quaint Brooklyn brownstone. Hodge honked once and out came Clary and Simon. Simon seemed to hesitate at the sight of the limo, but followed Clary down the steps to Hodge, who had the door open for them. They slid in and an awkward silence set in amongst the group.

"Um, thanks for inviting us," Clary said, trying to break the silence.

"Oh it's cool. You're the first one I thought of for company on my night on the town," Jace said smoothly. Simon let out a disgusted sigh. Isabelle seemed to mirror his attitude. This was going to be quite a long night for the two of them.

After an hour long silent limo ride, they pulled up in front of Cherry Bomb, where the car was nearly surrounded by flashing cameras. Hodge opened the door for them and they slid out one by one, plastering on smiles as they came into view of the dozens of paparazzi screaming at them.

"Over here! Jace! Look right here! Isabelle!" they yelled constantly. Isabelle could tell Clary and Simon were a little overwhelmed, but Simon handled it with surprising grace. He took her arm in a gentlemanly fashion that almost made her laugh. It was kind of cute, she allowed. Clary, on the other hand, clung to Jace like she was afraid one of the photographers was going to snatch her up and make off with her.

When they were finally inside, Jace led them right to his usual VIP table, seating himself in the corner and pulling Clary in next to him. Simon sat next to Clary on one side, and Isabelle took her seat on the opposite side beside Jace. The implication was clear that they were _not_ here _together_.

When the waitress made her way over to them, they all ordered drinks, each a little stronger than their usual. Isabelle took the cake, though, ordering two shots of Patron and an Adios Mother Fucker. Jace gave her a look, but she ignored it. She rarely had stuff that hard and in such high quantity, but she felt like she needed it to get through the night.

"So, how's your latest work coming?" Jace asked Clary.

"Oh, I guess it's okay. Taking a little longer than I expected to get the right tone out of the oils from..."

And just like that, Isabelle tuned them out. She was in no mood to listen to Clary drone on about art while Jace just nodded like an idiot when Clary clearly knew he had no fucking clue what she was talking about. They were so pathetic. Nothing in their relationship was based on genuine truth.

When the waitress came back with the drinks, Isabelle downed her two shots back to back and sat back to enjoy the view of the dance floor. She noticed that she _really_ liked the way the glitter sparkled all different colors as the different colored lights hit it, causing her to go a bit dizzy every now and then. Patron worked fast, which is just what she needed, apparently. She looked over to Simon and his Gin and Juice. Who did he think he was? Snoop Dogg? And Jace and Clary with their matching Long Island Iced Teas. They were so pathetic.

She did notice that she got more cynical with every sip of her AMF. She tended to be a very happy and friendly drunk, but she had to power through the "this place pisses me off and I can't believe I'm here" vibe that she got when she was halfway buzzed. Pretty soon, though, she would be on cloud nine. She could hardly wait for the numbness to set in.

**Two Hours Later**

"I bet you a Benjamin you can't!"

"That's all? A hundred bucks? That's not even worth it!"

"That's just cuz you can't do it anyway!"

"I fucking can!"

"Fine, then. Five hundred clams says you can't do it."

"You got yourself a bet, blondie." Simon held out his hand and it took Jace a minute to find it in the dark in his drunken haze. He missed a couple of times, hitting Isabelle in the left boob as he reached across to Simon. She was kind of in the way, considering she was sitting on his lap.

"Waitress! Give us twenty shots of Stoli right here!" Jace exclaimed as he slapped his hand down on the table. Simon looked increasingly determined. In some far corner of her mind, she knew this was entirely stupid, but she just couldn't bring herself to tell them to stop. It was kind of hot, after she thought about it. She really wanted to see how many shots Simon could take before he tanked. She also didn't tell him that Jace was a seasoned drunk and probably could take all 20 by himself.

When the waitress returned with their order, they set them up, ten for each of them. Clary, who was probably the only one still within the confines of just a buzz, held up her hand.

"Ready?"

Simon and Jace eyed each other like they were Gladiators in the ring. Isabelle giggled.

"Set!"

Their hands twitched towards their first shot glasses.

"Go!"

They began. Jace started throwing them back, taking about two seconds to each shot. Isabelle had seen him do this before; she knew he was amazing at it. But then she looked at Simon's progress.

He was taking them two at a time, putting both up and knocking them back. He only had four left to Jace's six. She started cheering him on like a valley girl.

When Simon slammed his last two shots down, Jace still had three on the table. "HA! You owe me five hundred motherfuckin' big ones, blondie! And all those are going on YOU'RE tab!" He slurred as he sat back, looking satisfied with himself. Isabelle couldn't stop giggling.

"Oh my God! That was awesome! Jace, you're officially knocked off your pedestal!" She taunted. Then she leaned in and gave the winner a sloppy kiss on the cheek.

Jace definitely didn't like the sound of that. Isabelle figured he wouldn't. "Fuck you all. I want a remash!" Now Clary was giggling, still hanging onto his huge bicep with her tiny hands. Simon was laughing uncontrollably. It seemed that everyone but Jace was at the stage where pretty much anything was funny. Jace just sat there fuming.

Eventually, Simon's laughter was muffled by Isabelle's sloppy lips against his. She noted with interest that he tasted faintly of cigarettes and vanilla vodka. They started kissing with abandon, forgetting where they were and that there were other people in close vicinity. This seemed to push Jace to the end of his rope.

All of a sudden, Isabelle was shoved to the side, into the booth. Jace grabbed the collar of Simon's jacket and started yelling.

"Keep the fuck off my sister! You fucking grungy asshole!" he was yelling. Simon seemed to have frozen in place. Perhaps the sight of a famous action hero's extremely powerful fist cocked and ready to launch at your face made you sober up a little. Isabelle was pissed now.

"Fuck off Jace! Or did you notice that _I_ was kissing _him_?"

"You're better than this fucking reject!" Jace yelled at her, his words slurring. He turned back to Simon, and pulled his fist back again. Simon didn't flinch, but he looked weary. Everyone was frozen in place, except for Jace, who had started to propel forward. Then he stopped dead in his tracks.

"Out. _Now_."

Isabelle registered a very tall, very sparkly, and very pissed off person standing between Jace and Simon, arms crossed and death glare in place. She also registered (for the first time, it seemed), that he was rather ridiculously hot. His green-gold eyes seemed like laser beams boring into Jace's face. The big buff blonde flinched and backed up.

"I mean it. You have one minute," the glittery owner said.

"But, why me? He started-"

"Because I saw him beat you fair and square, and because I didn't see him throw any punches."

"But I didn't throw a punch eith- "

"And most importantly," he interrupted Jace again. "You annoy the shit out of me. Out." He made a shooing motion with is hands.

"No! Make him leave!" Jace protested in a whiney voice, getting up in his face. But then he shut up.

"Oh, no you didn't," Magnus said with a menacing snap, side to side head flick and everything. Isabelle almost laughed, because he pulled it off so well. He looked like a devilishly scary diva. He put a hand on Jace's chest (who was quite dumbfounded at this point) and pushed him backwards. He shooed again, and finally Jace turned around.

Clary gave them an apologetic look, which was not received by either Isabelle or Simon, who had gone back to giggling over each other, with her sitting on his lap again. She followed a sulky Jace out the door and hailed a cab for them.

As they left, Magnus sniffed haughtily and turned to make his way back to his usual corner with Barbie. Isabelle paid him no mind other than mentally thanking him for getting Jace the fuck away from her. Sometimes he pissed her off so fucking much. She was her own person, damnit. She could make out with whoever she wanted to.

Thinking about making out made her remember that she wanted more of that cigarettes and vodka taste. She leaned in and shoved her tongue in Simon's mouth again. He was a willing recipient, and they continued to lay sloppy kisses on each other, sometimes missing each other's mouths. All of a sudden, she pulled her mouth off his.

"Oh my God! I love this song!" she exclaimed as Lady Gaga began to blare from the speakers. "Come on! Let's go dance!"

"Ah- I don't think so. I think I'll just watch," Simon said nervously.

"This isn't a strip club. You don't get to just watch me dance by myself. Although, if you want to go to a strip club; for just the two of us; that can be arranged." Damn, she was bold tonight. But she couldn't help the words tumbling from her mouth.

Simon looked at her with a hopeful but apprehensive expression, like he was wondering if she was serious. Why would he doubt her? She'd said it, hadn't she?

"What's the matter? You never seen a naked model before?"

"No, it's not that- I just- "

"Well shut up and let's go!" She grabbed his hand and yanked him out of the seat.

Apparently, Jace had told Hodge that Izzy and Simon were still at the club, because he was waiting outside when they walked out. Several cameras flashing made Isabelle a little dizzy, so she clung to Simon's arm so she didn't fall and have it end up on TMZ. Although, this would probably end up on there anyway.

"Home Hodge!" she yelled. He looked a little perturbed, but she was a grown woman he respected that, and didn't say anything.

**Song for this section: Peacock by Katy Perry (oh, Izzy. You bad bad girl!)**

Once they were inside the darkened interior of the limo, Izzy proceeded to straddle Simon's legs and leaned in to kiss him again. She couldn't understand why she was so attracted to him all of a sudden. Honestly, she had thought he was a little annoying earlier. But now, he was like a living, breathing aphrodisiac. The more she got, the more she wanted.

She tugged on his lower lip and he moaned into her mouth, making her sigh. She could feel his obvious arousal pushing at her core through their clothes, which made her extremely wet. It had been a good while since she'd had a good drunken makeout with a hot guy in the backseat of her parents' limo. She used to do it all the time in her teens, just to annoy them. But now she was so busy all the time, she never had the time.

They pulled up in front of the Lightwood mansion, and Hodge opened the door for them, and cleared his throat. Isabelle jumped off Simon's lap (while he frantically tried to hide his situation that she revealed in the process), and yanked him out and up the steps.

They crashed through the door in the living room, making their way up the stairs haphazardly while groping and pulling off clothes, depositing them along the stairs without a care. When they got to her room finally, she only had on her Agent Provocateur red bra and panties, while he was in his jeans and boxers. She slammed the door closed, probably waking everyone else in the house. She didn't care.

"Isabelle, are you- su-sure about this?" he panted, clearly wanting an affirmative answer, but being the gentleman and asking first. After all, his ten vodka shots on top of everything else he'd had before that was hitting him hard now.

"Just shut up," she said. She shoved him down on her ivory and lavender bedspread and yanked his jeans off down his legs, throwing them across the room. She pulled down his boxers and revealed the most glorious erection she'd seen in a long ass time. Her mouth practically watered. But she wasn't in the mood to suck it, honestly. She wanted it. Right. Now.

She left him there standing at attention while she stumbled over to her dresser. She pulled out a condom and threw it at him. In his drunken haze, he had to try a few times to get it open and on in one piece. Eventually, he managed.

She stalked toward him while he looked on with desire-glazed eyes. As she approached the bed, she reached behind her and unhooked her bra, letting it fall to the floor. He gasped, and she smiled smugly. As she crawled up on the bed, she hooked her thumbs in her underwear and let them fall as well.

He scooted back up on the bed, pulling her in for another sloppy kiss, in which there was much lip biting and sighing and moaning. Straddling his hips, she rubbed her wet core against him and he let out a grunt. She reached between them and positioned him at her entrance. Then, she slowly lowered herself down, throwing her head back.

"Holy fuuuucckkkkk."


	22. Chapter 22

The first thing she felt was the worst headache she'd ever known. She was sure that she groaned out loud, extremely unladylike, but she couldn't help it. The pain cut through to her very core. It was times like this that she resolved never to drink ever again. It had happened a couple of times since she'd turned 18.

She very slowly cracked one eye open, and immediately shut it against the warm light streaming through her open window. From the angle she briefly glimpsed, she assumed it was early afternoon. Apart from her headache from hell, her entire body was sore. That was odd, considering she'd never had a hangover that extended further than a headache and acute nausea. But sure enough, her leg muscles, her abs, her arms, everything was sore. And I do mean _everything_.

She began to feel around in the tangled sheets for her phone to check the time. Her hand slid across smooth silk, fingers looking for hard plastic. Instead, they encountered smooth skin layered over lean muscle.

What?

Forgetting her headache, she opened her eyes and sat up quickly, looking beside her.

Oh. My. God.

Still sleeping, looking rather like a 15 year old punky kid, was Simon. Clary's friend Simon. And he was very, very naked. As was she. Dear God, she hoped against hope that it wasn't true. He was so- ugh! He was not even on her level. No, they couldn't have slept together. I mean, maybe _slept_ together, for some bizarre reason, but no fucking whatsoever. But she had to admit, the evidence was extremely strong for the contrary.

How to make bad things worse? She noticed that he actually had morning wood. All she thought was that he better be dreaming about her. If they had, in fact, done the deed, she knew her skills were fucking amazing. She wished she could remember if it was good on her end. There was one possible clue, one thing that seemed to correlate with an unbelievable bedroom experience.

She slid her hand over to his sleeping form again. She snaked it underneath the edge of her 650 thread count sheets, gingerly lifting it up. She gently leaned over to peer underneath.

_Damn_.

Okay, now she gave the grungy singer the benefit of the doubt. Jesus, no wonder she was sore. She set the sheet back down as softly as she could, so as not to wake him. But apparently, she wasn't gentle enough. She looked up at his face to catch him watching her.

"Morning," he said in a scratchy voice.

She scrunched up with a surly expression. "Hmph."

"Oh, very articulate after such a late night. I'm impressed," he quipped.

"Just consider last night an extreme lapse of judgment. I was shitfaced, and you took advantage of me. You should be ashamed," she said, lying back down and staring at the ceiling.

"On the contrary, my dear. You most certainly took advantage of _me._"

"In your dreams, Eddie Vedder. I don't do musicians."

"I think your policy changed last night."

"Hmph," she said again, abandoning the argument in favor of nursing her headache by rubbing her fingers against her temples.

He seemed to get the hint that she wanted to be alone. He slid over, throwing his legs over the side, his feet hitting the thick Persian carpet with little sound. She kept her eyes averted as he got up and looked around for his underwear. When he finally located them, he had a worried look on his face.

"I did come here clothed, didn't I?" he asked.

"As far as I know," she said, rolling her eyes.

"Well, I would like my clothes back, then."

"What makes you think I have them? I'm just as naked as you are."

"Technically, at the moment, more so."

"Shut up," she said. She sighed theatrically and winced as she sat up and climbed out of bed. She didn't even care if he looked; it was her job to be looked at anyway, and she worked damn hard to keep herself worth looking at. She crossed the room to the bathroom, grabbing her silk robe off the hook behind the door. She wrapped it around herself and padded out the door into the hallway, and found her hunch to be correct.

Their clothes were strewn all the way from the first floor to the landing down the hall from her room. She crept out and silently gathered them up before creeping back into her room. She threw his pile of black cotton and jeans at him, which he caught with surprising accuracy considering the amount of alcohol he consumed the night before. When she thought about it, his little victory over Jace still made her smile. Plus it was kind of hot. She screeched her thoughts to a halt after that one. That was _no_ way to be thinking about this random wannabe Johnny Rotten.

When she turned back to him, he'd dressed and was pulling on his ugly ass dirty Converse. What had she been _thinking_? She blamed it completely on the alcohol. She found nothing attractive about him whatsoever. Right?

He was walking to her door. "For what it's worth, you look ten times more beautiful with your makeup smeared like that than you do in those airbrushed pictures," he said. She was startled at the look in his eyes, but she let it slide. He turned and walked out her door.

**Song for this section: Candyman by Christina Aguilera (OF COURSE this would be Magnus' theme song in his head for Alec. Duh. LOL! And it's playing on the stereo)**

**Also, BTW, it's a week later.**

Magnus sighed contentedly, thinking of blue eyes and luscious lips.

"Would you quit that? You're making me feel inferior, and you're not even getting laid at the moment," Camille huffed from her place on the floor against the couch, her head in front of Magnus' shoulder as he lounged on the couch lazily.

"Oh, don't ruin my high by reminding me. Speaking of, how's the shriveled dick doing these days?"

"That's rich shriveled dick to you, and his ancient wife is back in town from Spain. Honestly, she should have stayed with the conquistadores and gotten herself stuffed full of all the mucho amor she could handle," she said without any attempt at the right accent, or grammar for that matter. "Richard doesn't want her anyway. He told me he wants to leave her, but if he did, he'd forfeit half his 38 million dollar net worth."

"Well, there's your first clue, honey. Rich man, but too dumb to sign a prenup? Bad form, dearie."

"On the contrary, it's the best decision a girl like me could make. If he refuses prenups, well, when he marries me and then divorces my ass for fucking the pool boy, I'll leave with half, too."

"I think that would be a quarter, technically, because ancient wife will have already had her cut by then. And who the hell fucks pool boys anymore?"

"Shut up, Magnus. Although I must say, I like this one so far."

"Come again?" he asked.

"Alexander. I like the effect he's had on you. You are decidedly less bitchy, and a shit ton less mopey these days. And the piano has been dusted, I noticed," she said with a kind expression. She knew how much the whole music thing meant to him. She'd been trying to get him to open up for years, but now, sometimes she couldn't get him to shut up.

"Thanks. I did that with my ass," he said.

Her head cocked up, her eyebrows raising slowly. She didn't say anything, letting her face ask what the hell he meant by that.

He just flicked his eyes toward the piano, then back at her. Then he rolled his eyes to the ceiling, feigning innocence, and let a small smile creep across his face. He looked like a spoiled child who'd just gotten something he wanted and was very satisfied with himself.

"Well, now I'm just jealous," Camille said, going back to the Cosmo that was lying across her lap.

"God, he's so delicious."

"Shut UP, Magnus. I already admitted it; you don't have to rub it in."

All of a sudden, he jumped up and over the back of the couch. "He even has a theme song," he said as he fiddled with the stereo. He could hear her groan and he smiled to himself. He scrolled through the iPod docked in the stereo until he found the song that he was looking for. When he found it, he turned it on and amped up the volume.

He pranced over in front of the couch and held out his arms. "Come on, you know you can't resist!"

She rolled her eyes, but smiled and grabbed his hands, letting him pull her up to standing. By now the beat was in full swing, and he wasted no time before twirling her around and pulling her in to his chest, only to push her away and yank her back by her arm before she got too far. She was laughing and dancing along in seconds.

"See? I told you that fun little gay date would pay off!" Magnus said with a laugh as he picked her up, her legs going around his waist for a second before he lifted her up and set her back down on her feet. It had been his idea a long time ago, when they were both newly single and extremely lonely. He proposed a date to something that could be put to use when they both found significant others again. She suggested swing dance classes. They were both extremely old souls, and happened to like the party favorite of the bygone era.

They hopped and slid and twirled around some more, before Camille was way too tired to go on for the rest of the song. "Okay, okay! I'm done!" she laughed breathlessly. He shrugged his shoulders as she sat down on the couch and watched him pick up his cell phone.

He proceeded to sing into it like a microphone, putting Christina to shame, and that was saying something. She sat back and listened to the voice she'd always longed to hear, the one that Alexander Lightwood had apparently called forth finally. It was so beautiful and full of life. He got flirty towards the end, of course, when the words became "he's got those lips like sugar caaaaane! Oh! Good things come for boys who wait! He's a one stop shop with a real big aahhh- ." At the last syllable, Magnus turned around and rolled his hips, poking his ass out. Camille couldn't help but giggle. Sometimes he could be so juvenile.

But then the end of the song came with Christina's big long Hey! on an unbelievable note. He let it open up wide, completely drowning her out. Now Camille was really jealous, but she was also happy it was finally getting to be enjoyed by someone. He kept singing into his cell/mic with his own little flourishes, until he stopped abruptly, staring at his phone. After another second, Camille heard it too.

He jumped over to the stereo and turned it off, putting his phone to his ear. "Hello?"

"Magnus?" that sweet voice said.

"Oh, hi Alec," Magnus said, pretty sure he was blushing for the second time ever in his life.

"You sounded really good by the way, " he sounded shy, but also chuckling.

"How much did you hear?"

"Pretty much the whole song," he said, laughing out loud now.

"Well, I'm glad you liked it, otherwise it would have been oh-so-excruciating for you."

"Nah, I'd have just hung up," Alec said.

"Touchè," Magnus replied with a smile. He tried to fight down his childish giddiness at the sound of Alec's voice. It had been almost a week since they'd last seen each other or talked, since Alec had practice every day. "So, what's up? You decide to quit the team and come back here?"

"I wish I could," Alec said, and it sounded like he meant it. "But I like soccer, too."

"As much as me?" Magnus fished.

"I think it's safe to say you're tied," he said.

"Okay, so what is it, then? You just wanna hear my sweet, sexy voice?"

"Well, there is that-" he sounded embarrassed again. He waited a moment before he went on. "But I was calling because I- I kind of- wanted to ask you-something."

"Mmhmm, ask away lovely," Magnus purred.

Alec gave a little nervous laugh before he continued. "I was just wondering- what we- are. Like, where do we stand?"

Magnus had to think about that for a moment. "Well, I feel like a 13 year old telling you this, but I really like you." He flipped Camille the bird when she made an exaggerated "awwww" face. She went back to petting Chairman Meow, who'd just now come out of hiding after all the commotion. "And, I'm assuming you like me?"

"Yes. I believe that's obvious," Alec said, but Magnus could tell he was smiling.

"And you haven't been seeing anyone else in Cali, have you? You're not having hot piano sex with anyone at the moment?"

It took Alec a second, while Camille choked on the sip of wine he caught her in the middle of. Chairman Meow jumped off her lap.

"No, not as far as I can remember," Alec said after a bit.

"Well, I haven't either. So would you say we are exclusive?"

"Um, I guess I would say that. Like, you're my- boyfriend?" the word seemed to get distorted coming out of his mouth, like he'd never said it before. Most likely, he never had, at least in reference to himself.

"If you want me to be."

"Yes," came the answer, softly.

"Your wish is my humble command," Magnus said, but he couldn't wipe the horrendously huge smile that had spread across his face. He felt like such a teenage girl right now, it was ridiculous.

"I was just sort of wondering, you know, after all the- stuff in New York. And plus, it would kind of hurt my feelings if you did that with everyone," Alec said seriously.

"I wouldn't dream of it," Magnus said in mock horror.

"Well, I'm glad we cleared that up," Alec said, sounding a little awkward. If it wasn't before, it was clear now that he'd never been in a relationship with anyone resembling a human being. "I've got to go, I'm kind of running late for practice. Big game tomorrow and all."

"Well by all means run along! Don't let me keep you. Though, I'm glad you finally called. I was beginning to have withdrawals," Magnus said.

"Me too," Alec said quickly, before he could catch himself. Magnus could practically hear his blush. He smiled wider.

"I'll talk to you soon?" Magnus asked hopefully.

"Yeah. I'll call you after the game tomorrow."

"Can't wait," Magnus purred.

"Goodbye Magnus," Alec said, a touch of longing in his voice.

"Bye, Alexander." Then, feeling like a high school sweetheart, "Good luck tomorrow."

"Thanks," Alec replied. Then they hung up.

Magnus let out another theatrical contented sigh and flopped down on the couch next to Camille.

"Well this is all very cute and adolescent and all, but after that little barf-tastic scene I am in dire need of hard liquor," Camille said, her arms crossed over her chest.

Magnus had no idea how he could keep up his cool exterior at Cherry Bomb tonight after that phone call, although he would give it a try.


	23. Chapter 23

"Miss Lightwood? Mr. Barker is waiting for you," said the timid assistant assigned to her that particular day. She was one of those would-be model hopefuls, trying desperately to get her foot in the door, but in the end just ended up annoying the shit out of Isabelle. She supposed she should be grateful she had an assistant at all; this shoot had been thrown together so haphazardly in the last two days that it was somewhat of a joke. The location fell through, so they were now shooting on the top floor of the Juicy Couture warehouse. They had set up the original set, which was a park bench strewn with tulle and pillows, for Isabelle and her random male counterpart to pose prettily on. Honestly, she thought it was ridiculous. She missed Italy dearly, and couldn't wait for fashion week to come back around.

"Yes, yes. I'm coming. Five more minutes, Leslie."

"Um, okay. Yes Miss Lightwood," she stammered. Isabelle had purposefully called her Leslie, knowing full well her name was Lindsey, just to see if the girl had enough balls to correct her. Obviously, she failed miserably. If she didn't have the womanly assertiveness to politely contradict a burgeoning young model, she certainly had no hope whatsoever of making it in this business. She would have to push herself through the red tape and who-you-know bullshit just to get her headshots seen, and Isabelle doubted she'd ever have the guts. Poor girl.

When her five minutes had passed, she sighed deeply and heaved herself out of the chair she was in. She was currently wearing a skin tight taffeta dress in a ghastly eggshell color. Everyone knew off-white looked ridiculous on her skin. But whatever. They'd fix it in retouching. She just wanted to get this stupid day over so she could go watch Alec's game at five. She had budgeted about 2 hours to shower, change, and get to the stadium in Carson. Nigel better have his damned shot by then. She didn't care what he said, she was leaving at three. He could kiss her ass if she was too low in this shot or too bent over in that one.

"Finally," he huffed when she walked back out. "You'd think you were special or something, taking as many breaks as you do. You have to go puke up your three celery sticks you ate this morning?"

She didn't even dignify that with a response. She simply trotted over to the bench, lay down over the other model's lap, and proceeded to pose in a very regal manner (as regal as one could be, draped over the lap of a half-naked man, she corrected in her head).

"Seriously? Come on, Isabelle! I need better face than that!" He shouted as he clicked away. "Show the dress, dearie. Not your fat ass!"

"You know, I didn't have to do this ridiculous excuse for a spread anyway. I agreed on such short notice, I should be claiming twice as much as you're giving me. I've done Dior, Chanel, and Dolce. What the fuck do I need with this crap?"

"Name dropping. You've actually stooped to name-dropping to prove your worth. I thought you were better than that, _Miss _Lightwood," he sneered. She waited until he raised his camera again and shot the finger at the lens. He didn't say anything, just kept clicking as she continued to change positions a dozen more times. A few were decidedly more provocative than she would have liked to appear in a magazine, but she pretty much just went with it. She didn't give a fuck, and she wanted out of here.

By 2:15, Nigel waved her away, and she dashed out to her dressing room. She ripped off the dress by herself (despite being sewn into it that morning by three different assistants), threw on her sweats and Henley top, grabbed her purse and darted out the door. Her red Cadillac was waiting in the parking lot and she smiled as she slid behind the wheel. No matter what Jace said, she loved this car. She had literally taken the commercial job just for the free car from Cadillac. She grinned as she started up the purring engine.

She turned up The Runaways on her iPod and sped out of the lot toward her hotel. Alec had offered her the use of his apartment, but she declined. That was just- weird. She couldn't figure why, but it bugged her to share such a small space with her brother, when they were both grown. Their parents' mansion was one thing; they could each have an entire 3000 square foot floor to themselves if they wanted. But Alec's LA apartment was the size of her bedroom at home. She never understood how he managed (or why he didn't buy a new one with his ridiculous salary). But he said it was the closest one to Carson that had an attached garage and wasn't massively obnoxious. She supposed her oldest brother was the minimalist in the family.

She arrived at her hotel and handed the keys to the valet as he greeted her. She was praised again by the doorman, and again by the desk clerk. Really, she thought, can't you find someone else to fawn over? She was tired of acknowledging every little detail of her face all day; she didn't need it being called to attention when she was on her leisure time.

When she reached her room on the 28th floor, she slung her purse into the plush, suede upholstered chair in the foyer. (Yes, her hotel room has a foyer.) She made her way to the bathroom, stripping clothes as she went and leaving them along the floor. She stopped when she reached the door, fully naked. She looked back at the trail of clothes leading back to the foyer, and her mind was suddenly yanked back to a week before. Smooth, lean muscled arms around her. Softly curling brown hair against her face. Eager hands searching her body for her most sensitive spots.

She shook her head to rid it of the memories that had (against her will) been steadily returning to her throughout the week. She still couldn't believe that she'd gotten so shitfaced that she'd slept with a random musician. What on EARTH was she thinking? Oh well. The past was the past, and she was going to forget that night ever happened. Although, she would remember the part where Simon whipped Jace's ass at shots. And also that Jace had threatened to hit Simon across the jaw for _Isabelle_ kissing him. And also that Magnus Bane had kicked Jace out of Cherry Bomb. (That was still hilarious to remember). But most hilarious of all was when she saw Jace the next day, and he was complaining that he had to start back filming in Boston the next day, and the makeup artist was going to shit a brick.

Isabelle had been kind of pissed at Clary for leaving with Jace after he'd acted like such an ass, but she'd thought nothing of it at the time (courtesy of the alcohol, of course). But when she saw Jace, she immediately knew why Clary had wanted to get outside. Isabelle had figured they'd go off and fuck somewhere. As it turns out, Clary had ridden in the cab with Jace, and had made the driver take her home immediately. Then, on her front doorstep, she'd let Jace have it. He said the worst verbal abuse he'd ever endured. Simon was her best friend, and he was such an asshole for wanting to hit him, and Isabelle was a grown woman and she could kiss and sit on who she wanted, all that jazz. Then, she apparently thought he didn't get the picture clear enough. So, she'd planted her knuckles into his left eye.

The entire left side of Jace's face was one big purple mess. And the sucky thing was, they'd already filmed all the action sequences and most of the end, so there was no advantage to having ready-made injuries. They were doing the beginning, where apparently he's supposed to still be pretty, so he was basically in for a long ass make-up session every single morning to cover it up. On top of that, his jaw didn't move correctly without him wincing a little every time. Isabelle hadn't laughed/cried that hard in years.

As those thoughts eventually swung her around back to that night and her tryst with Simon, she shook her head again. It would do her no good to dwell on the past. She tried to put it out of her head as she slid into the warm, soothing Jacuzzi tub fizzing with LUSH bath salt. She inhaled the sweet lavender scent and let it calm her. She had to admit, no other had kept popping up in her mind so much after she'd had them. And she'd been with two or three to-die-for men. Men whose pretty faces, not to mention their ridiculous bodies, would make weaker girls weep. So, what was it about this grungy guitar player that made her thoughts keep coming back for more? She fought them off one last time as she let the bubbles consume her.

**Song for this section: Adrenaline by 12 Stones (LOVE this song. Upbeat and crazy enough for this scene, and also, if you listen to the lyrics, there's a subliminal Alec messageâ€¦hehe)**

It felt so good to be back on the playing field again. Yeah, sure, they'd scrimmaged like madmen since they'd come off hiatus, but this was the real deal. His adrenaline was pumping like wildfire, preparing his muscles for the heat to come. His legs were quivering to get going, his chest already starting to heave with the effort of heavy breathing. He was jogging in place, trying to keep his muscles warm, occasionally stretching his quads, just waiting for the signal to line up for the national anthem.

His intense excitement was partially because Izzy had gotten to actually be present at this game. It'd been years since she'd physically attended one of his games; probably since he was in the junior club in New York. He was proud to have his little sister cheering him on from the stands. Well, technically, she was in a private box high above him, but it was all the same. He was glad for her presence.

As the announcer's voice came over the loud speakers, asking audience members to remove their hats and face the north end of the field for the national anthem, Alec tried to get his thoughts in order. Admittedly, he'd been inundated with thoughts of smooth black hair and exotic yellow-green eyes all week. It had fucked him up in practice a few times, but he was trying to push them down. He tried not to think about the fact that he now had an official boyfriend. Nor that said official boyfriend was half a world away from him, and that hurt. Nor that said official boyfriend had the best tongue on the planet, and the most nimble hands, and the softest lips- .

He was brought back to reality by the end of the anthem being signaled by a loud gunshot. He shook his head to clear his thoughts once more and headed over to the bench. He listened to the coach give out his opening strategies and then listened to Landon give his captain-esque pep talk. Alec tried very hard to commit to the huddle, but he couldn't help where his brain was going. With one last effort, he went through his own little relaxation and focus routine that he'd done for years in times of stress. After a few repetitions of deep breaths and visualizing the game, he was back in it. He was finally ready to play a damn good game of soccer. And he was going to let Dallas have it.

The game started well enough, with LA getting possession from the start. The ball was dribbled down the field toward the Burn's goal, their keeper looking alert and ready. Landon was working it around and in between his legs with his usual skill, and Alec watched intently. He was wide open, and Landon saw; he passed it to Alec with lightning speed, and Alec went to aim it toward the goal. But, just as his foot was about to connect with leather, it was snatched away and careened down the field by the nearest Dallas player.

"Fuck!" he yelled, and went off after him. In a matter of seconds, Dallas was launching the ball at Donovan in the goal, and the rest watched with strained hope. Of course, Ricketts batted the ball out of range of the goal. The LA crowd cheered.

A couple of minutes later, David had the ball between his feet and was maneuvering it around several Dallas players with ease. He sent it flying toward Dallas's end and again, Landon latched onto it. He managed to get it about four or five feet down the field before another player swiped it from under him. But then, by a stroke of luck, LA retrieved it again. The small battle went on for a good five minutes in one corner of the Dallas end, while the Burn keeper stood watchful and ready.

The ball came bolting toward Alec, who fought off two players to get it closer to the goal so he could take his shot. And take it he did, only to have it stopped at the right corner by the keeper. Damnit, that was twice in 20 minutes! He'd never missed twice in 20 minutes! He was, quite possibly, their second best scorer after Landon. This was bullshit. Maybe his thoughts weren't as clear as he assumed they were. Could he be unconsciously somewhere else? It was highly likely. Once again, he tried his best not to think of seductively lined almond-shaped eyes, or smooth tanned skin. He tried to ban his mind of images of tight leather pants and sparkly eyelashes. But the scenes just kept flashing across his mind's eye. For a second, he closed his eyes and gave a final, incredible effort to stop thinking about Magnus and his long, nimble fingers, his lustrous black locks, his simply intoxicating voice when it whispered dirty things in his ear-

"Buzz, look out!"

Alec snapped his eyes open just in time to be knocked to the ground hard. It knocked the wind out of him, and he had to cough a few times before sitting up.

"Fuck! Sorry, guys," he panted, hands on his knees as the opposite player passed the ball down the field.

"You want to have a nap? Go back home!" David yelled from midfield, the amplification of his voice making his accent infinitely more annoying. Alec shot him the finger.

"Pay attention, yeah? Don't know what's been with you for the past week, but you gotta get your head outta your ass," Landon said, not unkindly, smacking him on the back hard before running off. Alec shook his head, caught his breath, and hurried off. This was going to be a long ass game.


	24. Chapter 24

She glided through the elevator doors and into the living room, only to be bombarded with the sound of Dancing Through Life. She rounded the corner to see Magnus at the piano, plucking away at the keys and singing along under his breath, her second favorite song from Wicked. **(aha! See how I stuck that in there? If you haven't seen Adam's Fiyero, which you should have if you clicked the video, It's. Fricking. Adorable.)** She'd always enjoyed As Long as You're Mine the most. She wondered vaguely what he would sound like singing that one. She could dream, couldn't she?

She deposited the overpriced, over-caloric Chinese cuisine on the coffee table and went to sit next to him, watching his fingers grace the ivory and onyx in a fluid way that she was growing quite accustomed to. She once again thanked the stars for Alexander Lightwood. Magnus still couldn't be persuaded to sing in front of strangers, but he was well on his way to being comfortable singing for any of their closest friends, she imagined.

When the song was over, she clapped daintily, as if she were at the opera. He blushed a little.

"To what do I owe the pleasure of your dear company, Miss Camille?" he intoned in a formal voice.

"I have brought sustenance, my lord!" she quipped, her hand over her heart.

"Bring it forth, my dear! Let the feast begin!" he said with a flourish. They both slid off the bench and made their way to the couch. "Seriously, though. What's up? You usually call before you try to bribe me with Chinese, " he asked suspiciously.

"It's nothing I _want_ really. I just thought you'd like to see this," she said, picking up the remote and turning on the TV.

"I already know how to braise a ham, thank you," Magnus said.

"Shut up," she retorted. "This," she said as she landed on ESPN2.

"What's this?" Magnus asked, not really looking at the screen.

"It's your boy toy. Fucking up royally by the looks of it, so far."

"What?" And then he looked at the screen, seeing the score for the first time. They were down to the last 10 minutes, and neither side had yet to score. Camille had been watching absently, partly because she was a tad obsessed with Donovan Ricketts and his tall, muscular physique. They'd been hammering him all night, and he hadn't yet let a ball through. On the other hand, she'd partially paid attention to Magnus' boyfriend and seen that every single time he went to score, it was either knocked away easily by the goalie, or missed the goal entirely. She didn't know very much about the sport, but she did know about hot guys. And apart from Landon Donovan, Alexander Lightwood was supposedly the best scorer on the team. Not from the looks of it-

"Yeah. He's been sucking it up all night. Tried for the goal about six times now, and no dice," she said.

"Well, he's probably just stressed. This is his first game after the long break. Maybe he's just rusty," Magnus said, sounding like a soccer mom. She giggled to herself at her internal joke.

"Or _maybe_ he's just too inundated with visions of yellow-green eyes and a pretty, pretty voice to pay attention to the game," she teased.

"Nah, he's not that hung up on me," Magnus said, looking a little bashful. She'd never actually seen him in love before, but it looked good on him.

"My money's on that he can't concentrate on the ball because he's concentrating on another certain set of- "

"Shut up, Camille. Watch the game!" Magnus said. For once in his entire lifetime, he was riveted on the screen, watching a sports event. She thought to document the scene on her camera phone, but decided not to break his little bond with the sweaty number 32 on the screen. She smiled again as she spooned pork fried rice into her mouth.

The game went on for the last ten minutes much like it had for the rest of the time. Alexander had tried to score three more times, to no avail. Once, it was batted away. The next time, it went up to the top right corner, looking like it was going to go in. Magnus and Camille scooted to the edge of the couch with anticipation, only to scream at the screen when it nicked off the side pole. The third time, he shot it towards the goal, but it went incredibly wide, hitting the wall on the left side of the field.

"This is such bullshit. I know he's better than this," Camille said.

"Just give him a little time," Magnus said, his eyes never straying from the television.

"He only has one more minute before they go into overtime!" she whined. "If he's going to be a badass, he needs to do it quick!"

"I have faith," Magnus vowed.

They watched with rapt attention as the ball once again fired across the field toward Dallas' goal. It went through two or three players, being passed around swiftly to keep it away from the Dallas players. They were aggressive as ever, trying to regain possession. Then, it rocketed over to Landon. He juggled it a few more yards down the field, trying to get loose from the two players manning him. He saw his opening, and took it.

The ball shot like a canon over to blue eyed number 32, and he lined up to take his shot. With 12 seconds left, she didn't have much faith in him, but she waited in anticipation all the same. Magnus was a statue next to her, his eyes glued to his boyfriend's figure.

And then, his leg cocked back. He let it fly just as another player slid across the ground to go for the ball at his feet. The camera followed the ball; it looked like it was in slow motion. It rocketed past the box, past the goalie and into the net just as the clock wound down.

"Fuck yes! I knew he could do it! That's my baby right there!" Magnus had leaped off the couch and was now dancing around the room with joy.

"Oh my God, I didn't think it was going to happen," Camille said, still in awe. The cameras were following the team as they jumped up on the bench and shouted and hugged each other. They caught the ones on the field as they chest-bumped and high fived. Then, the camera panned over to the spot where Alexander had been standing when he'd kicked the winning goal.

Something wasn't right. The camera stayed on the spot, which was now surrounded by a group of men in LA Galaxy sweats, carrying various colored boxes. She couldn't see what they were fussing about, but it put a bad feeling in her stomach.

Then, a couple of the men stood up from their kneeling positions and her fears were confirmed.

"Magnus," she said, her voice heavy. He was still jumping around the room like a lunatic. "Magnus!"

He stopped and turned to look at her. "What? Can't you see I'm celebrating?"

"Magnus, stop celebrating," she said. "Come here."

He came over and sat down on the couch and stared at the screen. She saw the moment his features changed from exultant to confused to terrified, and she knew he was seeing what she saw.

His boyfriend lay on his back on the wet grass of the field, surrounded by trainers. They were lifting his left leg up and down gingerly, but that did no good. His face contorted in pain every time they touched him, and she could see his cheeks were burning and his breath was rapid. The trainers got up, leaving only one behind to watch over him. He lay still, face still looking like misery, and he wasn't getting up. Camille's heart cringed for Magnus. He looked horrified.

The announcers had been going on about the incident the entire time, but they had both tuned them out. They just wanted to see what was happening on the field. Two paramedics returned with a stretcher, and her heart sank. She wanted him to just lie there and gather his strength for a moment, then say he would be fine and slowly get up. Clearly, that wasn't going to happen. She wanted to look away, but she couldn't. Then, the paramedics leaned down and lifted up his body, and the camera caught the shriek of agony that ripped from his lungs. She heard Magnus gasp quietly at the sound, his hand going to cover his mouth.

"He'll be okay, babe," she cooed, putting her arms around his shoulders in a sisterly gesture. "He'll be okay."

He didn't really respond, just kept looking at the TV as they wheeled him to the sideline.

* * *

This is why she hated sports! One moment, she's jumping up and down celebrating her brother's winning goal, the next she's on the verge of tears as they wheel him off to the sidelines. She gathered up her coat and her purse and rushed out of the box and into the elevator. She told the doorman she wanted field level.

"Miss Lightwood, you can't- "

"I don't care what you say I can't do! I want to see my brother!" she wailed.

Before he could respond, the door opened on the field level and she rushed out. She found the man she knew to be the assistant coach and grabbed him by the arm.

"Where is he?" she asked. "Where's Alec? I wanna see him!"

"Calm down, Isabelle. Hold on just a second, okay?" he soothed, putting a hand on her shoulder.

"No! I want to see him now!" she cried.

Just then, there was a great commotion in the hallway from the door that led from the locker room. She saw them wheel him out of the double doors and she rushed over to him.

"Alec! Are you okay? Say something! Alec?"

But she got infinitely more scared when he didn't even open his eyes. That couldn't be right; a minute ago he was screaming and wailing. He couldn't be unconscious now. What was the matter?

"They sedated him so he'd stop squirming and howling," the assistant coach said as he came up behind her. "He'll be taken to Cedars Sinai, but I don't think they'll let you ride with him."

"Fine. I'll take my car. But they better let me see him when I get there," she said. She thanked him and ran out to the parking lot that was reserved for the team and VIPs. She shot into the driver seat of her car, turned the key, and it roared to life. She pounded the gas pedal, determined to beat the ambulance there and to see him before they locked him away behind emergency room doors.


	25. Chapter 25

He awoke to an incredibly bright light and his back was killing him. On the other hand, he couldn't feel his leg at all. Had they cut it off? Just as well. He was glad to be rid of it, since it was the source of the most excruciating pain he'd experienced in his life up till now. He didn't remember the exact moment it happened. He just went from kicking as hard as he could to being on the ground and screaming like a prepubescent girl. He didn't care what the team thought of him. Let them feel it, then they'll see.

He shifted slightly on the bed, causing the papery crinkling sound of cheap sheets to fill his ears. Hospital. He was in a hospital. That would explain the ridiculously hard bed and crappy pillowcase. And, why he couldn't feel his leg. He supposed they _had_ cut it off, or numbed it somehow. As his faculties slowly returned to him (he was quite heavy and groggy at the moment), he tried to open his eyes. He could hear a pleasant humming, with an articulated word every now and then, as if the voice was trying its best to be quiet, but it couldn't help itself; it had to make noise. It was pretty.

He looked first directly in front of him, which turned out to be the ceiling, normally enough. He turned his head toward the sound he'd been hearing, carrying over the beeps and clicks of the monitors surrounding him. He saw a large newspaper seeming to hover in mid-air. No- Wait- there were four fingers on each side. And legs clad in dark jeans underneath. The newspaper was wearing designer jeans? And singing? This was too bizarre. Oh! The newspaper was also wearing limited edition Diesel boots (he knew this, because Magnus had a pair just like them that he liked to talk incessantly about). The newspaper bent over, like it had dropped something, lowering down slowly. He watched curiously. The newspaper had shiny black hair, a cartilage piercing, long eyelashes, intoxicating yellow-green eyes, dark kohl lining them- 

"I know I'm beautiful, darling. You don't have to tell me," he said. The singing had stopped. He wanted the singing newspaper to come back.

"Huh?" was all Alec could manage. His throat was scratchy.

"You looked like you were about to burst into a homage to my sexiness. I'm telling you that you don't have to. I'm perfectly aware," he said, one perfectly arched brow rising. Dear God, that eyebrow thing again-

That's preposterous. Magnus was the only one in the world that could do that to him-

"Magnus!" he blurted, coming to his senses.

"As far as I know," Magnus returned with a smile. Although, as Alec examined him closer, the smile was the only thing bright and warm about him. His face was gaunt; the eyeliner smeared and looking like it was three days old. His hair hung limp around his almond-shaped eyes. Under those, there were purple bags that looked like bruises. He looked like he'd been awake for days.

"How long have you been here?" he asked.

"Here like in this chair here? Or here like on this coast here? Cuz I'd say there's about an hour's difference."

"In that chair, here," Alec clarified.

"About two days," Magnus said nonchalantly.

"I've been out for _two days_?" Alec was flabbergasted.

"Well, not two days straight. You've kind of been in and out. I'm actually sort of jealous. Apparently morphine is the 'happy' drug..." he trailed off, raising an eyebrow at Alec again. _Oh_. So that's why he couldn't feel his leg... And also why he felt like he was alternating between floating and sinking into the hard bed. "You've got local anesthetics all below your knee," he added. "They gave you those, then you kept raving about not being able to feel your leg and that they'd cut it off, so they shot up your morphine dosage and knocked you out so you'd shut up," he laughed. Alec blushed.

"What happened?" Alec still couldn't remember correctly; the details were fuzzy.

"According to the replay that we watched at least 600 times with the doctor, just as you kicked the winning goal another player came up and clipped your ankle and you went down. Apparently the doctor is smarter than we are, since he was able to figure out what had happened pretty much based on the tape. An X-ray confirmed it," Magnus said.

"Confirmed what, exactly?" Alec asked. At this, Magnus looked a little uncomfortable. "Come on. Don't sugarcoat it. Just tell me, because I'll find out sooner or later."

Magnus sighed. "You hyperextended your Achilles' tendon and there's a 7 inch fracture going up your tibia." Alec let this sink in. Okay, so he'd be out for a while. A good while. He could live with that. As long as he could finish out the season. He raised his eyebrows at Magnus which, truth be told, took a lot of effort.

"Do you even know what a tibia is, Magnus?" he asked, trying to sound playful. He sort of managed.

"I didn't before that hour long chat session with McDreamy wannabe. But I do know it's your shin, and it's pretty important." He looked a little smug, and Alec laughed lightly. "Seriously, we came to a fast agreement that he's got nothing on the actual McDreamy. In fact, we're pretty sure he's not even in the same league as George Clooney, though his doctor days are pretty far back-"

Alec's head snapped up (well, as much as it could when it weighed about a hundred pounds). "Who's we? You keep saying we," he said.

"Oh, your sister. Isabelle," he clarified, as if Alec didn't know who his sister was. He guessed Magnus read the bewildered look on his face that was kind of planted there for the time being, courtesy of morphine. "Your brother calls nearly every three hours. He's still in Boston on his movie set, but he said he'd be here in a flash if you needed him."

"Where is Isabelle?" At this, again, Magnus looked uncomfortable. As if on cue, Alec heard the toilet flush in the bathroom across the room, and the door opened to reveal his disheveled sister (well, as disheveled as a supermodel could look). He cringed inwardly upon seeing her close up. She looked worse than Magnus; her face was deathly pale and tinged a little green. She had dark circles under her eyes and she walked very slowly. But, upon seeing that he was awake, she smiled thinly and rushed over, a little wobbly, to the bed. Had he really made her that afraid? It was just a little fracture.

"You're awake for good, now? No more false alarms?" she said as she leaned down to hug him gently.

"I guess not. What's the matter? Do you feel okay?" Alec asked. He was met with silence, and a veiled look exchanged between her and Magnus, fast as lightning before she turned her gaze back to him, her features back in place.

"I feel fine, Alec. How are _you?_" she asked, trying to subtly turn the subject; she wasn't very good at it, but he ignored it for now. He was just happy they were both here. Especially Magnus. He'd missed him so much- Oh. My. God.

"Magnus?" he began

"Yes, love?" At this, Alec jumped. They were in front of Isabelle! Even if she knew he was gay, she didn't know he was actually in a relationship! But apparently- "What? She knows," Magnus said, like it wasn't a big deal. "She does have that pesky woman's intuition thing going on."

"That I do. It comes in damn good handy sometimes, too," she quipped. Alec was a little startled by the fact that they got along so well all of a sudden. They hardly knew each other.

"Guys," he began again. "What reason did you give for Magnus being here?" He figured this was a valid question. He was sure the coach and maybe some of the players had been in an out, and what would they think of a random (well, he was random to them) guy hanging out by Alec's bed all day and night? What did they think was going on? He shuddered.

"Oh, simple. He's my boyfriend," Isabelle said without missing a beat. She looked bored; she had slumped down on the chaise across the room.

"It's true. She kissed me and grabbed my ass and everything," Magnus said. At Isabelle's look he added, "Well, you did! I think you were a little eager to prove things..." he chuckled. "Huh. I'm officially a bisexual polygamist. I need to update my resume."

How could they be so calm about this? He guessed it was okay, as long as everyone else believed they were together, and not he and Alec. Jesus, that would be a nightmare. How would be explain that to his coach? His teammates?

"How are you two so calm?" Alec said in a strained voice. He was met with a couple of nonchalant stares, followed by a pair of shrugs. He gave up. Plus, Isabelle had gotten up to go to bathroom again. "Is something the matter?" Alec asked after she had closed the door.

Magnus just waved his hand dismissively. "She's fine. Just stressed, I guess. But she's glad you're okay. For the record, I'm _elated_."

"Yeah, I guess I am too. I just want to know when I'll get to go back," he said. He was looking down, so he didn't see the look of despair that crossed Magnus' features before he looked back up. He saw the table in the corner. "When did that stuff get here?" he wondered.

"Oh, the tall, smooth talking ebony cutie brought the game ball," Magnus said. Alec figured he meant Donovan. "Despite completely sucking the entire game, you managed to kick the winning goal in the end."

"Well, I had a lot on my mind during the game," Alec replied, blushing and thinking about what he'd been preoccupied with most of the game.

"I _know_ it's a lot. And yet, somehow, you managed to fit it all in your mouth. That takes talent, babycakes."

Alec gasped in a panicked breath, growing as red as a Christmas bow. He was terrified that someone out in the hall heard what Magnus had just said, and he was sure he was about to faint. Good thing he was already laying down.

"Calm down, Alexander. No one's around, I promise. It's three in the morning," Magnus reassured him. "However, the doctor said he'd come by in a little while in case you were up. So we're expecting him in a couple of minutes anyway." At Alec's panicked look he added, "I'm positive that he doesn't suspect a thing," he said seriously, trying to quell Alec's fears. "Plus, I'm pretty sure he's convinced that Isabelle and I are nymphos, the way she hangs all over me when someone's around. You'd think they'd pick up on the fact that she's overcompensating, but doctors can be so stupid when it comes to real-world stuff." Magnus was rambling now. Alec was just glad they'd thought to keep his and Magnus' relationship under wraps in front of people. He was very close to Magnus (he couldn't bring himself to say it yet), but he still wasn't ready for the world to know he didn't like girls like- well, like Isabelle.

She came back out of the bathroom a few minutes later, just as the doctor was walking in.

"Well, hello Mr. Lightwood. Nice to see you a little more coherent," he joked. Okay. Alec had to admit: he was cute. A little. "I'm Doctor Cox," he offered. Alec did _not_ miss the irrepressible smirk on Magnus' face. When they locked eyes, Magnus wiggled his eyebrows and Alec blushed. Isabelle just rolled her eyes.

"Hi," he replied.

"So, have your sister and her boyfriend told you anything specific yet about your condition?" Dr. Cox asked him. He had to try not to giggle at Isabelle and "her boyfriend".

"Well, he said I fractured my tibia," Alec said.

"Yes, and hyperextended your Achilles' tendon. We had to medicate you pretty heavily to take down the pain level. Basically, your Achilles' tendon was stretched beyond capacity when you went down wrong. There are some slight tears, but it will heal in time, as will the fracture." This is what Alec wanted to talk about.

"About how long till I can play again?" Alec asked. Suddenly he felt very stereotypical. He bet Dr. Cox saw a lot of sports injuries, and he was probably bombarded with that question before he could even get a word out of his mouth. At least Alec had let him talk a little first, he thought.

"Well, that depends. It can take up to three months for your shin to heal, but the Achilles' is what worries me. It takes a lot to pull it the way you did. It could take quite a while to heal." Damnit, he wasn't getting to the point.

"So, will I be able to finish out the season?" Alec asked hopefully. That hope vanished when he saw the doctor's face fall.

"I don't think so," he said solemnly. "The particular injury caused to your tendon could potentially take six to eight months to heal. In this case, I don't think I can clear you to play for any of this season. I'm sorry, Alexander. Next season should be just fine, if that's any consolation." But it wasn't. He'd lose more than half the season. That was out of the question if he wanted to be assistant coach someday. He had people like Landon Donovan and Michael Carrick to compete with, and they were out there kicking ass, while he would be warming the bench.

"Are you sure? Is there any possibility?" he was grasping at straws here.

"There is, but it is so thin it's not even worth mentioning. Just give it some time, Alexander. Wait until next season, and you can come back with a vengeance. If you go out on your injury too early, you could damage your tendon for life. Then, not only will you not play soccer, you won't walk right for the rest of your life. This is serious, and I need you to understand that you must let it heal completely," the doctor said. Alec nodded solemnly. So this was it. The end of his career. Sure, he could play next season and the season after that, but it wouldn't make a difference. He was 23 years old and he was pretty much out. He tried not to let the crushing weight of despair suffocate him as the doctor wrote something on a clipboard and made his way out of the room. Alec didn't think he was cute anymore; not when he gave news like that.


	26. Chapter 26

"Fuck no."

"Oh come on, baby! I'm trying to help!"

"Fuck. NO."

"Keep dreaming. He'll never let you do it. You might as well give it up."

Alec crossed his arms and pouted his lips like a sullen teenager. He was definitely not letting Magnus carry him up the stairs honeymoon style, no matter if they were out of the line of sight of paparazzi, or Jace, and it was just the three of them. He didn't care. He was NOT a damsel in distress. No matter that he couldn't walk without crutches and he was currently facing two flights of stairs to his apartment. He took a deep breath and let it out slowly. He could do this.

As Magnus and Isabelle stood by looking completely unfaithful in him, he put his crutches on the first step and heaved himself up. It took a good 30 seconds, but he got up on the first step. Over the course of the next ten minutes, he made it up three more before Magnus got fed up with waiting and simply grabbed him and slung him over his shoulder fireman style while Isabelle grabbed his crutches and duffel and bounded up behind them with an annoying smirk on her face. Alec acted in the totally clichè way and pounded upside down on Magnus' back yelling to be let go.

"Jesus, you're heavy," Magnus said as they reached the last few steps. "Do we need to do some more strenuous exercise?" he chuckled.

"Muscle weighs more than fat," Isabelle offered, acting like she was coming to her brother's rescue. She was still smiling and it was annoying Alec to no end.

"No one asked you to play Superman!" Alec whined. This was ridiculous. He was a grown man and he was currently being carried like a child out of a burning building. He huffed loudly.

Finally, they made it into his apartment and Magnus deposited him gingerly onto the couch. He winced at the shift in position as it put a little pressure on his injured tendon, but he schooled his features before Magnus saw; he plastered the scowl back on his face as he looked up at his boyfriend. The boyfriend that had dropped everything a week ago and come across the entire country to be there for him. The boyfriend that was currently leaving behind a thriving business to sit around and play Nurse Betty. The boyfriend that was now looking at him like he was the world, and he would do anything to save him from being in pain. Alec sighed and wiped away the scowl.

"Sorry. I'm just not used to playing the victim, okay? You don't have to treat me like I'm breakable," he said softly.

"Right. You're already broken." At Alec's eye roll, he added, "Look, I know you're independent. But seriously, you heard Dr. Cox," and at this he smirked, as he always did when he said Alec's doctor's name (which Alec was suspicious that he said more often than he really needed to). "You need to cool it for a while. You don't want to ruin your leg just because you're a queen and you want to get back on the field. Would you rather play a few games, then fuck up everything forever? Or wait until you're healed and have a long, happy career after that?"

Alec huffed like a child again, but chose to keep his mouth shut because he knew Magnus was right. Isabelle continued flitting around, putting things in order (he wasn't really sure what that entailed, but he let her be). Magnus took a seat on the edge of the couch next to Alec's hip. He was looking at Magnus, but Magnus was looking at Isabelle with a look that Alec didn't recognize in the least. It was a little- admonishing? He didn't understand that. Isabelle was just trying to help. He didn't get overly suspicious, however, until Magnus jumped up and grabbed a large, overstuffed duffel from her hands and put it on the floor. She just looked at him with an annoyed expression (very Isabelle) and huffed over to Alec, plastering on a smile.

"So, you think you can handle him for the rest of the week?" She asked Alec, referring to Magnus. How they'd gotten to know each other so well and become so intuitive of each other in such a short time was beyond him. "He's a little overcareful if you ask me, but I guess that's a good thing. He'll take care of you for now, until you can get around on your crutches better," she said. He rolled his eyes.

"Izzy, seriously. One, I'm not a fucking child. Two, I can take care of myself. Three, I'm a fucking athlete! I've been on crutches more times than I can count and you know it. Would the two of you stop treating me like I'm an invalid? JESUS!" The two of them looked at him as if he just disproved his "I'm not a child" comment. Well, he supposed he had, but that only made him angrier and whinier.

"Just let me do it okay? That way, I have a reason to actually be here and not go rushing back to that God forsaken zoo you Californians call an airport," Magnus said with a flourish of his hand. Isabelle just snickered under her breath.

"Yes, well, it looks like I'm done here then. Take care, you two, and easy on the physical activity," she said with a smirk. Alec felt his face turn red and Magnus made a pouty face.

"Be careful, kay Izzy? Call me when you get home." Alec, always the overprotective older brother.

"Yeah, yeah. Jace'll be in Malibu for a Vanity Fair shoot in like two weeks. You'll have another sibling to bother with then," she said with a smile. Then she pissed him off more by kissing his head like their mother used to do, and she was off. It seemed kind of abrupt, but then again, Alec had been doped up on pain meds the whole time he was in the hospital, so the previous week had passed with intermittent consciousness. He supposed Magnus and Izzy had had a lot of time to get to know each other after all. But that still didn't explain the random looks they gave each other, especially from Magnus' end. But honestly, he was way too tired to even ask about it. He dozed on the couch, and when Magnus covered him up with the afghan from his bedroom, he was out cold.

**Song for this section: When Love Takes Over by David Guetta feat. Kelly Rowland (Love this song and it's a good literal metaphor. Magnus is singing about exactly what Alec is thinking at the moment. *pause for deep existential moment* Magnus loves it too. It's sooo his style.)**

He woke up groggily some time later to the soft feel of emerald polished nails gently raking over his scalp, and the voice he was becoming very accustomed to.

"When love takes over, yeah. You know you can't deny," Magnus sang to himself. Alec opened his eyes and looked up. Magnus had his head leaned back against the back of the couch, singing softly to the ceiling. Alec's head was in his lap, getting caressed by his long fingers. He almost drifted back into sleep, but the lure of that voice kept him peeling his eyes back open. He sometimes thought he heard it, when he was here by himself and Magnus was back in New York. It was like it was imprinted on the back of his mind. Gorgeous and haunting, the first song Magnus ever sang for him. It was hard for him to believe that he'd kept that voice prisoner for so long after his mother had died. Granted, he was still a long way from letting it out in the open, but it was enough for now to know that he trusted Alec enough to let him into that part of his life. The two of them had opened up to each other in a matter of weeks, spilling their deepest secrets. It seemed kind of fast, but then again, to Alec it seemed natural as it happened. He'd never thought he'd let someone in like that.

"Give me a reason. I gotta know, do you feel it too? Can't you see me here on overload? And this time I blame you," Magnus went on, softy to himself. He would half hum some parts, and sing words on others. It was so beautiful, Alec sat there and listened to the entire song. He was a little sad when he noticed it was over and Magnus wasn't going to start it over. He reached up and ran his finger down his boyfriend's chest, causing him to lift his head and look down at Alec. He smiled the most brilliant, drowsy smile Alec had ever seen, and Alec smiled groggily back.

"Sleep good?" Magnus asked, running his fingers through Alec's hair again while Alec ran his knuckles back and forth against Magnus' chest.

"Mmhm," he answered, feeling Magnus' heartbeat through his thin American Apparel t-shirt. Just then, his stomach spoke up with its rage at being so neglected lately. Hospital food just didn't cut it. "And apparently I'm hungry," Alec said, blushing a little.

Magnus slowly eased himself out from under Alec's head, trying not to make him move a lot because, well, it hurt like hell. Not only did his leg and ankle scream in pain with every movement, but his body was still sore from the out of the ordinary beating he took at his last game.

His last game. Those words hit him hard, even though he only thought them. He knew rationally that he would play next season, but right now it seemed inconsequential. He was so deep in the belief that his career was over and he'd never get past the rank of peon. Magnus must have noticed the look on his face and misinterpreted it.

"You need another vicodin? I tried not to move you too much," he said with concern.

"Nah. I'm okay," Alec said, still thinking about his abrupt pull from the soccer profession.

"Okay," Magnus answered with a look that clearly said he hadn't misinterpreted. But it also said that he cared for Alec enough that he wouldn't press the issue at the moment. Alec thought about how much care that was. They had almost said those three words to each other once, but neither had actually spoken them aloud. However, Alec had been getting the distinct impression that he was falling hopelessly in love with this sparkly, singing club owner. He'd never actually been in love before. He thought he felt something for Jace all these years, but he always knew it was wrong. It didn't feel right to him, ever. He thought it might have been the fact that it was because Jace was a guy, or that he was his cousin by blood, but that wasn't really it. It was because it wasn't true. The way he felt with Magnus, the way he immediately relaxed when they were alone together, told him something different. Everything with Magnus felt completely _right_, like he was exactly where he was supposed to be. The only thing that fucked it up was the fact that he could never, EVER, be with him in public. That would be death to his career and his camaraderie with the team for sure.

About that time Magnus came back with a menu for the Chinese restaurant six blocks away from Alec's apartment. They knew this address (and his usual order) by heart. Alec smiled up at his boyfriend. Sometimes it was weird how he knew exactly what Alec would want without having to exchange any words.

"I take it you want the noodles?" he asked, waving the menu with Alec's usual circled about ten times. Okay, so maybe he was just observant rather than omniscient. Alec still thought it was uncanny sometimes.

"Yeah," Alec said with a smile. Magnus just looked at him for a moment, raised an eyebrow, and whipped out his cell phone. Alec held up a hand and pointed to his own cell phone (which had the number programmed at the top of his contact list). Magnus rolled his eyes and picked it up. While he made the order, Alec spent the time unabashedly staring at the beautiful man in front of him. He tried to pick a favorite part: his fine-boned nose, his perfectly shaped eyes, their ethereal color, the fact that he wore clear lipgloss _everywhere_, but it never seemed to smear. He couldn't possibly pick one thing. It was the whole package that he loved, along with the fact that Magnus was so intuitive and tuned in to him. They were in sync with each other on a level that Alec had never experienced with anyone else.

"They didn't ask for the address," Magnus said as he dropped Alec's phone back on the coffee table. "That disturbs me, Alec." But he was smirking, cutting his eyes sideways at Alec and showing one dimple.

"Well, they know the number. And they know the order. They were probably surprised when you ordered fried rice though. I've never ordered that. "

"Yes, they asked me if I was sure," Magnus replied. Once again, that eyebrow caused Alec's groin to twitch. Magnus caught it. "Easy there, tiger. You're still a little incapacitated. I don't think we need to let the pitbull," at this he leaned down and squeezed Alec lightly through his pants, "out of the cage just yet." At this, Alec blushed furiously, which only made Magnus cock his brow again, which only made the situation worse for Alec. It was a vicious cycle. A ridiculous, vicious, sexy cycle.

"Okay," Magnus went on. "Enough with that. We've gotta figure out how to sit you up to eat without having to amputate."

Alec took a deep breath and braced himself as Magnus put his hands under his arms and lifted. Alec bit his lip through the onslaught of pain through his leg, so much that he tasted blood. But he didn't utter a sound. He should have known, though, that Magnus would give him a look so full of love and concern when he caught Alec's face again, even with no sound emitted. When Alec was fully sitting up, his injured leg stretched out in front of him in its enormous plastic immobilizing cast, Magnus sat down next to him. He reached up with a nimble finger and lifted Alec's chin gently. He leaned in slow, letting Alec have some time to protest. Alec wasn't sure how on earth Magnus would think he would want to protest. Slowly, Magnus extended his tongue and used the tip to lap up the trickle of blood on Alec's lip while Alec sighed in pleasure, his eyes slipping shut. Magnus then pressed his lips full on Alec's and hummed against them, creating a pleasant vibration. Alec's hand slipped up Magnus' chest and around the back of his neck to twine in his loose hair. He pulled him closer, pressing in harder. Magnus' hand had crept down to Alec's upper arm and was squeezing gently, also pulling as if they could literally melt into each other. Alec let out a moan against the soft lips working on his. He hadn't really known how much he'd missed kissing Magnus for the last couple of weeks. Kissing Magnus had the effect of morphine and caffeine mixed together, it made his heart race and his body heavy all at the same time. He felt like he was flying and falling, running full speed and trying to stand still and catch his breath. It was a high that he'd never experienced before Magnus came into his life. This man lit him on fire and gave him chills.

Outside, Jimmy the delivery man knocked five times before either one of them noticed. Finally, Magnus pulled away and Alec almost whined. "Was that the door?" he asked, sounding a little breathless against Alec's lips. Both their eyes were still closed.

"I think so," Alec said reluctantly. His stomach must have smelled the food, since it started protesting again, which finally pulled them apart.

Magnus got up and answered the door, and Jimmy looked at him extremely funny until Alec just yelled "It's okay, Jimmy!" from the living room, leaning over so the delivery guy could see him from the door. Jimmy just laughed and smiled, waving at him. When Magnus made his way back to the couch, he set the food on the coffee table and went to the kitchen to hunt up utensils.

He sat down next to Alec and handed him a fork as Alec opened up his container of noodles that smelled _amazing_. He dug in immediately, and slurped up the noodles that hung out of his mouth. Magnus just stared at him, amused. "What?"

"I just have the incredible urge to Lady and the Tramp you right now."

"Is that some sort of sex reference I don't know about?" Alec asked, looking scared.

Magnus laughed out loud then, when he noticed that Alec wasn't joking, he grew serious. "You know, Lady and the Tramp? The Disney movie with the dogs? And they go to the restaurant and eat spaghetti and they get the same noodle and slurp it up and they end up doggie kissing?" He was so enthusiastic that Alec had to laugh.

"Um..no?" Alec offered.

"Jeez! We are going to have to have a Disney marathon one of these days. I need to school you on the finer points of overly sweet, completely unrealistic, animated love stories between fictional characters. We need to get started soon. I can't wait to watch my favorite with you."

"What's your favorite?" Alec asked, amused.

"Sleeping Beauty, of course," Magnus said, as if it should be obvious. "We'll start tomorrow!" Alec half expected him to get out a calendar and pencil it in as a date. Which reminded him-

"How long are you staying?" he asked Magnus.


	27. Chapter 27

Magnus was only staying three days. Alec was more than a little bummed about that, but he tried to focus on the positives of his leaving so soon: Jace was coming at the end of the week and well, Alec still wasn't too keen on him knowing about their relationship just yet. As a matter of fact, he wished he could just keep his whole sexuality situation from Jace for the rest of time. He had no idea how his brother would react, but he knew it probably wouldn't be good. Jace could be lumped in with Alec's teammates on that one.

Also, there really wasn't much that they could do other than sit on the couch and watch TV in his current condition, and when Magnus was around Alec wanted to do A LOT more than sit around. He had to continuously fight down a semi-erection every time he caught Magnus' eyes. Sitting across from each other on the couch, Alec would look over every now and then to find Magnus' exotic eyes focused on some part of his body: his chest, his eyes, his arms, his crotch. And it only made Alec want to pounce on him more. But he couldn't, because he was basically out of commission at the moment.

As they sat there watching some show about housewives, Magnus suddenly moved closer to Alec, shifting on the couch so that he was right up in his face and only had to whisper in his ridiculously sexy sex voice.

"Hey, lover? I was just thinking- " he paused.

"Yes?" Alec croaked, feeling the effects of the proximity already, and being internally pissed that he couldn't do anything about it.

"You need something," Magnus said.

"And what, exactly, do I need? Besides a new leg?" Alec said stubbornly.

"Oh, now. Don't go getting all emo on me. I like your condition for the moment," he said with a smirk.

"How could me being completely incapacitated _possibly_ benefit you?" Alec wondered.

"It gives me the chance to dominate, for one," Magnus replied with a very scary look on his face. Was he talking about- ? Oh, God, no. Alec hadn't even thought about that. He really hadn't considered that Magnus might want to switch roles someday. The thought made him nauseously afraid. He never understood how Magnus withstood the pain Alec knew he was in every time they had sex, at least for the first few minutes. But he also remembered Magnus telling him it had been a while since he'd been on the receiving end of intercourse. Alec should have known this would come up eventually. Still, he tried his best to stall this conversation for a time when he was fully recovered.

"Ah, Magnus? I don't think that would be- possible at the moment anyway. I mean, I know I wouldn't have to do much, but I mean, I don't know how I could get comfortable, you know, with my cast and- " he trailed off because Magnus was looking at him with an expression of love and concern mixed with amusement.

"Baby boy, relax! I'm not planning on jumping your bones. Although, I am planning on taking advantage of your situation; however, I'm not so sure it won't benefit us both, you being unable to fight back, I mean." Alec just stared at him, still afraid of what he was getting at. "Which brings me back to my initial statement: You need something."

"Alright, I'm curious. What is it that I need?"

"A spongebath," Magnus said matter-of-factly.

Alec just stared some more, not believing what he just heard. He couldn't help snickering at the thought. He also couldn't help picturing Magnus in a nurse Betty outfit, pouring soapy water all over him and getting himself wet in the process, the tight white fabric suctioning to his long lean body and outlining every hard line-. Alec shook his head and snapped out of the visual. "Are you serious?" he asked incredulously.

"When have I ever not been?" Alec took a breath and opened his mouth. "Don't answer that," Magnus said, cutting him off. "But seriously, you need some sort of bath. And what better way? I mean, it's not like you can actually hop in the shower with me-"

"You're just looking for an excuse to rub your hands all over me."

"Naked. I want to rub my hands all over you _naked_. But yes, you caught me," Magnus replied, not looking the slightest bit guilty. "Please?"

"I don't need a bath. I'm fine."

"Fine, then. What about a massage?"

"Magnus-"

"You're really going to turn down a massage? I mean, isn't that what you sports boys _do_? Get injured so you can get massages from hot girl trainers and such? Though, in your case, that wouldn't be that appealing I guess. But then again, that's why you have me," he said with a flourish. Alec just rolled his eyes. But then, Magnus pulled the wild card. "Trust me, if you don't like what I do, you can smack me...anywhere you choose," he said. Then, the icing on the seductive cake: he lowered his head and cocked that left eyebrow. And that was it; Alec melted and hardened all at the same time.

Twenty minutes later, he was sprawled on his stomach on his small bed, stripped down to his boxers. Honestly, he didn't feel very sexy at all with his huge immobilizing cast, but he guessed that didn't matter much. He tried to relax and look forward to a nice, deep back massage. He supposed he really could use one since he'd been pretty tense even before the injury. He chose to sit back and let his body enjoy it.

He watched as Magnus flitted about the room, pulling apart his suitcase and throwing things out around him, looking for something. When he finally laid his hands on it, he pulled it out and Alec was a little puzzled. It looked like a tube of toothpaste, cherry flavored as the front said. Alec wondered why Magnus was going to brush his teeth before he gave him massage.

"I picked this up while you were passed out in the hospital. I've been _dying_ to try it! Isabelle said you probably wouldn't like it, but then again, it's not really for _you_."

"You and Isabelle talked a lot at the hospital, didn't you?" Alec asked.

"Well, you sure as hell weren't talking to us. Not all buzzed on morphine, at least. But the things you did say, well, let's just say we weren't all that- un-entertained," he said with a smile. Alec's face heated to a bright red, and he rolled his head so his face was buried in the pillows. "Oh, see? You're getting used to the position already," Magnus offered. This only made Alec gasp and blush more.

"Just get on with it, already. And what is that stuff anyway?"

"Cherry flavored lube," Magnus said nonchalantly.

Alec's face shot out of the comfort of the pillows to glare incredulously. "Just _what_ do you plan on doing with it?"

"Would you like me to read the label and list its possible uses? I didn't think so. Honestly, I'm just using it as massage oil, of sorts." Alec was definitely interested in the "of sorts" part, but he kept his mouth shut, opting to shut up and trust his boyfriend. "Plus, like I said: if I do anything you don't like, I'll let you punish me. But I can promise you," and here he leaned in close to Alec's ear, "you will be screaming for joy when I'm done with you. And then, you'll be begging to be had." Alec shivered at his words. "Now. What's your favorite song in the whole world?"

"Why?"

"Humor me."

"Voodoo Child. Hendrix."

"Nice choice, baby blue." He walked over to Alec's stereo and looked inside, probably finding out that Alec wasn't lying about his favorite song; it was already set on repeat. Magnus pressed play and Alec waited for the seductive first few bars to come out of the speakers. He thought about his choice, and then about Magnus' personality. He always had something up his sleeve, and this time was no different, he was sure of it.

"Ever heard of a happy ending?" Magnus asked. "Well, I'm starting early, pretty boy."

And as the music started out its intoxicating riffs, Magnus reached down and whisked his own t-shirt off in one smooth movement. Alec was bombarded with the expanse of smooth, tanned skin revealed. He couldn't help licking his lips in anticipation, even though he couldn't move. Then, Magnus turned around and wove his hips to the beat, playing with the button on his jeans and waving his ass in Alec's face, which was now completely flushed, but not from embarrassment. He couldn't believe his boyfriend was giving him a striptease at the moment. Wasn't he supposed to be getting a massage? Not that he was complaining, but it was kind of making it harder to not pounce on him.

Facing away from Alec, Magnus slowly peeled his jeans off and let them fall to the floor. He was, of course, wearing nothing underneath, so Alec was hit full on with the deliciousness of the most perfect ass he'd ever laid eyes on. The ass that belonged to him. The ass that was currently weaving around about 4 feet from his face at the moment. Alec was very glad he was laying on top of his erection, or he would have felt a little pathetic.

Magnus picked up the cherry covered tube and sashayed over to the side of the bed. He climbed on top and straddled Alec's hips, rubbing against the crack of his ass with the sweetest friction, causing Alec to shiver up and down his spine. He felt Magnus lean over close to his face.

"Just sit back and enjoy, lover," he whispered low.

Then, Alec felt a warm liquid oozing onto the middle of his back, and he could smell the cherry. He heard the tube hit the bed beside him, then he felt Magnus' hands slide across his back and up to his shoulder blades, spreading the sweet smelling substance across the expanse of skin. He continued to gyrate his crotch into Alec's ass through his boxers, and it was almost enough to make Alec scream. But then, Magnus amped it up a notch.

Alec felt the unmistakable soft, strong muscle that was Magnus' tongue glide all the way up his spine, from the top of his boxers to the back of his neck. This caused a shiver like none he'd experienced before. He heard Magnus chuckle before he did it again, but slower this time. He smacked his lips in Alec's ear. He continued to rub firm circles on Alec's back, loosening up his muscles while every now and then repeating the lick from bottom to top. Occasionally he added a lick across Alec's lower back, from hip to hip. It was excruciating not to be able to roll over and pin Magnus to the bed and have his way with him. But Alec couldn't do that. And he knew Magnus was loving every minute of it.

"You want more, pretty boy?" Magnus taunted as he thrust his hips, causing Alec to thrust his into the mattress and moan low in his chest, the pillows making it come out a little muffled. "I'll take that as a yes. Just remember, I won't do anything I don't think you'll like." This made Alec a little nervous, but he was too blissed out to give it much thought. Magnus reached down and slid his boxers off and over his cast, throwing them to the side. Alec felt the rush of cool air to his backside, but still didn't really object because honestly, the massage had loosened him up and he was pretty damn relaxed, which was a new thing for him.

When he felt Magnus return to his position straddling his hips, he thought he might start visibly shaking. Magnus' entire length settled into the crack of his ass, caressing him gently. It caused such a contradiction of feeling that Alec didn't know what to think. It felt intimate and exhilarating, to be in the submissive position and to trust Magnus that much. But it was also the single most terrifying moment of his life, because he was afraid of what on earth Magnus would do next. He'd never been in this situation, and he was very self-conscious. Apparently, Magnus noticed.

"Okay, seriously baby. Loosen up. I won't bite if you don't want me to." He chuckled a little. "I promise, whatever I do will feel good. That's all I'm trying to do, make you feel good." The soothing sound of his voice and the anticipation made Alec relax into the moment a little bit. He took a deep breath and let it out, showing Magnus that he trusted him. Plus, he kind of wanted that tongue on his back again, and he got just that.

Magnus started at the top this time, taking his slow, sweet time working all the way down to Alec's tailbone. His hands followed, rubbing circles on the muscles surrounding Alec's spine, loosening them up. Magnus was very good at massages, Alec confirmed to himself. His hands were feeling so good, Alec almost didn't notice when Magnus moved to position himself lower, now sitting on the backs of Alec's thighs. But then his hands were lower, too, running over the swell of Alec's ass. He gripped a little tighter, like he did when they made love, and he was trying to pull Alec in deeper. The memory made Alec moan out loud.

"I haven't even done anything yet," Magnus said with a smirk.

"Sorry," Alec sighed, still in a pleasure induced haze.

"Don't be." When Magnus spoke, Alec could feel his hot breath on top of his tailbone and it was excruciating. Alec didn't know what he would do next. He certainly was not prepared.

It seemed to happen all at once, but also in slow motion. He felt Magnus' hands pull apart, and the hot breath move lower. Then, he felt that glorious tongue in a place he'd never imagined it going before. Then, his mind registered that this was extremely uncomfortable, self-conscious-wise. He started to jerk up and yell at Magnus to stop. But then, before the words came out of his mouth and before he even had a chance to move at all, his body did an involuntary spasm. He saw sparks behind his eyelids- or maybe it was sparks in the top of his head since his eyes had rolled so far back they were almost looking behind him. He felt Magnus' fingers dig deeper into his flesh, and he felt the tongue slide over his entrance once more. He screamed. Very loud.

"Jesus, baby. You like that?" Magnus asked. Alec was safely beyond all comprehensible speech at the moment. He was too busy shaking and crying for more to answer the question coherently. "You haven't seen anything yet, sweetness." He lifted his head and looked back to see Magnus grinning a sinister grin, then he lowered back down and Alec tried to brace himself for what was next.

Then, he felt it. Magnus ran over his entrance up and down one more time, then shoved his tongue in. Alec was sure he'd died. It was too much. Just- too much. He was sure he couldn't take any more. That was when Magnus curled his tongue upward and pulled out, only to shove it back in again. Then, he reached down and slid his hand underneath Alec to cup him, and squeezed. It took about 4.2 seconds before Alec started shaking and screaming again. Over and over, Magnus plunged his cherry-coated tongue in, sometimes moaning and causing vibrations to shoot through the sensitive bundle of nerves.

After a few more minutes of this excruciatingly pleasurable torture, Magnus removed his tongue and leaned up, keeping his left hand on Alec's cock and gently pumping up and down as much as he could in their current position. Then, Alec felt a long, thin finger enter him. Magnus had done this once before, when he'd blown him at Cherry Bomb, but this was different. His ass felt so much more sensitive after what Magnus had just done that just one finger felt more like three. But it was amazing, and it felt like heaven.

"More?" Magnus asked, and Alec felt the breath against his right ass cheek. Every now and then, Magnus would bite gently on the mound of flesh. All Alec could do was nod furiously. Magnus slid a second finger inside, and Alec moaned low and loud. His face was sweaty and his voice was getting hoarse. Magnus slid in and out at a painfully slow rhythm, and Alec was dying for more. With what strength he had left, he pushed back onto Magnus' fingers, using his good leg to lift his ass off the bed inch by inch. Magnus took the hint and pushed in deeper, finally hitting where Alec needed him most. It was like pure, unadulterated euphoria. Three strokes of Magnus' nimble fingers against his most sensitive spot, and Alec felt the familiar explosion. Within milliseconds, the bed beneath him was soaked with cum, and he was collapsing back down on top of it. He was completely and utterly exhausted from the pleasure that just racked his entire body. He wasn't sure he'd ever have an orgasm like that again.

When Magnus removed his fingers and stood up to get off of Alec's legs, he smiled as he looked down at his boyfriend lying on the bed. "So, do you still want to spank me?" he asked. Alec just rolled his eyes in the back of his head again, and sighed. It was all just too much. He opened his eyes again to see Magnus pulling on his arm trying to get him to roll over.

"You really want me to get up now?" Alec asked, incredulous.

Magnus smirked and said, "Well, now I have an excuse to give you a spongebath because baby, you're dirtier than I thought." He winked and yanked harder, and Alec finally gave in.


	28. Chapter 28

He'd already lived through a day like this once, so why was this so much harder? He knew Magnus had obligations on the other side of the country and that he couldn't just leave Camille hanging by herself indefinitely. Plus, Jace was coming tomorrow and it would be infinitely better that Magnus not be around when he got here. It would be just way too much to explain. Magnus had told him about kicking Jace out of Cherry Bomb, and Alec was pretty sure they didn't need to see each other so soon, let alone at his own apartment where Jace would definitely question the club owner's presence. All these reasons and still others were rushing through his mind for Magnus to go, but he almost couldn't bear the thought of not seeing him again for a very long time.

He supposed that when he was able to get around better, he could fly back to New York, but what good would that do? He still really couldn't go out and have fun with him. What would they do? He was sure Magnus didn't want to sit around all day and take care of him. And a lot of visits to the Lightwood mansion were bound to attract a few unwanted cameras to Magnus, more than he already had following him in New York. Alec was thankful that his boyfriend's celebrity had been pretty much concentrated on the NYC fashion/clubbing scene. LA was pleasantly in the dark about Magnus Bane, to an extent. He got his occasional picture on Fashion Police for his immaculate outfits at premieres and such, but he could at least walk around largely undetected on the west coast. No, Alec couldn't be openly _with_ him in New York. That was out of the question. So, he'd been trying to build himself up to being without Magnus for the past three days. The bad part about this was that the past three days had gone by much too fast for him to accomplish getting used to the idea.

He watched from the couch as Magnus gathered his things and stacked them in front of the door, ready to be whisked into a waiting taxi when he made it out of the lobby. For only being in LA for about two weeks, Magnus had a lot of stuff. But he supposed Magnus was rather like a girl when it came to that kind of thing, and he didn't mind in the least. It was one of the things he liked about his boyfriend: that he always wanted to look his best, no matter the situation. The worst he'd ever seen Magnus look was when he woke up in the hospital, and Magnus had told him that basically he hadn't given a damn about himself at that particular point in time, and he said with good reason. Alec just felt guilty, even though he was the one who was laid up in a hospital bed. It seemed a crime to rob Magnus Bane of his favorite pastime: making himself beautiful. Alec told him countless times that he was beautiful on his own, and Magnus thanked him, but he said there was no fun in waking up and looking the same every day. He preferred to exude a different shade of confidence every day of the week, and it suited him.

As the last of his things was piled against the door, Magnus came over to sit with Alec on the couch. Like a child, Alec leaned over and put his head on Magnus' shoulder, causing Magnus to lean back and move Alec's head to his chest. Magnus lay against the arm of the couch, running his fingers through Alec's hair for the last time. Everything seemed so final. It felt like they were never going to see each other again, even though Alec knew that wasn't really true. But he still hadn't thought of a viable way to see Magnus.

"I already miss you," Magnus said, echoing his own thoughts.

"I know. Me too. When are you going to be able to come back?" Alec asked, sounding hopeful.

"I don't know," Magnus said, sounding more depressed than Alec had ever heard him. "I already left Camille high and dry for almost two weeks. She's going to be slightly pissed when I get back, so I feel like I need to stick around for a good while and make sure things get back on track."

"This sucks royally," Alec said. His heart felt like it was being stretched to its limits. He felt a piece ripping off, for Magnus to take back to New York. He started to think about their relationship so far, and how it seemed completely like a dream. They seemed to exist in their own little bubble, and once that bubble was burst, it was like a tidal wave of loss. He'd felt it when he'd left New York to come back to LA, and that was devastating, but at least he'd had soccer to think about and to keep him occupied. What was he supposed to do now? He had to lay on the couch all day and watch shows he didn't care about and think about beautiful green-yellow eyes and soft lips that he couldn't kiss. He didn't think he'd ever be okay again. Magnus had become his whole life in the matter of a month and a half. It didn't even feel pathetic anymore. It just felt right. And Magnus leaving felt completely and utterly wrong.

"I know, baby, I know," Magnus cooed like he was Alec's mother, and Alec could hear a little hitch in his voice. He even kissed the top of Alec's head, and Alec didn't even mind. He felt protected and safe. Like the world couldn't touch them here. He wished he could kidnap Magnus and keep him here forever, but he knew that was out of the question. Magnus began to run his fingernails gently back and forth on Alec's upper arm, causing goosebumps to appear. Alec sighed and just let the tear fall that he'd been holding back.

Too soon, the time came for Magnus to leave so he had enough time to get to LAX and onto his flight. Alec secretly hoped he'd stay another day, but again the Jace thing got in the way. Magnus moved to get up, lifting Alec into a sitting position gingerly, so as to not cause his still tender leg any unnecessary pain. Alec had been practicing with his crutches the past couple of days, preparing for having fend for himself until Jace came around (and quite possibly while Jace was here, too). He could get around pretty well; well enough to fix his own meals for a day, anyway. Magnus strolled over to his suitcases, gathering them into each hand while Alec hobbled, crutchless, the five feet to the door. He got to see Magnus smile his disarming smile as he hopped about, and he was grateful. He leaned against the doorframe and looked at the most beautiful man on the earth, trying to memorize his face.

"I'll miss you so fucking much," Magnus said softly, also finally letting a tear fall unchecked down his cheek. Alec reached up with his free hand and swiped it away.

"Me too. But I'll see you soon. I promise I'll find a way," Alec said with conviction.

"Goodbye, baby," Magnus said after a few minutes of staring into each other's eyes. This was so damned hard.

"Bye," Alec returned, resting his forehead against Magnus' for a few seconds before unlocking and opening the door, moving aside so Magnus could pass. Magnus took a deep breath, and turned out the door, rolling his two oversized suitcases with him. He was only about two steps out the door before Alec stopped him. "Magnus?" he said, a little nervous.

Magnus stopped and half-turned back to him. "Yes?" Alec looked up and down the hallway that his apartment shared with about six other doors. It seemed clear enough.

"I love you," he said with conviction. It felt good to say it out loud. He reached for Magnus, and Magnus let go of his suitcases and stepped into him.

"I love you too, Alec," Magnus choked out. Alec glanced around one more time, and then pressed his lips to Magnus'. It was the most strained kiss the two of them had ever shared, with their heartbreak and yearning causing their emotions to be stretched taut and thin, but it was also the most heartfelt. Alec didn't really give a damn that he was in the hallway of his apartment building and that anyone on earth could walk through there at the moment. He didn't care that Jace would be here tomorrow. He didn't care about his aching leg. All he cared about was the next time he would get to kiss these lips, because that was the day his life would start again. Between now and then, his life would be on pause, because there really was nothing else but Magnus now. He had nothing else to look forward to. But somehow, that was okay. He already anticipated their next meeting because it would be their sweetest and most rewarding yet.

They were completely connected, right there in the hallway. The two of them had shut the world out for that full minute that their lips were pressed together, the last time for what they assumed would be a very long time. They were so engrossed in each other, they didn't even hear the rhythmic succession of clicks coming from down the hall. When Magnus turned again to leave, Alec smiled through the tears and knew that his whole life was contained in those retreating eyes.


	29. Chapter 29

Somehow the Midwest seemed grayer the second time around. Passing over it en route to California, Magnus had thought it was the largest expanse of farmland and nothingness he'd ever seen. Of course, he was seeing it from some ridiculous height, and the details were left blurred, but this time it seemed so much moreâ€¦nothing. He contributed his change in perspective to his heart's desolate attitude at the moment. He'd just had the best few days he'd had in a long ass time, and now they were over. He was a moping piece of shit, and he wasn't afraid who noticed. The guy next to him in the aisle had given up on staring at the mascara stains sliding down this grown man's face. He was left to his own morbid, depressed thoughts. He wondered if he'd survive leaving Alec this time.

The first time, they'd had a lot of phenomenal moments, yes, but there was still a little something lacking. They weren't in a true relationship, they hadn't solidified anything yet. Things like that. But now they'd said those three words that kick-started their relationship into full blown status. Hearing, seeing, feeling those words come from Alec's lips was like a having an atomic bomb go off in Magnus' heart. He was quite literally lit on fire. After their lips had parted, he was sure he would drop dead, and he would die a happy man. His life was complete. He'd never loved anyone in his whole life like he loved Alexander Lightwood. Truth be told, it scared the everloving shit out him, but he welcomed it with open arms. It seemed, after all these years of mindless dating and meaningless drifting, he'd finally found his missing piece. Alec was that one resonant note, that clear and vibrant middle C that grounded the key of Magnus' life. Without Alec, Magnus realized he'd been only one half of a whole.

As he watched Iowa disappear underneath and behind him, Magnus began to ponder what in the world this meant for them. He couldn't just up and leave New York and the lounge. What would happen to it? He supposed Camille could take care of it, but for how long? He couldn't just say "indefinitely". She'd be pissed beyond belief. But he couldn't not be with Alec. It hurt his chest just to think about not seeing him again, only talking on the phone or skyping or something. It just wasn't enough, not by a long shot.

Magnus spent most of the flight trying to contemplate excuses to go to California again, but none that he could come up with were quite viable enough, not without leaving some other aspect of his life wanting. Magnus, being the type that subconsciously strove to please everyone, couldn't let himself agree to any of his ideas. So, when he touched down at La Guardia, he was 9 hours more discouraged than he was when he left LAX. He hailed a cab and waited while the driver shoved his massive pile of belongings into the trunk. They set off toward Brooklyn, Magnus' pouty frown firmly in place. The rain pounded on the window, and it didn't make music like it does in the movies.

As they pulled up in front of his house, he caught a glimpse of Camille's white Range Rover parallel parked about half a block down. She was going to be pissed that he didn't call her to pick him up. She was probably up there now, making a fuss of how messy his room was (he'd packed in quite a haste, even for him). The thought didn't comfort him like it should have. He knew he should be glad to be home, to be able to hang and shoot the shit with his best friend in the entire world, but he just couldn't lift the hopelessness that had settled over him like the clouds overhead. He stepped out of the cab, his shiny Diesel boots getting submerged in the rainwater running towards the gutters. He kind of preferred the setting; it fit his mood.

"So nice of you to call, dearest," Camille called from the kitchen when he stepped out of the elevator, not looking up from her pot of boiling fettuccine. He could already smell the parmesan cream sauce that she was so incredible at making. Even that didn't bring the slightest smile to his face. He wanted to be a sullen teenager; incidentally, he never was a sullen teenager when he was an _actual_ teenager. He'd always been his vibrant, fun-loving self. This whole attitude shift was new to him, and it sucked. He plopped down on the couch, leaving his suitcases falling over by the elevator, and heaved a huge sigh of pity.

Upon hearing him in the living room, Camille ventured out and walked over to take a seat beside him. He wasn't facing her; he was too busy staring at the piano in the corner, reliving one of the most incredible memories he'd ever had. "Magnus?" she said quietly, now realizing he might be worse off than she thought. "Magnus, I've never really known you to be the mopey type. What gives?"

He turned to look at her, but didn't catch her gasp at his appearance. He guessed he was past noticing what others noticed about him. As it was, she saw his face, with its black mascara rivers running down to the corners of his mouth, glitter littering their pathways. His hair was falling limp around his face, and he was wearing yesterday's t-shirt and jeans. He guessed he understood why she would be concerned. "My God, Magnus. Are you okay?" she asked, not really expecting an answer, and he didn't really give her one. He just leaned down and laid his head on her chest, and let the silent tears take over. The food was forgotten, as was the luggage and mess around the apartment. She just held him, wishing she was still enough.

"He said it first," he said quietly.

"Said what?" she asked, afraid he was going to tell her they'd broken up or something.

"He told me he loved me. Out in the hallway. And then he kissed me, in the hallway, where anyone could walk by."

She was quiet for a moment. So this was what made him so unhappy; he'd finally found someone he loved that loved him back and had said so, despite his own apprehension about a relationship. And she understood the significance of Alexander Lightwood kissing Magnus in a semi-public place. He'd acknowledged their relationship in a tangible way. It may not have been in the middle of Times Square, but it was a step. And Magnus had to leave that to come back here and take care of business. She knew he would be mopey for the next few days just because he'd left behind his boyfriend on the other side of the country, but she was starting to expect a lot more piteous appearances from her best friend, considering how far the two had come in their relationship before Magnus left LA. She vowed internally to be there for her friend, no matter how ridiculous it got because he was all she had, and he was the world to her.

**Song for this section: Crash by Cavo (Song is so great from him to her. Could so imagine the Boys in the Band singin' this one.)**

She lay in her bed back in New York, still exhausted from her long flight back from LA, which was three days ago now. This was just another black mark against her, adding to the misery of her situation. She was completely miserable the whole time she was visiting her brother and she turned out not to be any help at all, because she spent most of her time puking her guts up. She thanked her lucky stars that Magnus was so infatuated with her brother that he'd hopped a plane as soon as he'd seen Alec's situation on television. She was so thankful that Alec had someone, finally. She had originally decided, in her car on the way to the hospital from the stadium, that she would stay until he got better. Her shoots be damned, she'd take care of her big brother. But she'd been lying to herself. She had to admit that while she was watching the game, she'd been feeling nauseous. She told herself that it was probably something she ate, but she knew it felt different; she just didn't know what kind of different it felt like. It wasn't until Magnus opened his big mouth that it put the thought in her head that had now bugged her to no end for nearly two weeks. She wasn't late yet, though, so she was still holding out hope that she'd just caught some type of virus. A virus that made her eat constantly, get the distinct craving for egg rolls at precisely 2:30 every morning, and throw them up promptly three hours later. She sighed to herself, rolled over, and tried to go back to sleep. But she knew it wouldn't come.

Just when she thought her situation couldn't get any worse, her cell phone rang next to her head. She fought off the piercing headache caused by the sound of Do It Like A Dude blasting into her ear. She lifted it above her head to stare up at it, and her stomach did a flip flop (which it did all too often these days, but for different reasons). It was Simon Lewis. Should she answer it? What would she say? She supposed that he was none the wiser about her situation since they hadn't seen each other sinceâ€¦that night. She could act aloof and everything would be okay. She pressed the button to answer the call.

"Hello?" she croaked, sounding less normal than she meant to. Her throat was still raw and sore from throwing up.

"Oh, did I catch you at a bad time?" he asked. Instantly, she was sorry she'd made him sound so guilty. She was surprised at herself for feeling this, considering she usually didn't give a damn and would probably usually have said "yes" and hung up. But she wanted to soothe him.

"No, no. I'm just laying in bed. I'm tired from the flight I guess." She hoped he didn't know that her flight was three days ago. She also hoped that he didn't know she made said flight and did seven or eight shoots the next day on a regular basis.

"Oh, sorry. I was justâ€¦well uhâ€¦" Usually this would annoy her beyond belief, but she was all of a sudden finding it cute and endearing to hear him stutter on the phone with her. What was going on with her? She couldn't stand him and she only fucked him because she was drunk. She didn't even really remember it. And she certainly didn't remember him telling her she was beautiful without her makeup on. Nope, she definitely didn't remember that at all.

"What is it, Simon?" she asked. She liked the way his name rolled off her lips. JESUS! What the fuck? She tried to mentally slap herself for being so emotional all of a sudden.

"Well, there's this gig that my band is doing down at the Big Apple Underground in a few days. I was wondering ifâ€¦you'd like to come. I mean I know you really probably don't want to be seen at a place like that, but its dark and no one really expects you to be there, so I doubt there will be cameras to catch you thereâ€¦" he trailed off, sounding hopeful. There was no way on earth she could resist.

"I'd love to," she said without even thinking about it. What the hell, she thought.

"It's okay, I understaâ€¦wait, what?" Could he _be_ any more adorable? UGH! What's wrong with me! she thought.

"I said I'd love to go," she repeated. "What day and time?"

"It's Friday night. We uhâ€¦we go on at ten."

"I'll be there," she said.

"Great," he returned. He seemed at a loss for words. "Well, now I don't know what to say, since I was planning on begging you for about fifteen more minutes. I didn't have anything else lined up to talk about." He chuckled softly. She thought about his smile, his strong arms around her. If she had her way, they wouldn't talk. They would just lie there and be quiet. Oh my God, this has to stop. She kept warring with herself in her head, trying to hold on to her nonchalant, sarcastic nature when all she kept getting her mushy, emo thoughts that annoyed her, yet she couldn't make them stop. She was so disgusted with herself. However, she couldn't bring herself to be mean to Simon.

"Well, that's okay. I'm actually just going to go back to sleep. Try to bounce back from all the traveling lately," she said, hoping that sounded legit. Then all of a sudden, she felt it coming on. "Hold on!" she said hastily, jumping up and running to the bathroom. She set the phone down on the counter and proceeded to deposit her lunch into the toilet. Disgusted and frustrated, she flushed and washed her face. Then, she picked the phone up, hoping against hope that he hadn't heard. "Okay, I'm back. Sorry about that."

"Isabelle, are you okay?" the concern in his voice was painfully apparent.

"I'm fine. Just a bug, I guess. I'll be better in time for your show."

"Oh, okay. But if not, you don't have to come. I'll understand, trust me," he said hastily.

"Deal," she replied. "I'll see you then."

"'Kay. Bye Isabelle." And he hung up. It was like butter, the way her name slid past his lips. She mentally kicked herself one last time for having such insane thoughts, then she felt the nausea hit her again, and she dropped her phone and ran for the bathroom again.


	30. Chapter 30

Alec lay awkwardly on his low modern couch, trying in vain to get comfortable enough to take a nap. He knew Jace would be here in the next hour or so, but he was just so exhausted. He was sure the effort of getting around on crutches, combined with all the painkillers he'd been popping, were to blame. But he wasn't about to stop those; he was already trying to see about weaning himself off of them, and he'd spent the last two hours in complete misery waiting for the ones he took to kick in again. He sighed and heaved himself into a new position, wincing at the shooting pain that bolted to his Achilles' tendon. _Fuck this leg._

He was just starting to actually feel comfy when he heard a knock at the door. He mentally cursed himself for not just leaving it unlocked.

"Come on, old man!" Jace shouted through the door, probably waking all the neighbors, seeing as it was nearly midnight on a Monday night. Alec thought about just leaving him out there to fend for himself for the night. But alas, his nurturing instinct when it came to Jace could not be overridden. Jace was his adopted little brother, and had lost his parents before he got to know them. He never really showed it in front of anyone else, but he felt a little ostracized within the Lightwood family. Alec could tell, and he always felt it his duty to keep Jace in the loop, so to speak. He went out of his way to care for him and make sure he was comfortable, which probably led to his infatuation for his younger cousin. He didn't ever really refer to him as that, only in his head. For all intents and purposes, Jace was his full-blood brother, which made Alec's previous infatuation all the more bizarre to him. Now that he had Magnus, thinking of Jace in that way seemed ridiculous.

With a Herculean effort, he managed to sit up and stand, refusing to use crutches to get the four feet to the door. He hobbled over and unlocked it, leaning against the doorframe to catch his breath. His body felt so heavy under all the painkillers, he could barely stand to move a few feet without getting exhausted. Jace came through the door carrying three huge duffel bags. He threw them down on the floor as soon as he saw Alec. Alec supposed he looked about as bad as he felt.

"Dude, you look like shit." Well, that confirmed it.

"I feel like shit," he replied.

"Here, sit back down. If I had known you were this bad I would have just picked the lock. I probably would have gotten inside quicker, anyway," he said with a laugh as he put Alec's arm over his shoulder and used his massive arms to hold Alec up around his waist as he practically carried him back to the couch. Alec didn't even feel weird having him that close like he usually did. It was a nice relief.

"Thanks," Alec said as he settled back down while Jace grabbed his bags and set them next to the couch. He plopped down in the chair next to the couch and heaved a great, relaxing sigh. "Long flight?" Alec asked.

"Eh. Not that bad. You've made it a couple times, so you know." Jace had just finished up filming his latest movie in Boston and had already planned on being in Malibu this week for a photoshoot for Details magazine. When he heard about what happened at the game, he got the shoot pushed back a week so he could be with Alec and help, since Isabelle had obligations in New York. All this fuss made Alec feel guilty, but he couldn't have foreseen this whole predicament. He did concede that he needed help around the apartment, and he would probably starve if someone wasn't there to actually cook or go out and get food for him. The doctor said he should be getting around better in a couple of weeks, but that his leg would take the better part of 2-3 months to completely heal. The fracture would be good in about 6 weeks, but the tendon was the worst. Alec cursed his luck.

"Well, thanks again for coming up here. I know they were pissed when you pushed back the shoot," he said.

"They can suck it. My big brother takes priority," Jace said, picking up the remote and turning on the TV. Jace could be a real ass sometimes, but Alec had to admit that when it came to his family, he was protective to a fault. He would bend over backwards for any of them. He noticed his healing eye and chuckled to himself that Clary had clocked him one. From what he understood, it was over that Simon guy and Isabelle which, truth be told, Alec didn't want to hear the details about. He didn't much like Isabelle tangling with a random musician, but unlike Jace, Alec didn't delve into his siblings' business. He just wanted them each to be happy. If one of them was hurt in the process, well, that was another story. But as long as they were happy, he didn't see any reason to pry.

"Bro, there isn't shit on TV in LA like, ever," Jace whined as he flipped through the channels. He passed up a few soccer games that Alec would have liked to watch, but Alec being Alec, he held his tongue because Jace was nice enough to be here in the first place, so he could watch what he wanted.

The two watched intermittent snippets of random shows for about two hours before Alec heard Jace yawn and get up. He walked over to his bag and pulled out his little Spongebob pillow from home. That thing went _everywhere_ with him. No one else but Isabelle and Alec knew, and if anyone ever found out, both of them would be dead within the hour, Jace had made that clear. Still, Alec couldn't help but chuckle to himself as Jace hugged it close for a second before placing it in the chair he'd been sitting in. Then, he stood over Alec and held his arms out.

"What?" Alec asked.

"Come on, you gotta sleep sometime," Jace said, reaching down and taking Alec's hands to help him up.

"Oh, no. You can have the bed. I'll stay on the couch. It's way to much effort to get up anyway," Alec said. Jace wasn't convinced.

"Get up, pretty boy, or I'll drag you." When niceties failed, Jace was usually direct. Alec sighed and took Jace's outstretched hands. Massive biceps worked to pull him into a standing position, and then his arm was slung over Jace's shoulders again, his younger brother carrying him toward his bedroom. When they finally made it there (after two or three stops for Alec to catch his breath and try to hide the pain in his face), Jace set him gently on the edge of the bed. Alec laid down on his side and Jace gingerly picked up his feet and slid them around so Alec was laying comfortably. He grabbed a blanket from the end of the bed and slung it over Alec.

Alec was taken aback by just how much Jace was actually caring for him. He figured he would get food when Jace was hungry, and would have someone around to talk to while he was bedridden, but this was beyond what he expected. Granted, Magnus had done the exact same things for him while he was here (with the exception being that neither of them took the couch), but with Magnus and their situation, Alec kind of expected it. From Jace, it was a pleasant surprise. He chose not to acknowledge his thoughts out loud, considering Jace would probably make a smartass comment and "accidentally" slap him lightly on the leg. He had to admit, big bear Jace had a gentle side. He was already drifting off before Jace shut the door on him to go sleep on the couch.

The next day, they both woke at about noon. They hadn't done that since they were kids. Jace went out and got Chinese, because that's what he ate all the time, regardless of the hour or if he'd just woken up. Alec was momentarily reminded of Magnus' comment about a Disney movie when they were eating noodles, while he was here. He missed Magnus a lot; more than he wanted to admit. He was having really vivid dreams, courtesy of the painkillers; Magnus was there every night, looking into his eyes, kissing him, singing him to sleep. It was torturous not to be near him. They'd shared so much in such a short time that he was damn near addicted. He was going through withdrawals. He tried to substitute Jace's perky company, but it just wasn't the same.

"So, what to watch today?" Jace said to himself. Alec knew he wasn't really asking; he would pick what he wanted anyway. He flipped through the channels until he landed on E!. That was undoubtedly Jace's favorite channel, since it almost always had something to say about him. It was usually about his love life, but occasionally they would review or mention his movies. He tossed the remote down and settled in with his General Tso chicken while Alec nibbled his noodles in silence, barely paying attention. His latest pill was starting to kick in and he had to fight to lift his arm to put the food in his mouth. But he wasn't complaining; at least his leg didn't hurt as bad.

"When we come back we'll make the rounds and show you who's been smooching and who's been lonely lately," Giuliana said to the camera.

"Yeah, and have we got a juicy one for you! I'll give you a hint: it involves a Lightwood," Ryan said with a raise of his eyebrows. God, he was such a leprechaun.

"Oh shit, I hope they didn't catch me and Clary at Cherry Bomb the other night. I was wasted out of my mind. I only really remember the last part of the night, nothing in between." Jace looked mildly nervous but otherwise unimpressed with the upcoming news about him. They both automatically assumed it was him and not Isabelle, since she'd pretty much stayed out of the dating scene lately. Although, Jace had said she was sitting on Simon's lap at Cherry Bomb. It was a tossup. There was always something about one of them in the gossip news. Jace and Isabelle put their love lives on display without a care.

"You only remember the last part because she pretty much beat it into you," Alec said around a lazy mouthful of noodles. They chewed while the commercials played. Alec wasn't all that curious what they had to say about either one of his siblings. It wasn't like it was front page news that they got around (not slutty, of course, but they were both so pretty they were very much sought after).

Suddenly Ryan Seacrest's annoying voice came back and Jace perked up a little. "And we're back with some sinfully juicy details on who's been snuggling who!" Then they went into a rundown of who was snogging at some party at the Palms last night. Apparently there was a big celebrity turnout, and there were plenty of drunken makeouts. Jace was already bored with the whole thing.

"Now, I'm sure you're used to seeing an update on the dating shenanigans of our most beloved action hero, Jace Lightwood," Giuliana began. Jace perked up again. "But interestingly, he's not the Lightwood on our list today."

"That's right, G!" Ryan burst in, eager to spill the news. "It just so happens that the Lightwood we're referring to has actually never been a part of this segment. He's always been the recluse of the family when it comes to his love life. And, it seems, for a tangible reason."

Jace was watching the screen with mild curiosity, the situation not dawning on him yet. Then, a slightly blurry photo flashed on the screen. Time slowed down a little. He just stared at the picture, trying to figure out what the hell he was looking at.

"Alecâ€¦" he began. Alec was still munching away quietly at his noodles, not looking at the screen. He was kind of in a daze, but when Jace said his name, he looked up. Jace hadn't moved his eyes from the screen, so Alec's eyes slid in that direction. All of a sudden, his eyes went wide and he couldn't blink. He couldn't breathe. He choked on his food. He just stared.

"It seems that famed Galaxy scorer Alexander Lightwood, who was injured in their last game against the Dallas Burn, has found an activity to occupy his time while he's off the field. He was seen here, outside his apartment in LA, locking lips with fashion icon and Manhattan club owner, Magnus Bane, two days ago."

_Dear God. Is this real? _Alec thought. He glanced over at Jace, finding what he pretty much expected. His mouth was hanging open and he was just staring at the screen. They weren't taking the picture away. Why weren't they taking it away. Oh, there it goes. SHIT! THERE'S MORE! Alec watched in agony as picture after picture flashed across the screen, showing a slow progression of Magnus' departure from his apartment two days ago: him turning back to Alec, Alec telling him 'I love you', Alec grabbing his arm, Magnus putting his arm around Alec's waist, Alec putting a hand on Magnus' neck, pulling him closer, then finally, their lips colliding. There was shot after shot of that ten second kiss, and the slideshow seemed to go on forever.

"We're wondering how in the world they've been hiding this obviously passionate love affair!" Giuliana said when the screen returned to them. "While there's been no shortage of his siblings in the news, Alexander has always remained the elusive Lightwood. We're betting he's a little insecure? Well, bring it on out, Alexander! The world loves you anyway." The screen cut to Ryan.

"When we return, we'll let you in Kim's secret to keeping that gorgeous figure of hers. We'll be right back." The screen jumped to commercial again.

Alec still couldn't breathe. It was like it wasn't really happening. It was like this was all a dream. Maybe it was; maybe he was so drugged up he was seeing things.

"Alec." Jace was looking at him with a level, scarily calm gaze. "Is there anything you want to tell me?"


	31. Chapter 31

Jace's golden eyes bored into Alec like lasers. His gaze was steady, his breathing normal, but those eyes held everything. Alec, on the other hand, couldn't remember how to fill his lungs with air. He was still half choking on his noodles, wondering if it was all a dream. God, he hoped so. He wanted to pinch himself to see if he'd wake up. Maybe it was still the drugs. Maybe he was hallucinating.

"Alec. I'm your fucking brother. Answer me," Jace said.

"What?" he was having trouble forming a coherent thought. His entire brain was screaming and all he wanted to do was run. But he couldn't, because he was crippled at the moment. He desperately needed his car. She would know what to say to him. It felt like the world was crashing down around him and he could do nothing about it.

"Is there something you want to tell me? Because, to be totally honest, a fuckload of things are clicking into place in my head right now." His voice was completely calm, and it scared Alec to death. This was the one thing he feared above anything else: his teammates, his parents, his sister. Jace won out over them all. He had played the possible destructive scenario in his head a thousand times, and it always ended in disaster; hence, his vow to keep it forever hidden. What was supposed to happen now? He was just outed on international television. He couldn't deny it anymore. Alec was certainly not the type to just say it was a kiss between friends. And anyway, the pictures didn't lie. The feeling between them was almost tangible, and it was about as far from friendship as two people could get.

"Jace, Iâ€¦I don't know. Iâ€¦" he stuttered. He lost all train of thought under that gaze. He just knew that if he actually said it out loud, Jace would abandon him. He'd lose his only brother, and he absolutely couldn't bear that. But what did he do now?

"Yes, you do," Jace said, and his face changed. It went from calm to almost pleading. It broke Alec's heart to see that look directed at him. It was so full of hurt and betrayal that he could barely stand it.

"Jace, I'm sorry. Iâ€¦"

Then, Jace stood up forcefully, making Alec jump back a little. "Don't. Don't apologize," he said. Then he walked away, going into Alec's room and closing the door. Alec didn't know what to do or say. He felt like his stomach had dropped down about 20 floors. He thought he might throw up. Just then, his cell phone vibrated on the end table.

He looked at it, not recognizing the number. He answered it anyway. What else was he going to do? "Hello?" it came out a little distorted but he hoped the other person got the message.

"Alexander?" It was a girl's voice that sounded vaguely familiar. "I got your number from Magnus' phone. And unless you are all of a sudden a eunuch and your voice has permanently gone up three octaves, I'm assuming you were watching television just now." He recognized the voice now: Magnus' best friend Camille.

"Uhâ€¦y-yeah," he said lamely.

"Well, this has got to be the one time in the history of the universe that Magnus wasn't watching E!, so he didn't see it. Not that it would matter. He's pretty much nonchalant about his attractions. But I was just wondering how you were holding up?"

"Holding up? I haven't exactly had time to adjust at allâ€¦"

"I mean are you okay? I'm pretty sure your teammates aren't the kind to watch that stuff, but what about your family? Do you think they saw it?" she asked. He was bizarrely touched by her concern; it was a small pinprick of light through the ceiling of his impeding abyss.

"Well, my sister already knows butâ€¦" he trailed off, the statement bringing back what had just taken place.

"What is it?"

"Jace was here. Is here. He saw." Saying it brought it all back in force.

"And?" she asked.

"And he's not speaking to me."

The next 24 hours was spent in total silence. Jace did his job helping Alec around and feeding him when he couldn't get up, but not a word was spoken between them. The silent treatment was weighing on Alec, and before long, he just couldn't take it anymore.

"Jace? Please talk to me," he said as they sat in the living room, doing nothing and saying nothing.

"Why? You don't talk to me."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Alec was a little hurt by his tone.

"Could we cut the bullshit here? Just be honest with me. That's all I'm asking. As your familyâ€¦as your _brother_, I think you owe me that much," Jace said. He had that level gaze directed at Alec again.

"Jace, I don't know what to tell you."

"How about the truth? What did that mean? What did those pictures mean, Alec?" his voice was strung thin and tight.

"They meanâ€¦what you think they mean I guess," Alec said.

"No. That's not gonna cut it. I thought we were close. I thought you could tell me anything. You love me, right?"

"Of course I do! Why would you think I didn't?" Alec asked, dumbfounded.

"Because if you truly did love me like your only brother, you wouldn't keep yourself hidden from me," Jace replied. That steady gaze was wearing Alec down. "Tell me, Alec. I just want to hear you say it."

Alec paused for a long time. "The truth is, I've never actually said it out loud to anyone, so I don't think I can. Can't you just understand? My life was just broadcast on international television! I know you don't give two fucks if it happens to you, but obviously I had some things I wanted to keep to myself! Now what am I supposed to do? The team will find out, and they'll probably murder me. The tabloids are going to rip me to shreds. Mom and Dad are probably so in shock they can't function right now. And all because of me and my stupid secret! You see how it ruins lives? Not just mine, but everyone around me! It's been hell keeping it to myself all these years, but I did it because I thought it was the right thing to do! And nowâ€¦now that I found someone that I feel on fire for, when I finally have my head above water with this whole thing, _this_ happens, and it ruins _everything_. I know you're disgusted. I know you don't want to be around me right now and I know not everyone can have the same reactions as Isabelle. I knew that, so I kept it to myself. Fuck!"

"Isabelle knows?" Now Jace looked really hurt. Alec sighed deeply. "I see. Is it because I'm not really your brother? I don't deserve to be included in important shit like this? Jesus, Alec! It's like I hardly know you! You've kept something that's so important about yourself from me! Why couldn't you just treat me like the brother I thought I was to you? What makes me so horrible that you didn't think I was worthy of being let in? Honestly, I could give a fuck if you're gay! I could give a fuck if you were born a girl! I just don't understand why you couldn't just _tell me_."

The turn the conversation had taken threw Alec for a moment. He was sure that if Jace ever found out about his sexuality that his brother would practically disown him. He never thought that his problem would be that he was upset about being kept out of the loop. But Alec should have thought of that first. He always tried to "include" Jace with everything else because he knew he felt not quite entirely part of the family sometimes. And this, keeping this huge secret from him along with Isabelle knowing, that was the worst possible thing Alec could have done. He could see that now. And now Jace was walking away again; but this time, Alec knew exactly why.

When the door to his own room shut again, quieter this time, Alec leaned back on the couch and tried to cope with the intense feeling of guilt that washed over him. And then, just like the day before, his phone rang. He looked over at the screen, and froze.

It was Magnus.

What could he do? What could he say? This was all just too much right now. As the ring died and voicemail picked up, Alec put his head in his hands. The ringing started back up again, but Alec just let it play on. He just couldn't deal with it.


	32. Chapter 32

His phone kept ringing, and Alec kept ignoring it. What was he supposed to say? He guessed Camille had told Magnus about them being outed on television. Alec just wasn't sure what he was going to do about it. He knew that the next time he set foot outside, the paparazzi would swarm with endless questions. He thought about not even acknowledging it; he would act like they were crazy if they brought it up, like it never happened. But then he thought better of that, since that would only make him look ridiculous. He considered several other possibilities, including owning up to it, which was preposterous. He could never go through with it. So, he decided on denial. It was the coward's way out, but he didn't see any other viable option. He was terrified; his life was crumbling around him. This secret seemed to define his entire being, and now it was threatening to pull him under, and in the public eye.

He thought it over, and was resolved to his decision. He would simply deny that it was what it was. He and Magnus were not together, they were just friends. Acquaintances, really. Magnus had been in LA, heard about the accident, and come to pay him a casual visit. When he left, Alec had given him a friendly hug goodbye. The pictures were blurry; he could eventually convince people that they weren't _actually_ kissing. It was just an awkward angle. That happened all the time in the tabloids, right? That's how they got those ridiculous headlines out of completely innocent pictures. Yes, this would work, and everything would eventually blow over. Simple, really.

The next time his phone buzzed, he took a deep breath before touching the screen to answer it. "Hello?"

"Alec?" Magnus' voice was quiet and concerned, like he was afraid of startling Alec. "Where were you?"

"Sorry, I wasâ€¦asleep. All those painkillers, you know," he said, steeling himself for what he was about to do.

"Yeah. Soâ€¦I saw the rerun of E News. We were pretty much front and center," Magnus said cautiously.

"Yeah, I guess so. But I think I know of a way to handle this," Alec said determinedly.

"Oh? Well, that's a relief. I thought you'd be completely freaking out."

"I think we should just deny the whole thing. I mean, the pictures were really blurry and at a weird angle, so they can't actually prove we were kissing. I could just say that it was a friendly hug goodbye. You were just randomly in LA and came to visit. Simple as that. There's not way they could prove we're together, or even more than mere acquaintances." When he finished, the line was quiet for so long that he thought Magnus might have gotten disconnected. "You there?"

"Uh, yeah. Alec, Iâ€¦why would you do that?" Magnus' voice had gotten very quiet.

"Do what?" he asked.

"Deny it. Why would you deny me? Why not just man up and own up to the facts? I mean, I'll admit it wasn't the best way to come out to the world, but it was kind of like a band aid, you know? It's over now. Why not acknowledge it and move on?" There was a twinge of something in his voice that Alec half recognized, but couldn't put his finger on. It was out of character for Magnus, though not completely new to him.

"You know it's not that easy. There's no way the team will ever accept it, not to mention the rest of society. I mean seriously, how can I be able to stand the backlash from something like this? People will talk, the fans of the team will go elsewhere. No one wants a fag for their top scorer." Alec winced at his use of the word, but it was what other people would put it as. Again, Magnus was scarily quiet until he spoke again.

"So you're afraid of what others will say? As if it matters? Just FYI, I met Donovan Ricketts at the hospital while I was _not sleeping_ for a week and a half in that ridiculous rack of a chair. And you know what, Alec? He knows. He's known for a long time, and he doesn't care. What makes you think the rest of the team will be any different?" His words should have been making his voice rise, but it stayed eerily soft, as if he knew he was already defeated and he was just babbling nonsense before he rolled over and tapped out. It was painful for Alec to listen to.

"He's just one guy. And he's probably the most weirdly compassionate out of all of them. _If_ he doesn't care, it's just a fluke. I can't expect the rest of them to understand in the least. And Jace isn't talking to me anymore. Magnus, I'm losing my family over this," Alec said, his voice getting higher with every sentence.

"That's not true. Isabelle and Jace love you. You're their family. Jace just needs time to adjust. And Isabelle's fine with it, you know that," he said.

"This is how it's going to be, Magnus," Alec said, choosing to just lay down the law and quit arguing. "I'm sorry. We can't be seen together anymore, though I don't think that will be a problem, considering the distance. We can still talk on the phone and stuff. I still love you, I justâ€¦can't deal with this. I just want it to go away. Everything will be okay when it just blows over. It'll all be okay." This time, Magnus' response was instant.

"No," was all he said.

"What?" Alec responded, puzzled.

"No, it will not be okay. No, we can't talk on the phone. No, you don't still love me. If you choose to treat me like a minion who will just roll over and do what you say, and deny my own self and you in the process, then no. I'm better than that." He seemed to pause, gathering his strength. His voice was quavering. "If you want to act like we aren't anything, then we won't _be_ anything. That way, it makes it that much easier on you. You don't have to live two lives, just the one. Just the one without me." Throughout his entire speech, Magnus' voice held that creeping quality that Alec couldn't identify. At the end, it dawned on him. He was hurt. Not hurt as in his feelings were bruised and he needed to brood for a while. Hurt like someone had just told him he wasn't worth the soil he walked on. Hurt like someone just kicked him out on his ass from the most comforting home he'd ever known. Hurt like someone had abandoned him in favor of some other world. Hurt like someone he thought the entire world of had just left him completely alone.

It was the voice he used when he talked about his mother.

And now it was Alec, pulling that heart ripping tone out of him. Before Alec could respond, he heard the line go dead. He held his phone for a couple of seconds before setting it down on the coffee table and leaning back into the couch. He heaved a long, slow, heavy sigh. Somehow, it didn't feel like everything was going to be okay. He'd technically gotten what he wanted. There was no chance that the media could prove that he had a boyfriend when he didn't. He didn't even have to hide talking to Magnus or being seen with him. All his problems were solved. So why did it feel like his world had _really_ crashed to ground now?

* * *

He stared down at his phone for a few seconds, looking at it like he'd never seen such a device in his life. How could something so small and inconsequential make such a huge difference in his life? How could something tiny and plastic cause so much damage to the human heart?

He didn't think. He just let his body go. The phone crashed against the far wall of the living room of his Brooklyn penthouse and shattered into a thousand tiny pieces, each one resembling a sliver of his soul that he thought had been mended forever. He realized, rationally, that the phone wasn't to blame. Only another human could cause this much pain. Only another human could lift you up till you almost touched the yellow brick road that led to St. Peter, then with one word yank you back down by your ankles and throw you into the pits of hell. He had so much hate in his heart at the moment, built up in that few minutes of phone conversation. Why was it, then, that none of it would fly over to that place inside him and stick to the memory of Alexander Lightwood? Every piece of hatred that floated within him seemed to slip off Alec's memory like it was greased. In turn, they rebounded and stuck like thorns into Magnus' own soul. Because obviously, it was him; it had always been him. Everything always happened because he messed up, because he wasn't there to make it right. His parents fighting, his mother's death, and now what he thought was the love of his life. He was useless.

He got up from his perch on the arm of the couch and began stalking across the living room. On the way into his bedroom, he reached over and slammed the cover down on the ivory keys of the piano, rattling the strings on the inside and causing a mournful, despondent, nonsense chord to echo through the entire apartment.


	33. Chapter 33

"Seriously, you're driving me insane. Your nails are chipping like a mother fucker and you've got split ends. You've got to get out of this funk." Camille kept droning on as usual, but he wasn't really listening. He knew she was better at tough love than sweet sentiments, and she'd used up all her patience with compassion in the past three weeks. He had to admit she'd put up with quite a bit from him.

He'd started off right after the initial breakup with endless tears and moaning about how his life was so fucked up and just when it gets good it has to go to shit again. He'd never really been one for moping and whining, but he did his fair share. The next week it turned into how much he hated the fucking world and everyone could fucking die for all he cared and he didn't give a shit about anyone and they were all mother fucking idiots anyway. That week, Camille refused to be in the same room with him, since he tended to throw things and once he threw her Louis Vuitton mirror compact against the piano, shattering it and scattering Swarovski crystals everywhere (he had since bought her a new one). This week was shaping up to be his "I don't give a fuck about anything" week. He was just quiet, and she was right: he'd let his physical appearance fall by the wayside. His manicure was at least a month old and barely qualified as polished anymore. His hair hung loose around his face, not having seen gel in an obscene amount of time. And most importantly, his wardrobe had suffered drastically. He'd worn a t-shirt and tattered jeans every day for three weeks. Sometimes he wore the same t-shirt twice in one week. He could almost be classified as straight. It was revolting.

He'd been at Cherry Bomb every night, but only intermittently did he join Camille in their usual corner. He spent most of his time up in his office/glorified dressing room, just staring in the mirror and being disgusted with himself but too lazy and nonchalant to give a fuck. But he could see that Camille was right. If he was ever going to get over a certain dreamy, ocean-eyed soccer player, he'd have to give up his bitchfit routine.

They were sitting in his office above Cherry Bomb now, he at his antique cherry wood vanity and Camille perched on the arm of a flawless purple suede chaise. The dÃ©cor in here was much like downstairs, except there was a lot more dark than light. Downstairs, the couches and chairs and barstools were white, for the simple fact that they were easier to see among all the darkness that shrouded the room. In here, Magnus' vanity had bright Hollywood dressing lights around the mirror, and there was a ridiculously expensive chandelier hanging from the ceiling, providing ample light for him to perfect his appearance before hitting the floor of his establishment. Tonight was the first night he was actually giving a hell what he looked like since the breakup.

He sat, his ass clad in his trademark black leather pants, a lime green paisley Armani dress shirt unbuttoned and hanging off his slender shoulders. He was currently wielding a bright purple eyeliner pencil, tracing a heavy line with a substantial wing at the corner. It was kind of hard, considering he hadn't picked up makeup in a while. But he managed, and he had to admit he looked fierce again. He felt his spirits lifted a little, and he thought he saw a light at the end of the tunnel. He was just hoping it wasn't a train.

He was making progress. He got up to examine his appearance in the full length mirror next to Camille, and she gave it a tentative thumbs-up. His hair and nails were still a mess, but at least his face and body looked more like himself. Half the time, he almost didn't recognize the man in the mirror anymore, but this was a step in the right direction. He dug around in the drawers of his vanity for hair gel.

"Oh my God, hell has frozen over. He just picked up hair products," Camille mused to herself. But when he turned to glare at her, she was smiling. He let it roll off of him. He'd actually missed their banter.

"Fuck off, woman. I'm in beast mode," he said. She smiled a genuine smile, and he felt a little better.

When he'd finished primping, he grabbed a purple velvet blazer and glanced one last time in the mirror. His nails were hopeless, but the rest looked put together. "Alright. Let's go see what the masses are up to downstairs." He started to walk out the door towards the stairs, down to the lounge where he could already hear the bass thumping and people shouting over it.

"Oh, no mister. We're not holing up here tonight," Camille said, standing up and lacing her arm through his. He cocked an eyebrow at her in question. "I'm taking you somewhere special. It'll be fun, I swear!" she added at his scoff. He shrugged. How bad could it be? Had to be better than here, watching all the couples, gay and straight alike, grinding on each other and engaging in sickening PDA.

* * *

Okay, this was worse than he thought. He looked around the room, the walls littered with old advertisements and street signs, the floors scraped and scuffed, and the patrons of all shapes and sizes. He was in a world that was so opposite of what he belonged in, it was almost painful. He kept glaring at his best friend, and wondering if she was a little sick in the head. It wasn't like she belonged here either with her Prada heels and Versace jersey knit wrap dress. She pointedly ignored his glares and swept him up to the guy behind the counter by the door. He was wearing a Grateful Dead t-shirt, a necklace with an intricate Celtic cross pendant, and his dirty blonde hair was curling down into his clear, hazel eyes. He was pretty, but clearly not Magnus' type. He inwardly groaned at himself. When he was on the rebound, every guy was a potential hookup for the first 10 seconds or so.

"Hi there!" he said cheerfully, taking them in. He didn't seem put off by their flashy-ness like Magnus had expected. "Are either of you going up tonight?" he asked. Magnus had no earthly clue what he meant. He looked to Camille. She gave him a devilish smile.

"He is," she said, pointing to Magnus. "But I don't think you'd want to hear from me. You might lose customers," she laughed.

The guy chuckled and smiled a pearly white grin and said, "Oh, I think you'd actually bring the customers in." Well, Camille was used to getting compliments like that. "Okay, then its ten for him and twenty for you, sugar." Camille handed him the money and he waved them on. She pulled Magnus through to the larger part of the room, where there were multiple tables and chairs at different heights: some were regular, some were bar height, and some were situated on a raised mezzanine in the back of the room. People were scattered all over, drinking mixed drinks and beers alike, munching on finger foods and laughing amongst themselves. He wasn't sure what the hell Camille's motive to come to this place was, but he could hardly see himself fitting in here. It wasn't flashy or loud, or filled with socialites. It was odd.

"So that's got to be the first time _I've_ gotten a discount and you had to pay full price. And something tells me it's not because he has the hots for me. What gives?" he asked. She just raised her eyebrows at him. Getting no answer from her, he scanned the room again. And that's when he noticed it.

There was a tiny raised platform at the far corner of the room, and most of the tables and chairs seemed aimed toward it. It was adorned with a microphone, a guitar, and a piano.

He froze, his eyes wide. "No. Hell no." He tried to back up and turn around, trying for the fastest exit out of this hell hole. He didn't care if he went out an emergency door and set off the fire alarm.

"You got a discount because you're providing entertainment," she said.

"Fuck that. Not a chance in hell. Camille, are you fucking insane?" he was incredulous. She actually expected him to get up there andâ€¦what? Sing karaoke or something? He hadn't performed in front of strangers since he was in college. Since before his motherâ€¦ This was _not_ happening. Not. Fucking. Happening. End of story.

"Oh, come on you pussy. I've heard you. You're still amazing, no matter what you think. And you _can_ do this," she said more seriously, seeing the terrified look in his eyes. "You did it forâ€¦" and there she seemed to cut herself off. He knew what she'd been about to say. He'd done it for Alec. Well, a fat lot of good that did him. If anything, it just made his aversion to performing worse. And he was not about to have a nervous breakdown in front of a bunch of hippie strangers in a downtown Brooklyn bar just so she could prove a point.

"Don't pussy me," he retorted. "I don't do this anymore. Not even this karaoke shit."

"It's not karaoke. It's an open mic night," she said as she continued pulling on his arm, trying to get him to sit at one of the few empty tables. The place was packed. How had he not known about this place before? He used to frequent the bars in Brooklyn before stepping up to Manhattan socializing. He'd liked the quirkiness, but ultimately deemed it wasn't for him. He liked flashy. But thisâ€”this was ridiculous.

"Camille," he pleaded. "Please don't make me do this. Please."

"Magnus, I love you. I believe in you, and I know you believe in yourself somewhere deep down. As much as I hate to say it, Alec made a valid point. Don't you dare give me that look. It's true. You're letting her memory die by not doing what you love. What _she_ loved. Magnus, if you just open up and let those pipes do what they were meant to do, she'd come back to you full force." She looked him straight in his yellow-green eyes. Her emerald ones bore into him like lasers, and he knew she was right.

That didn't mean he could do it.

But, he finally let her start leading him to a table in the middle of the floor. He could feel a couple of stares on his back, probably due to his wardrobe and makeup. He didn't give a damn; he never had. But he still didn't feel comfortable in this place. It wasn't that he wanted to go somewhere were _he_ fit in, it was that the place didn't fit _him_. Nevertheless, he fell into a chair and set his eyes on the makeshift stage. It didn't look very menacing, but then again, it was all inside his head. He equated performance with the memory of his mother. It was like it was completely unfair and selfish of him to do it when she wasn't here. It was always the one thing that brought her joy.

He thought for a moment on that. He didn't really know if he believed in a Heaven or Hell, but he believed that she was watching him from somewhere. He couldn't bear it if she was justâ€¦gone. So, he thought, why not indulge her? Maybe Alec did have a point. Her memory wouldn't slip away if he called it back to him in the most tangible way he knew how. And that was his biggest fear: losing her altogether. He'd warred with himself over this for years, never really finding a steady ground of the argument to stand on. But sitting here, faced with the inevitable, he thought to himself that maybe Alec and Camille were right. As much as he hated to admit it, his mother's memory fading was all his fault. It was his fault for being so cowardly and selfish, for ceasing to share what she used to call his most precious gift. She always called him her angel, and now he was hers. It was an odd feeling, being hit that hard with resolve. It had never happened to him before, and he didn't really like the feeling, but he knew he had to grow a pair someday. Might as well be today.

He sat through a couple of people's songs. The first guy went up and played an original composition on the piano. He was actually very good, and Magnus enjoyed it. When he was done, he played a piano mashup of "Forget You" and "Possum Kingdom". It wasâ€¦interesting to say the least, but massively entertaining. The next one was a small, shy girl with blonde hair and skinny jeans. She simply sat on a stool and played acoustic guitar versions of Manson songs. Surprisingly, Magnus was entertained by that too. He didn't think an open mic night would be this fun. But then, it was his turn. He gulped loudly.

"Okay, everybody! Welcome our next performer to the stage, Magnus Bane!" He began to clap and gestured to Magnus, who was all of a sudden terrified again and glued to his chair. The room erupted in applause, and Camille had to almost pry his ass out of the chair for him to get going up there. He rose slowly, feeling the weight of a thousand eyes descend on him. They weren't a hostile crowd by any means, but it was the principle of it. This was the first time he'd performed in front of an audience in years. He approached the stage, and the announcer (the same guy from the front door) descended to take his seat next to the platform.

Magnus looked out at all the expectant faces, and was momentarily transported back. He remembered the last time he really performed. It was the last time his mother had come to visit him at school, for his sophomore scholarship concert. He'd sang six solos in "O Fortuna" with the University Choir, then a contemporary arrangement of "Somewhere Over the Rainbow". He remembered his mother sitting in the front row, her face lit up with such absolute pride that he botched the last note because he let out a small sob of joy.

This was nothing like that, but it had the same connotation. He was doing something he loved for people who wanted to hear it. He leaned over and picked up the acoustic guitar. It felt foreign in his hands; the guitar was only his secondary instrument. His prowess was with the piano. But for this particular song, the sweet strumming of a six string just fit. He'd written this song ages ago, about 4 months after they buried her, and it had described his life perfectly. He'd shut himself off to the world, never letting anyone in, and he always felt so thoroughly alone that it hurt either way. He supposed this time in his life was no different. He felt so alone and so fed up with the whole fucking situation that he just wanted to shut himself up in a room by himself, no matter how much it hurt. The outside always hurt worse.

He sat on the stool and pulled the microphone closer. "Hi, you guys. Umâ€¦this is a song I wrote a while ago. I don't think I have the wherewithal to do more than one tonight, so I hope you like it. If I waste your time, I'm sorry," he said. Camille gave him a stern look. He let a smile creep across his face for just a moment, before letting himself get into a place where he could actually open up his mouth and let notes come out.

He adjusted his position until he was comfortable, and the room quietly waited for him. He began idly strumming, finding the right chords. He knew the song well, even though he hadn't seen the words on paper or sang it in forever. Finally, he began picking out the opening bars, letting the vibrations of the instrument carry the notes across the otherwise silent room.

_Sitting in a big white room alone_

_I tilt my head back, let the tears roll down_

_Cause my eyes can't see in the dark_

_I feel young, broken, so so scared_

_I don't wanna be here anymore_

_Wanna be somewhere else_

_Normal and free, like I used to be_

_But I have to stay in the big white room_

_With little old me_

He gave himself over to the music for the first time in a long time. It was like the first night he and Alec made love. He just _felt_. He didn't see the audience, Camille, or anyone. He was in a big empty room, letting the echoes of the notes pouring from his lips engulf him and pull him through to the chorus.

_I'm going crazy_

_I'm losing my mind_

_I'm going crazy_

_In this big white room of mine_

He found himself getting angry and putting more force behind the words. This was always an anger song for him. But then, when he got to the second verse, he toned it down again.

_Sitting in a big white room alone_

_Close the door_

_Don't want the pain to come in_

_I clench my fist_

_And try to stay strong_

_I cry, I feel sick_

_My heart is beating out of control_

_Can I run more faster than you_

_I wanna feel my body again_

_Feel the wind in my hair_

_But I have to stay in this big white room_

_Cause no one else cares_

He got so into it that the rest of the world just melted away. He thought about Alec's eyes and his soft lips. He thought about his smile and his blush. His beauty. And he was all gone.

_I'm going crazy_

_I'm losing my mind_

_I'm going crazy_

_In this big white room of mine_

_Everybody's lookin at me_

_Everybody's starin at me_

_What do I do now?_

_Smile, yeah_

With one more round of the chorus, bringing it down to almost nothing, he strummed the last few bars and let the sound die out. He realized his eyes were closed, and they were a little wet. No tears on his cheeks, though. He opened them and looked out to the audience. They were silent for a good ten seconds. Then, the entire room exploded. People in the mezzanine were jumping out of their chairs, people in the back of the ground floor were standing on the tables, trying to catch a better glimpse of him, clapping like maniacs. His eyes found Camille, and she stood up with the biggest smile on her face. She wasn't clapping maniacally, just smiling at him like he was the world. He couldn't explain the rush that came over him at that sound. People were yelling and hooting and hollering like rabid fans. All this for a song he wrote when he was 21 and juvenile and scared? But the sound was infectious. It brought him back. He used to thrive on that sound, the steady rhythm of an audience applause. It used to be what his entire life was about. Could it be again?

He glanced to the left and blinked twice in rapid succession. And then he saw it. Long, lustrous ebony hair, perfectly almond-shaped eyes, and smooth caramel skin that mirrored his perfectly. She was beautiful, just like he remembered. She had a huge smile on her face and was clapping ten times louder than the rest of the room. She blew him a kiss, gave him a wink, then she disappeared. At that, he finally let the tear he'd been holding back drift down his smooth cheek.


	34. Chapter 34

The entire first week was spent in shock; Shock from what had been on television, shock from Jace's reaction to it (which wasn't nearly what he'd expected, but no less saddening), and shock at himself for actually saying what he said to Magnus over the phone. Had they actually broken up? Or were they taking a break? Or were they still together but just mad at each other? Well, Alec wasn't mad at Magnus at all; in fact, he was growing restless not hearing his voice. He'd called Magnus numerous times, to no avail. Apparently, Magnus _was_ mad at him. How could he not be? Alec had basically made the request that he shove himself back in the closet, put everything about himself that he was proud of and comfortable with already away in a drawer until Alec got a grip on himself. Alec wasn't sure he'd ever get a grip on himself.

The two weeks he was still house-ridden were the worst. He was confined to his small apartment, not able to get in his car and take a ride just to get some air. He could get around the apartment alright, but venturing out was still out of the question for the first couple of weeks after the breakup. His fracture was almost healed, but his tendon was being a pain in the ass. He couldn't bend his foot a certain way, and when it went to sleep it hurt like hell because he couldn't get the prickles to stop.

About three days before his prison sentence was up, Donovan came to visit him. He said they missed him at practice and hoped he was getting better.

"Are we just going to beat around the bush here?" Alec asked in a sullen tone after they'd chatted for 15 minutes or so.

"I'm not sure I know what you mean," said Donovan, and Alec knew full well he was just trying to make him say it. This was Donovan's way: he made you grow some balls, and man up. He didn't broach uncomfortable subjects _for_ you.

"Fine. Did you see it?" Alec inquired, still staring into space and speaking a little pouty.

"See what?" Donovan asked.

"You know," Alec returned. Donovan was silent. It annoyed Alec to the point of insanity sometimes how much Donovan acted like a dad to him. Other times, that fact proved to be the number one reason Donovan was his favorite teammate. "FINE. Did you see me _allegedly_ kissing a guy on television?"

"No," Donovan said after a small silent beat.

"Ohâ€”" Alec began lamely before Donovan cut him off.

"I saw you kissing your boyfriend on television."

Alec's head reeled around so fast he got whiplash. He stared at the chocolate skinned goalie that he'd come to trust and revere as a friend. The other man just stared him down with an expectant expression, as if he was waiting for Alec to deny it. As soon as he'd recovered, however, Alec went on the defensive. It was his go-to emotion in situations like this.

"Oh. Okay. So I suppose you are disgusted out of your mind, right? Along with everyone else? Go ahead. I know they told you how they feel about it. Why don't you share it with me?" Alec knew he was being petulant, but he couldn't help it.

"Uh, no?" Donovan began. "I'm happy for you, and for me. All this time, keeping your secret to myself, wellâ€¦I would never have told anyone, but it was really sucky that you wouldn't just man up and admit it."

"What do you mean, keeping my secret?"

"Alexander Lightwood, are you that dense? You are so transparent it's ridiculous. You don't shower with the team. You kind ofâ€¦freak out when other guys get too close to you. You watch that adopted brother of yours like a hawk. You've never had a serious girlfriend. Seriously, Buzz. Did you think no one noticed?" At the end of Donovan's speech, Alec was sure his face had become white as a sheet. Did everyone notice these things, or was it just Donovan? Because, if Alec was being honest, Donovan was an observant motherfucker. That didn't mean anyone else was, did it? Then again, hadn't Izzy figured it out on her own? Alec sighed deeply.

"I guess I hoped," was his lame answer.

"Honestly, Buzz. Is it really that big of a deal? So, you're gay. At least you have someone. Who is, I have to say, quite the nice fellow."

"What?" Alec was a little lost.

"I met the guy at the hospital. Magnus, is it? He's got a bit of a lingering British accent. Makes him kind of a kindred spirit. He was very nice, and animated. And, if you don't mind me saying so, quite handsome as well," Donovan finished, as if this were the most natural thing to be discussing in the world. Alec, meanwhile, was still reeling from the conversation beginning in the first place.

"I uhâ€¦Well, he's not my boyfriend anymore. I don't thinkâ€¦" Alec began, feeling lamely miserable.

"Why not? It lookedâ€¦serious from the pictures."

"Well, the pictures kind of had something to do with it." Donovan waited for him to go on. "I kind ofâ€¦freaked out and told him if any reporters or whatever asked me about it, I'd deny it. I panicked! It was the only thing I could think of!" Alec dropped his head into his hands, willing himself not to actually cry like a fucking baby in front of Donovan.

But the goalie just came over, sat next to him, and put an arm casually around his shoulders. "Man, you seriously need to get a grip. You know how I told you I met Mr. Bane at the hospital when you were laid up? Well, I was kind of starstruck honestly." Alec gave him a thoroughly confused look, and he continued. "I know who Magnus Bane is. My mother is pretty much obsessed with him and his glorious wardrobe, as she calls it. I've always thought he was a pretty cool cat, since he doesn't really give a flying fuck what people think of him. I mean, he dressed like an albino peacock for the Playboy white party last year," he said with a chuckle. Alec was a little taken aback that he'd never known this about Magnus. After all, he'd only met him when they'd gone to Cherry Bomb the first time. But Alec had never really kept up with the media if it didn't involve his siblings or his parents. "But I knew he was from New York, and at first I thought it was odd that he was here visiting you on such short notice. And then, I saw the way he looked at you, the way he would jump at any sign of movement from you, when he got worried when your breathing got a little erratic from phantom pain, and I knew. He'd rushed across the entire country just to be close to you and be there for you. That's a special kind of love." He paused and took his arm off Alec's shoulders, swiveling around to look him in the face. "My point is, Alexander, that if you have someone like that, who's willing to bend over backwards at the drop of a hat for you, that is so amazingly comfortable with himself and so incredibly, obviously, smitten with you despite your unending awkwardness, why on earth would you do something like that to him?"

Alec did not have the answer to that.

* * *

**Song for this section: You've Got the Love by Florence and The Machine (perfect song for this pair. She's always been there for him, and always will be. I love their sisbromance lol)**

After Magnus had descended the stage and parried lots of hugs and pats on the back from strangers, he sank down in his seat next to his best friend. He honestly didn't know how to feel at the moment. He was terrified of being judged, but he was proud for actually manning up and getting up there in the first place. And the crowd seemed to enjoy it, right? And it felt goodâ€¦likeâ€¦really good. He'd never felt so alive since the last concert he gave, which was way too long ago, before he left school. There was something about letting it all fall away and just projecting his voice like he was trying to flood the room with sound that brought him back to being the person he used to be. And, the incredible happened.

He had seen his mother, sitting there, cheering him on and looking exactly as he remembered her. The thought brought tears to his eyes.

"Are you okay? Magnus?" Camille said, placing a tentative hand on his thigh, drawing him out of his post-performance trance.

He lifted the heel of his hand up to swipe under his eyes, not caring that he ruined his mascara. "Yeah, I'm okay. I'm justâ€¦thank you. Thank you for this, Camille," he said, looking in her eyes and smiling.

"'Thank you' for what? Giving you the swift kick in the nuts that you so desperately needed? That hardly deserves a reward. Justâ€¦hearing what you did up thereâ€¦that was reward enough for the entire fucking room. Magnus, you are truly incredible. I mean, I've heard you hum along with the radio and well, that one time you serenaded your telephone with Christina, but seriously. I didn't even know you wrote stuff, let alone stuff that brilliant and moving. You make people feel what you feel. It's kind of scary, but amazingly so." She was looking him right in the eyes. This was the most serious, sarcasm-lacking speech that had ever passed her lips. He was touched by the sheer forcefulness of it. But also, he was touched by knowing there was still someone in the world that loved him, and appreciated him enough to know that he needed to hear it. Magnus was kind of a hardened shell. He lived like he didn't care what people thought, and he genuinely didn't, but that didn't mean he didn't need to hear that he was worthwhile; because lately, in the wake of recent events, he was feeling quite the opposite until Camille's little monologue.

He simply smiled at her, and she rolled her eyes and hugged him. When they heard a small clearing of a throat, they pulled apart. Camille looked behind Magnus and immediately put her bitchface on. Magnus knew that meant it was some random and she was pissed that he interrupted their moment. He turned around and looked up to see a middle aged man in a thoroughly untailored suit that was the most hideous gray/blue color. It washed out his complexion, made his brown hair look even duller than it already was, and also made him look a little like a hobbit. Yet, he had a kind face, so Magnus made the split second decision to speak first and spare him whatever rambling rant Camille was about to burst forth.

"Can I help you?" he asked cordially, but still putting on the air of impatience.

"Hello, my name is Curtis Whitlow," the man said as he held a hand out to Magnus. Magnus stared at it for a second too long before sliding his own hand into the grasp, and receiving a firm handshake before being let go. "I was here in the New York visiting with my daughter and she dragged me to this place because she said I might find something fresh. She was absolutely right." He was practically beaming.

"Oh? How nice for you," Camille began. She was obviously annoyed at their intruder.

"I'm sorry, forgive me for interrupting," the man said sincerely. "It's just that I couldn't help but be utterly moved by your performance. Do you write or record professionally?" he asked.

"Uh, no," Magnus said, confused.

"Good," the man said. At Magnus and Camille's confused looks, he continued. "I only mean to say that I'm glad someone else hasn't snatched you up already, though I can't for the life of me figure out why, unless no one has ever heard you sing before," he said. Magnus flinched as he hit the nail on the head. But the man didn't need to know his insecurities.

"It would be really nice if you'd just spit out whatever the hell your point is," Camille snapped. Magnus put a hand on her knee and squeezed. She huffed, but shut her mouth.

The man reached into his coat pocket and handed Magnus a card. "I would like you to come out to the studio and audition for us. Your voice is absolutely amazing, and it seems you have some writing chops as well. The label needs fresh new faces like you, and you have just enough quirk to set you apart. Not that you'll need it, once you open your mouth. We could give you a very promising deal if you'll just consider it." Magnus just sat there looking at the man like he was an alien wearing a fedora and speaking Enochian. He was sure he looked like an utter idiot. Behind him, Camille had lost her voice. "Just give me a call if you decide one way or the other. We'd love to have you, and you'd be a tremendous asset." Satisfied with his pitch, Curtis Whitlow gave both of them a small wave goodbye and exited the club with a girl about their age, which they assumed was his daughter.

Magnus turned back to Camille, only to discover that her face was completely unreadable. "What the hell just happened?" she asked.

"I think he liked me, but I'm not sure," Magnus said, puzzled.

"Magnus Bane, that man just offered you a record deal. A MOTHERFUCKING. RECORD. DEAL."

Magnus looked at his friend like she was insane. She just looked back at him expectantly, waiting for it to hit him. He wasn't really sure it would any time soon.

"Magnus, oh my god. See? Okay, when you get ridiculously famous, just remember I'm the one who kicked you in the nads and made you come here. Just, remember that okay?"

"Camille, this isn't that big of a deal. I mean, we don't even know where he's from. His 'studio' could be in some rundown back alley in Greenspoint. We don't fucking know."

"Well, for one thing, IT IS THAT BIG OF A DEAL. Two, you're fucking going, like, tomorrow, because you can't pass this shit up. And three, you could find out if you looked at the fucking card," she snapped. Before he could do as she instructed, she snatched it away from him and looked it over. Her face grew paler by the second, and she seemed to have lost her voice again. She held it out to him again, and he glanced it over. He was sure his face mirrored hers completely.

_Mr. Curtis Whitlow_

_Producer, Capitol Records_

_1750 North Vine Street_

_Los Angeles, CA 90028_

He looked about seven hundred times over the first two lines. Capitol Records. Capitol motherfucking Records. His eyes stayed trained on that for a good 10 minutes. Then, he thought about something. His eyes scanned down the card, and his heart stopped.

Los Angeles, CA.

Los Angeles.

_LA._

As in _Land of Alec. _

Fucking hell.


	35. Chapter 35

Alec was ecstatic. Today was the first day since he'd come home that he was able to venture out. The doctor had told him to stay off his foot for a while, but now the opposite was in effect. He was to work it out as much as he could, until he got tired, then he was to rest it until the next day. But every day, he was supposed to either drive (working his foot on the pedals was a great workout), or do some walking. He wasn't allowed to jog yet, but that would come soon. He couldn't wait to actually get back to practice. Sometimes, he stopped himself short when he thought of that, thinking that maybe the other guys wouldn't want him around, based on recent events. But then again, he trusted Donovan with everything he had. Donovan said that none of them hated him, or were disgusted with him, or anything. There were a couple that were a little uncomfortable with it, but that was their prerogative. This wasn't a perfect world. The truth was, though, that none of them would ever act on it. They were a respectful lot, a team. They all understood that as soon as one or two relationships between a few of them faltered, the balance of the whole team was thrown off. Alec knew in his heart that even if a few of them disagreed with his sexuality, they would never bring it up on the field or in the locker room.

Still, he was a little apprehensive. He had a few more weeks until the doctor would clear him to actually practice, so he chose to put his fears aside for the time being. He was currently sitting behind the wheel of his precious Aston Martin DB9, just simply feeling the taut leather that wrapped the wheel. He was just soaking up the feeling and the smells and the sheer controlled adrenaline that the car afforded. He'd missed his baby, his confidant. He hadn't been in this car in so long, but this felt like coming home. He gingerly inserted the key in the ignition, turned, and almost moaned as she purred to life beneath him.

"Baby, I missed you so much. I haven't really had time for you at all since I got back from New York, and I feel like you don't know me. I've changed a lot. Like, a lot. But youâ€¦you always stay the same. You're always here when I come back. Thanks for being the one literal constant in my life. I've been kind of lost the last few weeks."

He reached over to turn on the radio, and one of his favorite songs by the Foo Fighters was on. He turned it up full blast, right there in his tiny garage. He backed out slowly onto the sidestreet his driveway opened onto. He gently pulled to the corner, where the side street met the main road, pausing to let the traffic pass. It was still a quiet road, well away from the hustle of Hollywood, so there were rarely cops. He waited until he had an ample window and pulled out to the left slowly. Once he was straightened up onto the road, he barely tapped the pedal, and the car shot to life. He roared down the deserted street, picking up speed until he was well over 90 miles per hour. He opened the window and let the wind whip his face and he felt alive for the first time since he'd told Magnus he loved him.

He raced down to Hollywood, cruised the boulevard for a bit, but grew tired of the speed restrictions that pedestrians called for. He worked his way up into the hills, gaining speed again until he reached the top. He slowed down and parked at a tourist lookout spot, overlooking the Valley. He had to admit, LA much better suited his personality than New York. He'd grown up in Manhattan, and he'd never felt at home in all the hustle and bustle and concrete. Everyone passed you by and you never really got to know anyone. Not that he ever got to know many people passing on the street here, but they seemed to have histories and personalities, whereas people in New York only seemed to have purpose. They went from point A to point B without fail, without stopping. LA just seemed more carefree and ambitious. As soon as he'd moved out here at 21, he'd felt more at home than he ever had at the Lightwood mansion.

He looked out over his hometown, leaning on the hood of the car. He was all alone, but he didn't feel abandoned. He felt solitary and comfortable. He caught himself, though, imagining Magnus sitting behind him, and Alec leaning into his chest, with Magnus' arms wrapped around his shoulders. The visual suddenly wrenched his heart. He hadn't really allowed himself to think of Magnus since Donovan's visit, but the whole of him came back in a rush. His beauty, his charisma, his unfailing kindness and patience. The way he was willing to take it all at Alec's pace, because he was the new one. The way he traveled across the entire country at the drop of a hat for Alec in his time of need. And Alec had thrown it all away because of fear of the unknown.

"I'm so fucked up," he said out loud, talking to the car. "Why is it that every time I find something worthwhile and happy, I have to go and drag it through the fucking mud? I know this sounds ridiculous and cheesy, but Magnus was the best thing that happened to me ever. Seriously. He's an amazing human being, completely devoted to some douchebag like me, and I went and fucking blew it! Fuck!" he screamed out to the Valley, hearing his anguished voice echo off the hills surrounding him. That's when he started to let the tears fall. "I'm a fucking failure. God! I hate my fucking fear of everything!" He started kicking the dirt around with gusto. "I'm 23 fucking years old! Why am I afraid of myself? Answer me that! Can I please just, for once in my life, be the strong one? The one who stares fear in the face and says fuck you? I want to be that guy. And I want him back so, so bad." He hung his head, listening to his words reverberate inside his mind over and over. He'd come to terms with the fact that he should apologize, and hopefully Magnus would take him back, although he doubted it. But he didn't want to do something like this over the phone. He wanted to look Magnus in the eyes and tell him. He wanted to tell him how much of an ass he was and how much he still loved him and did Magnus still love _him_ and would he please take him back? Alec seriously doubted it, but it was always worth a shot. There was only one problem: Alec hadn't been cleared to fly yet. He couldn't go to New York for another two weeks or so. Could he stand going two more weeks without hearing Magnus' smooth, sweet voice? He would have to. Magnus would never answer his phone if he knew it was Alec calling. He'd just have to wait it out. And be in fucking agony in the process.

Over the course of the next week, the third week of his new single life, Alec steadily grew stronger. He was getting around much easier, and driving no longer hurt his tendon too much. He could go for longer joy rides, and this made life a little easier to bear considering he couldn't really do anything else. At the end of the week, he attended practice for the first time since the accident (he sat on the bench the entire time, of course). The guys welcomed him back with open arms. No one mentioned Alec's "outing", but it didn't seem like an awkwardly avoided topic. It seemed like they were treating it as his business, and they would leave it off the field. Alec couldn't have been more pleased. Really, he was regaining his happiness all around and the only thing ruining it was the absence of Magnus in his life. On that front, he was slowly dying inside, and it was horrible. Each day got a little harder, a little longer, a little lonelier. But he persevered, choosing to look to the bright day when he could see Magnus in New York again. He _would_ see him again, he was going to make sure. And even if Magnus yelled at him and threw him out, which was nothing less than he deserved, he'd be okay knowing that he'd tried and he'd given his utmost. He looked forward to the doctor clearing him to fly.

Little did he know.

* * *

**Song for this section: Starlight by Muse (FUCKING. AWESOME. SONG. And I just like it hehe)**

"Okay, you're going to have to wipe that fucking expression away before I lay one on you and you squeal like a girl."

Camille kept on smiling smugly. "I am a girl, and honestly I've fantasized about kissing you. So you're going to have to come up with a way better threat than that," she replied.

Magnus was sidetracked for a second. "You've _fantasized_ about kissing me? Since when do you fantasize about anything without going out and fucking making it happen?" he asked.

She seemed to think for a moment, contemplating. "You're right." She then proceeded to pin her tall best friend against the bar, crushing her lips to his. Her hands went to his soft hair, pulling at it slightly. He moaned in the back of his throat, opening his mouth to her tongue's prodding. She pressed herself up against him harder, causing him to lean backwards over the bar counter, his hands pulling at her back. When she felt she'd had her fill, she released him, pulling him upright and rubbing her thumb down her chin, wiping away the bit of his lip gloss that had lingered. "Well fuck me, that was better than I thought it would be."

"TouchÃ©," he returned.

"But let's never do it again okay? Because the weirdness is already sinking in with every second I look you in the eye," she quipped, turning back to Katinka. "How did you actually fuck him? Isn't it awkward as hell?"

"I have the innate ability to fuck my friends and have it not affect our everyday relationship. This comes in particular handy when you've fucked your boss," Katinka said as she polished a shot glass and smiled to herself.

"Have you fucked many of your bosses?" Magnus asked.

"Do you want me to answer that?" Katinka returned.

"Point taken," he said. It was nearing 4pm, and Katinka and the rest of the staff were showing up to get Cherry Bomb in shape for opening that night. The three of them were just standing around shooting the shit, killing time before Magnus' flight. He still wasn't entirely sure why he was doing this, considering the consequences if he ran into Alec at all over there. He'd rather liked having Alec on the other end of the country, where Magnus didn't have the chance to run into him or look at him or be assaulted by those gorgeous blue eyes. He knew he wouldn't be able to take it, at least not right after their breakup. He'd steadily built up his reserves of resentment, though, which would hopefully pay off while he was in LA. He didn't want to accidentally come across Alec on the street or something and not be able to control the urge to jump into his arms. He wanted to be able to give him a fucking pissed off look and walk away. Magnus was juvenile when it came to these things, but it was how he kept up his faÃ§ade of confidence in situations like this. He'd had his crying sessions, his pouting phase, and he was over it now. He told himself if he saw Alec, he'd just give him the stink eye and walk the other way. There was no way in hell Alec would actually approach him in public, not after this whole thing and what Magnus had learned about his terror at being found out. No way in hell.

"Well, you better get going, I guess," Camille said, putting on a pouty expression. He knew he'd miss her the most. He'd feel utterly alone in LA without his constant confidante. He always felt better when she was by his side, even if it was just to give him the occasional kick in the proverbial nads that he so desperately needed most of the time. But it was her job to stay here and look after Cherry Bomb. She'd done a good job of it while he'd been with Alec at the hospital, better than he'd anticipated, actually. He felt good leaving his baby in her hands. But she was right; his flight was leaving in two hours, and he needed to get to La Guardia and through security first. Also, he was going to have to check most of the 7 bags he was bringing for his one week trip, so that required ample time.

"Yeah, I guess. Come'ere beautiful," he said, wrapping Camille up in a hug and squeezing her tight. She squeezed back just as much, and they stayed that way for a good while. It wasn't like this when he was off to take care of Alec. He knew he'd be coming back eventually, but this trip seemed different. Somehow, it seemed like if things went well, he'd be stuck there a lot longer than he'd planned. They had mentioned over the phone that once he was established with the label, they could set up some recording time back in New York, but for the most part he'd be working in LA. This week long trip was just to finalize everything, and for the record company to make sure they wanted him for real. He was going to audition in front of 22 executives, and hopefully they'd like him. But a small, miniscule part of him kind of hoped they didn't. That way, he could say he tried, that he wasn't good enough, and that he should just come back and stick to what he knew: running Cherry Bomb. It was his pastime, and he'd gotten used to life without music.

But then again, he'd brought her back. The number one thing in his life he always strived to hold on to, and he'd finally gotten it back. His mother was somewhere, watching over him, and cheering for him. He knew she was; she was that obnoxious choir mom always, and he loved her for it. He couldn't bring himself to just _not try_, considering she was counting on him. This was just as much her dream as it had been his. He couldn't screw it up.

When Camille finally released him, he leaned over the bar and gave Katinka a peck on the cheek. Camille walked him to the door, where she hugged him one more time. He smiled and got into the waiting cab, watching her like a child leaving his home until she disappeared from view.

The plane ride to LA was just as exhausting as the last time, but this time he wasn't as anxious. This time, he wasn't worrying what the hell was wrong with his boyfriend becauseâ€¦well, he didn't have one anymore. He couldn't help the morose path of his thoughts, and he was growing tired of them, so he decided to try and get some sleep. It ended up being a shorter flight without layovers. He walked through the terminal, not surprised at the amount of travelers in LAX at midnight on a Saturday. He huffed his way out to hail a cab, directing him to the hotel on the email from Curtis Whitlow. He'd told them he had more than enough money to pay for his own hotel, but the man had insisted. It was apparently policy when they picked someone up like this. Magnus guessed the limos and butlers came laterâ€¦

Monday morning at 9am, Magnus awoke feeling refreshed after having slept most of the day Sunday. He'd recuperated from his flight and he was ready to give his best performance in front of 22 scary-ass old men. Those scary-ass old men would decide what direction his life would take from now on. When Magnus thought about it, it made him slightly nervous, so he pushed the thought away, without much success.

This morning, there was a limo waiting to take him across town to the historic Capitol Records building. As they pulled up in front, Magnus took a deep, calming breath and slid out of the back seat. He could do this. He'd never really been incredibly nervous before, so he tried to tell himself he was just giving another concert like he'd done millions of times for his mother, or school, or Camille lately.

When he walked into the room, it was a lot less formal than he'd thought it would be. The scary-ass old men were actually closer to middle aged surfer looking guys, each with a stack of papers clutched in their hands. They were leaning over tables or sitting backwards on chairs talking amongst themselves, He recognized Curtis Whitlow, but this time he was dressed in a t-shirt and faded jeans that Magnus couldn't decide whether they made him look older or younger. He looked up as Magnus entered the room, and came up to shake his hand.

"Nothing to worry about here, Mr. Bane. We're all excited to hear you. I told them what I witnessed in New York, and they said if you can give us half of that, they'd be pleased," he said with a smile. Then he turned to the room, "Our guest of honor has arrived," he announced, motioning Magnus to the center of the room. They all turned to face him with expectant looks on their faces.

"Hello," he said to the room, not looking any one of them in the face. He was all of a sudden terrified to the bone. These men were going to decide his life. He couldn't push the thought away this time. His hands started shaking and he chastised himself for being so weak. This was what he'd done with his life until his mother died, why couldn't he just pick up where he left off? He tried to imagine her sitting amongst the group. It was vague, but she was there. He took a deep breath. "Uh, just tell me when you're ready, I guess," he said. He didn't really know how these things went.

"Whenever you're ready, Mr. Bane," one of the men said. He looked nice, but that could be deceiving. He could not even want to be here right now. Magnus tried not to think about it.

"Okay, uh. Okay." He took one last, calming breath, and opened his mouth. He sang the first song that came to mind, because he'd always thought he was best when he worked on his toes. He gave a very nice a capella rendition of Joan Jett's edition of Crimson and Clover. Halfway through the second half of the first verse, however, Curtis held up his hand.

"That's very good, Mr. Bane, but I was hoping to hear another original. What you sang that night at the club was inspiring, and very heartfelt. You have an amazing voice and range, and that can carry you through a lot, but what I absolutely loved about your performance was that I _felt_ what you felt. The entire room did. I don't want to know what Joan Jett feels, I want to know what _you_ feel. Do you have anything in mind that you've written?"

Magnus thought for a moment. What ran through his head was a piece that was never supposed to see the light of day. In his opinion it was whiney and mopey and just plain jealous ex-boyfriend material. But it was feeling they wanted, and mopey and whiney _were_ feelingsâ€¦What the hell.

"Well, I have something I wrote a couple of weeks ago, but it's not very refined. I just kind of sat down and did it one day because I couldn't hold it in anymore."

"That is _exactly_ what we want, son. Show us the real you, okay?" one of the men said.

"Alright," Magnus sighed. He walked to the corner of the room and seated himself at the baby grand. He picked up the cover and stared at the keys a moment. "I'm sorry if this sounds too whiney. I personally think it sounds a little juvenile or whatever, butâ€”"

"Magnus," Curtis interrupted him. "Stop second guessing yourself. Shut up and sing," he said with a smile.

"Okay," Magnus replied. He placed his fingers down on the keys, trying out the chords a few times before he began. Then, he sang the song he wrote the week after he found himself alone due to Alec's fear of the unknown. He felt it was so unfair for Magnus to take the brunt of the hurt in the situation, and he'd sat at his piano and cried like a baby, just pouring out the words to this piece. He'd never even written anything down. His emotions were so piled up at that moment in time that he had an unconscious memory of the entire thing.

When he got to the bridge, where it was just a progression of four chords and the same phrase repeated over and over, he forgot the rest of the room. He let the tears fall because this was the part he poured his soul into. It was meant for only one person in the entire world. By the time he made it back to the last repetition of the chorus, his voice was getting gritty and rough with tears. He cursed himself again for being weak. But there was nothing for it now. The song was over. The room came rushing back and he opened his eyes to stare around the room.

He wasn't sure how to take in what he saw. Half the room had their eyes closed. The other half was staring with blank faces. One or two swiped at their faces, trying to look inconspicuous. He instinctively looked to Curtis, who seemed to be the head of the household here. He raised an eyebrow in anticipation of the man's response.

Curtis remained silent for a moment, looking around the room. He waited until everyone had opened their eyes and their attention was focused on him. There were a few looks cast this way and that among them, and Magnus began to grow more nervous. Had they really hated it that bad that they couldn't even bring themselves to comment?

After a few moments, about half the room left. Magnus waited while Curtis conferred with those that were left. Then, they turned to him, and he swallowed loudly. He hadn't known how much this meant to him until this moment. He'd poured his heart and soul out for this group of high brow strangers, and they were about to deliver the verdict.

"I have a question, Magnus," Curtis began. "What about that song struck you as juvenile, or whiney?" He had a serious look on his face.

"Well, I justâ€¦I wrote it when I was going through a breakup. I just sat there and cried and whined out loud, and this song kind of just came out. I felt like a whiney teenager the whole time."

"Magnus, what you just didâ€¦that wasâ€¦" he stopped, seeming at a loss for words. "Well, we have a proposition for you."

Magnus cocked an eyebrow. This was not the response he had anticipated, if he'd thought to anticipate any one in particular. "Okay?"

"Can you do that, what you just did, at the White Bar on Thursday night? If you leave that crowd as speechless and awed as you just left us, then we will hand over the pen to you that night. The contract is typed up and ready; you just have to prove to us that you won't clam up in front of a crowd. Also, we just want to see what the scene thinks of you. Honestly though, if you even utter one note that night, you can consider yourself a part of the Capitol family." He held out a hand and Magnus took it, without really knowing what he was doing but it felt so damn good, he didn't even care. After he got over the initial shock, he couldn't wipe the smile off his face for the rest of the day. As soon as he walked out the door of the office, he whipped out his cell phone and called Camille, just like a teenage girl that just got asked to the prom.


	36. Chapter 36

Magnus was out on Wednesday, shopping for his LA debut the next night. He hit Rodeo Drive, but didn't really find anything that screamed 'Magnus'. He decided to hit the more indie shops and even the mainstream stuff at Hollywood and Highland. He was going for likeable, yet eclectic. He felt very odd not having his best friend beside him (most likely to tell him what a sellout he was for buying jeans at Lucky), and he missed her a lot. He called her several times during the day to ask her opinion on a top or pair of pants that he would twitpic to her. She usually had the normal snide things to say about the mainstream stuff, but for the most part she approved of his choices.

"Magnus, you're gonna rock the house, okay? Seriously, just be yourself and everything will work out fine."

"Hey, the Disney channel called. They want their lame clichÃ© life lessons back."

"Shut up, bitchface. You know I speak the truth," Camille shot back.

"Oh yes. You're like a bleach blonde Yoda with giant knockers. The picture of credibility," Magnus replied as he slid his Black Card across the counter so the clerk could ring up his $2,438 purchase. Okay, so he wasn't just shopping for tomorrow night.

"Look, I was just trying to be supportive. I say something nice and all I get in return is weak sarcasm. I can't even battle with this," she said.

"I know, babe. I appreciate it, I really do. I guess I'm just nervous."

"You shouldn't be. I'm surprised people can stand in your presence when you let those pipes open up. It's like a shower of fucking amazement. It's like angels, likeâ€”"

"Okay, once you start comparing me to messengers of the lord you begin to lose your effectiveness, not to mention whatever shred of credibility you had," Magnus said, but he was smiling. "Look, I know I'll do my best. That's all I can give."

"What song are you going to sing?" she asked.

"That one I wrote the week after," he said. She knew what he meant by the "after".

"You sure you can get through that in front of a crowd? I mean, you can't sing anything else? What about Big White Room? They liked that one too," she said.

He sighed. "Yeah, but I sang this one on Monday and they specifically requested it for Thursday. I'm kind of stuck," he replied.

"Whatever. They'd still sign you if you sang Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, but I guess pleasing them to the fullest extent doesn't hurt. I just hope you don't choke in the middle of it."

"Such encouraging words, Camille. Thank you, but I think I'll manage," Magnus said. He was gathering up his bags from the cashier and turning to go. All of a sudden, he nearly dropped all his bags; his phone slid out of the crook of his neck and shoulder, and he had to drop a few bags to catch it in time. "Shit!" he whisper-yelled.

"What's the matter?" Camille was saying, but Magnus paid her no mind, as he was attempting to squeeze himself between a mannequin and a display of ugly peasant tops, standing stock still and trying not to breathe. He didn't answer her as she continued to yell at him through the phone. He finally reached up and pressed the End button to shut her up. He froze at the sound of a familiar voice.

"Look, I'm just trying to get you to lighten up a little. You need to learn to express yourself in more things than just faded black t-shirts and holey jeans. What happened to all that stuff we bought in New York?" Isabelle Lightwood stood at a rack of sleek button down dress shirts, running her fingers over each one, finally picking up navy blue one and turning around. She held it up against her companion's chest, studying the look before throwing it over her arm and moving on to the next rack, chattering away incessantly.

Magnus was struck so hard by the way the shirt set off Alec's blue eyes and his soft, pale skin that he couldn't breathe. He had no idea the sight of Alec in the flesh would hit him with this much force. He tried to get his heart to beat at a normal pace again, tried to control his lungs and get them to function properly. Alec stood a little slumped over, looking worn out and tired. He was in a walking cast, a giant plastic thing that looked quite uncomfortable to even have on, much less walk in. They had probably been all up and down the boulevard already, considering the exhausted set of his shoulders. But Magnus had to admit he looked happy to be outside. The poor thing had been cooped up for so long, and he was athletic by nature. He needed to be out in the sunlight exercising and playing like a child. Magnus wanted to go up and hug him and congratulate him on being able to get around so much better than the last time he saw him.

But he stopped that train of thought cold. No. All of a sudden, all that pent up resentment for what Alec did to his heart came back. He was abruptly so angry with Alec he wanted to scream. How could he do this to Magnus? How could he kick him to the curb without a thought? How could he stand there so nonchalantly? How could he stand there and be so beautiful and sexy and needy looking? How could he bring out that one dimple when Isabelle said something snide about Jace that made him laugh? How could he be so fucking perfect?

And just like that, he found himself pining and lusting after Alec with all the force of the first time. But this time, it made him so goddamn angry that he felt like throwing things. He was not a weak person, except when it came to Alec. This was ridiculous. He _knew_ Alec lived here. What did he think, he was just going to have the run of the city without ever running into his ex? He saw his chance, as Isabelle led Alec to the back of the store, presumably to try on things. He was _not _going to be in the same room with a naked Alec. A naked, sexy, dripping wet with sweat, moaning, grippingâ€¦FUCK. He straightened up, took a deep breath, and attempted to walk out of the store with as much dignity as he could muster, considering the store clerk had seen his whole display. He strolled out nonchalantly (hopefully), and turned the corner, ducking into Sephora. If Isabelle brought Alec in here, well, he would think of a plan when things became that desperate.

He stood in the perfume section and berated himself for his utter lack of cool when it came to Alec. When they were together, it was okay because he was allowed to swoon at the drop of a hat when Alec did something adorable, like blushing. Or when he did something innately sexy, like biting on his lower lip. Magnus had to close his eyes and take a deep breath at that image. That had always been his undoing.

As he walked around the oversized makeup store, he contemplated the implications of his behavior. Well, this definitely meant he wasn't over Alec, but then again he'd kind of deluded himself into thinking that in the first place. He didn't think he'd be over Alec in the span of a few weeks, and this proved it. His emotions ran wild in his mind; his resentment, his anger, his devotion, his caring complex for those in need. He just saw Alec as this delicate canary that was to be cooed to and nurtured. Well, on the emotional level at least. But what about Magnus' emotions? Who cared for those? Did Alec? Apparently not. He'd even stopped calling, and Magnus just figured he had given up.

He ended up buying some Dior eyeshadow that went extremely well with his planned outfit for the next night, and he considered the day a triumph. He attempted to put thoughts of Alec out of his mind until he was sitting at the piano at the White Bar. He'd use his situation for gain, and that would be the end of it. He could move on. Maybe.

* * *

**Song for this section: One and Only by Adele (This is Magnus' song that he "wrote". In this context, it makes me want to sob my eyes out. It's from Magnus' ripped up heart, and he means every word.)**

Isabelle was only visiting for the week, so she had insisted on soaking up as much brotherly time as she could. She was obviously glad that Alec was able to traipse around about town, and she was taking full advantage. Alec guessed it was okay considering he was supposed to be exercising, but he was under the impression that exercise meant driving his car, walking up and down his street, and occasionally helping out at practice; he definitely did not factor in a full day's worth of shopping. Yesterday, they'd gone to every single store in Los Angeles. Or at least it seemed like that to Alec. They only sat down when they were in the back of a cab en route to the next shop, and most of the time- like on the boulevard- they just walked. His foot was getting stronger, his tendon not hurting as much. He was exhausted from the physical exertion, being that he hadn't had much physical activity since the accident. He was horribly out of shape, and he was paying for it.

Isabelle had gotten him some kick-ass clothes, though. Tonight was her last full night in town before heading to Miami to do a BCBG shoot, so she had insisted they have a night out as brother and sister. Simon had told her about this nice little bar that showcased new singer/songwriters, and she was so excited to go that Alec couldn't bring himself to tell her that he didn't really feel like going out and having fun. Anyway, it'd give him an excuse to wear his new blue dress shirt that he'd kind of fallen in love with. It was navy and had little tiny black embroidered tribal designs that ran over his shoulder and down one side of his back. His new jeans also covered up his stupid walking cast, while simultaneously making his ass look rather nice. He scolded himself for being so superficial, but he couldn't help internally thanking Isabelle for making him look and feel attractive after the exhaustion and weakness he'd endured for the past week. He felt so flabby and out of shape that it was nice to feel somewhat sexy.

As he stood leaning against the back of the couch in his apartment, Isabelle came strolling out of his bedroom. She looked amazing in her white jersey knit wrap dress. She was always the picture of beauty, but it was when she radiated confidence that she truly took on glow-quality. Alec was forever envious of her sureness of herself.

"Ready, my lady?" he asked, putting out an elbow in an old-fashioned manner.

"Why, yes my lord," she returned, slipping her arm into his and laughing. He leaned over and kissed the top of her head, and they walked out and down to the waiting cab. The ride over was spent talking about Jace's new movie, which was a romantic comedy. Usually, Jace didn't take things like that, but Isabelle and his manager had both suggested he show his emotional side for once instead of constantly going on screen and kicking-ass for two solid hours. Alec sort of agreed. They'd long since discussed the whole E! News thing and the breakup. Isabelle was of a mind to force Alec and Magnus back together, but she agreed that Magnus would probably loath to take her brother back after what he'd said. She said it might take a long while for Magnus to be able to forgive him, but that it would eventually happen. She'd seen them together, and in the leaked pictures, and she _knew_ they were made for each other. Alec agreed on the inside, but on the outside he'd just kept telling her it was never going to be okay, but that he'd try when he got a chance to go back to New York.

They pulled up in front of a small faÃ§ade set between a closed flower shop and a bustling bistro. The door was painted stark white and the line went around the corner. Apparently the White Bar was a popular place that had slipped Alec's radar. Then again, Alec didn't know much about hangouts and those kinds of things in LA. He only knew the ones in New York because of his parents and his siblings. He and Isabelle approached the door and the bouncer, seeing who it was, lifted the rope and opened the door for them, ushering them inside. The room was dark and small, with only a few tables and chairs scattered throughout the room; most of the people were either standing or milling about, waiting for the show to start. Alec and Isabelle took a spot in one of the back corners, wanting to avoid being photographed by the paparazzi seated along the front. A small drum set, an electric guitar, and a baby grand piano were crammed on the tiny stage. The piano wasn't white, but the visual it called up was the same. Alec didn't think he'd ever be able to look at a piano the same after he'd made love on top of one. He tried to dispel the image, but it was difficult.

He was distracted by Isabelle squeezing his hand. She'd seen the look on his face and was trying to figure out what it was about. "It's nothing," he said in response to her questioning look. Just then, a few people filed out onto the stage. One went to seat himself behind the drum set while another picked up the guitar and began tuning. The third man, wearing a beat up Led Zeppelin shirt and looking a little like Simon's kind of friend, came to the front of the stage carrying a microphone. The crowd died down at his appearance, and he waited a few more seconds for the guy with the guitar to finish tuning and stand quietly. He smiled and turned back to the rest of the room.

"Hello, everyone and welcome to Virgin Thursday at the White Bar!" The audience clapped. "Every Thursday we bring you the newest and freshest in upcoming talent. We hope you enjoy the show. Tonight, the White Bar is pleased to present prospective Capitol recording artist Magnus Bane. Let's give him a hand!" The audience erupted as a tall, slender, caramel colored man with shining black locks walked shyly out onto the stage. The announcer put the microphone back on its stand that was situated over the piano and exited the stage.

Alec's heart had stopped. He hadn't registered the applause in the room, the startled squeeze of his hand by Isabelle, or his own jaw dropping open. The room was frozen in time, and only Magnus moved. He seemed to walk across the stage in slow motion. Alec took in his tall frame, clad in subtle dark jeans and a gray v-neck. Over that was a black pinstripe vest, framing two or three long necklaces that swayed when he walked. His hair was down and over one eye, making him look mysterious and reclusive, and his walk was a little slumped. Not at all like the Magnus Alec remembered. This Magnus looked shy and sunken in, and Alec couldn't help but berate himself for being the one that made him that way. He'd broken his heart, and there was no taking it back.

"Alec, we can leave if you want to. I'm so sorry, I didn't know he would be in LA, much less _here_," Isabelle said in a whisper. She was tugging on Alec's hand to get him to walk with her out the door discreetly, but he didn't budge. "Alec?"

But Alec was too busy staring. He hadn't heard Magnus' voice in a month, and hadn't seen him in a little longer than that, so he wasn't prepared for the assault that Magnus' beauty dealt him. He was thrust back into the image of them making love on Magnus' white lacquer grand, sliding and slipping in their sweat and mingled bodies. He'd never felt so emotionally connected to a person before, and couldn't help the aching in his gut at the thought of losing such a treasure. He couldn't have moved from his current spot if he tried.

Magnus was now seated on the piano bench, and he moved the microphone in so that it was at the right position for him to reach it. "Uh, hi guys. So, yeah. This is a song I wrote a couple of weeks ago. It's a little rough, but I hope you like it. It comes from a very specific place." Alec was nearly hyperventilating. He was about to listen to Magnus sing. His weakness. He remembered his awe and the rush of emotion that he'd had the first time Magnus graced him with his amazing voice, the way it bounced and echoed off the walls of his penthouse and the way it also scaled back to a tender, longing tone. That voice made up Alec's dreams. Magnus began to play, and Alec (along with Isabelle) was rooted in place.

_You've been on my mind, I grow fonder every day_

_Lose myself in time just thinkin' of your face_

_God only knows why it's taken me so long_

_To let my doubts go_

_You're the only one that I want_

_I don't know why I'm scared, I've been here before_

_Every feeling every word, I've imagined it all_

_You'll never know if you never try to forgive your past_

_And simply be mine_

Magnus' gut-wrenching voice was already echoing throughout the room, causing Alec's heart to pound at every note. And then he got to the chorus and the band joined in, giving the song a bluesy feel that went straight to the heart.

_I dare you to let me be your one and only_

_Promise I'm worthy to hold in your arms_

_So come on and give me a chance_

_To prove I am the one who can_

_Walk that mile until the end starts_

Magnus wasn't crying this time, Alec noticed. He lookedâ€¦angry and broken. Magnus always sang from the heart, and it did nothing but intensify the hurt Alec felt along with him. It felt like the whole room knew Magnus was singing directly to him, even though Magnus didn't even notice he was there.

_Have I been on your mind?_

_You hang on every word I say_

_Lose yourself in time at the mention of my name_

_Will I ever know how it feels to hold you close_

_And have you tell me whichever road I choose you'll go_

_I don't know why I'm scared, I've been here before _

_Every feeling every word, I've imagined it all_

_You'll never know if you never try to forgive your past_

_And simply be mine_

Every time he hit that note on _mine_, he let it crescendo out to envelope the whole room. Then, he sang the chorus again, getting even more gritty and angry. It was like he was yelling at Alec for breaking his heart. Alec felt each note like a blow, bringing him down the way he brought down Magnus' spirit. And then, there was a bridge in which the drummer and the guitarist fell silent and Magnus simply played a progression of three or four chords, repeating the same phrase over and over, searing it straight into Alec standing in the back of the room.

_I know it ain't easy giving up your heart_

_I know it ain't easy giving up your heart_

_I know it ain't easy giving up your heart_

_Nobody's perfect, trust me I've learned it_

_Nobody's perfect, trust me I've learned it_

Then, the drummer and the guitarist started singing back up as Magnus let the music take over and just wailed along with it. Those nonsensical notes that came out of him were the most heart-wrenching Alec had heard. When the song returned to the chorus, Magnus was at his angriest and most emotional yet.

_I dare you to let me be your one and only_

_I promise I'm worthy to hold in your arms_

_So come on and give me the chance _

_To prove I am the one who can_

_Walk that mile until the end starts_

The song ended on a beautiful upward progression and drifted into silence. A millisecond later, the entire room erupted in applause. Those who were in chairs stood up and clapped, and there were whistles coming from every corner of the room. Alec could see as Magnus stood up slowly, smiled, and bowed a little. That little smile, though it looked strained, made Alec's heart burst.

"Alec, you _never_ told me he could sing like that. That wasâ€¦that was incredible," Isabelle said in an awed voice. They were the only two in the entire room not clapping, because they were so stunned, for their own reasons. "Alec? Are you okay?" Alec hadn't even noticed he was crying in front of a bunch of strangers.

"I need to go," he said abruptly. He couldn't be here anymore. It was too much, knowing Magnus was that close and that he couldn't even approach him to tell him what a great job he did, how much he'd blown him away yet again. He felt like he was suffocating, needing to run into those arms and not being able to. He turned on his heel, pulling Isabelle with him. She didn't protest.

"Alec, I'm so sorry. I honestly didn't know he'd be here. Who would have thought he'd even be in LAâ€”"

"It's fine, Izzy. I just want to go home, okay?" He shoved his hands in his pockets as she hailed a cab. It was official. He'd never, ever in his life, get over Magnus Bane. Therefore, he had to get him back.


	37. Chapter 37

Magnus had called Camille right after the show to tell her that the ink was drying on his new contract with Capitol Records. He was sure hearing in his left ear would return eventually, and he was happy for himself for the first time in ages. Even though after everything, singing still made him think of his mother, and that made him sad. Yet, he had learned to think of her in happy ways most of the time. He didn't dwell on the fact that she was gone anymore, just that she would be ecstatic that he'd finally grown a pair, and gotten back in the groove. Look where it had gotten him! He had a contract for three albums in the next four years, and if the first album went at least Gold (which Curtis seemed to think was a tiny hurdle and he would easily go Platinum soon), he was guaranteed at least a US tour, if not an international tour depending on the reception in the mainstream that he received. He couldn't be more ecstatic.

The only thing missing from his life was Alec. He didn't want to admit it to himself, but he couldn't fully bask in his glory without Alec there to hug him, and be proud of him. He missed his sweet blue eyes gazing up at him from below with such sureness that his heart would contract at the sight. He missed those strong athletic arms around his waist, pulling him closer for a small peck on the lips, and always seemed to turn into more. It was really kind of pathetic how attached Magnus had grown in the span of a couple of months. He'd never fallen for someone so fast in his entire life, and it was threatening to bring him under even in this time of absolute joy.

He was currently packing up only one suitcase. The rest of what he brought would stay here, because he was coming back in a couple of days. He was only going home to gather the rest of his stuff so he could bring it back here. The record company had given him a signing bonus, which he used to pay for half the price of a condo in West Hollywood Heights, a block off Sunset (he used his own money to pay the rest of it off). After all, he loved the city, and wanted to be at the center of all things bustling in the nightlife. He wasn't very sure how long he would be staying here, but the record company told him it would be at least a year. They wanted him to write a lot, record, fine tune the album, and then do press with appearances before it came out; along with more press, and promotion afterwards. The album was set to release in about 6 months, so that gave him the other half of the year to promote. Sometimes, he couldn't really believe all of this. It would cross his mind every now and then that he _had an album coming out,_ and it was just a little bit surreal. It seemed like everything was happening so fast.

As he zipped up his purple Chanel luggage, he looked around his empty condo. He'd already been conversing with Camille about decorating, and she'd agreed to come back with him when he returned in a couple of days to help. They'd discussed what would happen to his penthouse in Brooklyn, and since Camille was currently living month to month in her condo (her lease had been up for some time now), they agreed she would move in. His home search in West Hollywood was not without its priorities. Considering Curtis had told him he would most definitely be signed, and be living here for a while he'd done some searching during the week. He'd looked at dozens of condos and penthouses, but found only one that was suitable to him _and_ big enough to fit his Vanderbilt heirloom grand piano. He wasn't sure he could survive anywhere without it, now that he'd finally gotten around to using it. He had Alec to thank for that too. He'd been wondering about shipping it over here, and all of his other precious keepsakes from his mother and her family. However, that would have to wait until he was truly getting settled. Truth be told, he was kind of dreading going to New York for only a couple of days. He was sure he would start missing it even more if he got just one last taste, and then had to leave.

* * *

**Song for this section: With Me by Sum 41 (This song literally inspired this entire chapter. Seriously. It. Is. Amazing.)**

Isabelle was leaving for Miami today, and she had to be at the airport around noon. Alec and his sister had spent the morning watching cartoons, and eating Cheese Nips just like they had when they were kids. It was sometimes surreal when they had moments like these, but it made Alec forget the world for a while. He wished Jace was there, but he was hard at work partyingâ€”learning. Over the years, he'd grown more distant from his brother than his sister, but he guessed he attributed that to his former infatuation. He mostly steered clear. That didn't mean he didn't still love him or protect him; it just meant that Alec's guard was mostly up when Jace was around. However, they'd come to an agreement after the whole outing situation. Basically the terms were "Don't keep secrets," Plain and simple. They were family, and family always looked out for one another; family always knew the real you.

They were currently cleaning up the multitude of dishes that they'd dirtied over the course of the week; they decided they were going to be slobs for a week, considering Jace wasn't around to yell at them about germs and tidiness. But the week had come to an end, and they were adults again. They had, however, been avoiding the subject of the previous night like awkward children. Alec didn't want to talk about it, and Isabelle had simply respected his private thoughts, he could tell she was dying to ask him about it. However, as soon as the thought crossed his mind, she finally did.

"Alec, do you still love him?" Well, that wasn't what he was expecting her to ask.

"Iâ€¦thought that was obvious, consideringâ€¦" he said, referring to his behavior the previous night.

"I was just making sure. In that case, you're the biggest idiot I've ever met. Why didn't you talk to him? How could you not approach him afterâ€¦that?" He could tell she was still in awe of Magnus' musical prowess. Who wouldn't be? "Is it because you're still freaked out about people knowing?"

"That's a big part of it. I mean, I hate to say that even if we were together, I probably wouldn't make a big show of things. But we aren't, and that served to shoot that horse in the face. I couldn't approach him. He hates me, and he would just ignore me anyway. I would too, if I was in his shoes. He'd assume it's what I wanted considering how I treated him," said Alec, hanging his head while washing a bowl in the sink.

"Were you even in the same room as me last night? You know _damn_ well who that song was about. Quit acting like you don't," Isabelle retorted, and he could see she was growing impatient with him. "Alec, Magnus has an ability. It's the ability to project his emotions onto his audience, and that's exactly what he did last night. Everyone in that room, if they knew the truth, would be pissed at you for breaking his heart. Because that's all I felt, Alec. Seriously."

"Isabelle, I can't just parade myâ€¦condition around for everyone to see. I just can't!"

"Alexander Lightwood, it's not a fucking disease. You're gay!" He winced as she yelled it out to the living room. "Get over it! You have someone who loves you despite your asshole-ness, who is clearly _still_ in love with you after you fucking ripped out his heart and stomped on it andâ€¦DON'T GIVE ME THAT PATRONIZING LOOK, ALEC." Uh oh, she was in bitch mode now. Alec put down the glass he was cleaning, and went into the living room to sit on the couch. He put his head in his hands, and she seemed to shut up after he'd shown his defeat in the argument.

"I justâ€¦you have no idea the complex I have about this. I'm an athlete, for one. And yes, I know they said they're okay with it. But having fought against letting it out for 23 years, it's not something I can just stop doing. It's in my nature to hide who I am, plain and simple. You're going to have to accept the fact that I just can't be Mr. Gay Pride Parade all the time."

"But Alecâ€¦okay, let's put aside the Magnus situation for a moment. You're right, you _are_ an athlete. You play for an internationally recognized team. You also break the stereotype," she began.

"What do you mean, 'break the stereotype'?"

"I mean that you half the time, you can't dress for shit. You play sports and love getting your hands dirty. You're a fucking slob sometimes. You live off adrenaline, and you talk to your car for god's sake. You're overtly masculine in every sense of the word."

"What's that got to do with anything?" he asked, not sure whether he should be offended or confused.

"What I'm saying is, breaking the stereotype is a good thing. Think of your visibility, Alec. You are a celebrity, whether you like it or not. And being an out gay athlete, that's something you don't get to see every day. Think about the other kids like you, who live in fear every fucking day of coming out because they think it'll hurt their chances or they're just plain scared of being themselves. You have the ability to show them that it's okay. Once you discover that _yourself_, you have the rare chance that not everybody has: being a role model for kids who live in fear and hiding. I'm talking about athletes in particular here, because everyone thinks that gay guys have to be fucking girly and feminine. That's not true. You prove that. And you could do a shitload of good if you put that on display for all the rest of the kids like you in the world."

Alec just sat, and stared at his sister. She was amazing when she was passionate about something, and it showed in her flushed cheeks and heaving chest when she was done with her speech. She was looking at him like she wanted an answer to her logic. He didn't really have one.

"Isabelle, I understand what you're saying. I justâ€¦I don't know. Don't you think I should get my own life in order before I go influencing everyone else's?"

"Yes, I think you should," she answered firmly, without elaboration. He knew what she meant.

"Well, maybe I'll call him later. I justâ€¦I have to figure out what to say to him. I'm afraid he'll pick up, and I won't say anything. Or maybe he won't even answer, which is more likely."

"The best advice I can give you is to go with your gut. Whatever you do, don't think. Just do. Okay?" She sat down on the couch and wrapped her arms around him, kissing him on the cheek. "I love you, no matter what, got that? I'll always be here to kick you in the ass when you need it."

"I appreciate that, Izzy," he replied with a chuckle. He glanced down at his watch. "Shit, your flight leaves in like 2 hours. We gotta go."

They released each other reluctantly, Alec getting off the couch, and bending to pick up two of Isabelle's bags that were by the door. "You got everything else?" he called to her as she retrieved her purse, and another suitcase from his bedroom.

"Yeah, I think this is it," she said as she came out. He held the door for her, and they went down the hallway to the elevator, down to the street. They gingerly placed her bags into the trunk of Alec's precious car, and climbed in. The radio was on, but neither listened nor talked, each alone with their thoughts.

When they arrived at LAX, Alec pulled the car into the unloading lane next to the terminal door. It was nearly noon, and the entire place was swarming with people coming and going. Izzy would be lucky to get through security and check her bags in time. Alec pulled her bags out of the trunk, setting them on the cement, and took her in for one last quick hug. They'd done this a lot in their careers, considering Alec's brother and sister were kind of in jet-setter occupations. He didn't feel too low about letting her go this time, since he knew he'd see her again soon. He held her close and kissed the top of her head, and she squeezed him back.

* * *

"I love you," Isabelle said into her brother's shoulder.

"Love you, too, munchkin," he replied, and she playfully punched him in the ribs. When they let go, she smiled at him. Then, she grabbed her bags, and turned to make her way through the sliding doors into the bustling airport. She absolutely hated LAX, because it seemed to be the busiest airport she'd ever encountered. Luckily, she noticed that the line to check her bags wasn't too terribly long. She might make it in time yet. She hurried into the line, setting her bags on the floor and digging out her boarding pass to check the time. Her flight was leaving for Miami at 1:45, so she had a little time to get through security and maybe actually grab a latte. She could _not_ function on a flight without a latte.

As she was shoving her boarding pass back in her purse, she glanced up and across the terminal. She saw, about 50 feet away, a familiar tall slender frame. Onyx locks shined in the glaring fluorescent lights, and when he turned around her suspicions were confirmed. He was standing near the end of the security line, holding the handle of a purple Chanel suitcase, and glancing at his cell phone. He looked utterly defeated, and not at all the bright glittery club owner she'd remembered him as. She doubted it was from lack of sleep. She whipped out her cell phone as fast as she could, hoping Alec hadn't driven away yet. The place was crawling with people, and with luck traffic in the unloading lane was frozen as usual.

* * *

Alec was sitting in the driver's seat, impatiently waiting for the old couple three cars in front of him to get a move on so the rest of them could get out of the airport unloading area. He always hated LAX when it was crowded like this, which was pretty much all the time. His cell phone buzzed in the passenger seat, and when he looked down he noticed it was a text from Isabelle. He hoped she hadn't forgotten something in the car.

_He's here. Now's your chance, Alec. _

He stared at the phone for a second, not quite understanding. Then he got another message.

_Remember what I said. Don't think. Just do. Security line._

He held the phone tight and closed his eyes, his breathing picking up. The place was full of people, and this was LAX, so it was also full of paparazzi. There was no way to avoid it. Butâ€¦

He stopped his train of thought. He took her advice, and opened the car door. He left it running, the keys in the ignition. Someone could steal it, but at the moment he didn't care. He was still in his plastic walking cast, but he was learning to get around in it. He'd never actually run with it on, but he was about to test his agility. He was decidedly slower than usual, but he still moved quickly. He raced through the sliding doors, and into the terminal. It was absolutely packed. Somehow, the thought just didn't faze him at the moment. He pushed his way through the throngs of people waiting to check bags, and bolted across the large waiting area. He stopped searched around the faces of the people waiting at security. He was growing desperate, breathing hard, and already sweating with exertion. His tendon was screaming, but he didn't care.

Suddenly, the world stopped.

"Magnus!" he shouted across the 100 feet between him, and the most beautiful man in the world. Every single face within hearing distance turned to him. But all he cared about were those perfect almond shaped eyes that were now staring at him like he was some kind of fallen angel. A fallen angel that had lost his fucking mind. "Magnus!" he shouted again, for good measure.

Magnus turned fully around, still looking ridiculously shocked, and a little frightened. Yet, most of all he looked broken, and defeated. It hurt Alec's heart to see him like this. He ignored the searing pain in his foot, and limped toward Magnus, who was still standing stock still holding the handle of his suitcase in a death grip.

Now was the time when he needed to explain himself, but not a single word would come out. He hadn't thought anything through other than getting his attention. Izzy said don't think.

"I'm sorry," he said as he came closer. They were about 10 feet away from each other now. Everyone was still staring, whether because he was acting like some crazy guy in a movie, or because he was a celebrity, he didn't know. It was probably a little of both. At his words, Magnus dropped his suitcase and crossed his arms over his chest, emitting a closed off look. He was waiting for the punch line. "I'm sorry that I'm an asshole and that I'm afraid of myself. I'm afraid of a lot of things."

Magnus' face stayed the same, but he spoke. "You're afraid of me," he said softly, just loud enough for Alec to hear at their current distance.

This hit Alec's heart hard. He'd never wanted Magnus to think that; it wasn't true. "No, never," he said with conviction. "You'reâ€¦you're everything. You keep me from being afraid."

At this, Magnus stepped closer. "Obviously not," was all he said.

"Magnus, please. You have to understand that I panicked. You, you're completely okay with yourself. I justâ€¦I needed a little more time," Alec pleaded. He noted with a spark of hope that Magnus had taken another step toward him, and he was completely out of line now. Not that anyone else cared, they were all staring at the display.

"Youâ€¦no one, _no one_ in the entire world has ever hurt me like you did. I trusted you. With _everything_," Magnus said, and Alec felt the burning behind his eyes at Magnus' strained voice and his agonized expression. His faÃ§ade of confidence was cracking, giving way to the emotion he displayed in front of the crowd the night before. That brought the image to the forefront of Alec's mind. Again, he was going with not thinking and just doing.

"That song you sang, last night," he began, and he watched as Magnus' face contorted into one of sheer hurt. He didn't know whether it was because he was thinking of the song now, too, or because he hadn't known Alec had heard it. "Did you mean it? Do you still want to be my one and only?"

"Alecâ€¦" Magnus whispered, like the name pained him as it passed his lips. Alec couldn't have that anymore.

"Because you dared me to let you be. You asked me to just give up the charade and just be yours. That's what the song said. Well, I'm taking your challenge, Magnus."

Magnus stared at him. His face was growing red, possibly from the proximity of the present crowd. Everyone was staring, listening intently to the conversation between the two men. Alec heard the steady clicking of cameras, but he couldn't bring himself to give a fuck. He was laying it out on the line, in front of everyone, and he wanted an answer.

Magnus was biting his lip, swallowing visibly, warring with himself on the inside. They were right in front of each other close enough for Alec to reach out, and touch Magnus' heaving chest. He wanted to; he wanted to slow his breathing, and just comfort him, tell him everything was going to be okay. Yet, he wasn't sure himself.

"Alec, Iâ€¦" he stopped. He looked as if he wanted to say a million things, but he couldn't think of which one. Maybe his mind was a total blank, but Alec didn't know. Magnus lowered his head, staring at the floor. He looked like he was giving up.

"I love you," Alec said, still loud enough for at least the first two or three rows of the circle of people surrounding them to hear. Cameras continued to click away around them. Magnus' head popped up at the statement, his face unreadable. He was genuinely shocked that Alec had said it out loud, and in front of all these people. Alec couldn't say he was surprised at this reaction, considering everything that had happened. However, he was changing slowly, on the inside and the outside, letting his feelings flow from within, and not caring who saw or heard. He acted on impulse, and reached for Magnus' hand. Magnus jumped a little, but surprisingly let him take it. Alec squeezed, hopefully reassuringly, but the look on Magnus' face said it wasn't doing the job.

"Alexander," Magnus said in a strained voice, his eyes darting around and taking in the surrounding crowd. "If you haven't noticed, we have a rather substantial audienceâ€¦"

Alec's eyes hadn't moved from Magnus' face. He didn't care about a single pair of eyes except those glorious yellow-green ones. He wanted them on him again, not on the crowd. He reached up his other hand, burying his fingers in Magnus' hair on the side of his head, turning his face back to Alec's. Magnus jumped again, and took a deep, surprised breath. He found Alec's eyes staring into his.

Alec spoke extremely slowly. "Does it look like I care?" he asked, his eyes boring into Magnus'. Then, one more time, he didn't think. He just did.

He moved his hand further, around to the back of Magnus' neck, and pulled him in. He crushed their lips together, causing Magnus to gasp. Alec couldn't be sure, but he thought he heard some of the audience gasp along with him. He let the world fall away. The feel of Magnus' soft lips on his was the world. The heaven that he'd never really believed in. If heaven _was_ a place, it was here, on these lips. On these lips, Alec found the breath he needed for life. He decided then, and there that he could not live without these lips.

For a long moment, their mouths remained closed, and Magnus remained stiff with surprise, or revulsion, Alec didn't know which. Then, the extraordinary happened. Magnus relaxed into him, squeezing his hand, and his free hand came up to wrap around Alec's waist, pulling him in all the way so that their bodies were pressed against each other at every possible surface. Alec thought he saw stars behind his eyes. He sighed softly, his mouth opening. He was assaulted by the feel of Magnus' tentative tongue sliding across his lower row of teeth. God, he tasted just like Alec remembered. Like cinnamon and sunlight; everything beautiful. He also tasted salt, and registered that Magnus had finally let the tears fall from his gorgeous orbs. Alec prayed to everything that they were tears of joy, and not sorrow. The odds were in his favor. He let his own tongue slip past Magnus' lips, and was rewarded with the loveliest sound in the universe emitting from his counterpart's throat.

After an undetermined amount of time, they finally released each other's faces, but their bodies stayed glued together. Alec looked at Magnus' beautiful face, streaked with mascara tracks and blushing. He was breathtaking. Alec had never looked on such undiluted beauty. He found it hard to draw a breath, while Magnus' chest was back to heaving. As it was, he didn't even hear the thunderous applause that had erupted in the terminal, with Isabelle's resounding above them all.


	38. Chapter 38

Alec hissed with acute pain as his knuckles hit the door, between its hard surface, and the back of Magnus' head. He was sure his hand hadn't untangled from those ebony locks since they'd left the airport in Alec's DB9, which he was infinitely loving for its complete lack of regard for speed limits. In this instance, if the pair didn't get back to Alec's apartment in less than half an hour, they were liable to attack each other on the side of the highway. As it was, they were now finally inside the confines of Alec's small dwelling, his body pressing Magnus' into the door with such force that they both found it hard to breathe, but even harder to pull apart far enough to make it simpler.

They had left the airport in as inconspicuous a hurry as possible, which was not inconspicuous at all. Once they'd pulled apart enough to actually walk, Magnus had scurried over to grab his suitcase, tugging it along, his flight forgotten. Alec's foot was still kind of screaming, but it was confined to the background of sensations he was having at the moment. He had made Magnus at least text Camille, while they were in the car, so she didn't worry when he didn't show up. She had answered, but they were again too preoccupied with each other to notice when she did. They'd stumbled into the elevator, Magnus practically carrying Alec at this point because, to honest, his tendon had been pushed to the limit today.

Now they were pressed against the inside of Alec's front door, devouring each other from the inside out. Alec was sure he'd never felt so emotional and _alive_. Every nerve ending in his entire body was sparking and firing, leaving his flesh tingling and his mind reeling. Everything was Magnus, everything surrounding him was Magnus, every scent was Magnus, every want and _need_ was Magnus. Nothing else existed.

"Magnus, Magnus, MMMMagnus," he kept repeating, like a litany, a prayer. He was drowning in Magnus.

"Alec, I love you. I love you, and you're everything. Please don't leave me ever again, _please_," Magnus sighed into Alec's mouth.

"I don't know how I could," Alec replied in a raspy groan. He rolled his hips, pushing them into Magnus' groin with purpose, making the other man nearly weep with ecstasy. They were both painfully hard, aching to be free. It dawned on both of them that there was way too much fabric between the two of them, and it had to go. Magnus' hands went to the hem of Alec's gray t-shirt, nearly ripping it in two before he got it over his head. Alec's fingernails protested as they battled with Magnus' unforgiving belt buckle, he finally managed to disengage it, ripping it apart, and plunging the zipper of his pants down in record time. Magnus' erection sprang free, always the one to go commando. Well, how was underwear supposed to fit in pants that tight?

Magnus was pressing back against Alec now, pushing him toward the center of the tiny living room. Neither of them really knew where they were going. They were definitely not going to make it as far as the bedroom. At this point, even the couch was miles away. Alec ended up bending his knees, reaching one hand back to break his fall, the other pulling Magnus down with him. The carpet stung on his back as he slid a few inches with the impact of his love on top of him, but he didn't mind. Both hands were again roaming over Magnus' perfect body. The fall caused the taller man's now exposed manhood to rub against Alec's still confined one. His blue eyes drifted to the back of his head and he let out a cry.

"Off. Please, off!" he pleaded, hoping Magnus would understand his raw need to be rid of the offending garment. Magnus' hands stopped assaulting his bare chest to move down his body, and Alec writhed in anticipation. But the long fingers continued lower, bypassing the button of his jeans. Alec was about to protest in a very whiney voice, but he noticed Magnus was working with the clasp on his cast. He was eternally grateful. It was killing him as it was. He wanted every piece of flesh pressed up against that caramel skin _right now_.

"Is it going to be okay if Iâ€¦?" Magnus asked, his voice shaking from the same need Alec was battling with. Alec could only nod before letting his head fall back again. His tendon hurt still, but he was allowed to take off the cast when he slept. Well, he had a feeling there wouldn't be much sleeping in the near future, but he was allowed to take it off for certain other activities. His doctor didn't mention sexual relations, but it was implied.

Once Magnus had freed Alec's foot from the confining device, he came back up to continue his earlier endeavor. He worked his hands all the way up, grazing over Alec's muscular thighs (courtesy of soccer, of course), squeezing with nimble fingers. Those nimble fingers slid over the taut muscles and planes of Alec's now sweaty chest, while purple-black painted nails dug into his flesh. Magnus' yellow-green eyes gazed up from beneath thick onyx lashes from their position near Alec's crotch. Alec couldn't help giving a small thrust of his hips as if to say _'I'm dying here, get on with it!'_ Magnus obliged. He reached out with his hot, wet, tongue, and ran the tip of it across the thin, sensitive skin right above the waistband of Alec's jeans. Alec couldn't help his shaking body; it was almost too much, like sensation overload. Finally, he felt the button being tugged.

He looked down to find Magnus' teeth expertly prying the metal from the hole, then grasping the zipper and tugging down, causing his nose to rub against Alec's straining member through his thin plaid boxers.

"Ugggh GOD, Magnus! Mmmmphâ€¦" he was running out of coherent thoughts. He still had one, though. One that had been pulling at his mind since he'd seen Magnus' face at the airport, for the first time in a month.

Magnus continued his ministrations, pulling Alec's underwear, and pants off in one sweep before falling back down onto him. He was currently straddling Alec's knees, his face getting closer to Alec's painfully hard cock with every second.

"Alec, god, I love you," he said with a positively feral look in his eyes, nearly salivating with want. Alec's heart stopped for a second as Magnus' hot breath washed over the sensitive skin of his inner thigh. Then, in a glorious moment, Magnus' mouth descended on Alec's cock, pulling him in continuously until his nose was pressed into Alec's pelvic bone.

"AH!" Alec screamed, throwing his head back against the carpet. It was almost too much, and not enough at the same time. His hands went back to tangle in that glorious hair, trying not to push Magnus' head down, and failing horribly. Magnus didn't seem to mind, however. He continued his assault, hollowing out his cheeks, and swallowing deeply, causing his victim to cry out with a moan at various intervals.

"Magnus, ohâ€¦godâ€¦nnnngggâ€¦" Alec couldn't help the thrusting of his hips up into the wet heat of Magnus' throat, but he didn't want to come just yet. He wanted moreâ€”so much more. "Magnus, wait...mmmmffffâ€¦wait. Stop," he finally ground out against the will of his cock, definitely.

Magnus took his mouth off of him, keeping his hand on him to pump vigorously. "What is it, baby? What do you want?" he asked, his voice grown raspy after his throat's workout. It made Alec so incredibly horny he wanted to devour him. But he worked to keep his thoughts in line. He wanted this.

"Come here," he said, looking down at him and motioning with his eyes. "Come up here." Magnus looked puzzled, but moved to straddle Alec's hips, putting a hand on the floor on each side of his head, bracing himself.

"Is there a problem?" Magnus said in his raspy voice, only serving to make Alec more heated and less able to get his vocabulary in order.

"No, no I justâ€¦Iâ€¦" he was totally sure of what he wanted to say, but he was having a hard time getting it out. It scared him, and invigorated him at the same time. He reached up pulling Magnus' face down, and burying his own in Magnus' neck. Alec nipped, and sucked for a little bit, causing the other man to thrust his hips into Alec, thus pulling a moan from both of them. Alec used this moment to gather his courage, and his coherence. Still keeping his face near Magnus' sweaty skin, he moved his mouth to caress against the shell of his ear. Magnus shivered almost uncontrollably, digging his fingers into the unforgiving carpet and emitting another agonized groan. Alec took a deep breath, tugging at the dark locks intertwined between his fingers. "Magnusâ€¦make love to me Magnus." He used the same words Magnus had used the first time. It brought the memory back full force, and found he had a deliberate _need_ to experience it the way Magnus had. "Iâ€¦I need you inside me. I want to feel you, everywhere. Please, Magnus," he sighed into his ear.

If Magnus was uncontrollably shivering before, he went completely still now. Alec felt him swallow hard, and he pulled back to look him in the face. "Are youâ€¦" But Magnus couldn't get the sentence out. He just searched Alec's eyes desperately, looking for some sign of truth or doubt. He looked as though if the answer to the half question was "no", he might break down in hysterics. But Alec was resolved. He found he had been for a long time.

"I'm sure, Magnus. Love me," he pleaded, adding a thrust of his hips to accentuate the request. Magnus remained frozen for a half second longer, but then moved to press their lips together. The need was so raw it threatened to pull them both under. Magnus started kicking his legs, and Alec figured he was trying to work his own pants the rest of the way off. When he'd succeeded, their fully naked groins pressed together with just the right amount of friction and slide from their sweat to cause them both to just simply bite down on each other's lips, since that's what was readily available. Magnus' teeth released their hold.

"Alec, are you completely sure?" he whispered into his mouth. "I know you've neverâ€¦"

"Magnus, I love you," Alec said, as if this explained everything. It did.

"I'm going to have toâ€¦prepare you. Or else you'll hate it," Magnus said shakily.

"I don'tâ€¦think I could possibly hate you being a part of me. Ever. But I also understand you. And Magnus, I'm ready. I'm in your hands. I love you, I love you, I love you," he repeated, burying his face in Magnus' neck again as their whole bodies pressed up against each other, and Alec's back pressed into the carpet of the living room floor.

"Do you have anyâ€”" Magnus whispered in his ear, but Alec interrupted him.

"Drawer," he said, motioning with his head at the end table next to his head. Magnus reluctantly pushed himself up and balanced on one arm to open the drawer on the little table. Alec took this time to try and relax himself. He was ready for this, but that didn't mean it didn't scare him. He knew it was painful; Magnus had demonstrated that. He had done it before, well before him, and he trusted Magnus with everything just as Magnus had trusted him. Plus, this was the final barrier to them being equals. Alec was giving himself over to him, willing to take on the most vulnerable position in the relationship.

Magnus came back down, with a small, half-empty bottle of lube in his hand. One more time, he looked at Alec to gauge his reaction. Alec simply reached a hand up and tucked his dangling hair behind his ear. Alec was letting Magnus take the lead, letting him teach. He watched with rapt attention as Magnus popped the cap, and squeezed the liquid out onto his two middle fingers. Alec's heart started to pound. Magnus closed the bottle, and placed it by Alec's head. He bent down to kiss Alec; more sweetly, and gently than they had since they'd encountered each other. As Alec gave himself over to the kiss, his body relaxed slightly, allowing Magnus to situate himself between Alec's legs, gently urging them apart, allowing him better access. Alec bent one knee, placing his foot on the floor, thus opening him up even further. He felt so exposed and vulnerable, yet completely at ease, because it was Magnus.

Alec was only slightly distracted from the situation by the kiss, so he felt it acutely when Magnus used his middle finger to caress his entrance. He jumped at the cold sensation of the liquid that coated his hand, but tried to relax.

"It's okay," Magnus soothed, and just like that Alec was supple again. Magnus continued to rub soft circles against the bundle of nerves, trying to coax it into submission. He let just the tip of his middle finger dip inside causing Alec to bite down on his lip, and moan. It felt so right. He encouraged Magnus by pushing forward with his hips, causing the finger to plunge deeper. They were no longer kissing, just breathing each other's air; their foreheads pressed together, and eyes closed. Magnus took the hint and continued pushing further. The sensation was hard for Alec to describe. It felt like an invasion, but on the other hand it felt like the appetizer for a delicious main course. He felt the pressure of his tight walls against the digit, and he wondered, not for the first time, just _how_ painful this was going to be. Magnus' fingers were rather thin, and this was just one. "Are you okay?" Magnus asked with tentative eyes. His hand remained still, buried as far as it could go.

Alec nodded. He reached up, and kissed Magnus on the tip of the nose, then pressed back down, closed his eyes, and just _felt_. He rocked his hips again, spurring Magnus to move his finger inside of him. Magnus did the most amazing circle with his middle finger that felt just ridiculously lovely. Alec let go, and let out a moan. Magnus began to slide in and out very slowly, taking his time. Alec was grateful he was taking it slow, but he was eager.

"More," he sighed. If his eyes had been open, he would have seen Magnus' expression as he looked down on what he thought was the most beautiful, and erotic thing he'd ever witnessed. Alexander Lightwood, submissive, and full of passion and pleasure was damn near perfect looking. Magnus acquiesced, inserting his ring finger on the next dive in. Alec's face scrunched in pain, so he didn't move once inside, letting Alec adjust to the intrusion once more. About a minute later, he did the same circle with his fingers, causing Alec's jaw to go slack. He pulled in a deep breath, his eyebrows knitting together. But then Magnus did it again, and his eyebrows shot up as his eyes rolled back in his head.

Alec was in ecstasy. Magnus had grazed that bundle of nerves inside him that made his back arch. He was starting to feel deprived, like he was being teased, and kept from the main event. "Magnus," he breathed, his eyes still closed. "Please, I justâ€¦_please_." It was all that would come to him. He fluttered his eyes open to find Magnus staring at him in awe. "Magnus, I _need_â€¦" He couldn't even finish the sentence.

Magnus' face didn't change, but Alec almost let out a cry of agony at the loss of his fingers inside him. This is what he wanted. Magnus placed both hands on the floor on either side of Alec's face. Alec, still with one leg bent, and the other splayed out to the side, knees falling open, reached down to stroke Magnus' throbbing cock. Magnus was big, like really big. The night they first met, he'd said he was nine inches. He spoke the absolute truth. He reached over to the bottle of lube lying beside Alec's head, popping it open again. Alec held out his hand, and he poured a decent amount of the slippery liquid into his palm. Magnus closed the cap, and watched as Alec's hand encircled him tentatively. He let out a low groan at the contact, causing Alec to do the same. Hearing that sound come out of Magnus was heaven. He'd pulled it from him before, but it never failed to get him going.

Once Magnus was slippery and glistening, Alec brought his hand back up, wiped it on the carpet, and then twined his fingers in Magnus' hair again. That was like his safe haven; he always went there when he was unsure, or unsettled. He was nervous, but not afraid. He knew Magnus would never hurt him if he didn't have to. Magnus balanced on one hand, and reached down to position himself. Alec's breathing started to pick up, but before Magnus could say anything, he relaxed himself. He just kept telling himself that the pleasure would set in eventually. It was _Magnus_ nothing could be bad.

He took a deep breath, and closed his eyes. Magnus took his cue, and begin to slowly push inside. Oh, god. It hurtâ€¦bad, but Alec just kept on breathing. He tried not to _hold _his breath, which was his instinct. He just kept breathing out of his mouth in slow, even pants, working through the pain. He didn't notice that his eyes were clenched shit until he felt Magnus' gentle fingers pass over his eyelids. He immediately relaxed his face. Magnus was staying still, and Alec could tell he wasn't very far inside. He opened his eyes to look up, and saw Magnus' face was a contortion of concern, pleasure, agony, and determination. Alec was so tight, and Magnus was probably dying to start moving again. But he asked before he did anything else.

"Are you okay?" he asked, his voice more strained than he probably wanted it to be.

"Yes, Iâ€¦I'm fine," Alec said, his own voice coming out sounding much the same. "Justâ€¦go slow," he said. Magnus nodded and began to push in further. Alec groaned in the back of his throat, half from pleasure, half from pain, but Magnus kept going. He was glad he didn't stop, or Alec might have had to speak again. It might come out as a squeak or something embarrassing like that. On and on, he felt the pressure build inside him. It was painful, but slowly the feeling of being filled with Magnus took over, making Alec's heart surge. It was already beating at a wild rhythm, just from the proximity of his lover after so long. But this, the feeling of being completely consumed by Magnus' body, was the single most incredible thing he'd ever felt in his life.

After an agonizing 5 full minutes, Alec finally felt Magnus' hips press into him, indicating he was fully sheathed inside him. Lord bless him, he stayed still, still concerned for Alec's comfort. Alec lay there, letting himself adjust to the taut pressure bearing down on him. After a few seconds, he gave a small, experimental roll of his hips. This caused them both to catch their breath. Everything was so _magnified_; the tiniest movements pulled forth waves of sensation.

"Alecâ€¦godâ€¦" Magnus started, his forehead pressing into Alec's gently, their breath mixing together to form the sweetest taste of love.

"Oh babyâ€¦y-yesssâ€¦" Both their voices were barely above a whisper. Alec rolled his hips again, bigger this time, and was assaulted with Magnus' cry into his ear.

"Jesus!" Magnus wailed.

"Come on, loverâ€¦give inâ€¦I'm fine. I'll beâ€¦more fine onceâ€¦youâ€¦" Alec was panting between words. He thought he was giving the right hints, but Magnus wasn't getting that he wanted him to _move_. He wondered if Magnus was still scared of hurting him. Tentatively, he bore down with his abdominal muscles, causing his walls to contract around Magnus. In turn, his lover screamed in rapture, and involuntarily jerked his hips to where he slid out an inch or so and plunged back in in a matter of half a second. Alec bit down on his lip, and tried not to whimper in pain; but Magnus was already a step ahead.

"Oh god, I'm sorry," he ground out his eyes clenched shut obviously warring with his nether regions, and trying not to do it again. But the pain was gone as quickly as it had come; Magnus had nothing to be sorry for. If anything, it spurred Alec's pleasure to see such an amazing human being brought down to the mercy of his body.

"No, no, noâ€¦" Alec soothed. He used the hand still tangled in Magnus' hair to bring his face down so he could capture his lips in a tender harmony of passion. Magnus responded, and moved his hips again, slower this time. He slid out halfway, extremely slowly, and then pushed back in just as slowly. It was amazing to Alec, feeling himself continuously stretched and molded to Magnus' length and thickness. It was like they were made to fit together, either way. They were made for each other, as clichÃ© as it sounded. Alec was nowhere but here now.

As Magnus continued to pull himself in, and out in an ethereal rhythm, the lovers' lips devoured each other. It was all they could do not to just melt into each other. It had been so long since they'd been this close, this intimate, and they'd never been in this exact position before, so it was like everything was new. All new sensations, all new emotions, all new everything.

They could have gone for hours, and Alec was willing, but he could tell Magnus was having a hard time holding back. His strokes were still very slow and gentle, and Alec was enjoying it immensely, but he too was ready for a bit more to push him over the edge.

"More, Magnus. Give me all you canâ€¦" his lips pleaded from their place right at his lover's earlobe, giving it a tug with the suction of his lips, causing the form above him to hum low in the back of his throat. That was one of the most intimate things: the sounds Magnus made as he pleasured them both. They were so animal, and uncontrolled it made Alec shiver each time, emitting sounds of his own. Magnus obliged his request, beginning to move not faster, but with more force. He kept his pace the same, but when he pushed in, he gave a little forceful shove, causing Alec's body to shift on the carpet. It made the sensation a whole-body experience. It was amazing, but Alec could tell it wasn't going to get him there, at least along with Magnus, who looked about ready to explode. Like he was reading his mind, Magnus spoke up mid-thrust.

"Contract your abs, and curl your hips up, toward your chin," he said.

"What?" Alec asked, confused but willing to try anything.

"Trust me, Alexander," Magnus cooed.

Alec did as he was asked. He tightened his stomach muscles, lifting his hips upward. It made things tighter, but he didn't see what the big ideaâ€¦

Magnus thrust all the way in again.

"AH GOD!" Alec screamed into the sweaty flesh of Magnus' neck as he hit Alec's prostate with a firm stroke. "Oh jesus, againâ€¦_again_," he pleaded. This was absolutely amazing. He went from feeling like the stamina king to whimpering, and barely holding on in a matter of seconds. Magnus pushed in again, and when he brushed against the bundle of nerves again, he held there and rolled his hips in a circle, stimulating it. Alec was reduced to shaking and incoherent phrases coming out of his mouth. "Mmphâ€¦uuuunnnngggâ€¦.oh plea-pleaaaaseâ€¦MAGNUS!"

His lover kept up the sweet assault, giving him more and more each time, his own control finally unfurling in the process. Alec's erection had been gliding in the sweat between their heated bodies, constantly stimulated, and one more stroke to his prostate had him screaming out Magnus' name as his orgasm hit him in wave after wave of continuous ecstasy. Every muscle in his body contracted and released over and over, eventually finally pulling Magnus' release from him. Alec felt hot passion shoot inside of him and all he could do was pull Magnus' body closer, trying to take him into himself even more than he already had. They rode out their pleasure for what seemed like hours, just _feeling_ each other, not talking. A good time later, once they were exhausted and spent, Magnus attempted to roll off of Alec, probably thinking he was hurting him by having his full weight resting on top of him, but Alec would have _none_ of that. He tightened his hold around Magnus' neck, his fingers twined in the longest strands of his hair at the back of his neck, holding him there.

"Don't leave me yet," he pleaded.

"But, I don't want to crush youâ€¦" Magnus protested weakly. Alec could tell he was completely drained, and unwilling to withdraw himself anyway.

"Oh, because you're such a fat ass, and everything," Alec teased. When Alec wrapped his arms around Magnus' waist, his hands almost made it around to his hips again. Magnus was by no means overweight. He was thin as a rail, but still substantial. He was perfect.

"I feel like a bear, suffocating you with my enormity. But I _am_ comfyâ€¦" he said, laying his head down in the dip of Alec's shoulder. Alec's hands moved from his neck down to rub gentle circles on his back. "Okay, eventually you're going to regret this decision," Magnus protested. "I'll make a compromise with you," and without uttering another word, he used what was left of his strength to roll them to the side, laying his arm underneath Alec's neck while drawing him close. He stayed buried inside, because somehow, he was still a bit firm. He knew over the course of sleep they would pull apart at the juncture, but for now he was content to remain as close as they could. Alec buried his face underneath Magnus' chin, and curled up like a baby. Before long, their breaths evened out together, and they were lost to the world. It was nearly 3pm.


	39. Chapter 39

Magnus woke to the adorable vision of Alec's chin resting on his chest, those baby blues gazing up at him like he was the second coming, the rapture. Magnus didn't think he'd ever get over those eyes and their innocence. They were lovely. But also, part of the fun was knowing that innocence wasn't all that lay behind them. He knew Alec had an inner animal lurking in their somewhere, and he planned to bring it out sometime soon. They'd broken every barrier; they'd pushed down every wall. Now it was time to have some serious fun.

"You just gonna stare at my chin all day? Or were you going to wake me up?" Magnus teased.

Alec's giggle caused his chest to vibrate. It was nice, but it was also doing things to his nether regions. "Well, I couldn't stare at you all _day_, considering it's one in the morning."

"Ah, well. We better get up then," Magnus said, trying to disengage himself from the death grip Alec had around his waist.

"Why? I'm so comfy hereâ€¦" Alec protested, laying his cheek down on Magnus' chest like a baby hugging a teddy bear. Magnus almost couldn't take it. But he knew this was going to suck for Alec when they got up, because he was sure having his foot in this position on the hard living room floor wasn't very sensible.

"Alec, you need to get into bed. You're never going to heal right if you sleep on the floor all the time. Come on, I'll carry you like I did when we brought you back from the hospital," he laughed finally rolling over, and sitting up.

"Ohhhh no you don't. I can get up by myself thank you," Alec whined. "But I don't want to go to bed. I need a shower, like, _now_." And he looked up at Magnus with the most imploringly adorable expression Magnus had ever seen. How on earth could he resist that?

"Fine. But just be careful. All I need is for you to slip and fall. Then we wouldn't be able to do all these fun activities for even _longer_," he said.

"Well, you could always hold me up, or catch me if I start to fall. What? You didn't think I was going to allow you to remain _outside_ the shower while I was in there, did you?" Alec asked with a vicious gleam. Magnus felt his body shiver. The thought of Alec dripping wet, and slick was enough to melt even his toughest resolve; that definitely wasn't present at the moment. However, he put on an impassive face, trying to hide the gears that were turning in his mind at the moment.

"Oh, alright. If you insist. You just want me to give you a sponge bath, don't you?" Alec blushed just a tiny bit, and Magnus sighed inwardly with victory at the color.

"What's wrong with that? You'd like it anyway, so it's a win-win," he stated. Magnus couldn't agree more. He slowly helped Alec up from his place in the middle of the living room. The bottle of lube was still lying on the floor discarded, a blatant reminder of their make-up the night before. Magnus concluded that he could never ever attempt to number their sexual encounters in order of hotness. There was no way any of them could compare to the others, they were all epic. And there hadn't actually been that many of them. Magnus was extremely keen on changing that in the future. Starting now.

They made their way to Alec's small bathroom, Alec limping slightly but insisting he was fine, just stiff. Magnus tried not to smirk childishly at his choice of words. He sat Alec down on the lid of the toilet while he turned on the water in the shower, listening contentedly as the drops hit the tile. It was soothing already.

He turned back to Alec, who was leaning back with his eyes closed. He looked like he was about to fall back asleep, and Magnus couldn't have that, no matter how gorgeous he looked. They were both still completely naked from their day of loving, so they didn't really have anything to do to pass the time while the water heated up. In Alec's tiny bathroom, in the bright light, it was easy to see all the lines on Alec's face that Magnus was sure hadn't been there before. He was only 23 years old, practically still a teenager, and yet his face looked like he'd seen a great deal more years. He supposed that Alec had about the same experience as he'd had with the breakup. He always knew in his heart that Alec didn't hate him, or not want to be with him. He understood internally, that he was just terrified. Alec led a very private life very different from his siblings, and Magnus understood the need to hide something like his sexuality from the public; especially considering he was an athlete.

Magnus did some thinking while they were apart, and concluded that Alec's reaction wasn't all that surprising. He had suppressed himself for a very long time, and having your life ripped away from your clutches, and put on display for the entire world without your knowledge is a pretty shitty situation. Magnus, had he not already been out, would have probably reacted in much the same way; although, he wouldn't have freaked out _as much_, since he's pretty comfortable with who he is anyway. Alec is so obviously not there yet. He still blushes when Magnus references sex or cock. But he's coming around. Once he's turned on, though, all that blushing goes out the window, and he turns into some sort of gay sex god sent from Magnus' own personal heaven. He couldn't count how many times he'd jacked off to the memory of Alec taking him on top of the piano. He shivered at the thought just now.

"Are you just going to stare at me?" Alec asked without opening his eyes, echoing Magnus' tease from earlier. Magnus didn't say anything just smiled, and made his way over to where Alec sat. Alec opened his eyes staring up, and Magnus couldn't help but smile. Was this real? He'd been sure he'd never have this again. He was afraid he was dreamingâ€¦ But then, Alec opened his arms while Magnus straddled his lap sitting down, and pressing their groins together causing them both to moan abruptly. Magnus pressed his chest against Alec, and Alec's face was pressed into the crook of his neck. Like it was second nature, his lips latched on to the naked skin there sucking gently, and causing Magnus to damn near purr with pleasure.

After another five minutes or so of soft nibbling, and sweet kisses, Magnus pulled away, standing up while reaching a hand out to Alec. He took it, and hobbled up a little unsteady on his feet.

"Okay, yeah. It hurts. Shit," he said, standing only on his good leg.

"Told you we shouldn't have slept on the floor," Magnus said with a small eye roll.

"I don't recall you putting up an enormous fight for your cause."

"Yeah well, I was exhausted. You can't expect me to still be advocate for safety when I'm completely sexed out." Alec just smiled at this, and put his arm around Magnus' shoulders so his boyfriend could help him into the shower. Magnus made sure Alec was steady on his feet before he climbed in and shut the curtain, trapping all the steam inside, and letting it wrap them up. A hot, steamy shower was always the best way to loosen up, and relax stiff muscles. This would do them good after the uncomfortable sleep they'd woken up from.

As soon as the water his Magnus' back, he sighed out loud leaning his head back, and letting the water wash through his thick, silky, hair.

* * *

Alec watched in awe at the angel in front of him. It was like something out of a movie, or something the way the water dripped down over Magnus' body in little rivers that accentuated his sparse muscle tone. Alec liked that Magnus wasn't completely buff. He liked that he was long, thin, and lithe. He watched with rapt attention as Magnus' long body stretched underneath the steaming stream, his hips pushing forward just a bit, and Alec knew the muscles in his backside were tensing. He imagined it and couldn't help but reach out, and slide his hand over Magnus' hip, working it around behind him before running his fingers over the hard yet supple muscles. Magnus gasped a little, but didn't stop his preening. His head was so far back that the water was hitting at the top of his seamless caramel colored chest now. He just looked like a god.

Once Magnus had finished his little show (or so Alec liked to call it), he looked up, smiled, pulled Alec in and crushed their lips together. Alec moaned into his lover's mouth, vibrating both their lips. Tongues slipped in, and out in a leisurely dance, pulling sighs as well as hums from both of them in turn. Alec felt Magnus gently tugging on his shoulders, where his hands were squeezing, and kneading the muscles there. Alec responded, and let Magnus turn him underneath the stream of water. They continued to kiss languidly, but Magnus' hands worked their way down Alec's body, caressing every inch. It felt like heaven, with the steam all around them, and the warmth of Magnus all over him. Their bodies were pressed together, as close as they could get. So, Alec let out a little whimper when Magnus began to pull away.

**Song for this section: I Like it Rough by Lady Gaga**

When he started to protest verbally, Magnus put a finger over his lips. "Shh, just relax," he implored, placing his lips back on Alec's for another second before pulling away again. He began to work his hands lower, pulling on Alec's sides, and squeezing, working lower down to grasp his ass. Alec gasped. He was still sore from the night (day) before, so he was a little scared Magnus was about to work him over again. But when Magnus knelt down on his knees in front of him, he knew that wasn't the case. This time, his gasp was full of anticipation. He looked down, watching his beautiful lover. Magnus was looking at Alec's straining erection with such hunger that Alec nearly came undone. It was so incredibly hot to be wanted that much by someone that beautiful.

Without preamble, Magnus took Alec in his hand, and gave a long, slow tug. Alec bit his lip to keep from crying out. Magnus wasn't being rough or demanding; he was taking it slowly, and trying to savor the moment. Then, he looked up at Alec through his thick ebony lashes, and let his tongue creep out through his kiss-swollen lips. Keeping eye contact, he ran his tongue from the head all the way down to the base, working lower, and taking Alec's left testicle in between his lips. Alec could barely stand upright anymore. His knees were getting weak. And then Magnus pulled out all the stops. He kept his yellow-green eyes trained on Alec's ocean blue ones, and slowly descended his lips down over Alec's straining erection. Alec let out a long, low, groan from the bottom of his chest. Moreover, Magnus echoed the sound with his throat around Alec's cock, making his lips vibrate, and causing Alec to nearly scream. The sound echoed off the bathroom walls, making it sound ten times louder than it was. Alec's hand shot up as he tried to steady himself against the wall of the shower. It was almost too much to stare down at Magnus, the water running down and hitting him in the face as he closed his eyes and took Alec down to the base.

His hands came up to stroke Alec's balls gently pulling, and squeezing gingerly. It was the most glorious feeling Alec had ever experienced. So many sensations were rolling over his skin, and nerves that it was hard to focus on one at a time. The water rolling down his chest onto Magnus' upturned, submissive face, Magnus' lips caressing his pelvic bone, and Magnus' hands on his balls. The steam enveloping them both, and causing Alec's skin to prickle with sensation. But Magnus' face was the best. There was something about such a powerful and assertive person being in that position that drove Alec wild. Alec wasn't really a Dominant type, but he did appreciate Magnus' occasional submissive nature. He liked them to be equals, but it still turned him on to have Magnus literally kneel before him. And GOD, he had some skills with his mouth.

Alec couldn't help himself, so he let the fingers of his free hand snake into Magnus' wet hair. They forced their way in, causing a little tug, which in turn pulled a whimper from Magnus. Alec was abruptly scared that he'd hurt him, but then he heard the hottest thing he'd ever heard up until then; that was saying something.

With his mouth still half on Alec's cock, Magnus whispered, "_Again_." It was so fucking erotic Alec couldn't function for a second. But then, his senses returned, and he tightened his grip. He tugged again, just a little. Magnus moaned around his cock, so he did it again, a little harder. Magnus' hands shot up, and went around to grasp Alec's ass, pulling him in. Alec thrust along with the pull. Suddenly, this was going from slow, and relaxing to hot as hell. Then, Magnus surprised, and turned him on again. He pulled his mouth off, his hands dropping off of Alec's skin, and going around to behind his own back, clasping together. Alec was confused, but also heated. He'd just been thinking about Magnus being submissive, and here he was, kneeling in reverence in front of him. It was almost too much. His exotic eyes were staring up, pleading. He spoke.

"Fuck my face," he whispered. Alec's eyebrows raised so rapidly, he didn't know it was possible.

"What did you say?" he asked in a shaky voice. He knew it, but he just wanted to hear it again.

"Fuck my face, _please_," Magnus repeated. Alec was done. He could die a happy fucking death, just hearing those words from this glorious man. His hand was still twined in Magnus' tangled wet locks, so he tugged forcefully. Magnus' eyes closed, and his tongue slid out to wet his lips. Then, the hottest vision ever: Alec's hand holding Magnus by the hair, Magnus' mouth dropped open, and waiting. He didn't waste another second. He guided Magnus' face toward him, and shoved himself in forcefully all the way back, making Magnus choke a little. Magnus' teeth grazed his sensitive skin, and he screamed in pleasure. He hoped his neighbors couldn't hear him; they'd think he was being murdered.

He braced himself on the wall, and continued to pull Magnus' face into his groin. Listening to Magnus' whimpering, gasping sounds made him extremely close to shooting his load down Magnus' throat. Every now and then, Magnus would gag around him, but it was so fucking hot he couldn't quit. Plus, Magnus seemed to welcome it. Who'd have thought he liked to be abused? God, that was so fucking sexy. But Alec was getting close, and his thoughts started to go out the window. Magnus must have noticed his rhythm faltering, because he started making a sound that was different, like he was trying to protest. Alec pulled him off his own dick, and looked down, trying his hardest to hold back. It wasn't fucking helping that Magnus just looked wanton and his lips were swollen and red and justâ€¦DEAR GOD.

"What is it?" Alec ground out through his panting breaths. Magnus just closed his eyes, and bit his lip working it between his teeth. He occasionally let his tongue slip out to lick his bottom lip, like he already had cum in his mouth, and was savouring it. It was absolutely ridiculous. "Magnus?" Alec asked, nearly unable to hold off his orgasm much longer.

"My face," he whispered, and Alec almost didn't hear him over the pounding water. He repeated himself, a little louder. "My face, baby," he said, looking up at him like a scolded child who needed a good spanking. Alec was officially done. He couldn't have made his dick make it back to Magnus' mouth in time if he wanted to. He shot hot milky liquid onto Magnus' plump pucker, onto his cheeks, and chin. He pumped himself to milk it all from deep inside him, making sure all of it was deposited onto his lover's face. Magnus looked like he was in ecstasy, letting the thick juice run down off his lips onto his chin and on the shower floor. My _GOD._

Alec, feeling weaker than he had in ages, fell backwards to lean on the wall of the shower. His knees couldn't hold him up anymore. He slid down the wall, to the floor where he pulled his knees into his chest and sighed a deep, exhausted sigh. He looked over to Magnus, who was still kneeling, but he was now under the stream of water, letting it wash away what Alec had done to him. Alec felt a little weird, and confused at himself for what he'd done. But Magnus had seemed to like it, right?

"That," Magnus began as he crawled over, and situated himself between Alec's knees, "was the single most erotic thing I have ever experienced in my entire fucking life. No one has ever actually agreed to do it to me. Well, I've never actually worked up the courage to askâ€¦" Magnus was rambling. He only rambled when he was nervous or embarrassed. He was embarrassed that he liked it. This put Alec at ease, because he knew this kind of thing was out of the ordinary, and he had been surprised that he liked it. But apparently Magnus liked it too, and had wanted to do it for some time. Alec was abruptly honored, and proud that he was the first to fulfill this fantasy for Magnus. After all, his boyfriend was a hell of a lot more experienced than he was, and to partake in one of _his_ firsts was a milestone.

"I'm glad I could help you out," he said coyly. Magnus' face changed. Alec realized he hadn't expected to be accepted by him that fast. Magnus thought Alec would say something about it. "I actuallyâ€¦enjoyed it a lot. Didn't think I would like something like that butâ€¦" he trailed off, letting it hang in the air. Magnus looked at him with an expression so full of love that the smile it brought hurt Alec's face. It was amazing how they could go from one extreme to the other so quickly. He had no doubt in his mind that this was it. He was in this for the long haul. Magnus had trusted him enough to ask him for his deepest fantasy, and that touched Alec.

However, a storm cloud blew over his mind. He knew they'd just had make up sex, and he'd gotten the best blowjob of his life. However, they were kind of living in an alternate reality for the moment. They were living in the bubble of "we're back together, and we can't get enough of each other", but sooner or later, they'd have to discuss things. Like, where do they go from here? Are they truly over this fight? It meant a lot that Alec had kissed him in front of hundreds of people in a crowded airport, yes, but did that mean Magnus had forgiven him for everything? He doubted it. They'd have to hash out the details of where they go from here pretty soon. But for now, Alec was content to just love Magnus. He was back in his arms again.

Eventually, the water ran cold. They stopped their languid making out to get out of the shower and wrap themselves in a towel. Magnus practically carried Alec to the bedroom, where they collapsed on top of the covers, and fell asleep for the rest of the night.


	40. Chapter 40

Alec's dreams of exotic, green-yellow, eyes were interrupted by what sounded like the most beautiful song of a lark. There was a lilting melody that clouded his mind, and intoxicated his senses even through sleep. It was soothing, and he had started to actually see the notes played out in front of his eyes as swirling starlight drifting over him as it pulled him out of unconsciousness. He was sad; he wanted to stay in this place of beauty. But he found that the further he got from the abyss of sleep, the clearer the melody sounded. He welcomed it with open arms, letting it pull him into the land of consciousness.

_Sometimes it snows in April_

_Sometimes I feel so bad, so bad_

_Sometimes I wish that life was never ending_

_But all good things, they say, never last_

Alec recognized the song. It was one of his favorites. As he became further awake, he also recognized the voice, and it wasn't Prince. It was his very own angel sent to deliver him from himself. Alec's eyes opened slowly, finally leaving the dream realm. He was the most comfortable he'd been in ages, wrapped in his comforter on his soft bed, and surrounded by pillows. He felt clean from the invigorating shower he'd taken right before bed, and sated from the amazing pleasure he'd endured during said shower. This was one of the most peaceful mornings he could ever remember having. His arms searched the other side of the bed for the warmth he'd fallen asleep with, but they came up empty. He turned his head to look at the far corner of the room.

There was his lover in a pair of his own black pajama pants leaning broodingly over his small bookcase. The music was coming from Alec's ipod, which was docked on the fourth shelf. The voice came from Magnus, a low hum barely articulating the words. But the simple strain in that voice spoke volumes. The song was one of loss and pain, and these emotions found purchase in that voice. Magnus' ability to project his emotions never failed to amaze Alec, and sometimes it brought him to his knees. This threatened to be one of those times. He didn't want to interrupt, but he had the overwhelming need to pull Magnus into him and tell him everything was okay, even if it wasn't.

He slowly rolled to his side, and slid to the edge of the bed getting up without much sound. He walked steadily (still a little sore) toward his man, the man he pinned all his dreams of happiness on. Without a word, he slid both his arms around Magnus' waist, pulling him into his chest. The humming ceased, but Magnus just sighed as he leaned back into Alec letting the younger man trace a hand up his chest to rest over his heart. Alec wasn't sure what made him do that, but just the feel of Magnus' steady heartbeat made him feel grounded and safe. He wanted to do the same for Magnus.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you," Magnus said softly.

"Don't ever apologize for waking me like that. In fact, you should apologize for not waking me before you started. I can never get enough of you, you know." Alec was speaking the complete truth. He found that he'd turned into quite a sap when it came to Magnus, but he honestly didn't really care.

"I have to say, you aren't _completely_ pop-culture-less," Magnus answered, turning to face Alec. Alec wasn't sure what he saw in his lover's face. Sadness? Loneliness? Regret?

"Oh?" was Alec's reply.

"You happen to have some very good taste in music. Well, aside from the occasional Creed song. But I'll let those slide, since I love you so much," he teased. Alec happened to like Creed thank you very much, but he wasn't going to protest Magnus telling him he actually liked at least some of his music. Isabelle usually had nothing to do but criticize it.

"Why did you pick this song in particular?" Alec wondered.

Magnus didn't answer right away. Instead, he leaned down, and captured Alec's lips moving them fluidly with his own. Their kisses were something of a lifeline for Alec; he'd grown so accustomed to Magnus' lips on his that he wasn't sure how he survived not having that for a month. But now, now they were back, and they were wonderful and sweet and wet and supple and a thousand other adjectives that didn't do them justice. Alec was sometimes amazed at how they could go from one extreme to another, very dirty one minute to sweet and loving the next. But he appreciated it. At least they weren't one of those couples who lived in the bedroom, but they weren't ones who never saw the bedroom either. They had the perfect balance. But Alec was getting ahead of himself. They'd only been "back together" for about 24 hours. Who was to say they were actually "back together"?

For the moment, however, Alec just let those nagging thoughts slide away, and enjoyed the feel of his lover's warmth surrounding him. Magnus was pushing him back toward the bed, and Alec was very willing to oblige. Once he felt the soft mattress on the backs of his knees, he let himself collapse back, bringing Magnus with him. The kiss, however, remained patient, not really picking up intensity. It just remained in the realm of love without crossing into lust. These were turning out to be Alec's favorite kisses, because they meant that there was something other than the physical between them. Not that he'd ever doubted it before, but after nights like the last, he always liked to be reassured. Everything just seemed too good to be true sometimes, but it was kisses like these that put those fears to rest.

He felt the familiar weight of Magnus' body on top of him, fully encircling him in warmth. He brought his hands up to clutch at his shoulders, while Magnus ran one hand down his side to grasp his hip firmly, pulling them closer together. Alec gave a soft, contented sigh. Soon, though, the kiss died down. But it didn't feel like a loss to Alec, just a hiatus. Magnus shifted his body to the side so his full weight was off of Alec, but his upper body remained on top, his head laying firmly over Alec's heart. Alec was momentarily self-conscious that Magnus could hear its rapidity, but brushed off the feeling.

"It reminds me of her," came the quiet voice below his chin. Well, that explained the emotions chasing across his face earlier. Alec could very much see how that song would remind Magnus of his mother. It was about pain and loss, losing someone very special and not really understanding why.

"I think that your voice becomes impossibly more beautiful when you are thinking of her, but that's just me," Alec whispered. He played with the ends of Magnus' hair with his fingertips, occasionally running his hand through from roots to ends. He found this simple gesture to be calming for both of them. Whenever he was nervous or scared, he found that just sliding his hands into Magnus' thick, silky black strands tended to ground him. Also, it seemed to comfort Magnus as well, having Alec perform the simple, calming gesture. It was an odd thing to share, but it was something the two of them had that was just theirs. It never failed to bring them closer together, to make one shine brighter in the other's eyes.

"Now you're starting to sound like her," Magnus sighed, and Alec was afraid he'd made him upset. But the small chuckle that he emitted in the next instant calmed those fears. He was abruptly humbled at being compared to someone that Magnus held so highly in his heart. It made him smile.

"I'll take that as a compliment."

"You should. She always knew exactly what to say to make me forget the rest of the world. You know, I never really came out and told my parents I was bi, but when I started wearing eyeliner, I think she knew. And you know what she did? She started telling me she loved me, a lot more. Like, on any occasion she could find. I think she was trying to say that she knew, and that it didn't change anything. And that was just one of the things that made her the most beautiful and loving woman in the world." Magnus sighed deeply after he'd finished his speech. Alec tried to picture Magnus' mother. He thought he probably got the beauty from her.

"What did she look like?"

"I'll show you sometime. I have a book full of pictures of her at my apartment back home. Which reminds me," he said, leaning up and propping himself up, his chin on his fist so he was looking Alec right in the face. "I really do need to go home and pack my stuff."

"Why?" Alec wondered. They hadn't really done much talking since Magnus had abandoned his flight and gone home with him, but he had begun to wonder what Magnus was really doing in LA.

"Well, I guess I shouldn't expect you to know," he laughed. "Uh, wellâ€¦it's a long story, but basically Camille made me get up in front of a bunch of people and sing, and there was a Capitol executive there that asked me to come audition for the label. So I did. And the other night, they asked me to do a dry run at a club, and they loved it soâ€¦I signed a contract. When I saw you, I was going home to pack up my stuff. I have an apartment in West Hollywood that is in dire need of fine furnishings," he finished. Alec couldn't believe he heard right. Magnus was _moving _here? It was too good to be true.

"So, are you living in LA indefinitely?" he asked in a tentative tone.

"Well, they said it would be at least a year while I record an album, and do press and stuff like that," Magnus said. His eyes looked glazed over at the thought, and Alec was so proud of him in that moment. He was living his dream. "At the time, I was a little disappointed, and afraid because, honestly, I couldn't live in this town knowing you were here, and not being able to be with you. But nowâ€¦I might consider making this over-tanned town full of plastic Barbie's my home for a while." He smiled the most gorgeous smile then, and Alec couldn't help but think of the possibilities. It seemed like his life was finally taking a turn for the better, although it still seemed too good to be true. Without realizing it, he sucked his lower lip between his teeth, gnawing on it like he always did subconsciously.

"Hey," said Magnus, capturing his attention. "Share with the class." And then he leaned up and sucked Alec's bottom lip into his own mouth, causing a shiver to run down Alec's spine. He gave himself over to the kiss, and let the world fall away.

**Song for this section: Nothin' to Do by The Dandy Warhols (I like this song. It's carefree and upbeat and it makes no goddam sense lol)**

Magnus ended up staying an entire week and a half with Alec, putting off going home to pack up his stuff. Alec couldn't say he was complaining, but he knew Magnus needed to get his shit together, considering he was due in the studio to start writing tracks for his album in two more weeks. He needed to be moved in a settled by then so he could focus on the music. Alec had left him this morning to go to a doctor's appointment telling him he needed to pack up, and get going so he could hurry back. On the way back to his apartment, Alec could barely hold in his excitement. He felt like a small child, honestly, but he couldn't help it. He had good news for Magnus.

He unlocked the door to his apartment, and was immediately bombarded by Magnus belting it out to his ipod. When he walked in, he noticed that Magnus' suitcase was laying open on the bed, clothes strewn everywhere, not very different from how Alec had left him this morning. Magnus, on the other hand, was dancing around the room with a comb in his hand singing into it like a microphone. Alec couldn't help the smile that washed across his face at the sight. Magnus could be such a kid sometimes, and it really helped relieve stress to see him being so carefree. But he had to interrupt.

"Magnus!" he yelled over the music. Black hair was flying every which way as Magnus head-banged to the seventies-sounding tune. "Magnus!" he cried again, and finally got his boyfriend's attention.

"Yeah?" Magnus replied, turning off the music reluctantly, breathing hard.

"Hard at work, I see," Alec said as he came into the bedroom, smirking. Magnus' face fell and went red a little. Alec couldn't help but chuckle, it was so cute. "I'm just teasing. But seriously, you need to get a move on. We don't want to be late for our flight," he said.

"Yeah, I know. Wait, what?" Magnus asked, his eyes wide and staring.

"Hmm?" Alec said innocently.

"You said _our_ flight. As in, you and me. Does that meanâ€¦"

"Yup!" Alec couldn't hold it in anymore. "Doctor says I'm cleared to fly now! And he said I'm good to be without my cast! I just have to wear this little brace for another month or so." He held up the brace the doctor had given him, which was thin with metal stabilizers on the sides to keep his ankle in the right position. It was small enough to fit inside a shoe, so Alec could at least dress normally now. "And the best part is, after I get out of this thing, I can start training again. I might actually be able to play the last leg of the season. He said not to get my hopes up, but it's kind of impossible not to. Today is the best day ever!" he exclaimed like a little kid.

"Well, this calls for celebration!" Magnus said. He went over, and wrapped his arms around Alec, picking up him so that Alec could wrap his legs around his waist. Magnus fell backwards onto the bed, and Alec ravished his face with kisses. They were a couple of teenagers for a moment. But sooner or later, Alec saw reason. He pulled away gently.

"Not that I don't want to _celebrate_," he said with a dirty look that mirrored Magnus', "But we seriously do have a flight to catch. I'm going home with youâ€¦or rather, you're coming home with me," he said. Magnus grew quiet at the statement.

"Alecâ€¦"

"Okay, let me ask you something. You love me, right?" Alec asked.

"Of course I love you," was Magnus' answer.

"Okay," he said again. "Then, I want you to do me a favor." Magnus' eyebrows rose up. "I want you toâ€¦to come home with me, so I can introduce you to my parents. Asâ€¦as my boyfriend." There. It was out. That was the first step. Alec had to admit, his mother most likely already knew who Magnus was anyway considering she was a publicist, and knew just about everyone in New York. And he knew for a fact that she'd seen the photos, both timesâ€”the first ones from the hallway, and then the millions of photos that surfaced from the airport. But, he thought it was different for Alec to actually acknowledge it in person, to her face. And his father's. He hadn't spoken to his parents since the incident, but he was hoping they'd be sympathetic. They were liberal, forward thinking people. He hoped for the best.

"Alec, I'm honored that you want to finally acknowledge this for your family, butâ€¦" he trailed off. Alec was abruptly afraid. Did Magnus not want to meet his parents? Was he too forward in saying that Magnus was his boyfriend?

"What is it?"

"I justâ€¦we haven't talked too much about where we stand now. I mean, we really haven't allowed ourselves many situations to _talk_ inâ€¦" at this he smiled, and Alec blushed a bit. He knew what was coming, though. He'd thought about it himself over the past few days. "But we need to discuss this whole thing. Alec, you really freaked out on me. You completely pushed me out of your life because you were scared of people knowing the real you. You hurt me, Alec. And I know you just panicked, and you were afraid, but I have to know that you won't do it again. Because I was a mess without you. I don't think I could survive something like that again. You have to let me know that you mean it this time, that you are okay with your parents, and the rest of the world knowing." When he finished, he lay back and looked into Alec's eyes for an answer. Alec took a deep breath.

"I understand. And you will never know how sorry I am for what I did to you. The truth is, yes. It freaks me out a lot to actually say these things to my parents. But I've come to the realization that you are the most important thing in the world to me, and I'm willing to take whatever is thrown at us. I want you, and only you. I want to be with you. I want to hold your hand, and walk down Hollywood Boulevard. I want you to give a shout out to your awesome boyfriend Alec Lightwood when you win your first of many Grammys. I want to grow old with you. You're it for me. And whatever hate is thrown at us in the meantime, I'll know that I can turn to you and everything will be okay. Same goes for you. I love you with everything that I have, and I want the world to know. Starting with my family. For real."

Magnus was silent for a long moment. He looked like he was either about to cry or yell. Alec hoped it was the former, but he hoped that they were happy tears. He'd bared his heart, and he hoped it was received in good faith. He didn't have to worry for long, because Magnus let one single tear fall, and then pulled Alec back down to meet his lips. The kiss was deep, passionate, and filled with everything they couldn't say to each other in words.

When Magnus finally let him go, he looked up into Alec's baby blues. "Well, we should start packing. We have a plane to catch!" And with one last quick peck to Alec's cheek they got up, and started to do just that.


	41. Chapter 41

Magnus had never in his life been nervous to meet people. He usually welcomed it, the chance to meet a new face and learn about them. He was a social butterfly; it was in his very nature. But this? This was _way_ different. This was Maryse Lightwood.

Maryse Lightwood, he knew, was a publicist. She had her finger in absolutely everything in Hollywood/NYC/Miami/Chicago/etc. She was a mogul without even having her own clothing line. She was just that badass. Her cold stare induced chills in lesser men, and her quick wit never failed to leave someone foundering. She was a hard sort, driven and ambitious, and she always got her way. The media bowed down to her, producers took her suggestions, and countless actors, her headstrong, arrogant adopted son included, never questioned her judgment when she gave it, which was a lot. Her judgment was something to be feared, and her approval was sought after by all.

And Magnus Bane was about to endure both. Well, at least he was hoping against hope for the latter.

They were in a cab heading to the Upper East Side, their hands entwined tightly. This was mostly due to Magnus' growing apprehension with each block that drew them closer to the Lightwood mansion. He had seen the enormous piece of real estate before, and never really thought twice about its inhabitants. He kind of thought no one ever really lived in it anyway, considering they were such a jet-setting family. Alec's father, though not as overbearing and reputable as his wife, was a rather successful producer, and Alec said he tended to do most of his work overseas for huge movies like Lord of the Rings and Pirates of the Caribbean. Yes, Alec said, his father had had a hand in both of those. Magnus was astounded. It seemed that talent had fallen out of the sky and hit every damn branch of this family tree on the way down. Alec, however, said it was because his parents were good businesspeople, and they knew how to market themselves and their children.

"You know, you don't have to be this nervous. It's really me who should be sweating bullets right now. I haven't spoken to my parents since theâ€¦incident," Alec intoned softly.

Magnus turned to face him. "I just want to make a good impression. You're her first born, and well, I want her to know I'll take good care of you," Magnus replied.

"I'm pretty sure I can take care of myself. I'm a grown man, you know," Alec said with a chuckle, squeezing his boyfriend's hand reassuringly.

"Seriously though. Why aren't you nervous? Your mom is rumored to beâ€¦pretty tough," Magnus said delicately. Alec just smiled.

"I have no reason to be nervous with you by my side," he answered. Magnus raised an eyebrow.

"Why? Because you can use me as a human shield when she tries to behead you for not telling her all these years? For letting her find out from television and tabloids?"

"Of course not! I mean that, with you by my side, I feel confident and safe. I don't have to worry about being alone. I don't think I could have told her I was gay if I didn't have someone there to support me. I mean, Isabelle would do, but it's not the same. I love you, and telling her about you in the whole scheme of things just makes everything seem easier." With another squeeze of Magnus' hand, he let go and opened the door. Magnus hadn't even noticed they'd stopped.

As he slid out of the backseat of the cab, Magnus looked up at the looming figure of the Lightwood mansion. It seemed even bigger than the last time he'd driven past it. It was unbelievable and intimidating, even more so when he thought about what awaited him inside.

"Come on," Alec prodded as he tossed some bills at the driver, letting him depart. They'd gone straight to Magnus' old apartment (which Camille was in the process of moving into) to drop off their bags. They had taken about an hour to just settle from the long flight, and give Alec some time to rest, since the long flight in the same position had made his ankle swell up some. But now it was okay, and here they were, ready to face their fate. Alec grabbed his hand again, lacing their fingers together, and pulled him toward the door. As he punched in a combination on a keypad, Magnus took a deep breath that was supposed to be calming, but didn't really do its job.

A few minutes later, a tall, gray haired man that looked too likeable to work for such a haughty family swung the large door open with a smile. "Alexander! What a pleasure to have you back on your feet!" he cried, enveloping Alec in a fatherly hug. Magnus didn't recognize the man, but he knew it wasn't Robert Lightwood.

"Hodge, it's great to see you. Magnus, this is Hodge, my parents'â€¦well, their _everything_ really," he said with a chuckle. "Hodge, this isâ€”"

"Alexander, how could I not recognize this young man?" Hodge began slowly. Magnus felt his insides tighten. Hodge looked him up and down for a few tense moments. "I must say, the pictures do not do him justice. Isabelle did say you couldn't have found anyone handsomer, and so she stands confirmed. Welcome, Mr. Bane. It's a pleasure to have you," he said, and held out his hand. Magnus was startled for a moment, but reached out to take it. Hodge had a firm handshake, and Magnus couldn't help but think it was a precursor for what was to come. But he'd gotten the butler's approval, so that was a good sign, right? "Well, don't just stand here freezing on the stoop! Come in, come in!" And with that, they were swept into an impossibly large foyer, done up in glittering gold and cut crystal everywhere. The vase holding a bouquet of calla lilies, which sat on a mahogany table, was surely worth more than anything of that size that he owned. It was undoubtedly handmade and antique. He was mesmerized by the dÃ©cor, and instantly wanted to know their designer. But he kept his mouth shut, his mind coming back to the task at hand: he was about to have to put on his best face and impress the mother of the love of his life. A mother that everyone else in their right mind was terrified of.

Alec led him silently through the house to a room he assumed was the living room. It was immaculately white everywhere. He was abruptly afraid to sit down, since there was a chance he'd leave a glittery stain on the spotless couch. They took a seat on one of the beautiful sofas, Alec still holding his hand like he was the anchor to everything good. Once again, Magnus chastised himself. This was supposed to be Alec's big deal, not his. Alec was going to officially come out to his mother. It lessened the blow a little that she already knew, but she'd be hearing it from his lips for the first time. He looked sideways at his blue eyed beauty.

"Are you sure you're not scared at all?" he asked.

"I didn't say I wasn't scared. I said it was okay that I had you by my side. I'm actually terrified, but I choose to be relaxed because, well, I love you and everything will be alright in the end. I know it," Alec replied. Magnus was so touched by Alec's sincerity and confidence that he didn't notice when their hostess arrived in the room until Alec's eyes drew away from him to look into the archway.

Magnus had seen Maryse Lightwood in photos before. She looked intimidating even when she was a background figure in a three inch magazine photo. Needless to say, her physical prowess was magnified a thousand times over when he was in her presence. She was tall, like her son, standing about five foot ten. She had his and Isabelle's ebony hair, falling to just past her shoulder blades. She wore a smart business suit, black of course. She and her son were quite similar in that regard. She looked regal, yet fierce, and not just a little bit scary. She proceeded into the room like she was queen of her domain. Well, Magnus guessed that technically, she was. But he just couldn't get over how much she commanded a room. She sat down on the loveseat across from them, and Magnus was glad for the coffee table in between them. At least, maybe, he could use it as a shield if she decided to start throwing things, like the large crystal vase next to her on the end table.

He snuck a glance at Alec, and it did nothing to calm his nerves. For all his talk before, he looked like he was going to melt into a terrified puddle now. He took the chance to squeeze Alec's hand in what he hoped was a reassuring gesture, but Alec didn't seem to notice. He and his mother were staring each other down, and Magnus got the distinct feeling that they did this a lot while he was growing up. It seemed an implicit thing that they would wait for her to speak first. Magnus could practically feel his heart straining to vibrate out of his chest. He was hoping she couldn't tell. Was she like a wild cat that could smell fear? He didn't doubt it.

She was sitting back, seemingly at ease, but Magnus could tell by her face that her mood was tight. Finally, she spoke, and Magnus and Alec both tensed involuntarily.

"So, this is him?" she asked, raising an eyebrow in question. It was directed at Alec, but it took him a minute to respond.

"Yes, mother. This is Magnus Bane," Alec said, looking instinctively to his boyfriend. Magnus suddenly foundered, not knowing what to do. He simply smiled in her direction and hoped that was enough. He didn't think he could find it within himself to speak.

"I know _who_ he is, Alexander. But, he is a bit scrawnier than I imagined. However, I'm sure it's for good reason. Perhaps to fit into all those garish couture fashions they parade about in on the runways? Something tells me you get along extraordinarily well with my daughter." Her blue eyes were now directed at Magnus. He didn't know what to say, so he just nodded.

"I'm well aware that you do, actually. I did have to nip a rumor in the bud about the two of you, actually." Both boys were stunned, not having a clue what she meant. There was a rumor going around about Magnus and Isabelle?

"I had to convince a Dr. Cox not to blab a bit of misinformation. Seems he had seen the news and had it in his head that my eldest son has run off with my daughter's boyfriend. He was quick to shut his mouth; however, it cost me a very valuable eight minutes of phone conversation time." At this, Magnus barely bit back a snicker. He couldn't believe he had the capacity for humor at this point, but he'd forgotten about their little charade at the hospital, when Alec was supposed to still be in the closet. "I must say, that has Isabelle Elise Lightwood flash-quick-cover story written _all_ over it. My god, she could never survive my job," Maryse said, looking up and rolling her eyes at the ceiling. Yet, somehow, she still sounded affectionate when she spoke of her daughter. He could only hope this held to the situation at hand. She continued, "I do need to thank you, though, for going along with it in an effort to keep things under wraps for a bit longer. However, it seems that my son's reckless streak has finally come out, and you two got a little sloppy. It's about time Alexander _had_ a reckless streak, considering I always figured Jace had implicitly taken all his capacity to _be_ reckless. I just wish it could have been with something lessâ€¦sensitive."

At this, Alec finally spoke again. "Mom, I'm sorryâ€¦" he began, but she cut him off.

"Oh, no mister. I'm not letting you off that easy. You came all the way here for a reason, and I want to hear it from _you_. I don't care if I've seen it and heard it a thousand times already from tabloids, television, and coworkers. You're my son, and you should be able to tell me things," she said, and Magnus could have sworn she let a little hurt and affection creep into her voice by the end. She looked at her son expectantly, and Magnus followed her gaze.

Alec took a deep, calming breath, then he looked straight into her eyes. "Mom, I wanted to tell you thatâ€”that Iâ€”" but he was struggling to get it out. Magnus squeezed his hand again, and this seemed to steady him. "I'm gay. I've known for quite a while, and I'm sorry I never told you. I just didn't think you would love me anymore, and I knew you'd try to cover it up anyway, so I just did it for you and gave you one less stressor in your life. You do so much to keep this family in a good light in the press, and I didn't want to shatter it. I didn't want to be the disgrace. But now, I don't really know what's happened, but I don't want to hide anymore. Well, I do know what's happened. I met the person of my dreams," he said with conviction, turning to Magnus. Magnus couldn't help beaming at this phrase, because he felt the exact same way about Alec. For a moment, gazing in his love's eyes, he forgot that Alec's mother was even in the room. It was just them for that fleeting moment where Alec finally confessed it out loud. He'd done it in the airport, but that was for strangers. This was probably the one person in the entire world whose opinion mattered the absolute most. "Mom, I love him, and he's it for me. I hope you don't care that he's a guy, because you're stuck with him, I can tell you that."

Maryse Lightwood was silent for a moment, and Magnus doubted her son could even read her expression. But then, her face softened just a little, and she let that hurt tone creep back into her voice. "Why would you ever think I wanted to hide you? Baby, I love you, no matter what or who you are." Alec stiffened next to him, and Magnus expected that the 'baby' sentiment was not something a woman like Maryse said often. "And as for this one," she said, turning her attention on Magnus, "I'm perfectly fine with being 'stuck' with him. As long as he knows not to break your heart, but something tells me I don't need to make that speech. Your brother will do it for me." At this, she moved to stand. Magnus didn't know whether to stand with her or stay seated. He followed Alec's lead, his rear remaining glued to the couch. It seemed the conversation was over. He was right, Maryse Lightwood wasn't one for affection. Once she'd said her piece, she was done. She wasn't one to make unnecessary small talk, and he could appreciate that. She left the room without another word, leaving the two lovers in silence. Magnus felt Alec let out a huge breath. He turned to face Magnus with a relieved look painted across his features.

"That wentâ€¦better than expected," he said finally.

"What exactly _did_ you expect?" Magnus asked curiously.

"Yelling. Complete Silence. Whichever was worse. Not that."

"Well, just be thankful, I guess. What now?" Magnus wondered.

**Song for this section: Chop and Change by The Black Keys (gritty and sexy, perfect fit lol)**

"It seems I'm in an undeniably good mood. How about you?" Alec said, and Magnus' body reacted to the seductive tone in his voice.

"Can't say I'm not in a rather chipper mood myself. What were you planning on doing in this situation?"

"A situation like this calls for some sort of celebration," Alec said in a low voice. Again, Magnus' body responded. Alec almost never initiated things. At least, not in this seductive manner. But, Magnus had shared a very intimate part of himself with Alec recently, and it was dawning on him that Alec had paid attention. It wasn't that Magnus wanted to be dominated _all the time_, but having Alec take initiative and attempt to pull him into one of his fantasies really got him going. Just as he was thinking about being dominated by Alec, his boyfriend's hand slipped from his, and traveled to his wrist, gripping with force. The sensation of authority went straight to Magnus' crotch.

All of a sudden, Alec shot up and pulled Magnus with him. Their lips crashed together violently and the vibrations of Alec's moans went all the way down to Magnus' toes.

When their lips parted, Alec breathed into the space between them, "You know, Izzy and Jace always brought their dates home and I always had to sit in my room and envy them. I never got to christen this house myself."

"What exactly are you implying, lover?"

"I'm implying that I'm horny," Alec shot back, but Magnus could see it took a bit of effort to inject that dirty tone into his voice. Alec was trying, and that was all he could ask for.

"Well, lead the way, beautiful," Magnus returned, planting one more solid kiss on Alec's ready lips. When they parted, Alec yanked his wrist, guiding him toward the grand staircase they'd passed as they walked in. This place really was phenomenal. Magnus could only imagine actually growing up here. His mother had had money, but she'd kept it hidden. He hadn't had a poor life, just an extremely normal one. Besides the obvious.

They barreled down a long hallway lined with what were probably priceless originals. Magnus couldn't help but comment. "These are really beautiful. You're mom has an eye for good art."

"I honestly think that's why Clary is still with Jace. She just likes to come here and stare at the hallways."

"Wait, that little artist girl, the redhead, is still putting up with your brother?" Magnus asked, incredulous that Jace Lightwood, player extraordinaire, had held on to one girl all this time.

"Yup. But seriously, I really, _really_, don't want to talk about my brother right now," Alec pleaded over his shoulder as he hauled Magnus down yet another winding hallway. One could really get lost in this place.

"Noted," Magnus answered. He couldn't agree more. Finally, Alec had started to slow down. He picked a door that was almost at the stop of a dead end, yanking the handle and letting out a surprised noise when he found it unlocked. That was odd, Magnus thought. But then, as he entered the chosen room, he sort of understood. He'd thought Alec would take him to his bedroom, but instead they'd entered a posh office, decorated in rich blackwood and leather bound books. There were two desks. One was nestled against a wall and looked decidedly used. There were papers neatly stacked in piles around the perimeter, and a large Mac screen resting in the center. The other, however, stood staunchly in the middle of the room and was sparsely adorned. It only held two photo frames (containing pictures of Maryse and Robert Lightwood, and the three children, looking about 10 years younger), and a large, full desk calendar.

"Alec," Magnus chuckled. "An office? Seems you have some kinks of your own," he said as he looked around.

"It's not really like that," Alec offered as he pulled Magnus to him, shutting the door and turning the lock with a resounding click. "This is my mom's office. It's also the only room in the entire house that is completely sound-proof. She doesn't like to be bothered," he explained at the last minute. His nervousness at doing this in his parents' house was apparent, but Magnus could still tell he was trying to come out of his shell. Magnus could definitely appreciate it, although he never really wanted Alec to lose that innocence that lingered in his baby blues. This was a happy medium.

"Well, I plan to take full advantage," Magnus said. He pushed his hips up against Alec's in a pointed movement, and ground them into his boyfriend, eliciting a lovely pleasurable sound from Alec's throat. Alec moved his hips in kind, and proceeded to press Magnus back into the door. His hand came up stealthily to twine into Magnus' gelled hair, causing it to pull and tug. Magnus let out an animal growl at the painful sensation that elicited such pleasure inside him. He didn't like to think of himself as a full-blown submissive, but he got off on being manhandled. He would also have never thought Alec would be willing to reciprocate, but here he was, pushing him around and pulling his hair and being generally demanding in an illegally sexy way.

After a few minutes of heated tongue action against the thick mahogany door, Alec's hands ghosted down to wrap around Magnus' waist, snaking up under his black v-neck tshirt. The feel of those heated fingers on bare skin pulled more strangled moans from both of them as Alec started pulling Magnus toward the center of the room. Magnus' mouth was now latched onto the crook of Alec's neck and he was sucking way too hard not to leave a mark. He didn't really care. There was makeup for that kind of thing.

They worked their way to the middle of the room, Alec's ass bumping up against the large desk situated there. Magnus was still nipping and sucking at the salty skin of Alec's neck when he heard a broken gasp.

"Take me, Magnus. Take me again," he pleaded. The way Magnus' name slipped out of those swollen red lips caused every last ounce of blood to race to his ever growing erection. It was almost too much. He'd known Alec would like bottoming as soon as he'd tried it, but he didn't think it would be something he begged for all the time. Magnus literally thought it would be a once in a while thing. But now, with this gorgeous athlete's strong arms pulling him closer and his ragged voice begging to be _taken_â€¦well, he didn't have to be told twice. Although, there were some hitches in this roadâ€¦

"You sure, baby? I don't have any of the necessary accoutrement," he said against Alec's clavicle, where he'd worked the collar of Alec's shirt down and proceeded to bite at the thin pale skin there.

One of Alec's rippling biceps left his waist, and he dug into his pocket. He pulled out a small packet, no more than an ounce of liquid inside. But it was clear what it was. Magnus stared.

"Presumptuous much?" he teased. On the inside, however, he was reeling. Alec had actually taken the time to put a packet of lube in his pocket before they'd left Magnus' old flat. Magnus knew it was from his stash, since he recognized it. Alec must have rooted through his bedroom drawers while he was in the bathroom or something. That naughty minx. He was going to get it for this. At his statement, Alec's brow just cocked for a second in invitation, as if to say, 'are you turning it down now?' Well, he most certainly was _not_.

He reached down and yanked the packet from Alec's palm, said palm snaking back up into Magnus' hair to tug and pull forcefully while he pulled Magnus' lips down to his. A tongue forcefully entered his mouth, probing and massaging. Alec pulled back a second to say "Please, Magnus. _Please_," and Magnus just about died. Then, Alec's lips were back on his. He bit down on Magnus' lower lip, causing him to groan in pleasure. But they'd have to stop this for a second if they were going to get things moving along.

Magnus pulled away and his already rock hard erection twitched at the whimper that came from Alec. But Alec got the picture. He reached back and swiftly deposited the calendar from the desk onto the floor, followed by the two picture frames. The surface now free, Magnus pushed him back so he was lying flat on the desk. As soon as he was down, Alec picked his legs up and wrapped them around Magnus' hips and pulled him in for another long pull at the lips. When he was released again, Magnus unbuttoned his extremely tight jeans and shoved them down just enough so that his aching hardness sprung free. Alec did the same, pushing his jeans and underwear down below his hips and kicking them down as far as he could get them. Magnus pulled Alec's pants and boxers off of his left leg, but left them dangling on the other side. This was in his mother's office, for god's sake, and it was going to be quick and dirty. When Alec made to sit up and take his shirt off, Magnus stopped him.

"No, leave it. I just want you," he said.

"God, Magnus. Hurry up. I want you too, damnit," Alec whined, lying back and letting out a frustrated sigh.

"You know, there's not enough in here for me to use to prepare you at allâ€¦" Magnus began.

"I don't give a shit. Just shut up and fuck me, Magnus. _Please_," he begged, yet again. This was getting ridiculous. Where had sweet innocent Alec gone and who was this wanton beauty before him?

"God, quit saying my name like that. It's killing me," Magnus breathed.

"How do you want me to say it, then?" Alec shot back. Oh, feisty now, are we?

By now, Magnus had successfully ripped open the small packet of lube and squeezed out the contents onto his godlike erection. He positioned himself at Alec's quivering entrance and leaned down over him. He took on of Alec's knees and threw it over his shoulder while Alec whimpered away. He leaned down close to his lover's ear, blowing hot breath against it.

"I want you to scream it. Rightâ€¦now." And he thrust into Alec with so much force, the athlete skidded backwards on the slick surface of the desk.

"Ah, GOD MAGNUS!" he wailed, just like Magnus wanted him to.

"That's what I'm talking about," Magnus said with a smirk. He pulled out pretty slow, but not as slow as he would have liked. He really, really wanted to tease and taunt Alec for doing the same to him, but he could control himself. He remembered how tight Alec was from the first time, and this time was no different. He could literally feel Alec's pulse as his walls contracted around him.

"Fuck, please Magnus, fuck me," he whispered. Alec was gripping Magnus' tshirt so hard, he knew there would be prominent wrinkles. He didn't care; they'd just be proof of their naughty deed. It made Magnus smile.

"You sure you can handle it?" he asked, just to be sure. After all, this was only the second time. He asked this as he thrust back in a little less forcefully than the first time.

"Magnus," was all Alec said, and it was with that greedy, wanton seductiveness that he'd been using all this time. It made Magnus want to literally claim him for his own. So he did.

He abandoned the pretense of going slow, opting to thrust firmly into Alec. He did, however, hold back from going as hard as he possibly could. He knew there were limits Alec didn't know he had, and he wasn't choosing now to test those. But he was giving Alec a fair good pounding, and his lover seemed to be enjoying it.

"Fuck, Magnus. Youâ€¦feel soâ€¦it's soâ€¦.nnghâ€¦so bigâ€¦" he stuttered in between loud moans as his body was tossed back and forth from the force. Magnus sure hoped this room was sound proof, since Alec could wake the dead with his racket.

Magnus reached down between them and grabbed Alec's straining cock, leaning up to get enough room. He began to pump him slowly, creating a rift between the force of his thrusts and the timing of his hand. He looked up to see Alec's eyes rolling back, and it was the most glorious sight he'd ever seen. Who would have thought that Alexander Lightwood, star scorer for the LA Galaxy, would be here, writhing and whimpering beneath Magnus Bane on his own mother's desk? The tabloids thought they hit a field day when they caught them kissing. If they only knew.

As Magnus continued to thrust and Alec continued to whine and swear and yell Magnus' name in the sexiest pleading voice, his hand began to move faster and his thrusts grew less rhythmic.

"Oh, god Magnus, I'mâ€¦I'mâ€¦soâ€¦" Alec whined, his eyes still rolled into his head and his hands behind him gripping the edge of the desk above his head to keep from slipping off.

"I know, baby. Me too," Magnus ground out. He pumped Alec harder and faster, pulling him towards release. He watched Alec's facial expressions, gauging how much he seemed to be holding back. He took pity on him finally. "Come," he commanded, and in the next instant, his hand was covered in thick white, dripping down over his fingers. Alec's orgasm shook and contracted his whole body, and Magnus felt the tightness clench around him. It only took one more firm thrust to the hilt, and then he was coming so hard he had to lean over and put his hands on either side of Alec's head to keep from collapsing on his weakened knees. He wasn't sure how long they stayed there, but by the time he got the strength to stand up and pull out slowly, his back was chilled because of the drying sweat there.

He pulled his jeans back up from their position on his thighs. He was right, this had been quick and dirty, but that's what made it sexy. He'd never pegged Alec to be a quickie kind of guy, but he never ceased to surprise Magnus. As Alec slowly sat up, wincing, and moved to stand, Magnus noticed how shaky his knees were. He chuckled a little before he reached an arm out to steady his thoroughly sexed over boyfriend. Alec smiled at him through the furious blush that had crept up his pale cheeks. He leaned down and pulled his pants and boxers up slowly, finally buttoning them and standing fully upright. The look on his face was pure after-sex-bliss. Magnus couldn't help it, and planted a long, slow kiss on his lips right then. When he released him, he looked at the desk and noted the drying sweat outline on it's smooth, expensive surface and smiled wickedly to himself.

"Well, now you can say you christened the house for yourself," he said. Alec laughed.

"Yeah. I guess so."

"You can brag to the two players of the family, now that you're on their playing field," Magnus chuckled.

"Oh, man. No I don't think I couldâ€¦brag to them aboutâ€¦this kind of thing," Alec said, that blush growing even more bright.

"Well, did they ever brag to you?" Magnus asked.

"All the time. You know that couch we were sitting on downstairs? Jace had one of those chicks from Gossip Girl half naked on it one time when I came home. The brunette one, I think. I don't remember."

Magnus laughed out loud, heading toward the door. "Okay, that was a little TMI, but seriously you are entitled to bedroom brag after that one," he said. "Plus, I'm betting he's not all that. I'm betting Leighton Meester wasn't screaming like that when she was with himâ€¦" he trailed off, looking sideways at Alec as they walked down the hall. Now, Alec's face was almost the color of a tomato. It was adorable, and he didn't think he'd ever get used to it.


	42. Chapter 42

Magnus didn't really know what to expect from Alexander Lightwood's bedroom. Everything in its neat little places, perhaps. Maybe some unread books lying around, a generic blue bedspread, that sort of thing. So he was surprised to see that, upon first inspection, it looked much different than any imagining he would've had. For one, the bedspread was all black, but had yellow piping. Subtle, though it was, the throw pillows gave Alec away. They looked hand-sewn, and they were black, bearing a bright yellow Batman emblem right in the center. Magnus bit back a chuckle without much success. Alec cut his eyes sideways at him, but a smirk was playing at the edges of his lips.

"I've always had a thing for Batman. I don't really know why," he offered.

"Well, I'll admit George Clooney does have a nice set of pecs," Magnus said, picturing the actor, and staring off into space with a sigh.

"Oh, hell no." At this, Magnus turned to face him. "Michael Keaton will always be my Batman. Although, I do agree with you on the Clooney assessment," he said casually.

"Okay, I'll admit Keaton did play him the best, but you _have_ to admit, Dr. Ross was the sexiest dark knight," Magnus said.

"Gotta disagree. That would have to be Val Kilmer," Alec replied with an air of finality. They stood in silence for a couple of seconds before Magnus saw Alec visibly tense.

"What? What's wrong?" he asked, concerned.

But Alec relaxed a little, and tried for a smile. "I've never done that before," he said quietly, mostly to himself.

"Done what?"

"Talked about theâ€¦physical aspectsâ€¦of other men before. I mean, out loud. With someone else. Huh," he shrugged to himself. Magnus hadn't thought of it that way. He supposed Alec never had occasion to discuss the sexual appeal of men with anyone before. Magnus, for most of his life had always been so completely comfortable in his skin that he just kind of went with it, and it slipped out. In college, he'd had a couple of gay friends that he could talk boys with. And, most recently he always had Camille. No conversation with her was without the usual rating of the abs of various stars. But Alec had never had that. Magnus liked that he was becoming more and more comfortable in his skin enough to casually talk about things like that, even though he never had before. He was even a tad bit proud. On impulse he leaned in, and placed a sweet kiss on the side of Alec's neck from his place beside him in the doorway. It made Alec jump at first, but a second later he snaked his hand around Magnus' waist and pulled him close, side-hugging him. He offered a small, embarrassed smile. It was adorable.

"So!" Magnus began. "Are you going to show me around properly or what?" he asked.

"Coincidentally, I've never had occasion to do that, either," Alec said sheepishly.

"You've never shown someone your room before? I mean, like, a date or anything?"

"No."

"Not evenâ€¦that girl?" Magnus said cautiously, referring to the girl Alec had told him about so long ago, the one he dishonestly lost his virginity to.

"Oh, Amy? No. Weâ€¦always met at her house. I never brought her here."

"Why not?" Magnus asked.

Alec thought for a moment. "Well, I guess I didn't want Jace to steal her," he said laughingly, and Magnus relaxed. Clearly, he wasn't over it, but if he could laugh about it, that was good.

"Okay, well, I'm honored to be your first for something non-sexual for a change," he said. Alec blushed furiously, but smiled again. "Lead the way!"

"Actually, I'm going to go hunt down Hodge real quick. Feel free to explore at your leisure," he said. "I don't _think_ there's anything incriminating in here. Nothing that _you_ of all people wouldn't know about anywayâ€¦" he trailed off with a knowing smile that knocked the breath right out of Magnus. This man was simply gorgeous. He mentally damned Camille for not talking about her athlete crushes sooner than she had that night at Cherry Bomb.

Alec placed a chaste kiss on Magnus' lips, remaining for longer than was absolutely necessary, but not getting a complaint from Magnus in the least. He released him, gave him a loving look, and disappeared down the hallway, leaving Magnus to his own devices in his boyfriend's childhood bedroom. It really wasn't a true representation of him right now since he was sure Alec hadn't actually lived in this room for more than a few days at a time since he moved to LA, with the exception of the three weeks he was in NYC when they met. It did look more like a young boy's room that had kind of morphed into a teen's, but didn't quite make the full transition.

The walls, for one, were predictable though Magnus didn't think anyone could have _that_ many trophies. Shelves lined almost every inch of available wall space on three sides, and they were all full of gold and bronze trophies of all shapes and sizes. He strolled up to one of the little galleries, and gazed at the display. Each one had a figurine of some form kicking a soccer ball affixed to the top, and each had a different inscription. _MVP: UES Junior Club, 2001. Top Scorer, Hilchon Tournament, 2004. Player of the Year, Mansford Prep, 2006. _There were at least fifty around the entire room. This kid was like Sue Sylvester. Magnus thought it was funny seeing as how Jace was the more celebrated son in the press, yet Alec had immense talent and prowess of his own. While Jace had grown up doing commercials and the occasional sitcom, Isabelle graced ads for soda and worked her way up to couture, Alec had been running across fields nonstop since the age of 5. Magnus was impressed, and his heart swelled with pride for his boyfriend.

He continued around the room, coming to one of the two bookshelves that flanked the bed. Scanning the titles, he came across a few that he liked a lot. He was surprised they shared literary interest, considering sometimes Magnus' choice in books was a little left of center. He came across Atlas Shrugged, Slaughterhouse-Five, The Merchant of Venice, Catch-22, andâ€¦was that? Yes! Harry Potter, the full series. This man just got more loveable by the second. Magnus' eye fell to the shelf below eye level and found (surprise!) a full collection of Batman comics. He was kind of surprised that none had plastic covers on them. He liked picturing Alec as a comic book nerd; it was cute.

He made his way around the adorable, yet somewhat sophisticated looking bed. If a Batman themed bed could be said to be sophisticated, Alec had accomplished it. He found the matching bookshelf on the other side held a couple more trophies, these smaller from his elementary school days (he really had played soccer his entire life), and lots of pictures. His eyes scanned through the photos. A few were of him and Isabelle, looking about 12 and 13. One of them pictured the pair blowing bubbles from carrot shaped bottles at Easter. Another showed them at about 15 and 16, Alec in an orange and blue uniform, looking very sweaty and tired and Isabelle not minding in the least. She had her hand around his waist tightly, both putting up "#1" signs with their fingers.

There were also photos of Alec and his brother, most of them from when they were very young. There was one in which both were covered from the knees down in grass stains, with mud on their faces. It looked to have been taken at a lake house of some sort. There was also one of them from much more recently, about 3 years ago, at one of Jace's premieres. Magnus had to admit, Alec looked downright fuckable in his silver Carolina Herrera suit. Magnus had coveted that suit that season, but it just wouldn't look right with his tanned complexion. On Alec, however, the sheen set off his pale skin and bottle glass blue eyes to perfection. He imagined that, to most people, the golden hued boy in the black tux and skinny tie would be the shining star of this photo, but not to Magnus. He was drawn to the real beauty of the older, dark haired one.

The pictures that featured the three children together were all the same. There were three, one at each of their high school graduations. They all graduated from Mansford Prep on the Upper East Side, of course. Alec looked at ease in two of them, but at his own graduation, he looked tense and embarrassed. Alec never did like being the center of attention, and it showed. It made Magnus smile and trace his face in the photograph affectionately.

After replacing the picture on the shelf carefully, something flashed in the sunlight coming through the window, and caught his eye. It was nestled between the wall and the bookcase, and looked to be covered in dust. He reached into the crevice, and pulled out one of the most beautiful instruments he'd ever seen. It was an old Collings SJ acoustic, all maple, the face a beautifully immaculate sunburst. It had gold tuners, and virtually pristine strings. He'd never seen a guitar this old this well taken care of, except in museums. It must be a good thirty years old, from Bill Collings' earlier days. The back was engraved with R.L. He held it gingerly, admiring its beauty, until he heard a noise at the door.

* * *

When Alec returned from his talk with Hodge (which, he would admit, was really just an excuse to not be awkward while Magnus explored his room), he strode through the doorway, and sighed affectionately. Leave it to Magnus to find the only musically related thing in this room. At his sound, Magnus turned to face him, looking guilty.

"What?" Alec said, coming into the room.

Magnus foundered a minute before he spoke. "Sorry, I didn't mean to touch it. It's just so _pretty_," he said, sounding like he was talking about the Hope Diamond or something, like it was a priceless treasure that shouldn't be handled. Alec guessed Magnus knew a lot more about guitars than he did.

"It's okay, Magnus," he said with a small laugh. "Actually, you probably would handle it better than I did. I just shoved it in the corner."

Magnus held it gingerly, dusting off the back where the initials were. Robert had always wanted him to learn how to play, but he just didn't have the discipline to sit still and learn an instrument. He was that kid who was always out running around, and getting sweaty. He didn't want to pick up a hunk of wood, and strum it for hours; it just wasn't in his nature. This was probably why he could appreciate Magnus' expertise so much. It was so foreign to him how someone could develop such prowess with an instrument like that.

"It was my dad's. He always wanted me to learn, but I was too busy with soccer to sit down, and put my mind to it," he offered.

"It's gorgeous. And rare," Magnus breathed. Alec looked at his face, and could read the envy there. He took pity on his boyfriend as Magnus made to put the instrument back in its place in the corner.

"No," he said quickly. Magnus held on to the neck, hovering the guitar in mid-air, waiting for Alec to elaborate. His face looked so hopeful, it was heart wrenching. Alec knew what he wanted. "Go ahead. I know you want to," he said with a smile.

"What, play it? I couldn'tâ€¦" Magnus said, though he eyed the guitar affectionately.

"Come on. Honestly, I'm just looking for an excuse to listen to you. Think of it as appeasing me instead of giving in to the greed I see in your face," he said with a chuckle. The way Magnus' eyes lit up made Alec's heart swell. He watched as Magnus took a seat on the edge of the bed and cautiously rested the instrument on his knee. He strummed experimentally.

"It's in perfect tune. Have you really never touched it?" he asked.

"Once or twice. I can play, like, two chords. That's it," Alec replied. He moved to sit on the floor in front of Magnus. "Go on," he urged with an expectant gaze.

"What?"

"I enjoy your private serenades. I've only had a couple, but they're always worth the wait, and this one is well overdue," Alec said, smiling up at his boyfriend. "So pick a good one."

"Well, there's one that reminds me a lot of you. More so in recent weeks. Well, before _very_ recently at least."

"Okay, let's hear it."

"You'll have to bear with me; it's usually played on a banjo," Magnus said, rambling.

Alec's eyes widened a fraction in surprise. "Well, I never pegged Magnus Bane for a bluegrass fan," he stated.

"Shut up. It's not really bluegrass. It's more country. But you knowâ€”"

"Magnus?"

"Hmm?"

"Quit stalling." Alec was trying to hold back a smirk, and he wasn't very good at it. Magnus got the picture though, and strummed a few more times; finding the key he wanted. Then, he started to play a haunting melody.

_More wishes than a thousand hearts can count for you_

_More smiles than a merry-go-round_

_The sweetest ending to a bedtime story told_

_My love follows you where you go_

His voice stayed soft and sweet, and Alec loved it when he sang like this. Yes, the power behind those pipes could fill a room up with bouncing sound, but hearing it pulled back and vulnerable was just as captivating.

_More laughter than a kindergartener out to play_

_One Sunday morning song that says it all_

_More summer than the California beach can hold_

_My love follows you where you go_

_Future like a promise, your city of gold_

_Stubborn in your bones and Jesus in your soul_

_Seeing you stand there, staring at the unknown_

_I won't pretend that it's not killing me, watching you walk away slow_

His playing was fluid and sound, the notes working up and down the scale in a smooth, fluent rhythm. Alec was always mesmerized by Magnus' piano playing, but watching his fingers move over the strings of a guitar held something different and raw. Where he looked regal and sophisticated when his long fingers caressed ivory keys, he looked soulful and stripped down as he strummed the old guitar. He almost looked like he was afraid to hurt it, the way he held it so lightly, but his hands worked the melody out perfectly.

_Take forgiveness, take a prayer, take the deepest breath_

_And take the answers in your heart_

_When you wake up and the world is cruel and cold_

_My love follows you where you go_

_Future like a promise, your city of gold_

_Stubborn in your bones and Jesus in your soul_

_Seeing you stand there, staring at the unknown_

_I won't pretend that it's not killing me, watching you walk away slow_

_More freedom than a field of flowers in the wind_

_More beauty than a morning after the rain_

_Up the steepest hill, a dark and crooked road_

_My love follows you where you go_

As he flowed into the chorus again, Alec watched with love as Magnus got that look on his face that he always got when he sang, like there was no one else on the planet but him and his voice. Alec could tell that music was literally the one thing that made him truly the happiest, and he couldn't fathom what Magnus' life had been like while he avoided it like the plague. He was so utterly thankful to whatever higher power had forced him out of his shell because this was a precious gift to be shared with the world. He played for a few more seconds after the last chorus was finished, and Alec found himself lost in the sweet sounds Magnus pulled from the instrument. When it was over, he opened his eyes and saw Magnus staring at him with such a loving expression, his heart stuttered in his chest. Magnus gently placed the guitar on the bed and slid down to the floor. The two sat, crossed legged like children, and shared a long, slow kiss.

Neither of them was aware that they'd had an audience for more than half the song. And now, as she watched them share such a private love-filled moment, she swiped away a stray tear that no one would ever know about. Finally, after all these years of wondering when he was going to find himself, her son was genuinely happy.


	43. Chapter 43

"It's not going to fit, Magnus."

"What do you _mean_, it's not going to fit? It HAS to!" He cried.

"What are the dimensions of the living room again?" Camille asked, calling on every last bit of her patience. He read the numbers back to her for the fourth time. She gazed down at the tape measure draped across the smooth white surface of Magnus' most prized piece of furniture. "It's fourteen inches too long. It. Will. Not. Fit. End of story, Magnus."

Her best friend laid his head down on the closed cover of the piano and draped his arms over it, presumably trying to hug the huge instrument in desperation. "Noooooâ€¦" he whined, feigning sounds of crying. He looked up at her with a pouty face. "What about the bedroom?" He read her the dimensions, saying that indeed it was big enough.

"Yeah, it'll fit. Barely. But only if you put the bench by the door so you can actually sit down at it, because you won't be able to walk around it at all. Don't even think about putting so much as an endtable in there with it, much less a bed. Where would you sleep?" she went on, still trying to hold on to her patience. She loved Magnus, but sometimes he wouldn't see reason. This happened when it came to sentimental things.

He looked at her with a hopeful expression. "On the couch?" he offered, but his heart wasn't really in it. He sighed a little too dramatically for her taste, and put on the pouty expression again, sticking out his bottom lip like a 2 year old. She rolled her eyes, but couldn't help the smile that played at the edges of her lips. She was seriously going to miss her friend. She'd had her little bout of crying and hugging with him already, but it still hadn't fully hit her yet that he was leaving.

"Face it, babe. You'll have to part with it for a while. Just get a smaller one, okay?" she tried to console him, coming around to his side of the piano and putting her arms around his shoulders, kissing his temple. She was internally happy, however, that he was pitching this fit. At least he'd finally found reason to use it and now he couldn't bear to part with it. Trying to change the subject before he actually started weeping, she said, "So, are you both going to be living in this condo? Because, sweetie," she said, looking over to where Magnus' adorable boyfriend had his striking athletic body languidly draped across the couch, "I'm just warning you, you aren't going to have an inch of closet space. Not even for uniforms." Alec (this is what Magnus called him, so she'd adopted it gradually; the media always called him Alexander still) looked up from a re-run of Cake Boss with an uneasy expression.

"I think we're going to maintain separate living quarters for the moment," Magnus said smoothly, bending down to scoop up Chairman Meow into their little hug. "I don't think he'll be able to stand me while I write twenty-four seven, and I honestly need time to get used to the idea of having a sweaty jock around my house all the time before it actually happens," he added playfully. The truth was, they had discussed it. They'd decided that they would refrain from moving in together just yet, since truthfully they'd had a rocky relationship so far, and they wanted to take things as slow as the situation allowed. They wouldn't spend less time together, per se, but they each decided they wanted to retain a little of their bachelor-ness. It would give Magnus time to get used to the change of location, and Alec time to get used to publicly having a boyfriend without taking it too far. Besides, the pretense of living together would kind of be destroyed for the next few months anyway, since Alec was attending practice all day, keeping up with plays and such from the bench. Magnus would also need privacy and quiet to write, and then he would constantly be in the studio recording. Even if they did live together, they'd spend no more time together than they would if they remained separate.

This statement seemed to put Alec at ease and he turned back to the TV. "Yeah, that and I really do need some closet space. Isabelle brought me shopping twice already and mine's overflowing already. Not that I'll wear all of it anyway," he trailed off.

"Well, you have a ready receptacle for all your cast offs," Camille said, squeezing Magnus, her arms still wrapped around him, leaning against the piano. He smiled up at her and she heard Alec chuckle. She released her friend, looking around the room. It was littered everywhere with boxes full of random things. The walls were bare, the art and books from the shelves already packed up and ready to be shipped to LA. In Magnus' bedroom, his suitcases were open and overflowing with clothes, accessories, hair products, and makeup. Their flight was the day after tomorrow, and he was packing up everything he wasn't leaving in her care.

She was glad he asked her to live here when he left. She had already given up her old apartment and had been living here since Magnus had told her the news. The dÃ©cor at the moment was a mishmash of their stuff, but Magnus was now taking all his things with him, and it would be officially hers. Admittedly, she had always loved this penthouse, and they had lots of fun memories here. She was going to miss him dearly, but she knew she'd see him sometimes. She'd already said she was coming to at least five of his tour dates. He'd just laughed.

The possibility of a tour had also settled another issue: Chairman Meow. Although he was probably Magnus' closest friend besides Camille, the two had decided that the Chairman would remain in New York with her. After much coaxing and reasoning, she'd made Magnus see that if he was going to be in a studio all day, Meow would be left alone for too many hours. And then, if Magnus went on a tour, well, what would he do with the small cat then? Alec couldn't take him; he'd always be at practice. It was logical that Meow stay here indefinitely, or at least until their living situation in LA was more stable.

"Okay, well, I'm going to catch dinner with Tess. Don't enjoy my new couch _too_ much, 'kay?" she said teasingly. Magnus had let her get rid of his pink couch in favor of a deep blue one she'd had her eye on for ages, but would never fit in her apartment. It was basically the size of a twin bed, and comfy as hell. In fact, she kind of envied Alec right now, looking all blissed out and sleepy, his thin white tshirt hinting at the rock hard abs underneath. She could imagine what it would be like to run her fingers over them, when he was all sweaty and glistening. He probably made gorgeous sex sounds. _And I'm mentally lusting after my best friend's boyfriend. My _gay_ best friend's boyfriend. Stop it, Camille._ She had friend obligations to tend to. She had figured she better start _really_ cultivating her other friendships, since she couldn't be attached to Magnus' side anymore.

"Oh, we'll christen it properly, don't worry," Magnus shot back at her. She gave him a warning look, and he just laughed, pecking her on the cheek. She strode to the elevator, the door closing behind her, leaving the two alone.

* * *

Magnus went over to the couch, sitting down and draping Alec's feet across his lap. He picked up the one that was usually in the small brace. Alec had taken it off as soon as he'd hit the couch two hours ago when Magnus and Camille had started packing things up. It's not that Alec was lazy and wouldn't help; Magnus just had a way about things and certain things were supposed to be packed together and Camille knew what he was talking about. Alec had just laughed and shrugged, then parked his tight rear on Camille's ridiculously comfy new couch. With his foot out of the brace, Magnus handled it gently. Alec was supposed to exercise it regularly, in order to gain his strength back in it.

"You okay?" he asked.

"Yeah, it's fine," Alec said, looking up at him. Magnus turned his foot in slow circles, sometimes massaging the bottom, sometimes just rolling the ankle joint. When Alec winced a tiny bit, he put it down and picked up the other one. "It's okay, Magnus," Alec assured him. "It's supposed to still hurt. If it didn't I'd be on the field. In fact, it's the only reason I'm not yet. Ugh, I can't _stand_ not playing. I feel like a lard-ass," he pouted. Magnus just smiled. As if this hard, muscled up Adonis could possibly be considered fat.

"Shut up. You know you're sexy as hell," Magnus retorted, making Alec blush the most beautiful pink carnation shade across his cheekbones. It was disarming. "You hungry?" he asked.

"Only for sweets," Alec said, his face turning back to the television, still on Cake Boss. "Which, again, makes me a lard-ass." But he laughed.

"If you take it back, I'll make you a sundae."

Alec perked up adorably. "I take it back, I take it back! I'm sexy as hell. Now ruin it with ice cream please!" he pleaded with a childish smile that Magnus couldn't have resisted if he tried. He just chuckled and slid Alec's feet off of him. As he made his way to the kitchen, Alec picked up the remote and shut the TV off, turning on the stereo. As he strode through kitchen archway, Magnus laughed to himself. "What?" Alec asked.

"Did you know, when I went to audition for the label, this was the first song I sang?"

"The first one? It took them more than one to decide they liked you? That's impossible."

"Oh, I got through half the first verse and they stopped me. Apparently, I suck at imitating Joan," he laughed. Of course, they'd just wanted to hear original work, not something he just arbitrarily chose. He could understand that. But he still liked joking about it. He started singing along with the stereo as he pulled out the ingredients for caramel sundaes.

He went around the kitchen, grabbing two small bowls, the coffee flavored ice cream from the freezer, the caramel sauce and whipped cream from the fridge. He called into the living room, "Do you like nuts?"

"You should know by now that I do," came a low voice right beside his ear, making him jump. Alec rested his chin on Magnus' shoulder, snaking his arms around his waist from behind. Magnus was still struck sometimes by the perfection of this man, but he settled into the embrace as he pulled open a drawer, grabbing a spoon to scoop the ice cream with. "Make sure you put _lots_ of whipped cream on mine. Like, I mean, _a lot_."

"Oh?" Magnus quipped.

"I'm a whipped cream junkie. I used to eat it right out of the can. My mom always hated me for it, and Jace would always get mad 'cause I'd put it back in the fridge empty," he laughed.

"Right out of the can?" Magnus asked, a mischievous grin working across his face.

"Sure."

"Like this?" and Magnus picked up the can of Reddi Whip, pointing it over his shoulder at Alec. Alec, in turn, opened his mouth readily, waiting for Magnus to squirt the creamy dessert onto his tongue. Fat chance.

He pressed the nozzle, moving the can at the last second and depositing a fair amount of white, creamy sweetness across Alec's right cheek and into his hair line. As soon as it hit his face, Alec jumped and let go of Magnus, backing up. His jaw dropped and he just stared at Magnus in disbelief. His boyfriend, meanwhile, was giggling like a maniac, taking in the state of Alec's face. It was quite cute, paired with the expression.

"Are you serious?" Alec asked in shock. But a smirk was already creeping across his face. Magnus still hadn't quit giggling.

"Quite," Magnus managed. And to punctuate the statement, before Alec could catch his movement, he squirted a matching line across his other cheek. Now, he couldn't stop the outright cackling laughter coming out of his chest.

"You. Are going to be sorry," was Alec's only reply before he pounced. Okay, Magnus really should have thought about this before. Alec was a trained athlete, who spent a lot of time in the gym. Although Magnus was taller by a couple of inches, Alec definitely had him beat in the brawn department. He backed up to the counter, feigning surrender and holding out the can. But, just as Alec made to reach for it, he ducked under his arm and ran into the living room.

This was futile, however, since Alec captured him just as he went through the archway, locking those chiseled biceps around Magnus' lean frame, tackling him to the floor. Magnus tried his best not to land on Alec's bad foot, and they wrestled for the can. Alec gained possession pretty quickly, depositing a fair amount of whipped cream over Magnus' forehead and into his gelled hair. They were both laughing hysterically, and eventually both lost their strength and collapsed on their backs. The can was pretty much empty by the end of the ordeal, leaving none for their sundaes. Magnus thought belatedly of the ice cream still sitting on the counter and laughed.

When Magnus lifted himself off the floor to take a look at his boyfriend, he nearly collapsed again. Alec's face was smeared everywhere with white, his eyes peeking through like blue lasers against clouds. He was adorable and beautiful and hilarious looking all at the same time.

"I think I need a shower," Alec managed through his chuckles.

"I think you're right," Magnus answered.

* * *

It was three in the morning by the time Camille returned. Stepping off the elevator, she took in the state of her new abode. It was a disaster still, boxes and suitcases littered everywhere, clothes draped across the chairs and books stacked haphazardly on top of the piano. And in the middle, tangled on her glorious couch, was her best friend and his boyfriend. The hair on both their heads was wild and air-dried, which was out of character for Magnus, but nonetheless adorable. They were both clad in only pajama bottoms. Alec was nestled between Magnus' thighs, his head resting back on his boyfriend's shoulder, tilted so that the tip of his nose grazed Magnus' earlobe. In turn, Magnus' arms were wrapped tightly around Alec's chest, as if in sleep he was afraid Alec would disintegrate into some unknown dream. But both had small smiles of absolute bliss on their faces, and she couldn't bear to think of waking them. Chairman Meow had taken up residence draped over Alec's left thigh, nestled between it and the back of the couch. His eyes fluttered every now and then, and he purred softly. The boys looked so blissful. She stood there in the living room for some timeâ€”she wasn't sure how longâ€”just staring at the two.

Camille was a closed off person, never really letting love in, besides Magnus. She kind of gracefully hopped from millionaire to millionaire, like some blonde, tanned gazelle, always looking for the next hottie to come along to lend her his credit card. She'd always liked these menâ€”they weren't _just_ vessels of shoppingâ€”but she'd never really loved anyone in her life, in that way. She'd never felt like she needed to, since she'd had Magnus. She'd really latched on to him, being that they had so much in common, and he was so fun. She'd never saw him as a romantic interest before (she wasn't really sure why, he was attractive as hell and Katinka testified to his prowess in the sack), but he was the dearest one in her life at the moment. And now, he was leaving.

She peeled herself from her spot, grabbing a blanket from a box next to the television. She carefully draped it over the two boys, who looked so young and innocent in sleep. She smiled to herself as she made her way to her bedroom, thinking that someday, she might want that for herself.

The next morning, Alec had made off to spend time with his mother (his father was still overseas shooting a movie). It seemed that now that he knew she was okay with his being gay, he wanted to spend more time with her, just hanging out. Magnus knew he missed her, as all children do, being that he lived so far away. He protested a slight bit when Alec had said he'd be gone most of the day, but relented when Alec reminded him this was his last day to spend with Camille for a while. Magnus' heart clenched at the thought. It hadn't really crossed his mind yet; he had always just been certain she'd always be around. It was hard to think that he wouldn't have anything to do with himself in LA while he wasn't writing and recording. He'd just be sitting at home, lonely, waiting for Alec to get out of practice. And even then, Alec would be tired and not up for going out or anything, so what was Magnus to do?

"You know, you could do the same thing over there as you do here, to keep you occupied," Camille said, reading his thoughts on his face, and drawing from the direction their lunchtime conversation had taken.

"Oh? What would that be?" asked Magnus, shoveling another bite of Asian chicken salad into his mouth.

"Um, well, I am most likely referring to the glittery purple paradise that you have so kindly bestowed upon meâ€¦"

"The club? What about it? I gave it to you because, well, I won't be able to run it while I'm all the way over there."

"Exactly."

"You make no damn sense sometimes, you know that?" Magnus said with a confused look.

"Honestly, it's good you went to college on a _music_ scholarship. You'd never get past the testing for anything logic-related," Camille retorted, rolling her eyes a little higher than necessary.

"Well, if I'm so dense, kindly spell it out in plain English, please," Magnus shot back.

"You are in the same situation as you were three years ago. You're going to be in a new place, you have a ridiculous amount of money lying around, and you need something to occupy your time. What did you do before? You opened Cherry Bomb."

Magnus stared at her for a second before it clicked. "Hmmâ€¦" He thought about it. It was actually kind of a good idea. He really liked running Cherry Bomb, and that was where he'd met Alec. He also loved being at the center of a party, and what better way to live that life than to create his own party, once again? Sure, he'd be busy writing and recording during the day, but what about when he was done, and had to go home at night and lay around because Alec would be exhausted and asleep? Maybe that wouldn't be the case all the time, but still. Also, he just liked the idea of creating a whole new club from the ground up, like he had the first time. It was fun scouting for locations, decorating, and throwing a big opening night. He'd missed it.

Also, he could see the record company being totally okay with this. What better place to promote his music than at a place he owned, where he could do whatever he wanted? It might get even more publicity because of the fact that Cherry Bomb was so successful, and everyone knew the owner.

* * *

**Song for this section: Lightning Crashes by Live (such a gorgeous, quiet song.)**

Later that evening, Magnus and Alec had decided they'd sleep in Alec's room at his parents' house; this was partly to give Camille her apartment back, and partly because Magnus insisted Alec needed to have a man in this bed at least once. Alec had blushed and laughed at that.

They lay on the bed, on top of the covers. Alec's shoulders rested against the oak headboard, with Magnus nestled against his chest, his back warm and steady against Alec. This was Alec's favorite position. He couldn't explain it, but he really felt protective over the people he loved, and that extended to Magnus. He liked being able to envelop Magnus in his arms like a child and hold him close. At this thought, he consciously slid his arms around his boyfriend's shoulders and did just that, he squeezed tightly. But he was taken aback slightly when he felt Magnus push against the hold, wanted to get up. His heart fluttered at the loss.

"Hold on, I'll be right back ," he said with a smile, and Alec relaxed. He went over to his small bag that was lying open on the floor, pulling out something square, about 10 by 12 inches. It looked like a photo album. Magnus carried it over with him, pulling himself back into the position he had been in before, and Alec reveled in the feeling again.

"What's that?" Alec wondered.

"This," Magnus began with great reverence, "is my most prized possession. Camille has never seen this. She's seen a duplicate of one picture that's in here, but she's never seen the original or the others. Only me. And now, you." He took a deep breath, and opened the album.

Alec's breath caught. He'd seen plenty of beautiful women in his time. His own sister was counted among those, and not just because she was his sister; Isabelle was decidedly gorgeous, which is why she'd been able to make money off her own face and body. There were others, the girls that Jace brought home from time to time, that were just as pretty. Alec admitted that even Camille could be counted among the women he admired for their beauty. But this, the woman staring back at him from this photograph, surpassed them all.

She was young, probably 18 or 19, smiling at the camera candidly. She had long, lustrous ebony locks that fell around her face, looking tousled by the wind. Her skin was an even olive color, completely void of blemishes or even makeup. Her eyes shined a stunning green-yellow, and the recognition hit Alec like a ton of bricks.

Magnus' mother was the most stunning woman he'd ever seen. And he looked exactly like her.

He must have made a noise, gasped or sighed, because Magnus looked up at him with a concerned expression. "She's beautiful," Alec sighed. The statement didn't seem to do the picture justice.

"I know," was Magnus' sincere, somber answer. He flipped the page, and there was another image of the same pretty girl, the about the same age, in a slim fitting white satin gown. She held a single rose and was standing next to a very tall man with a serious face. Magnus' father looked intimidating, but not at all the type of man who would take the life of this demure creature. He flipped another page, and she had aged about 10 years. She was still gorgeous as ever, but there were laugh lines at the corners of her mouth. It seemed only to add to her ethereal nature. Another page held a picture of her and an about 12 year old Magnus, standing on a stage of some sort. Short little Magnus held a plaque, covered with music notes and proclaiming him _All-Region Soloist, University of London Summer Intensive._ She looked so proud and he wasn't even looking at the camera. He was looking up at her, his happiness at her approval plain on his face. It was such an intimate moment, Alec was glad when Magnus turned to another page.

He went through the entire album this way, watching as Magnus' mother aged with grace, until they got to the last photo. It was of both of his parents, his mother sitting on her husband's lap, looking for all the world like the happiest couple in the world.

"She sent this to me two weeks before I got the call," Magnus said quietly, and Alec heard his voice break. He watched as Magnus' hand came up, and he traced his index finger along her smile, and over her flushed cheek. Alec let a lone tear escape the corner of his eye before he reached up and placed his hand over Magnus', twining their fingers together over the picture. Magnus then guided their hands to his lips, placing kisses on every one of Alec's knuckles, then held their hands over his heart, pulling himself closer into Alec's chest. With the other hand, he closed the album and gingerly set it on the bed next to them. Alec slid down a bit, laying them almost flat, but his head still hovered above his boyfriend's, and he could smell the orange scented shampoo he'd used earlier. Magnus shifted around, laying his cheek against Alec's steadily rising and falling chest. Alec kissed the top of his love's head as Magnus struggled to get impossibly closer to him.

"She'd be extremely proud, you know," he said quietly.

"I love you," was Magnus' equally quiet answer. He looked up into Alec's eyes.

"I love you, too." A whisper in the dim light from the bedside lamp. He reached over and extinguished the light, returning his strong arm to its place around Magnus' shoulders. His boyfriend craned his neck up, placing a long, slow kiss on Alec's lips before settling against his heart again.


	44. Chapter 44

"A venti sweet Passion Tea, please. And a red velvet cupcake, too." The barista wrote down Magnus' order on the side of a clear plastic cup, and rang up his total. After he'd received his beloved decadent cupcake and the matching red cup of tea, he made his way to an empty table at the Starbucks on Highland. He watched as the multitude of Beemers and Lexus's rolled by, their tops down and tanned California drivers basking in the sun. He licked the cream cheese icing off the cupcake first, like always, before ridding it of its paper wrapper and taking a slow bite. He basked in the richness of it, as it reminded him of home in New York. This was a ritual of his sometimes, when he wasn't in the mood for shopping or just needed to clear his head. He'd have his favorite combo at the Starbucks close to the East Village and watch the passersby. This was different, but still afforded the same release from monotony.

Magnus had been living in LA for almost three weeks now, and he was finally starting to get used to all the sun. Sure, there was plenty of sun in New York, but it was usually blocked by the sweeping towers of concrete everywhere. This sun was almost pure and unadulterated. And _everyone_ seemed to be in love with it, considering the level of tan that was displayed everywhere. Did people really live their lives on the beaches here? Did anyone actually work? It seemed not, and he fit right in with his caramel complexion.

He was taking a break in between writing and recording sessions, trying to make himself slow down and breathe for a second. He'd been going non-stop lately, and had recorded four songs to perfection already. The producers at Capitol didn't know what to make of him, saying he was churning out some of the most moving songs they'd heard in a while, even counting professional songwriters. The four songs he'd recorded so far were just ones he'd already had lying around, including Big White Room and One and Only. The latter one had a sweet place in his heart, and he'd been adamant about it coming out well on the record.

He was happy with his progress so far. The process was moving far faster than either he or Capitol predicted. He had so many random songs to choose from already, so the writing was really just to pad the album, and to add some happier songs to his repertoire, considering most of them were angsty and sad. He'd made the mistake of playing Glitter in the Air for them, and they absolutely _loved_ it, so they were kind of disappointed when he told them he didn't want it on the album. He'd rather keep that for himself and Alec, since the memory was so private and powerful. Letting mass audiences in on that memory seemed wrong to him. In the meantime, he worked with a couple of different producers off and on, and he was in the process of a few upbeat pop tracks. Everything was exciting and daunting at the same time.

He sipped his tea in relative solitude, Starbucks somehow mildly deserted at this time of day. It was odd, considering one could hop between two or three locations in New York trying to find one that had an empty seat. He guessed people really did like being out in the sun, since they didn't clog the coffee shops.

There was mild chatter coming from two tables away, however. A group of girls were seated around one of the larger tables, a laptop in front of each of them, which was odd. If they wanted to talk, why did they bring computers? If they wanted to work, why were they talking? Honestly, he would never understand girls. But their conversation was animated, and a little loud at times, so he couldn't help but overhear every now and then.

"Girl, he's like, sex on legs. Honestly, I'd just put him in a big glass box and watch him for hours and never be bored," said a girl with brown hair, platinum blonde streaks running from her temples. She was wearing a slashed up Led Zeppelin t-shirt, jean shorts, and cowboy boots. And not the kind Magnus owned, either. Hers were like, legit shit-kickers. She sipped a drink that matched his, and spoke with a southern accent.

"Please, he belongs to me, hun." The girl across from her had long blonde hair and a makeup look he was dying to ask her about. It looked professionally done; maybe she was a makeup artist? She didn't even look up, just continued typing on her laptop and sipping what looked like a vanilla latte, with "skinny" written on the side of the cup. Her body certainly warranted it; she was gorgeous and fit.

A snort came from the girl next to her. This one was clutching a double chocolate chip Frappuccino, sipping contentedly. She rolled her eyes at the blonde's statement, but leaned over to look at her neighbor's screen. Her eyes scanned for a minute, seeming to read something. "Ooooh, I like that. I love your descriptions. Wish I could get thereâ€¦" she trailed off, looking back at her own screen.

"Oh, hush Kitty," said the pretty redhead on the other side of the blonde. "You know you're amazing." She was the only one without a drink sitting in front of her. She tucked a stray strand behind an ear, and adjusted her glasses looking down at her screen. She typed for a couple of seconds, read back over her work, and looked up again. "You're all amazing, honestly. I strive to compete," she said mock-dramatically, her hand over her heart.

The other three looked at her with stern looks before rocker-cowgirl said, "Shut up." But she was smiling. "We'll all be buying your originals someday anyway," she said, the others nodding their agreement.

"Well, I'll be honored that they will be shelved next to all of yours," redhead answered.

"Someday," Kitty said dreamily, looking back down at her screen. "Amber, how on earth do you write without caffeine in front of you?" she asked.

The redhead laughed lightly. It was pretty. "I don't know. I don't even know what to order here," she said, shrugging her shoulders.

"Oh, honey. Caffeine is the fuel of a writer's soul. It doesn't matter what you order," said the blonde with the amazing makeup. So they were writers? That made some sense.

"Which is why Allie is in line for the third time since we've been here?" asked Kitty with a giggle. "Brooke, seriously, control your woman!"

Cowgirl laughed. "Can't be tamed," she answered, looking over to the line with a contented smile. "Brittany's just as bad!" she said by way of defense.

"Hey, I have to deal with a mini-me at home. I need it to keep me awake and running after her," the blonde replied. They all chuckled and went back to typing.

That was when a girl with dark teal-colored hair and makeup that rivaled Brittany's came skipping over animatedly. She was carrying a steaming cup of tea, and proceeded to place herself neatly on Brooke's lap. This must be Allie.

"Did someone mention caffeine?" she asked, kissing (her girlfriend?) Brooke's forehead.

"Synonymous with 'Allie'," said Brooke.

"Okay, can we return to our previous topic of conversation? Because my brain is still stuck on those luscious abs," said Amber dreamily.

"TouchÃ©," said Brittany. "We were discussing how those luscious abs belong to me and not Brooke."

"Right, sure," A pretty brunette, who'd been typing away quietly till now, said haughtily. "Well, can I borrow him sometime? Or at least come over and stare in those baby blues for hours? Oh how I would _love_ to touch that sweaty body just once," she said, shivering. She picked up her mocha Frappuccino and sipped slowly, savoring the flavor or thinking of said sweaty body, he couldn't tell.

"Well, sure you can Emily, but it's not like he'd particularly enjoy it. At least, not from _you_," said Kitty. "He likes a set of _stronger_ hands," she said, giggling.

"And somehow, that makes it even _hotter_," said Allie. Every girl at the table nodded her agreement and sighed. What on earth were they talking about? A guy, obviously, but who? And was he to understand that this guy was made hotter by wanting a pair of manly hands instead of a girl's? What strange ladies these were.

"I just can't get over the fact that our OTP is now life-canon. It's like all is exactly right with the world, and we predicted it," sighed Amber. "I mean, we've been shoving them together for years in our stories, and all of a sudden it turns out _real_? Life is complete now." Again, they all sighed and smiled to themselves. What is an OTP? Magnus wondered.

"Personally, I always knew Alexander Lightwood was just in the closet," said Emily. "I called that shit _years_ ago." Magnus froze. They were talking about _Alec_?

In his shock, he replayed the conversation in his head. They thought Alec was sexy that was plain, and they were correct. But usually, girls who found celebrities sexy fantasized about being with them. This group of girls, it seemed, was overjoyed that Alec Lightwood had turned out _gay_. What on earth was _with_ them? It was so odd. Also, Amber made a reference to shoving Alec together with someone, and now it was real. Were they talking about _him_? They wrote stories about Magnus and Alec? Well, that was a little creepyâ€¦but flattering. Hmm. He listened in again, since they were still talking heatedly.

"You guys, we were _there_ at LAX. It was soâ€¦" and Allie didn't even finish the sentence, choosing to swoon instead.

Brooke nodded. "Seriously, I just sat there in awe. I'm totally inspired to write the entire Malec 'getting together' story now," she said lightly.

Oh lord, they had a combined nickname already? Magnus made the mistake of snorting at that thought. From her perch on Brooke's lap, Allie's eyes cut to his corner. Her face went white as a glistening pearl.

"Uhâ€¦Umâ€¦guys?" she said, not able to break eye contact with him. The rest of the table looked up from their gushing and typing, following her gaze. Their faces all automatically changed to match Allie's, becoming wide eyed and pale. Then, in complete unison, they all slammed their laptops shut, their faces rapidly reddening. He couldn't help but laugh at the scene; it was so comical. They were all stunned to silence.

He used this opportunity to casually stand, discarding his empty cup and paper wrapper. He made his way to the door, passing their table on the way. "You think his abs _look_ luscious? They _feel_ even better," he said, dropping a wink. He passed out of the door, not even knowing the wake of sheer fangirling he left behind him.

He made his way over to Capitol, heading in for another 6 hours of straight recording. He loved the whole process, but it was tiring. At least it wasn't monotonous.

Over the course of the day, he'd done at least 15 takes each of three or four songs, and the producer had found a keeper take for each of them. Once again, he was constantly being told this was going so much faster than expected. Most albums took many months to record and tweak to perfection, but his was apparently going to be finished recording in a little over a month and a half. He'd be able to start promotion after New Year's, with the album set to release in early February. It was a whirlwind, but he couldn't ask for a better life at the moment. During all of it, he kept thinking how proud his mother would be. Everything he did in the studio, he did for her. She was always at the forefront of his mind.

* * *

**Song for this section: Because of You by Ne-Yo (nice, laid back background music)**

He'd promised Alec dinner that night, so he let himself into his boyfriend's apartment with his own key. Magnus' apartment was all furnished and decorated, but he still preferred to hang out at Alec's place. For one, he didn't have to be in angst over the fact that his beloved piano wasn't there. He always sat in the living room, writing, and wished he could play it instead of the brand new electric keyboard nestled against the wall in his bedroom. It just wasn't right.

The other reason he liked hanging out at Alec's was because Alec was always sweaty when he came in from practice, and he could just come in and start throwing off his sweaty clothes, getting changed immediately rather than having to be coaxed to wear something of Magnus'. He was still trying to get Alec to open up, wardrobe-wise, but it was slow going. Plus, he knew Alec was tired at the end of his days. He didn't do regular practice with the team yet; his foot wasn't quite in the best shape yet. But he did do physical therapy and practiced kicking goals on the sidelines. He also jogged around the field a lot, working out his unused muscles. He was getting back into shape, and he was usually exhausted by the time he came through the door.

The chicken parmesan was just about done when Alec got home. As per usual, he threw his big white LA Galaxy duffel down next to the door, stripping off his practice jersey as he made his way to his bedroom. "Smells good!" he yelled on his way through the living room. Magnus smiled.

"Thanks! It's almost done!" he yelled back. "Shower quick!"

"Yeah!" came the reply. He knew Alec would be in and out of the shower in under five minutes. The man clearly didn't understand the merits of staying under the spray until he wrinkled like a raisin. Alec was a practical being, and didn't make much time for the pointless pleasures in life. Magnus was slowly opening him up, however. They'd taken a very long bubble bath two nights ago that had been extremely satisfying. Of course, the sex afterwards wasn't bad either.

Magnus smiled at how domesticated they'd become in such a short time. It was like they had always been waiting for the opportunity to slip into a routine that both had been lacking their entire lives. He was steadily learning Alec's habitsâ€”some of which annoyed him, like his penchant for throwing his t-shirts over the backs of chairs in the living roomâ€”and Alec was getting used to him always being around, either in his apartment or just across town. They had retained some of their bachelor ways, but they spent enough time together to have established a routine of togetherness without it overpowering either of them. They each had their own careers, but they made it a point to set aside time for each other.

Magnus sighed contentedly as a pair of warm, strong biceps circled his waist, and moist lips grazed the side of his neck. He leaned back into the embrace, stirring the marinara sauce a few more times before picking up a pair of oven mitts and removing it from the burner. He felt drops from Alec's damp hair fall onto his ear and cheek, and he couldn't help a shiver. He laughed it off, turning around in Alec's arms and placing a soft kiss on his waiting lips.

They ate dinner in relative silence, just enjoying soaking up each other. When they were about halfway through their meal, Magnus spoke up.

"I found a good location for the new club yesterday," he said.

"Oh? Where at?" Alec asked around a mouth full of fettuccine.

"It's over on Sunset. It's a pretty big place, and has a great setup. Good bones. I'm thinking I'll head over tomorrow after I get out of the studio, and talk to the guy." He looked up at Alec's small chuckle. "What?"

"You just sound so excited," he replied.

"Well, I am. I can't believe I didn't think of this before. Although, it would probably have come to me sooner or later. Camille just got there first," Magnus said shrugging, and forking his last bite of chicken.

"I like that you've found something to do for yourself. It can't be _all_ recording; you'd go insane. And, I think it'sâ€¦cute," he added with a faint cherry stain on his cheeks.

"Oh, _I'm_ cute, am I?" Magnus teased. He reached over, across the corner of the table, and used his thumb to wipe a bit of marinara that lingered at the corner of Alec's mouth. He began to pull his hand back, but Alec caught his wrist. He pulled Magnus' thumb into his mouth, and sucked hard getting the sauce off and then some. Magnus couldn't help the small groan as Alec ran his tongue over the tip of his thumb, mimicking movements he did when they were engaged in a very different activity. Magnus sometimes mentally chastised himself at these moments, because he was instantly hard. What was he, 15? Who'd have thought such a small gesture would have him horny and willing in a matter of seconds?

But then, Alec released his wrist and sat back, grinning. "Sorry," he said after a couple of seconds of Magnus' incredulous look.

"No, I like it," Magnus said when he regained his composure.

"No, that's not it. Sorry for getting you worked up. I've got an early one tomorrow and so do you. You know we can't be doing this every single night. We've had 5 hours of sleep between us in the past three days," he said, chuckling. It was true, they'd made a bit of a habit of cuddling and _other things_, spanning to all hours of the night. "I want to get back on the field as quick as possible, so I really need to take my sleep schedule seriously," he amended solemnly. Magnus understood perfectly. If he was being perfectly honest, he wasn't on his _best_ game lately either. Sleep was good. That's what he kept telling himself, trying to make the large bulge in his pants subside. It had almost disappeared by the time dishes were in the dishwasher and Alec was walking him to the door, but it was back in full force as he received his goodnight kiss, with a side of dry humping against the front door.

When Alec pulled back, the shit-eating grin on his face told Magnus what he'd already been thinking: he'd done that entirely on purpose. Magnus playfully shoved Alec away, offering a sulky but still heartfelt 'I love you' before retreating out the door.

* * *

**Song for this section: Famous by Puddle of Mudd (What Alec is listening to in his car, and also it's upbeat and stuff so it suits.)**

Alec turned up the radio and punched the gas when he got up on the highway, choosing to whip in and out of traffic on his way to Carson. He always took every opportunity to appreciate the power of this beautiful machine. Sure, he had Magnus taking up most of the space in his heart at the moment, but this car was his first confidant. He'd always love it and he loved pushing it to its limits. The only problem with that was that he arrived before most everyone to the LA Galaxy practice complex. As he pulled into a parking spot and gently killed the engine, he rubbed the dashboard affectionately. "Back in 6 hours," he said.

He entered the locker room to get changed to his practice jersey and shorts. He usually saw the trainer for the first two hours of his day for physical therapyâ€”which was boring as hell, by the wayâ€”and then went out to the field to do laps and agility exercises. Re-training his body to do what it did best was taxing, and it usually left him beyond exhausted, but he was getting back into shape slowly. The first couple of weeks he was back at practice, three laps around the field had him gasping for air. It was rather embarrassing. He'd never gone so long in his life without playing, even in off season. He'd been literally bed- and couch-ridden for way too long. But it was slowly coming back. He could feel the tight contraction of his quads when he practiced goals, and it felt good. Physical activity was just in his bones, and he felt _right_ when he was sweating and working his muscles to the brink.

Of course, there were other ways he could be sweating and working his musclesâ€¦

_Stop it, Alec. Head on the task at hand._

He'd skipped out last night on what probably would have been some potentially mind blowing sex (because, let's face it, when was sex with Magnus not mind blowing?), but he knew it was for discipline's sake. Once he was back out on the field and playing in games, he could reward himself with nightly blowjobs and screaming and sweating and moaning and grabbing andâ€¦

_Stop._

He reprimanded himself, choosing to think of what was on his plate for the day. When he remembered that today was "easy" day for physical therapy (in which he would be treated to a massage of his injured foot for about half an hour), he felt renewed and ready for the day. As he was drawing on his jersey, he heard footsteps entering the locker room. Someone else was ungodly early, too, it seemed.

A few seconds later, Landon strolled around the corner, carrying his duffel over his shoulder and looking still half asleep. Alec froze when he saw him. It had been a while since Alec had found himself alone with any of his teammates for any length of time. They hadn't really addressed the entireâ€¦_situation_ yet, and he tried to avoid being in scenarios where he would have to converse about it with any of them. But now he was stuck.

"Oh hey, Buzz!" said Landon a little too cheerfully. He didn't have an awkward look on his face, but Alec could tell in the way that he moved around nervously that he was thinking the same thing Alec was.

"Hey, Landon. What you doing here so early?" he asked, shoving his clothes in his locker.

"Oh, you know. So eager to get to the daily grind," he laughed. "Couldn't sleep, actually. Figured I'd get a few laps in before the rest of the guys got here. You?"

"I'm always here this early. Don't really know why, I just like the peace before the storm I guess," Alec replied.

"Are you referring to any impending storm in particular?" Landon asked after a short beat of silence. Alec looked up at him, but didn't answer. He really didn't want to bring this up now; they'd gone a good while avoiding it and getting shit done, and he was content to leave it that way. Out of sight, out of mind, and all that.

He turned around after shoving his bag into his locker, and there was Landon, standing in only his underwear. Alec blushed and turned around, without a thought as to how silly that was. He was a guy, in a guys' locker room. That's what one _did_ here. Landon caught his reaction and chuckled to himself, and Alec couldn't help the thought that he'd done it on purpose.

"You expect me to act weird around you now, don't you?" he asked as he pulled on his shorts. Again, Alec didn't answer. He figured it was a rhetorical question. "Well, if that's what you think then I underestimated you." Alec turned his head over his shoulder, sneaking a look at his companion again. He was now fully clothed, pulling on his shin guards. At Alec's raised eyebrow, he went on. "I'd have thought you knew me by now. Not to mention the rest of us. Do we seem that shallow to you?"

"Honestly, I've always perceived the entire _world_ as that shallow. Even my own mother," Alec replied, referring to why he'd kept himself a secret until this fiasco.

"Well, I don't know about shallow, but your mother is one intimidating woman. I'd be scared to break anything to her. How did she take it?"

"Rather well, actually. I'm still kind of getting over the fact that she _didn't_ freak out. She was conceivably angry that she'd had to find out from television, but that was it. It was reallyâ€¦odd," he said, remembering his talk with his mother in New York.

"That should serve to show you. You shouldn't always judge people by your own internal standards. Not everyone is out to get you, Alexander," said Landon in a very Yoda-like voice. Alec couldn't help but smile.

"So, you aren't angry with me either?"

"Oh, I'm a tad angry that you didn't trust me or any of the rest of us. We're supposed to be a _team_, man. No matter what. That means we all accept the fact that Mark can't hold a wife. We accept the fact that my sister can't go a year without plastic surgery of some sort. We accept the fact that David is a complete asshole sometimes. And, we accept the fact that you're gay," he said.

Alec flinched at the word like it was a slap, even though it was said gently. Landon walked over and clapped him on the shoulder. "Man, you gotta loosen up, Buzz. We're all tired of waiting for that to happen," he said lightly. He started to walk out of the locker room, but turned at the last second and spoke quietly. "This guy, you like him a lot?" he asked.

Alec could never help the swell in his heart when he thought of Magnus. He tried to fight back the giddy smile that threatened to burst forth, but Landon caught it nonetheless. He didn't need to answer the question.

"Well, make sure he treats you right. Can't have you getting all depressed and losing focus. We have enough on our plate with Mark's PMS," he said, strolling out to start warming up. Alec slammed his locker shut and let out a huge breath. That wasn't so bad, was it?

* * *

**Song for this section: Take Me Out by Franz Ferdinand (Upbeat and awesome. Playing very low in the background, just kind of randomly on the radio.)**

Magnus absently glanced around the large room. There was dust and power tools everywhere, but he could definitely see his new masterpiece taking shape. However, it needed a theme, not to mention a name. He'd been obsessed with purple at the time he was decorating Cherry Bomb (he'd just purchased his beloved purple Porsche), but he wanted this one to be drastically different. He was starting a new chapter of his life, he was on the other end of the country, and the people here were very different from Manhattan socialites. It needed to fit their style if he was going to compete with places like the White Bar and the Viper Room. He didn't want to go the "sunny California" route though; he wanted something dark, dirty, and dangerous looking, but with a little cheeky flair.

As he sat on top of the unfinished bar, he was bombarded with a sharp sliver of light from across the room. He looked to the door to see three girls, all looking in their early 20s, striding in. So, his "Help Wanted" sign had worked. Or so he'd hoped.

"Um, hello? We saw the 'help' sign out front. We're wondering if you're still hiring? Hello?" said the cherry red-head on the right, looking around. He was kind of hidden in the dark across the room; they thought there wasn't anyone here. He hopped down from the bar and made his way over, startling them a bit.

On closer glance, his eyes widened in recognition. After all, teal hair was hard to forget.

"Waitâ€¦" He thought for a moment. "Allie, right?" he asked the youngest looking one. When he saw her eyes go wide he knew he'd hit his mark. He also recognized the girl standing next to her, even though she'd dyed her brown hair jet black in the last couple of weeks. She still sported what he perceived to be her trademark classic rock t-shirt (this time it was AC/DC) and cowboy boots. The both of them stayed completely silent, presumably shocked.

The one that had spoken first, the one with the cherry-red hair, he didn't recognize. She looked unfazed by his appearance, but nonetheless slightly intrigued. "You're Magnus Bane, right?" she asked tentatively.

"I am. You girls here for a job? I thought those two were writers," he said, gesturing to the two dumbfounded girls.

"Bartender," blurted the cowgirlâ€¦Brooke, he thought he remembered. She recovered after a second. "I'm a bartender. I only write in my spare time. And we're having a little trouble meeting rent," she said, pointing to herself and Allie, "so yes. I am in need of employment. So is she," she jerked her thumb at the red head.

"I'm just tired of the monotony of university life. Honestly, my companions in the department wouldn't know a good time if it bit them on the ass. I mean, don't get me wrong, I love a good discussion on the intricacies ofâ€”"

"Cornie, hush. Sorry, she gets carried away with her physics major mind sometimes. But she can do a little bartending and wait tables," said Brooke.

"What about you?" Magnus asked Allie. She just smiled.

"Employed already," she chirped. "I'm just tagging along."

"Oh? And where, may I ask, do you work?"

"The Eleventh Room," she said with a seductive smile.

"Well," he said, turning to Brooke, "You've started LA life out right, dating a stripper." Brooke just laughed.

"I prefer semi-clothed dancer, thank you," Allie quipped, but she smiled.

"So, what do we do for an interview?" asked Cornie.

"Actuallyâ€¦" he thought for a moment, weighing the pros and cons of girls who adored his boyfriend working in an establishment where his boyfriend would undoubtedly make many appearances. On one hand, they might not be capable of working when that happened. On the other hand, they'd spread the word pretty quickly. He'd gain notoriety fast in a new town. He made a split decision. "You're all hired."

"Wait, what?" Allie said.

"Tell them I'll pay you double to keepâ€¦most of your clothes on," he said with a smile.

"Seriously? Just like that? What aboutâ€”" Brooke cut Cornie off again.

"Shut up!" she whisper-yelled. "You have a job. With Magnus Bane! Don't question it!" She turned back to Magnus, who held out his hand. He shook with all three of them and sent them on their overly merry way. He did find himself thinking that they made a rather appealing trio to the eye. Black, red, and green. And he'd gotten rather lucky to snatch up such cute employees at a moment's notice. _Hmmmm_.


	45. Chapter 45

It was an unusually warm day given that it was December 15th, but he guessed that was California. The skies here had a love affair with summer, and seemed unwilling to give it up; even in the dead of winter. It made for a nice, relaxing atmosphere for this extremely relaxing day. Relaxing for the two involved, anyway. Magnus thought Alec might find it either incredibly boring or needlessly tiring. But Magnus' companion for the day thankfully appreciated it as much as he did, and he found they had a lot of the same tastes.

He and Isabelle had spent the entire day at the Grove and Fashion Island. They'd first made the excuse that they were searching for Christmas gifts, but they'd ultimately ended up shopping for clothes for themselves. Neither could help it when they saw a good pair of ungodly tight pants. They now made the excuse that they were shopping for the perfect outfit for their outing later that week. Since the Lightwoods' parents were spending some much needed alone time in the South of France for the holidays, their children (well, mainly Isabelle) had opted to arrange a little get together of their own. She'd convinced Simon to fly out to LA using kisses, and promises of hungry record labels. After all, if he played a couple of random gigs he might get discovered quicker here than in the mess of alternate rockers in NYC. She'd shamelessly used her new best friend as proof (while leaving out the part about Magnus _actually_ being discovered in New York).

She'd gotten a hold of Jace, who'd finished wrapping up in Malibu a while ago, and invited him and Clary. They wouldn't call it official, but they'd been photographed together at enough premieres and parties to make it hard for others not to. He told Isabelle that Clary still wanted to remain semi-anonymous being that she had extreme social anxiety and kind of liked to go unnoticed. Isabelle rolled her eyes at this. If she was dating Jace, she'd better switch up her priorities. He had a love affair with cameras almost as strong as his love affair with his own face. It seemed, however, that this red headed artist girl was slowly wearing down the narcissistic exterior. That was enough make Isabelle give her a fighting chance.

And then there was her other brother. Isabelle wasn't one of those girls who believed in love at first sight, everlasting romance, and all that shit. She knew this was real life, not an Austen novel. However, something always sparked in Alec's eyes whenever Magnus was mentioned, and Magnus had trouble suppressing a smile when Alec's name was dropped into the conversation. She doubted either of them even noticed it. It was ridiculous, but Isabelle found herself envious of what her brother had. Not in a hostile way, but in a way that left her hoping she and Simon would grow into that kind of dynamic. It was uncanny, and hard not to notice about them. If she believed in soul mates, she'd say Magnus and her brother were a prime example.

The three couples had resolved to have their own little holiday get together, and she was rather excited. It so happened that Capitol was throwing a Christmas party at the Chateau Marmont, and Magnus was invited along with whomever he wanted to bring. So, the six of them would make an appearance. It sometimes seemed rather odd to her, that none of them had actually acknowledged their relationships in the media other than being photographed together. She and Simon hung out around each other enough that people just assumed, and Alec and Magnus had had the whole television scandal. However, none of them ever explicitly stated their status to the media. Magnus did a few interviews in promotion for his album, but whenever they asked about his love life he got vague, and always left them wanting more. While they had been outed on television, they didn't go around flaunting. They weren't photographed together all that much, and they didn't walk the streets of LA holding hands. This was mostly due to their busy work schedules, but also because she suspected Alec was still apprehensive about being out of the closet in public. He'd gone his entire life hiding it, and she could imagine it was hard letting go of one's most closely guarded secret. But Magnus and Alec knew how they felt about each other, and that was enough.

"You nervous?" she asked as they strolled out of Juicy Couture.

"A little. They said they didn't expect me to, like, perform or anything. But they did warn me I would be 'flaunted'," he said, using quotation fingers and rolling his eyes slightly. She knew what that meant. She'd been paraded in front of designers and photographers by her agency more than enough times to know that no party was completely spent at leisure. There was _always_ business. She could understand why the label would want to flaunt Magnus to different members of the media public, since his album was due out in a little over a month and a half.

"Well, just remember to have a good time. I can't have you being all tense. You're no fun that way, to me _or_ my brother," she smirked. She loved that she could drop the smallest innuendo and Magnus would pick it up and run with it. Alec, on the other hand, would blush and clam up in silence. She had to admit, they were perfect opposites. It seemed to work entirely in their favor.

"On the contrary. He rather likes it when certain parts of my body go rigid," Magnus quipped with a side-eye and a mischievous smirk. She tried not to, but she burst out laughing. He joined, and they looped their arms together as they strolled back to Magnus' brand new white Bentley convertible. He'd left his precious purple Porsche behind, opting for a sleeker, more Cali-like ride. And if one was going to be "Cali", one _must_ have a convertible. It had been his gift to himself for finishing up recording for the album last week. He was well on his way with promotion and things like that, with the album due out in early February. Isabelle rather liked the car, and was considering getting a convertible for herself after their day out around town.

They threw their multitude of bags in the back seat, each sliding into the smooth embrace of khaki colored, supple leather. Magnus' emerald green polished fingers gripped the shiny wood-grain steering wheel gingerly, and shifted the car into gear with a satisfying click.

"You know, I never understood why Alec could love a machine so much, but I do believe I'm being slowly converted," Magnus said as they sped out and onto the highway, headed back to his apartment. Their hair whipped out behind them, making tangles but neither of them caring. Isabelle could get used to Magnus Bane hanging around for a long time, she admitted. He was one of the more "real" friends she'd made since becoming a subject of media and public affection. It was hard to find that, and she could appreciate his genuineness. It also didn't hurt that he could name what year, season, and collection a pair of pumps were from, from a mile away.

When they arrived at Magnus' apartment in West Hollywood Heights, she stepped out of the elevator and into his rather large living room. It was decorated in muted fuchsias and deep purples, with accents of white everywhere. The comfy couch in the middle of the room was white with faint lavender embroidery; the pillows that adorned it were fringed with hot pink. It had the potential to look rather like a teenage girl's bedroom, but he'd made the color scheme sophisticated. She really did appreciate his fine-tuned sense of style.

As they made their way to his bedroom to drop off their bags, she admired yet another specimen of fine decorating. This room, however, was all bright, sunlit yellows and blues. The bed was the stand out feature, with its vivid canary yellow comforter and various throw pillows in different shades of blue. There were less "frilly" touches in here, but it was nonetheless bright and fashionable. Isabelle wondered if Magnus toned down the "frilly" because Alec spent considerable time in here. But then she stopped herself, thinking that surely Magnus didn't do _everything_ with Alec in mindâ€¦

Magnus opened his closet to put his bags away, and Isabelle almost choked on her own breath. The closet wasn't _very_ large, compared to hers at home, but for an apartment this size it was massive. And it was filled to the brim with glittering, leathery, couture goodness. Along one side, there was an enormous amount of high fashion tops, vests, and button downs. She swore she saw the entire spring collection of Alexander McQueen in there. There were pants hung up on the other side, spanning the full length of the wall, with the overflow flung over a small shoe rack. These covered the dozens of pairs of fine footwear that lined its shelves. There were boots and slip-ons in all colors and finishes, some shiny patent, some glittering snakeskin. It was absolutely breathtaking. She'd never seen a wardrobe to rival her own, save for that of other models (simply because most of the clothes had been given to them). She was fascinated with the sight.

He caught her staring and laughed. "I would have thought _you_ of all people wouldn't be fazed by this," he said, gesturing to the homage to fashion week that was his closet. "Honestly, I don't even wear half the stuff, but I can't give it up. One cannot waste good fashion," he intoned with a serious air. She had to admit she agreed.

"I just wish we could make your man see that," she said. He nodded with a contented smile on his face. Whether it was from the mention of her brother, or the mention of her brother well-dressed, she didn't know. Probably a little of both.

"I have a favor to ask you. I want your opinion on Alec's gift. It was finished the other day, and I'm just finding myself really, really nervous that he won't like it or something." Magnus really did sound nervous, so she couldn't help but be a little nervous herself. What had he gotten her brother that he should be nervous about?

He reached into a drawer in the built-in dresser in the closet, pulling out a small, elongated robin's egg blue box. Any girl would know that box anywhere. She always sighed a little at the thought of what could be contained in that particular box when she received one herself. Though now, she could kind of understand why Magnus was nervous. She didn't think Alec would understand the merits of a gift from Tiffany's.

He handed her the delicate box and motioned for her to peek inside. She slowly slid the cover off, and gazed at the gorgeous piece of jewelry lying in the bed of luxurious cotton cloth. For the second time that day, Magnus' fortitude for the finer things made her mouth gape open.

"It was custom-made. I wanted something extremely special, but also something that he would least likely object to. Do youâ€¦do you think he'll like it?" he asked apprehensively.

"Oh, Magnus," she whispered. She looked the piece over again, noting its fine details, and the inscription etched into the famous Tiffany silver. She'd never heard the words before, but she figured they had meaning to Magnus and Alec. "It really does fit him. You wouldn't think so, but I believe it's exactly perfect for him." She carefully replaced the cover on the box and handed it back to Magnus, who returned it to its safe hiding place. When he turned back around, she couldn't help but envelop him in her arms, squeezing him tight.

"Not that I object," he said into her ear, "but what is this for?"

"For being exactly what my brother has needed forever," she replied, holding back a stray tear that threatened to fall.

* * *

**Song for this section: Selfish Love by Miyavi (MAGNUSCEPTION HAHAHA. Magnus is humming along with this as he gets ready)**

The night of the party had arrived, and Magnus' room looked like the Katrina aftermath. There had been a tsunami of fashion, with couture littering every single available surface. He sat at his small vanity in the extra bedroom, applying electric blue eyeliner with an expert hand. He was nervous, yes, but not so much that his hands betrayed him. They didn't shake as he stroked a semi-thick liquid blue line above his lashes. He topped it with a little bit of silver glitter liner, and sat back to admire his work. His stereo was going in the background, and he hummed the Japanese along with it. He rather liked Miyavi, and really wished he could become such a diva with a guitar. But alas, he would stick to piano, with the occasional guitar interlude.

With his appearance close to complete, he strolled to the full length mirror over his closet door and admired the whole package. He was in a very tailored Armani blazer that was a dark charcoal color. It had a notched lapel that made his neck look elongated and elegant. It framed the loose blue tie he wore perfectly. His dress shirt underneath was a slightly lighter shade of grey than the jacket, and it set off his tanned skin nicely. His legs were clad in fitted dark jeans. They weren't quite "skinny" jeans, as he didn't look as if he was poured into them (like his usual pants), but they did show off his ass rather well.

"You're trying to kill me. You know that, right?" said a voice from the doorway that made the blood in his veins heat up. Magnus turned to look at his visitor, and gasped. It never failed to surprise him how completely breathtaking Alec looked, even when he was only in soccer shorts and socks. But thisâ€¦this was torturously delicious.

Alec was wearing a black suede motorcycle jacket over a stark white dress shirt that was open at the first two buttons. He had on a skinny black tie that hung loose around his neck. His jeans were black and fitted, hugging his muscular thighs in a way that should be illegal. He had on thick boots that rose above his ankles, and his jeans were stuffed haphazardly into them. The particulars of the outfit were quite plain, leading Magnus to believe Isabelle had no part in dressing him before he showed up. However, standing there leaning casually against the doorframe, his black hair gelled into that just-fucked mess, he looked like a pale, blue-eyed and mischievous James Dean. A cigarette hanging precariously from the corner of his mouth would have been fitting, had Magnus not hated the idea of smoking. As it was, he was rendered quite speechless at the sight, while Alec just stared at him with approval in his own eyes.

Magnus' gorgeous boyfriend strolled over, slowly sliding his arms around Magnus' waist. It always felt like coming home, being here in these arms. He reached up and twined his hands in Alec's sex hair at the base of his neck, caressing softly. This drew Alec in, and their lips brushed together, deepening for a moment before Magnus pulled away with a contented smile. Alec looked a little hurt, but Magnus reassured him.

"Hold on. I wantâ€¦I want to give you your present now. Is that okay?" he asked. "It would just be perfect for tonight, withâ€¦that," he said, gesturing to Alec's completely fuckable attire.

"But yours won't be here until Monday," Alec protested. "I feel bad taking mine early."

"Oh hush. Just say yes. You know I'll pull it out of you sooner or later," Magnus countered, and Alec just smirked. He drew in close to Magnus again, stopped to let his breath waft over the tender spot below Magnus' jaw.

"Don't push it, baby," came a low, stern voice. "You know what could happen if you talk back to me," Magnus' breath hitched as Alec tightened his grip on his waist for just a second before letting go with another smirk of victory. Magnus had to admit, he had him in a hypothetical puddle on the floor. Alec was still incredibly new to this fetish of Magnus', and he certainly didn't actively seek out ways to exploit it, but every so often he would do things like that. And Magnus would be reduced to a fantasizing, daydreaming mess for a second. He resolved a while ago that one day, he would get Alec to really give in. But for now, he wanted this moment to give Alec a gift he'd put his heart into.

He reached into the closet drawer and pulled out the Tiffany blue box, tied with the customary black ribbon, and handed it to Alec. The athlete took the delicate box with care, looking at Magnus incredulously.

"Magnus, this is from Tiffany's. I've seen Isabelle with these all the time."

"Of course it is. Only the best for my man," Magnus returned.

"They make stuff for guys there?" Alec inquired. Magnus had to chuckle a little.

"Yes, but this isn't just anything. Just open it, and see."

Alec carefully slid the lid off the box, placing it on the bed beside them. When his eyes caught the shining silver within, he looked up at Magnus in wonder. Magnus' green-gold eyes just shimmered with anticipation at a further reaction; so Alec looked down to examine the gift again.

On a silver chain hung two gleaming silver dog tags. He gingerly gripped the chain between his thumb and forefinger, afraid to touch the dangling tags and leave prints on them. He gazed at the piece of jewelry in his hand, thinking that he really wasn't a jewelry kind of guy. Yet, somehow, he was in love with this. It seemed to suit him better than he would have imagined.

"Do you like it?" Magnus asked.

"Magnus, this is ridiculous," he said in awe. "Itsâ€¦gorgeous. What on earth made you think of _me_ when you saw this?"

"Well, it didn't exactly happen that way," Magnus said as he took the chain and pendants from Alec's fingers and gently brought it over his head. The chain was rather long, making the tags settle right over his heart. "I had this made for you. I wanted to get you something extra amazing, since you're extra amazing to me." He blushed, which was out of character but nonetheless breathtaking to behold. "Look," he instructed, fingering the pendants. Alec looked at them more closely than before, and noticed they had been engraved. One said _And time can do so much_, which he recognized as lyrics from Unchained Melody. His mother loved that song and he used to hear its soft notes emanating from her room at night when he was young. He remembered thinking that song was the most beautiful thing he'd ever heard. It was simple, but spoke volumes. The other tag had the line _My love follows you where you go._ That was from the song Magnus sang him in his room, on his father's guitar. That memory was one of the most precious he had of their relationship so far, and he was touched that Magnus thought of it that way as well. He also noticed that on the first pendant, there was a small sapphire set into the silver. On the other, there was an equally beautiful peridot stone, which was almost the exact color of Magnus' eyes.

"See? No matter where we are, we'll always be together. And even when we don't see eye to eye," he fingered the pendants again, "we _will_."

"Magnus Bane, I love you," Alec said, pulling his boyfriend into a comfortable embrace and placing his lips to his temple. They stayed wrapped in each other's arms for a long moment, each of them savoring the feel of being held against a heart that beat only for him.

* * *

**Song for this section: Lost in this World by Anouk (Sensual and gorgeous. Playing when they're alone in the other room.)**

Thank god for red-carpet-less affairs. Alec wasn't sure he could deal with that just yet, having Magnus be his official _date_ to something, being photographed on purpose and everything. He liked having Magnus there with him, but just wasn't to the point where he could confidently hold his hand in public and not run for the hills. He knew this annoyed and hurt Magnus to some extent, but he never came out and said it. Alec thought his behavior towards him might be a little worse, though. Magnus was a little closed off the whole night. It shouldn't really have bothered Alec, but he _knew_ Magnus. He was rather like a girl (or at least, like Isabelle) in that he discreetly pouted when something wasn't going his way. He wasn't out and out bitchy, but Alec, knowing Magnus inside and out, could tell the difference in faked smiles and real ones.

When the girls were off in the restroom and Magnus had been whisked away by the record company to shake hands and smile at random people, Jace cornered him.

"Man, you really need to pull the baseball bat out of your ass," he said nonchalantly as he handed Alec a tall, amber drink. Alec took it, eyeing the substance before taking a tentative sip. It was a Long Island Iced Tea, and he hadn't had anything to eat since lunch. But, he reasoned, he needed a little boost for his nerves. "Unless, you know, you like that sort of thing."

Alec almost didn't hear it, as Jace said it very, very softly. But when it dawned on him, he whipped his head around with a glare that could melt Antarctica.

Jace jumped back from him a little, throwing up his hand that didn't have a drink in it. "Sorry, sorry! Kidding! Just trying to lighten the mood," he teased. "Really, you two look like you've been on pins and needles the entire night. What's going on?"

"Is it that obvious?" Alec sighed.

"Well, considering you've avoided looking at each other when other people are aroundâ€¦which is all the timeâ€¦ What's the matter? Did you guys fight?"

Alec was trying to get past the fact that his brother was asking about his relationship with his boyfriend. It was so bizarre. They'd gotten past Jace's initial anger for Alec keeping this from him, and they'd made amends quite a while ago. However, it was still weird for Alec to talk about this with the number one person he'd tried to keep it from. But he tried to let it go and talk freely with his younger brother.

"Well, not exactly a fight. More like aâ€¦misunderstanding, I guess."

"Go onâ€¦" Jace prodded. Alec took a deep breath, trying to push past the awkwardness.

"I justâ€¦I just don't think I'm ready to beâ€¦likeâ€¦well, it's kind of like you and Clary, except more complicated," he ventured.

"I'm not following," Jace replied, puzzled.

"Clary is kind ofâ€¦shy about the cameras, right?" Jace nodded. "She doesn't really want to be extremelyâ€¦publicâ€¦with you guys' relationship. She wants to remain a little obscure, right?"

"Yeah, I guess she does. She says she's just shy. Doesn't want to be labeled as 'Jace Lightwood's girlfriend' really. She still wants her own anonymity."

"Well, it's kind of like that exceptâ€¦I justâ€¦I'm not sure I'm ready to beâ€¦public. With Magnus. I mean, fully," Alec supplied lamely.

"Ah. You're not wanting to be overtly obvious about your relationship, because he's a guy," Jace said bluntly.

Alec hung his head shamefully. "It sounds so lame when you say it like that."

"But it's the truth, right? You're just embarrassed because now the rest of the world will find out you're gay? And without an excuse like 'that picture was photoshopped' or some shit like that?" Jace could really cut to the quick sometimes. Alec didn't say anything, letting his silence speak for itself. He felt so low for being embarrassed about Magnus. The night had started out so well. He fingered the tags hanging from his neck in remembrance of their little make out session before departing for the party. He supposed that kind of made it worse. Alec realized that he'd basically shut his own feelings off as soon as they'd exited the limo in front of the hotel. He thought about how that must feel for Magnus. He knew it hurt; how would Alec like it if, when they were alone, Magnus showered him with kisses and nips and loving bites, only to completely clam up and shut him out when they were in public. It was very rude of Alec, but he couldn't see a way around it. It would just take time for him to warm up to the idea of PDA, if he ever _did_ warm up to it. He supposed he would after a while. For now, he just sipped his drink, and sat waiting for his Magnus to return from his ass-kissing obligations.

After about an hourâ€”and two more generously strong Long Islandsâ€”Alec decided he would seek out Magnus for himself. He roamed the large ballroom swarming with designer-clad socialites and celebrities, looking for his beautiful crooner. For some reason, his body was aching for Magnus' arms around him, and he couldn't understand why. He justâ€¦_wanted_ him. Alec had seen Simon and Isabelle making out just outside the doors of the ballroom and instead of feeling overprotective of his sister, he'd just felt jealous. What was stopping him from getting kissed silly by his one and only? Basically nothingâ€¦except that he couldn't find him. It was Christmas, for crying out loud; the season of love and mistletoe and all that shit. And damnit, Alec wanted his mistletoe kiss.

He roamed the party, drink in hand, scanning the crowd for some jet black, slightly glittery hair. What was funny was he found Magnus after a while, but not by his hair. Oddly enough, Alec had honed in on his boyfriend's ass. It was unmistakable, that ass, clad in luscious dark wash designer denim. He'd been dreaming of seeing that ass naked all night long. Maybe feeling it tense as Magnus thrust into him, over and over again with reckless abandon. Oh, how good that would be.

"Hey, babe," Alec said casually as he reached Magnus, who was talking with some suited random that Alec didn't recognize. Magnus' eye popped up in his directionâ€”whether at the sight of Alec or the word he used, Alec didn't know or careâ€”and he calmly dismissed his companion with a 'Would you excuse me?' and a nod.

"Alec, where have you been all night?" Magnus said lightly, knowing full well that Alec had probably been sitting in a corner avoiding the crowds. But Alec wasn't feeling like avoiding people right now. He honestly didn't care if the whole world watched. He wanted a damn kiss. He rose up on his toes to take one, without warning, but Magnus put two hands on his shoulders and pushed him down, a concerned look on his face. "Alec," he began. Then, he leaned in and smelled his boyfriend's breath, and winced slightly. "You're drunk, Alexander. Why are you drunk? This is a Christmas party for crying out loud. I hope it was at least eggnog."

"Long Island Iced Tea, actually. I stopped counting after three," Alec said. His speech wasn't slurring yet, but he could definitely feel the drunken haze creeping in.

"Good lord, Alec." Magnus rolled his eyes. "What's gotten into you? What about all that 'my body is a temple' stuff? Don't athletes, like, stick to that mentality?" Magnus sighed as he took the glass dangling from Alec's hand, and placed it on a passing waiter's tray. Alec felt him grab his elbow and lead him out of the room. When he picked up what was going on, he started to protest.

"Aw, Magnus! Can we dance? Remember when I was afraid of dancing and you taught me and then we made out all night? I miss that. Please can we dance?" Alec knew he sounded deranged, and a little whiney, but he couldn't shut himself up. Plus, he kind of meant what he was saying. He really did miss that feeling of being held against Magnus and the world falling away. He knew there was a reason he shouldn't be wanting to do that _here_, but he couldn't remember what that reason was. He knew Magnus liked sentimental things like dancing, so why was he still pulling Alec out of the room? "Magnus, Magnus! Stop!" He pulled his arm back. "Where are we going? I said I want to dance. Magnus, please hold me and dance with me," he pleaded.

Magnus turned around, the look on his face heart-shattering. Alec didn't understand why he was looking at him like that.

"Alec, I know you don't really want that. Not here. Now come on. Alec, please," Magnus said quietly, like he was placating a child. Alec let Magnus pull him out of the crowd, but he was still mad.

"Magnus, why don't you want to dance with me? Do you not love me?" Alec asked, not really knowing where the question came from. Magnus whirled on him, letting go of his arm.

"I'm not going to smack you for that, since I know it's not really you. _Damn_, you're like a girl when you're drunk."

"What makes you say that? And you still haven't answered my question. Why won't you dance with me?" Alec's voice got quieter and more serious, sobering up just a bit.

"I say you're a girly drunk because you start questioning everything I do and accusing me of not loving you. Now, if I were drunk, and a girly drunk, I probably would have left you at the beginning of the night when you basically shut down and didn't want to be touched by me for fear of a camera. But that's not the case, and yes, I _do_ love you. Which is why I'm not going to let you do something you'll regret in the morning," Magnus replied.

"What do you mean?" Alec asked, steadily sobering up little by little with their argument.

"I mean if we danced in the middle of that room just like everyone else, and pictures showed up on Page 6 tomorrow, you'd be mortified. And I don't want that, because I love you too much to see you upset like before. So we're leaving, Alec," Magnus explained with thin patience.

"Why do you keep calling me that?"

"Alec? Because that's your nameâ€¦" Magnus replied, confused.

"But why are you only using my name? Usually, you'd be calling me all kinds of things. Baby, dear, even the dreaded _beautiful_," Alec said, and Magnus gave him a stern look. "But you're avoiding those at all costs. Why?"

"For the same reasons I just mentioned. While I love watching that scarlet tone creep up your cheeks, I couldn't stand it if I let it slip in front of someone and you looked at me like I'd just shot puppy. I get it, Alec, you don't like being affectionate in public. It's understandable. I'm just doing my best to be respectful of that, and that includes not letting you do something you'll regret in the morning in front of all these people." It broke Alec's heart, the look on Magnus' face as he said these words. He could tell that Magnus _did_ want all those things. He wanted to dance with Alec in front of people. He wants to hold hands and call him baby, but he didn't because he loved Alec and he didn't want to see him uncomfortable. It was killing Alec, seeing that look on Magnus' face.

"Please? I promise I won't bitch about it later. One dance, please? I swear I'm sober now," Alec said.

"I can tell you're not. But you're killing me here, and as much as I fucking loathe it, I can't say no to you. Not with those eyes," Magnus said quietly, taking the moment they were alone outside the doors of the ballroom to stroke Alec's face lightly. "Come on," he said, grabbing Alec's hand this time, lacing their fingers together. "Let's dance, baby," he said softly, almost where Alec couldn't hear. But when it reached his ears, his heart swelled.

Magnus lead them into the adjoining ballroom, where they could still hear the music faintly. It was dark and completely empty, casting an eerie feeling on Alec's psyche. But he allowed himself to be pulled into the vast expanse of the room, with only the light from the crack in the door for them to see by. Magnus guided him to the middle of the large room, and without preamble, wrapped his arm around Alec's waist and pulled him close, taking his other hand and clasping their fingers together between their chests. Alec sighed at the closeness, finally feeling that warm body against his after a whole night of longing to do what he couldn't.

As they danced slow, Alec rested his temple against Magnus' warm cheek. He breathed in the scent of smooth vanilla body wash, layered under a spritz of Magnus' favorite Dolce cologne. It was intoxicating, and so incredibly _Magnus_. He felt Magnus' hand tighten around his waist and welcomed the further contact, their bodies pressed against each other at every surface now. Alec thought his knees might melt when he heard a gorgeously sweet and quiet voice start singing along with the melody, right into his ear. The whole scene was surreal, and Alec never wanted it to end.

"Kiss me," he pleaded in a helpless whisper. "Please, Magnus."

"But there's no mistletoe," Magnus breathed teasingly.

"Pretend," was Alec's answer. He let a low breath caress Magnus' neck, urging him to give in. Alec wanted this, and he really didn't care who knew at this point. And it was okay, they were alone in this huge dark room. No prying eyes or cameras to be seen. And even if there were, Alec was getting used to the idea of not caring. If he could keep this feeling, and maybe even have it in front of other people, he thought he'd be okay with that.

Magnus seemed beyond trying to reason out of it, so he gave in. Alec felt lips brush his that were slightly sticky from worn away lip-gloss. They tasted like candy infused with heaven, and they were soft as an angel's touch. As the kiss built in intensity, Alec sighed rather loudly as Magnus' tongue slipped past the barrier and into his waiting mouth. They'd kissed hundreds of times, but that first venture forth into each other's domain was always able to knock Alec off his feet. It always felt like coming home, as cheesy as that sounds. Alec was still feeling a little bit buzzed, but he wasn't sure if that was the left over alcohol symptoms or just Magnus. He was convinced he could get drunk off Magnus, tasting him deeply like this. But he wanted more.

"Magnus please, please, can we leave?" he begged in a heated whisper to the air between their lips. He didn't even open his eyes; he wouldn't be able to see Magnus' expression in the dark anyway. He could tell, however, that his boyfriend was breathing rather rapidly; this meant that he'd probably had the same reaction to that kiss as Alec had, which was a damn good sign.

Alec's heart and groin leapt at the whispered, "Okay," that came from the darkness against him. Just like that, the two quickly but discreetly called for their car, climbed in, and tried their damnedest to keep their hands off each other in the back seat. Needless to say, they failed miserably.

When they arrived at Magnus' apartment, they scrambled up the stairs and through the front door, ripping clothes as they went. It was a shame; Alec had rather liked that shirt Magnus had on. Now the buttons were flying every which way, and it was quite ruined in other places as well. His own leather jacket was spared, but it was now lying in the middle of the pink and purple living room. Their pants and boxers were last, falling in the path they made to the bedroom. They never stopped advancing toward the bed, and when they were still about five feet away, Magnus unceremoniously grabbed Alec's ass and picked him up, practically throwing him on the bed. Alec didn't mind in the least, as long as Magnus got the hell up there with him and didn't stop kissing him.

Magnus rained fevered kisses and nips all along Alec's jaw and down his neck, stopping at his shoulders. He licked back up his neck, coming back to his lips. Alec sighed into Magnus' mouth as Magnus rubbed their groins together with rough, heated friction. Alec didn't feel deserving of this ravishing attention, but he couldn't stop himself from pulling Magnus closer and grinding back up into him.

"I'm sorry, Magnus. I'm so, so sorry," he whined in between moans. "I shouldn't have been soâ€”"

"Shh. I don't care right now. Just shut up and let me love you, beautiful," Magnus replied, using the sentiment Alec had mentioned earlier. Sometimes it made Alec cringe when he called him that, but when they were in the throes of passion like this, it sparked something in him. For such a gorgeous and godlike creature to call _him_ beautiful, well, that was an anomaly. But he would take it, and it helped the pleasure surge within him.

He wasn't sure how Magnus had found the time to reach to the bedside table and lube up his fingers; sometimes it felt like the singer had eight hands, and they were everywhere on Alec at once. But then, two fingers were right there where he needed them most. He let out a scream to some deity or other, he wasn't really sure which. Magnus was pumping his fingers in and out of Alec with determined swiftness, wasting no time opening him up. Alec bit his lip, and moaned deep in his chest when he felt a third finger. The rotation Magnus was doing was almost too much to handle. He would curl his fingers just so, and Alec would be reduced to a whimpering mess. It was ecstasy. Only one thing could be better than this.

"Magnus, _please_," he whined, biting Magnus' ear since it was close to his mouth. He moaned loudly again as Magnus circled his fingers around inside him. "Please just take me, Magnus. I can'tâ€¦" he didn't know what it was he couldn't do. Couldn't wait any longer. Couldn't take this teasing torture. Couldn't handle this much pleasure racking his body.

And just like that, Magnus' fingers were gone. Another few seconds for him to coat himself in slick liquid, and he entered Alec slowly but firmly.

"Magnusâ€¦mmmmhnnâ€¦." Alec let out a shaky moan, his voice failing him. Nothing would ever compare to the feeling of being stretched so tight and filled to the brim by Magnus, except maybe being the one bestowing the same feeling on his boyfriend in return. But he was on the receiving end tonight, and it was unbearably good.

"Alec, god you're so tightâ€¦"

Magnus wasted no time taking up a firm rhythm, in and out a little faster than their usual beginnings. But it was amazing, and Alec wanted more. He wrapped his legs around Magnus' hips, pressing his heels into his ass, urging him deeper. Apparently, this wasn't good enough for Magnus, because he leaned up and pulled all the way out, making Alec let out the most pathetic whimper. Magnus then grabbed behind Alec's knees, pulling them up and placing them over his shoulders. Then slowly, as if testing Alec's flexibility, he leaned over. Alec, being an athlete, was quite limber; they ended up pressed against each other once again, Alec's knees nearly touching his ears. He was biting his lip in nervous anticipation, waiting for the punchline.

And then, Magnus rammed back into him.

"Shit!" Alec was sure Magnus' neighbors heard both of them scream before Magnus covered his lips with a deliberate kiss. This was deeper than Magnus had ever been in him before; he could practically feel Magnus' cock about to come out of his throat. He let his eyes roll back, lost completely to the exquisite stretch he was feeling as Magnus pressed all the way in and rotated his hips.

His words were reduced to incoherent pants and sighs, his voice giving out after so much screaming and wailing. Magnus was pretty much in the same boat, choosing to bite down on Alec's earlobe and shoulder, his brow glistening with sweat. While Magnus' hands were underneath Alec's shoulders tugging them together with every thrust, Alec's hands snaked their way up to their rightful place. He worked in fingers into the gel that kept Magnus' hair in its perfect coif, pulling the chunky layers apart. When Magnus bit down particularly hard on his shoulder, he would tighten his grip and yank against the strands.

"Fuck, Alec!" Magnus moaned, the sound muffled into Alec's neck. He continued to pound Alec into the mattress, letting out strangled cries all the while. Alec just kept tugging with every thrust, showing Magnus how good it felt in his own way.

They'd been going at it hard and fast for a good half hour. Alec had been steadily losing hold on his releaseâ€”he'd been trying his best to make this lastâ€”and he was about to give out. They were both drenched with sweat, and the comforter and half the pillows were on the floor in a mess.

"Magnus, oh god Magnusâ€¦I'm gonâ€¦gonnaâ€¦" he couldn't get out a full sentence. His body was feeling taxed, irreversibly exhausted, and he still wanted it to continue. But he knew he couldn't hold back anymore. He let go of his release, coming hard between them. The way his whole body shook and tensed, it tightened around Magnus, and finally pulled him through to his own climax. Alec felt Magnus come powerfully inside him, and he couldn't help but tremble. He held on to Magnus' hair still, like if he let go they would disappear. Magnus stayed inside him, keeping his grip on Alec's shoulders. They were both breathing as if they'd run a marathon, unable to move.

After a few minutes, Magnus found the strength the lean up and free Alec's knees for the first time in a half hour. It felt odd to straighten them out, and they were tight and sore, but it was worth it. Alec winced slightly as Magnus pulled out. He was going to be quite sore tomorrow in more ways than one, but he couldn't bring himself to be upset about it. The team was on hiatus for the holidays now anyway, so he didn't have practice. He could just lounge away on the couch as long as he wanted to.

As they lay there in a sweaty haze for a few minutes, Alec spoke up. "I feel like I just played five games in a row, no subs."

"Hmm," Magnus answered. "Is it customary to pound your teammates into oblivion like that? Or is that something you save for special friends?" he teased. He rolled out of the way just as Alec tried to smack him with a pillow. At that moment, though, both of them found it extremely difficult to move very much, so they snuggled up on top of the coversâ€”since they were both burning up anywayâ€”and slipped into dead sleep within minutes.

* * *

**Song for this section: Amy's Song by Switchfoot (Just a mellow background song that I love)**

When Monday rolled around, the midmorning sun filtered in through the sheer purple drapes, finding Magnus and Alec sprawled on the oversized couch, and watching Supernatural re-runs.

"Jesus, Jensen Ackles should be illegal," Magnus said as he ran a finger lightly up and down Alec's bare spine. It was soothing and titillating at the same time. Alec lay across Magnus' lap on his stomach, chuckling softly at his boyfriend's preference for Dean. Alec was a Sam person, himself; he tended to like taller men. "He's just soâ€¦gah! And especially the way he says 'son of a bitch!'â€¦cussing from those lips just makes me melt. Don't even get me started on the times he cries."

"Should I be worried?" Alec asked, a smirk crossing his features where Magnus couldn't see.

"Oh, I don't think so. Not as long as I have this in front of meâ€¦" and Alec then felt Magnus' wandering fingers go down his shorts and graze over his ass, stroking from one cheek to the other, back and forth. He couldn't help but tense up a little in fear.

"Take it easy. Still not fully recoveredâ€¦" he warned. He wanted to smack Magnus for the mocking laugh he let out at that. He was interrupted, however, by a soft knock on the front door.

"Now, who on earth could that be?" Magnus asked aloud to no one in particular.

"Most likely, that would be your Christmas present," Alec said, sitting up and grinning. Magnus raised an exquisite eyebrowâ€”effectively making Alec's crotch unfit for companyâ€”but heaved himself off the couch to answer it anyway. Alec just sat on the couch, and waited for the reaction.

Magnus tentatively opened the door, peeking through the crack as if he was afraid who might be on the other side. But Alec knew he'd seen, when the door flew open and he let out a girlish scream. Another, _actual_ girl scream accompanied it, and Alec watched as Camille dropped her bags and jumped into Magnus' arms.

"Honey oh my god I missed your face so fucking much!" Magnus cried.

"Me too! Ah! I can't believe it's you!" she cried back. He let her go and she slid down to her feet. "Let me look at you, Mr. Magnus Bane, Capitol recording artist!" She stood back, looking him up and down before grabbing him into another bear hug. Alec just sat on the couch watching with a big grin on his face. Then, after a moment, Magnus remembered he was there.

"You did this? You brought her here?" he asked with sparkles in his eyes.

"Well, to be fair, she wouldn't let me pay for more than half the ticket. But I get credit for making the call and the plans," Alec replied. Magnus looked back at Camille, who nodded.

"It's true. I got a phone call saying that my presence was desperately needed to bring a certain boyfriend out of a gal-pal-less funk," she said. "Alec knows he can't hang tough with us. We're Dior warriors," she teased, looking at Alec on the couch with a smile.

"Well, thank you both for the greatest present ever! This is a good thing. You and I can go have a spa and shopping day while poor baby here nurses his sore aâ€”"

"Okay! I'll let you two catch up!" Alec said in interruption, his face growing redder by the second. It didn't help that he slightly winced as he got up off the couch and headed to the kitchen. He could hear Magnus' mocking laugh again, but decided to ignore it.

"Wait! I have one more present for you, sweetness," Camille said to Magnus, "and I want him to witness the squealing when I reveal it." Alec paused in the archway to the kitchen, wondering what Camille was up to. She picked up a small rectangular case, decorated with zebra print and sapphire Swarovski crystals. One end of it was meshed out, and Alec tried to see what was inside it. But Camille beat him to it, unzipping the end and pulling out a tiny ball of white fluff. Before anyone could say anything, said fluff flew into the air and landed on Magnus' chest, clawing at his t-shirt for dear life. Magnus let out a squeal of delight.

"How did youâ€¦? When did youâ€¦? Oh, Chairman!" was all he could manage. He hugged the tiny cat until Alec was sure it was suffocating. But when he let go, even Alec could see that the two were absolutely elated to see one another. It was, by far, the most excruciatingly adorable thing he'd ever seen in his life.


End file.
